


The Masseur

by Amberwinters



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-29
Updated: 2011-01-30
Packaged: 2017-10-15 05:04:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 42
Words: 123,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/157306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amberwinters/pseuds/Amberwinters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU fic where Kris Allen is a successful pop-star and Adam is an out of work actor that just got his massage license and a good job.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Kris Allen knew he had a lot to be thankful for and he was lucky to be living his dream. After 50 shows in 60 days, he was happy to be home even if it was a newly purchased house. He and his wife had decided to take a break from one another. Katy would stay in the Arkansas house while Kris stayed in LA to work on his third album. Kris also wanted to go on a massive health kick so he hired a personal trainer. He hired a female personal trainer hoping it would be easier. He was wrong.

Tara was relentless in her quest to whip Kris into shape. After the first week he felt like he was going to be permanently sore. Tara suggested he hire a masseuse twice a week to relieve his soreness and speed up the recovery time. Kris thought more rest and less work was the better solution but agreed to her suggestion. Tara recommended an established spa that catered to A-listers and were very good. Kris called them up and arranged to have a masseuse come to his house twice a week for an hour and half massage. Kris was happy when a middle aged, eastern European woman showed up. He had specified he wanted a female.

After a month Kris was feeling and looking great. His manager was pressuring him to finish up his songs so he could start recording. Kris was happy to be busy which kept his mind off his failing marriage. After a grueling meeting with record execs and a ridiculous episode with the paparazzi, Kris was looking forward to his evening massage.

He saw his answering machine blinking and played the message.

“Mr, Allen, its Eva. I am sorry but my daughter is in the hospital and I cannot make our session tonight. I have asked one of the other masseuses to take over the session. If that is not what you want, just send them away. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

Kris was disappointed but hoped her daughter was OK. His security phoned and said there was someone new for his usual appointment and wanted to know if they should let them in the gate. Kris said it was fine and went to the door to meet the replacement masseuse. Kris heard the footsteps up the porch and opened the door. He was shocked to see a 6’1’’ raven haired man wearing tight jeans and a glittery shirt. Apparently the attractive man was also surprised when he blurted out,

“Kris Allen.”

“That’s me, who are you?”

“Sorry, I am Adam, Adam Lambert. Eva asked me to fill in for her. I hope that is OK? I trained with Eva so it should feel similar.” The man smiled brightly and had a magnetism about him that prevented Kris from disappointing him.

“Come in. I-I never had a male masseuse.”

“Well, then you are in for a treat.” Adam winked, “We boys have stronger hands.” Adam laughed and Kris loved the sound. It relaxed Kris immediately and filled him with warmth. Kris stepped aside and let Adam in the house. Adam picked up a portable massage table and came in.

“Where would you like me to set-up, Mr. Allen?”

“Um…Eva usually sets up in the gym. Follow me.”

Kris was leading Adam to the gym which had them pass by Kris’ home studio. Adam noticed and stopped,

“Wow. Cool studio. Is this where you record?”

Kris cringed. He did not like people invading his privacy and did not feel like talking about his music. Adam seemed to notice Kris’ reaction.

“Sorry, I don’t get out much.” Adam laughed and Kris smiled in spite of himself.

“It’s ok. I just mess around in there when I write or collaborate with my band. This is the gym.”

“Adam thought it looked like a small dance studio with racked weights, a bench against the wall and a stairmaster in the corner. It had great mirrors. Adam put the table down and noticed the ballet bar.  
He quirked an eyebrow,

“You do ballet?”

Kris laughed, “No it came with the house. The former owner was a dancer. I just converted it into a gym.”

“Nice.” Adam quickly and efficiently set up the table and placed sheets from his back pack on the table. He also took out several oils. “Any preference? I brought sandalwood, eucalyptus, lavender and citrus.”

Kris started to get nervous and a little uncomfortable. He rubbed the back of his neck, “I don’t know. What do you like?”

Adam made a face like he was concentrating, “For you, Mr. Allen, I’d say sandalwood. It is spicy and exciting.”

“Everything I am not?” Kris deadpanned.

Adam laughed like he was genuinely tickled, “I think it is the repressed side to you.”

Kris quirked a brow and then grinned, “I am going to take a quick shower and come back. What should I wear?”

“What do you wear with Eva?”

“Nothing. She uses a sheet…”

Adam gave him conspiring look, “I use a sheet too. I want you to be comfortable. You can wear underwear if it helps you relax. I take it you don’t want a happy ending.”

Kris’ jaw dropped. Adam laughed nervously, “I am sorry. I shouldn’t have joked like that, Mr. Allen. That part of the brain that filters the mouth seems to be broken in me. Please, don’t freak out.”

Kris tensed up, “Maybe I’ll just skip today and wait for Eva.”

Adam looked miserable, “It was a bad joke but I really am a good masseuse. Please, Mr. Allen, I can be serious and professional.”

“No more bad jokes.”

Adam’s eye’s lit up, “Scouts honor.”

Kris went into his room and took a quick shower. He returned in a robe with boxer-briefs underneath. He laid down on the massage table and Adam placed a sheet on his lower body. Kris was still tense but tried to focus on relaxing. He could smell the sandalwood and hear Adam rubbing the oil in his hands to heat it up. Kris felt Adam’s warm hands on his back and felt the tension melt away.

+++

Adam could not believe how lucky he was to get a job in one of the most sought after spas in Los Angeles. Although Adam’s Hollywood connection’s did not help him get any decent acting roles, it did get him an introduction to Linda Lensin the owner of Sumatra Sunset Spa. Linda hired Adam as a massage assistant after he obtained his certification and assigned him to work with Eva. He was grateful Eva was nice and taught Adam real world tricks they didn’t teach in massage school. Eva was a single mother in her late 30s. Adam was surprised when Eva asked him to fill in for her because her daughter was suddenly ill. Adam had accompanied Eva to a couple outcalls but never to her A-list clients. Eva was rushed on the phone and just mentioned her client, Kris was pretty down to earth.

Adam was surprised when he was met by security and blocked from entering the estate. Adam was still not use to the lifestyles of the rich and famous. Frankly, it intimidated him a bit but also made him envious. He had always dreamed that his acting would lead to that type of a success. After 8 years of being a struggling actor, Adam decided he would settle for a steady income and a passionate hobby. Adam never expected to see the top of the charts, American Idol alumni, Kris Allen at the door. In fact, he was so shocked, for the first time he was at a loss of words and blurted out the obvious,

“Kris Allen.” Adam immediately felt stupid and tried to get his nerves under control. He was surprised just how cute Kris was in person. Even though Kris’ music wasn’t Adam’s usual taste, he was a fan and agreed he was one of the sexiest men on the planet.

Adam collected himself enough to respond to Kris’ inquiry and introduced himself. Adam wished Eva had told him it was Kris Allen so he could have found an excuse not to come. Although most people would kill to find out they were giving Kris Allen a massage, Adam was nervous he was going to do something stupid. The guy would be way too distracting and Adam could not afford to lose his job. Still part of him couldn’t help feeling a thrill.

Adam had the feeling Kris was not thrilled about the change. Adam had heard Kris was married and fairly religious but he had never heard he was homophobic. Kris Allen’s declaration of never using a male masseur and the fact that he stated it so awkwardly had Adam wondering. Adam needed to put him at ease and just get the massage over with. Maybe Kris was just shy or threatened. Adam knew between his height and extreme looks, he could seem intimidating. Anyone who knew Adam would never think that he was scary but he could see that a stranger might.

Adam followed Kris to the gym area and could not help but admire the house. Even though it was large, it was simple and classy. He felt the warmth and then saw the studio. Adam was envious and wished he could just record songs any day. Eva had warned him to always stay professional and aloof. Adam could hear Eva’s mantra.

“Since we get physically intimate rubbing their bodies its essential you have clear emotional lines. Even if the client wants emotion never flirt because eventually it will lead to an awkward moment and then you are out a client. Plus, if Linda found out you would be fired and blacklisted.”

Definitely not worth it which is why Adam could not believe what came out of his mouth. Happy endings! What was he thinking even going there and offending one of Eva’s favorite clients. Not only would he be fired but Eva would kill him. He tried to salvage the situation and couldn’t believe Kris caved and was letting him give him the massage.

Adam began tried to focus on giving a good massage and picturing dead grandmas to avoid any embarrassing reactions. Kris was beautiful and had soft skin. For the first time ever, Adam wished his job was seedier and he did get to offer more pleasure. Dead Grandmas, dead grandmas.

Adam could feel Kris relaxing and responding to his touch. Adam focused on his left arm and then the right arm.

“Is the pressure ok? Do you want me to go harder or softer?”

“Feels perfect.”

Adam could not agree more he moved down to Kris’ lower back and was disappointed to feel the elastic of underwear. Adam remained focused and just massaged around the elastic. And then moved the sheet to expose the bottom half of Kris’ body and luckily bit hit lip to stop him form commenting on what a great ass he had. Adam felt Kris tense up as he moved his hands up Kris thigh. Adam was always careful with men not to stray too far up on the inside of the thigh to avoid any unpleasant surprises. Kris was a little ticklish on the back of his thighs which Adam thought cute.

“Your wife must have a blast teasing you.” Adam bit his tongue. He felt Kris immediately stiffen. “I’m really fucking up today, aren’t I? I really meant that innocently.”

“Maybe you should try being silent.”

Adam laughed, “You have a deal, Mr. Allen, I won’t say anything else.”

“Definitely don’t say Mr. Allen again. If you are going to say things to make me uncomfortable at least use my first name.”

Adam couldn’t help out smile at that and thought maybe Kris wasn’t that offended. Adam finished the back side of his body and asked him to roll over. Kris turned over and Adam adjusted the towel over his groin area. Adam lifted his leg and placed it on his own chest so he could loosen up the knee and get the feet. He locked eyes with Kris which distracted him to no end.

Adam just concentrated on what he was doing. Kris squirmed when Adam started on his foot.

“Did I hurt you?”

“No, my feet are ticklish too.”

Adam smiled and moved on to the other leg. He then moved to the other side of the table and started rubbing Kris’ shoulders and head. He felt Kris instantly relax when he was rubbing his head. Adam continued longer than usual and heard Kris breathing very evenly. Adam lightly ran his hands down Kris’ arms and knew he was sleeping. Adam took advantage and just stared at Kris and wished he could find a gay version that would be into him.

“Are you checking me out?”

Shit. As if the session could not go worse. Adam smiled, “I was debating on whether I should let you sleep or wake you up.”

“I guess the massage successfully relaxed me.” Adam watched Kris sit up. Adam grabbed Kris’ robe and placed it next to him. He then turned away and packed up his stuff. He heard Kris stand up and stretch.

“Thanks, man. I feel pretty good. You are a little stronger than Eva.”

“Do you always do Swedish?”

“I don’t know.”

“You should try different styles. Eva does deep tissue and shiatsu. I just took a seminar on hot stones which is very relaxing.”

“I am a simple guy. Do I owe you anything besides a tip?”

Adam shook his head, “No and instead of a tip can you just not tell Eva about my screw ups. I really need this job.”

Kris just shrugged, “No worries, Adam. I would be careful with the jokes, though." Kris walked him to the door and placed a bill in Adam’s hand.

“Thanks, Adam.”

“Have a great night, Kris Allen.”

Adam walked out and saw Kris had given him $100 tip which was high. Adam usually only got between $20-$30 from his best clients. Adam was suddenly jealous that Eva had such generous clientele. Adam just hoped Kris did not mention the happy ending joke to Eva.


	2. Chapter 2

Tara was still working Kris hard and ignored his pleas for just a two-pack set of abs. Eva returned for the next massage session. Kris was glad since he was more comfortable with her but he recognized a brief feeling of disappointment in not seeing Adam. He had felt a little off since his massage with Adam. He had told Katy about it and she thought he was being old fashioned and too alpha. They had laughed about it.

Eva smiled apologetically to Kris, “I am so sorry about last time, Mr. Allen, my daughter got sick and I had to rush her to the hospital. I hope you were OK with Adam.”

“Yeah, he was fine. He was different.”

Eva laughed, “He is actually a really good masseur and the women love him. I know sometimes men get weird about other men massaging them so I hope you weren’t uncomfortable. I know sometimes Adam can be a bit much.”

“Really, it was fine.”

“Next week I need to take my daughter back to the doctor and it will be an all day affair. We can reschedule or I can have Adam or Rachel come in my place. Rachel is good and female.” Eva smiled.

Kris felt a flutter in his stomach and spoke before thinking it through, “Adam is fine. He knows where I live and security will remember him.”

“Great. Shall we get started.”

“Sure, is your daughter going to be OK?”

Eva smiled, “I hope so.”

Kris enjoyed the massage but it wasn’t as scintillating as the one with Adam. Kris was surprised at his feelings, he and his friends had always joked that they would never let a dude massage them. Kris was not homophobic but he wasn’t actively homosexual either. Not to mention Adam had skirted the line of professionalism and Kris wondered if Adam was gay. He decided not to ask Eva.

Eva finished up, “So I will tell Adam to be here at 6:30 on Friday.”

“Perfect. I hope your daughter is OK.”

“Thanks.”

Kris spent the next few days in the studio laying down tracks with his band. He remembered at 5pm on Friday that he had a massage with Adam. He finished up in the studio and got home at 6pm. He almost laughed at himself as he caught himself primping after his shower. Security announced Adam had arrived and was headed up to the house. Kris felt his heart race and wondered what the fuck. He heard Adam’s footsteps and noticed it was 6:29. Kris opened the door and saw Adam smiling. He looked amazing with his hair slicked back in a pompadour, faux tan and dark eyeliner rimming his eyes. He looked like a hot clubber.

“Hi, Adam. I like the look.”

Adam’s smile widened to a full grin, “Really? I just came from a photo shoot for my friend. He designs clothes and needed a male model.”

“Where is your massage table?”

“Oh fuck! Sorry, Mr. Allen, I rushed to and from the shoot. I have everything else. I just keep impressing you, huh?”

“Well, at least you haven’t made any offensive jokes yet.”

“I am really going to try to not be that creepy guy. Shall we go upstairs and do it on your bed?”

Kris coughed nervously. Adam grimaced and then laughed,

“I was being creepy again, huh? I just thought maybe you would be more comfortable in your bed. We could do it on the floor...”

“No, the bed is fine. Eva mentioned most of you clients are women, don’t you creep them out?”

“Of course not. They think I am sweet and harmless. Besides, I think you bring out the creep in me.”

Kris just stared at Adam and Adam shifted under his glare,

“I meant that in the best possible way. Shall we get started, Mr. Allen. I really don’t want to choke on my foot anymore.”

They went up to his room. Kris was really uncomfortable. Adam was going through his back pack and turned around as Kris was opening his shirt. Adam looked as if he was going to speak but then hesitated and stared at Kris for a few seconds.

“Why don’t I step outside and let you get ready. But, let me put the sheets down first so we don’t get oil on your bedding. You can just lay on your back with one of the sheets over you.” Adam quickly put down the sheets and stepped out of the room. Kris got undressed. He decided to forgo the underwear. Adam knocked a few minutes later.

“Can I come in?”

“Yes.”

Adam came in and set up some candles and incense on the dresser. Kris liked the lavender scent in the air. Adam came over by him and set the oil on his night table.

“Does anything hurt? Do you want anything special?”

“No, I guess the same as last time.”

“How about I mix it up with some shiatsu? Will it freak you out if I take my shirt off? This is an expensive top and I don’t want to get oil on it.”

“No it is fine. You are leaving your pants on right?”

Adam laughed infectiously, “Of course and I am only going to use my hands.”

“You’re creeping again.” Kris couldn’t help but smile.

“Sorry, turn over and I will get started.”

Kris rolled over to his stomach. Adam came over and shifted him towards the edge of the bed. Kris had a low platform bed which was much lower than a massage table. Still once Adam began it felt amazing. He was going deeper than last time and Kris was starting to tense. Adam noticed and eased up. He was running his finger tips up and down the length of Kris’ back to relax him. This gave Kris the chills. Eva never did that.

“You good, Mr-Kris?”

“Mm. It’s good.”

Adam’s fingers ghosted the top of Kris’ ass which excited him but also made him nervous. Before Kris could react the fingers were gone and Adam adjusted the sheet to expose one side of his lower body.

“Are you OK with me touching your buttocks or do you want me to skip to your hamstrings? I don’t want to creep again.”

Kris wanted Adam to touch him and was starting to get hard. “I’m fine with whatever. You weren’t skittish about it last time.”

“You weren’t naked last time,”

“I didn’t know you then,” Kris responded defensively.

Adam laughed hysterically, “Sorry, I didn’t know we bonded. Look, I get nervous with men sometimes.”

“Really,” Kris was surprised by the admission.

“Well, I don’t get nervous with men in general but I do when I am massaging straight men.” Adam had resumed rubbing the side of Kris’ buttock which was intense. Kris couldn’t take much more and was glad when Adam moved his hands over his buttock on to his hamstrings.

“God, you are beautiful.”

“What!”

“Shit, I said that out loud, didn’t I? Let’s just pretend I am retarded and ignore me. I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable with my comment.”

Kris laughed, “On the bright side, it would have been worse if you pointed out my flaws.”

Adam moved on to the other leg and readjusted the sheet. He continued in silence methodically massaging him. Kris just focused on the feel of Adam’s hands pressing, squeezing, and manipulating his muscles. Adam moved the sheet back over his groined area and asked him to turn over. Kris was nervous because he was sporting a semi-hard on and was pretty sure Adam would notice.

+++

“He wants me to take your place? Really? I got the feeling he preferred a female.”

“I know but I gave him the option of Rachel and he said you knew where the house was. Maybe he just likes them pretty,” Eva joked.

“Shut up. OK, he is a good tipper.” Adam had mixed feeling about accepting.

“Don’t think you are going to steal my client.” Eva became more serious, “Adam, I know you are a professional but don’t forget he is married and we don’t flirt with clients. Don’t look at me like that because I know your type and aside from being straight he is exactly your type.”

“Do you think I would risk my job for a no shot? I promise I won’t let you down.”

“Good, because Linda would not only fire you but make sure you never worked in a decent spa again. Be at his house by 6:30 on Friday.”

On Friday morning, his friend Cassidy called him up and begged him to fill in for a model that did not show up. Adam didn’t want to but he could use the hundred dollars and Cassidy promised to give him a jacket. He rushed to the shoot across town and modeled for six hours. Adam was glad he had thrown his work kit in his car since he would have to go straight to Kris Allens house to make the 6:30 appointment.

Adam congratulated himself for making it there before 30 seconds before 6:30. He waited for Kris to open the door feeling pretty smug.

“Where is your massage table?”

“Oh Fuck!” Bad Adam. He began to mumble his excuses and knew this would heighten the awkwardness. The last thing Adam wanted was to give Kris Allen a massage on his bed which would be far too intimate and of course that is just what Adam stupidly suggests. To make matters worse, apparently Adam saves all his inappropriate statements until he is in Kris Allen’s presence. So after mentioning that Kris makes him more of a pervert than usual he follows him up to his bedroom to complete the hardest massage of his life.

Adam tried to focus is attention on setting up the limited supplies he did remember to bring and turned to Kris to lighten the mood. He is distracted when he sees Kris undressing. Although that is what is expected, the combination of being in his bedroom and him being the hottest man alive caused Adam’s mind to reel. He needed to regroup. Adam tells Kris he will let him get ready in private hoping to establish more boundaries. Adam waits outside and tries to regain control by talking to himself.

You can do this Adam. He is a married client that does not like men. If you cross the line you will be fired and end up on skid row. Do not screw this up. For once, use a filter!

Adam knocked on the door and entered after Kris invited him back. Adam feels better and asks Kris what he likes. Adam notices he has his favorite urban decay shirt on and decides nothing is worth ruining that. He also made a mental note to add a t-shirt to his working back pack. He is amused by Kris joking about leaving his pants on but of course forgot his filter bantering back about using only his hands. Luckily, Kris is amused and not offended.

Adam begins the massage and immediately notices Kris is naked. Not good. Well, good but not good. Adam could not believe the hotness of Kris Allen. He had spent the last week fantasizing about steamy sex scenes between them which was not helping. Adam was trying to be objective but knew some of his touches were on the line.

As Adam moved to his lower body he couldn’t help but think, God you are gorgeous. Fuckity-Fuck-Fuck, he said it out loud. There was no blowing by that one. Adam apologized praying Kris would let it slide. Well, at least that would insure he was not in this position again because he was going to get FIRED.  
Again, Kris surprised him by taking it in stride and as a simple compliment.

Adam decided his only option was to keep his big mouth shut and hopefully somehow get through the next half hour without incident. He finished and asked Kris to turn over. Adam could not help but notice Kris was sporting a slight erection. Not unusual but very hot and it was making Adam’s semi become a complete hard on. A horny Adam was a bad Adam. Dead grandmas, dead grandmas! Adam knew his libido always got him in trouble.

“Don’t say anything,” Kris warned.

Adam couldn’t stop himself and laughed because it was kind of funny in the most awkward way. Hoping to salvage his demise,

“Do you want a minute?”

Kris glared at Adam, “I think you may need more time than me. I haven’t gotten too many massages but I don’t think the massager is supposed to be sporting a raging hard on.”

Adam nodded knowing he deserved the chastisement, “I am sorry. I am gay and you are really hot. I am trying to be professional and I promise I won’t cross the line. Do you want me to stop?” Adam felt horrible and knew this was far worse than what he had envisioned to be a worst case scenario. Adam stood in nerve-racking silence as Kris looked at him for what felt like hours.

“I don’t want you to stop.” He saw Kris shift, “In fact, I think I’d like a little more.”

Adam’s jaw dropped to the floor. Did Kris Allen just imply he was looking for a happy ending? Did Adam Lambert die and go to heaven? Adam must have showed his eagerness and willingness to comply as he moved back toward Kris. However, the next thing he heard stopped him dead in his tracks.

“Whoa, easy dude. I meant more of a massage. You know I am not gay, right? I am married. This is too weird.” Kris got up and wrapped the sheet around him.

Now that really was the worst case scenario on the planet.


	3. Chapter 3

Panic. Kris felt a little bad seeing Adam’s face drop when Kris back tracked and apparently convinced Adam that he had misinterpreted Kris’ comment. Kris had wanted a happy ending but seeing Adam moving towards him with raw desire caused panic to set in. Kris was America’s most loved pop star and could not afford to be embroiled in a homosexual scandal. Adam seemed like a nice guy but he also seemed to have no control over his mouth. Really though Kris wasn’t thinking quite that deeply but he did think enough to know he felt sexually intimidated by Adam.

Kris knew it was a mean thing to do as he watched Adam lust immediately transform into regret and humiliation. Kris’ analytical contemplation was interrupted by the sound of Adam pleading,

“-I know I have no right to ask this but is there anyway we can keep this between us? I really need this job and if I lose it, I will be black listed from working anywhere decent.”

“OK, but maybe you should stick with female clients because most men would not be so understanding.”

Adam’s relief was evident, “Thank you so, so much. This has never happened before, I swear. I totally misread the signs.”

“No shit, Sherlock.” OK, now Kris was being mean for no good reason. Well, maybe to make sure he kills the mood enough so he doesn’t give in and beg for the happy ending.

“Is there any way I can make this better?”

Kris was starring at the saddest, biggest blue eyes he had ever seen. Apparently, the lack of a filter was contagious and caused him a moment of honesty, “I freaked out and lied. I did want…er…”

Adam seemed wary but hopeful, “A happy ending?”

“Well…yeah.” Kris let the sheet drop and watched Adam’s jaw drop simultaneously which made him giggle. The appreciative look Adam was giving him was helping Kris forget his nervousness and fueling his lust.

“Can I use more than my hands?”

Kris felt the nerves come back up, “I don’t…you know..do. You know what I mean?”

“Well, I don’t speak code but I just meant my mouth.”

Kris laughed, “Yeah, that would be…good.”

Kris laid down on the bed invitingly. Adam climbed on the bed and straddled his hips with his knees. Holding his weight up on his hands and knees he started kissing Kris’ chest and working his way down his stomach. Kris could not believe he was doing this. He had never cheated on Katy before and had certainly never allowed a man to do this. He had fantasized about it before and knew he was not 100% straight but he was at least 95%. Kris felt Adam’s tongue across his pelvis and the heat of his breath moving towards his cock. Kris was no longer capable of coherent thought and moaned aloud when Adam took him in his mouth. It was clear that as magical as Adam’s hands were, they had nothing on his tongue.

Kris was amazed as Adam took all of him in and seemed to genuinely like giving a blow job. He knew it was wrong but couldn’t help compare Katy’s willingness to Adam’s eagerness. Adam was a man who seemed to really like dick and more importantly really knew how to give pleasure. After a few minutes, Kris could not form words which is why he didn’t object to Adam’s finger entering him. Katy certainly had never done that and he found himself getting sad for all the times he missed out. Kris started thrusting which he knew was rude but Adam instead of objecting actually pulled Kris’ hips to him. Unable to hold back, Kris came hard in Adam’s mouth. As soon as he felt the last shivers of his orgasm, panic set in. Kris instantly realized what he had done and needed to make it go away. Without thinking, Kris jumped up and turned to a surprised Adam,

“Er…I have to meet someone in a little while. Thanks, can you see yourself out.”

Adam just stared at him in confusion as he still seemed to be swallowing the remnants of Kris’ cum and getting his bearings. Kris was starting to break into even more of a sweat and getting nauseous. He quickly went to his pants and grabbed his wallet. He took out $300 and dropped it on the bed next to Adam.

“I expect you to keep this between us,” Kris stated matter-of-factly and quickly went into his bathroom to shower. He hoped Adam would be gone when he finished. Kris stood under the hot shower and heard some banging and then his bedroom door slam shut.

+++

Adam stared at the money on the bed. What the fuck just happened. Adam still had the bitter sweet taste of Kris in his mouth which proved he had done well or at least succeeded in getting Kris off. What the fuck went wrong. This should have been the hottest sexual encounter of his life and was up until... Yet, in the matter of seconds he had gone from elated to hurt. Did he just become a fucking whore? Kris Allen had literally certainly treated him like a dirty whore. Apparently, a blow job from Adam was worth $200 to Kris fucking Allen. Adam wanted to bust into the bathroom and punch him out but luckily a cooler head prevailed. He needed Kris to keep cool about the incident. What if Kris Allen lodged a complaint? They would definitely believe the millionaire, god-loving, boy next door pop-star over the sleazy, gay, somewhat fashionable, black nail polish wearing masseur. No, Adam needed to just leave.

Adam glanced at the money and thought of pulling a pretty woman by leaving on principle but then remembered his rent was due and the leather pants he wanted. Adam grabbed the money along with his stuff and left. Of course the theater influence forced him to slam the bedroom door for effect.

Adam decided to go out and get drunk. A night out with his friends would either lighten his mood or get him in trouble. Either way, it would keep his mind off the schizophrenic heart breaking Kris Allen. The night was a success on both counts since he had fun getting obliterated and then had the joy of waking up next to his ex, Brad. Luckily, they were both still dressed which meant he had the sense not to fuck up his life more. Adam got up which woke Brad.

Brad rubbed his eyes and looked at Adam, “What is going on, babe? You haven’t drank like that since I dumped you.”

Brad typically kicked people when they were down. His only saving grace was he could keep secrets better than anyone Adam had ever met.

“I really fucked up at work and I could lose my job. This is bad, Brad.”

“Really?”

“Yeah my career could be over and I could get black listed from all the good spas.”

Brad shook his head, “First of all you do not have a career, you have a fucking trade. You gave up your career, remember. Second, maybe if you lose your stupid job, you will finally get the balls to go back to singing and acting.”

“Shut-up, Brad. I still need to eat. It gets worse. I was literally a whore last night. I gave this hot guy a massage and thought we hit it off. I gave him a blow job and he paid me $300 and told me to leave.”

“$300? Problem solved. You found your second calling. I’ll help pimp you out.”

“Shut up. It gets worse. The guy was Kristopher fucking Allen.”

“How is that worse? He is hot. I knew that twink was gay.”

“Brad,” Adam warned “You can’t tell anyone and he is married.”

“Relax, I leave outing people to Perez. So you got to suck Kris-I’m such a Christian-Allen’s cock. Good for you. Was he good?”

Adam smiled as he thought about it, “He was really fucking hot. I think it was his first time with a guy and he was sooo responsive. Perfect body and just yummy.”

“OK, you forgot to add that part how he is not as hot as me. Anyway, how are you losing your job? The boy can’t tell anyone he would be humiliated.”

“He could say I took advantage. He totally freaked out as soon as he came.”

“Straight men are assholes like that, just ask women. Besides he would not admit to that because it would make him look like a pussy. Relax, carve another notch in your bed post and move the fuck on. Hey, why don’t you take me shopping to get you mind off this. It will improve your mood and certainly would help mine especially if you bought me nice stuff.”

“No need. You made me feel better already.” Adam kissed Brad on the head, “I have to go but I’ll see you Tuesday at the Upright.” The Upright Cabaret was one of the few gigs Adam kept and he performed on Tuesday nights. It was a small, intimate club and it kept his vocals in shape.

Adam went home and slept for a few hours. He went to work at 2pm and was happy when no one seemed to react differently to him. Of course, Kris just may not have had a chance to complain yet. On Sunday, Adam worked with Eva. Eva immediately asked him how it went with Kris. Adam decided to lie,

“Fine, nothing out of the ordinary.”

“He is a super nice guy. I haven’t met his wife yet but she looks nice in pictures. He is by far my easiest client.”

“Yeah, well I like massaging women better. I’d rather touch men for sex.”

“Then it is good you stick to female clients. Well, I’m sure I’ll hear if you screwed up,” Eva joked.

Adam laughed mechanically and offered a silent prayer that Kris would be kind. Later that day, Adam was inventorying the supplies when Eva came in,

“Adam, Kris Allen is on the phone.”

Adam paled, “For me?”

“He asked for you. You better not steal my client.”

“No, I think I forgot something at his house,” Adam lied. Adam picked up the phone and noticed Eva stayed in the room giving him the stink eye.

“Hello, Mr. Allen.”

“Adam, about the other-“

“Oh good I thought I had lost my incense holder. Great, sure I’ll just pick it up from the security shack. Thanks so much, Mr. Allen.”

“Is someone there?”

“Yes, Eva is right here.”

“Can you pick up in another room?”

“No, not really. Take care, Mr. Allen.” Adam hung up the phone and turned to Eva, “That was nice that he noticed the incense holder because it is one of my favorite. Brad gave it to me.”

Eva rolled her eyes, “Whatever. My daughter is going in for test on Tuesday can you take my 4 o’clock, it’s a b-list actress.”

“Sure, what about Mr. Allen isn’t he on tuesday?”

“Rachel will do that. Kris asked for a female.” Eva shrugged and just walked out. Adam was disappointed that Kris wanted someone else. He knew he should just be elated that Kris didn’t get him fired but he still felt disappointed. Adam assumed Kris was going to explain that it was a one time mistake and that he didn’t want to ever see him again. Adam was glad he didn’t give him the chance since really that would just be rubbing salt on a wound. No need, Adam got it. Adam just hoped Kris wasn’t dumb enough to call back.


	4. Chapter 4

Regret. Kris wasn’t sure what he regretted more-cheating on Katy or freaking out on Adam. Kris finished up his shower and went back in the room. He knew Adam had left angry but maybe Adam did this kind of thing all the time. After all he wasn’t the most professional massage therapist and pretty much flirted from day one. At least that was the story Kris would stick with. Kris wasn’t really sure how much to tip but he thought $300 was generous but maybe it wasn’t enough. Unable to obtain resolution, he decided to do what he did best and just ignore the situation.

By Sunday, Kris accepted the fact that he could not get Adam off his mind. He called the Sumatra Sunset Spa and asked to speak to Adam. The receptionist said he was with a client and put him through to Eva.

“Hi Kris, was everything OK last week?”

“Yeah. How is your daughter?”

“OK. She has another test on Tuesday. I am sorry but I really am not purposely scheduling them on your days. The doctor she is seeing is very busy and I have to take what I can get.”

“Oh, that is alright so Adam will be coming?”

“Adam has another client. Rachel will be available and she is really good. Is that OK?”

Kris was disappointed, “Sure. I need to speak to Adam about something unrelated, do you know when he will be free?”

Kris could tell Eva was surprised, “Oh, I think he just finished with his client so I will get him for you.”

Kris felt his heart race as he wondered what to say. He wanted to make sure Adam wasn’t going to tell anyone and also wondered at the possibility of a repeat performance. Unfortunately, Adam came on the line, said a few cryptic things and basically hung up on Kris. Kris decided to try and get in touch with Adam another way.

Kris went to the studio that night and found out their recordings for the previous three sessions were lost so they had to redo them that night and the next day. Kris worked ten hours took a three hour nap and worked another ten hours and then crashed. At least work had made him forget about Adam for a day or two. He woke up at around 4 pm on Tuesday in time for his personal trainer. He showered after the workout and waited for his massage therapist hoping Adam’s client cancelled and he showed instead of Rachel.

Unfortunately, at 6:15, a perky, 20 year old red-head showed up. She was pretty and looked like a cheerleader slash porn-star. Had he not been infatuated with a raven haired, sexy slash creepy (in a good way) certain masseur, he would have been elated.

“Hi, Mr. Allen, I am Rachel your massage therapist for this session.”

“Hi Rachel.” Kris took the massage table from her and led her upstairs to the gym. She noticed the music studio, “Adam, totally freaked out that you had this studio.” Rachel hesitated, “Not that we talk about clients…”

Apparently, the whole spa had filtering issues. Kris just smiled, “Is Adam into music?”

“Into music? That boy can sing his face off. He was in a couple plays and a band for a while. He sings at a club once a week and is amazing.”

Interesting. Kris kept his voice neutral, “Where does he perform?”

“He plays at a the Upright Cabaret on Tuesday nights it is in WeHo. So, do you want to try a Thai massage? That is my specialty.” Rachel handed Kris what seemed to be a white karate robe. “Put this on. Thai is done dry and through the robe.”

Kris complied and spent the next ninety minutes being contorted, stretched and cracked. Apparently, Rachel was a sadistic gymnast and much stronger than she looked. Kris made a mental note to never get a Thai style massage again. Once Kris could move again he got done and decided to check out the Upright Cabaret. He intentionally didn’t wear plaid hoping not to get recognized. He put on a Black t-shirt and jeans and a baseball cap praying it was not a dressy place.

Kris arrived at the club and was happy it was casual. He went inside and was bombarded by a power ballad with noted that seemed to soar to the stratosphere. Kris looked at the small stage and saw Adam singing with a pianist. Kris took a seat at the bar and ordered a beer. Even with all his popularity, Kris was good at blending in and not getting noticed. He should have taken security with him but really didn’t want to play the famous guy. Kris pulled his hat lower and watched Adam. He looked good in tight black, leather pants and a bedazzled t-shirt. Beautiful and hot!.

+++

Adam tried not to think about Kris and by Tuesday was satisfied his job was no longer in question. Adam made a promise to himself to never get involved with a heterosexual, married, pop-star. Not that the opportunity arose frequently but making that kind of rule made him feel like he had achieved some personal growth. Adam decided to dress up for the Upright. He needed an excuse to wear his brand new leather pants which were courtesy of Kris Allen’s BJ money. His ego needed him to be fierce that night so he did his hair in a perfect pompadour, put on full makeup and donned lots of rings. He looked good, damn good.

Adam went in the club and sat at a table with a few of his friends. He still felt off so he ordered a few vodka martinis. By the time the fourth one arrived he was feeling much more festive and ready to perform. Brad came in with their mutual friend Cassidy. Brad checked Adam out,

“Good for you for being on the prowl. You always look your best when you are getting over people.” Adam decided to ignore Brad hoping he would lose interest from picking on him. Adam went up for his first of three sets. He had a feeling the performance was going to get raunchier as the night wore on especially since he knew he would continue to drink.

Adam loved the stage and loved to sing. Music was his great release and he always felt like he communed with the universe when he sang. Although Adam was “on the prowl”, he wasn’t really even scanning the audience. He did notice the cougars in a booth by the stage but mostly because they were giving him cat calls and staring at him relentlessly. If he were straight and into older women, he would never be alone. Cougars loved him. Actually, all women loved him which was the great cosmic joke being that he was 100% gay. Aside from the occasional drunk kissing, Adam only liked men but with enough drinks Adam was up for most things. A drunk Adam was an easy Adam.

Adam finished and accepted all the generous praise from the patrons as he made his way to the bar. He sat down and the bartender brought him a vodka martini and said it was from the guy at the end of the bar. Adam accepted and looked down the bar and saw a small guy in a baseball cap. Adam couldn’t really see his face but the body was good and he looked to be Adam’s type. Adam held up the drink to him to acknowledge the gesture and took a deep sip. Adam normally would have gone over but he decided to wait until he was drunker. The guy obviously unfamiliar with Adam’s plan, came over immediately and sat down.

“I had no idea you could sing like that.”

Adam froze upon hearing the slight southern drawl, “Fuck.” He looked over at the guy who he now knew was Kris Allen and in a Humprey Bogart accent, “Of all the joints…”

Kris laughed, “Hi Adam. I wanted to apologize for being so abrupt the other day.”

How about for treating me like a whore, asshole. Instead Adam went with, “You are apologizing for being…abrupt?

“Yeah. I was nervous. Anyway, I would appreciate you not telling anyone. I am…married.”

“Sure, Kris. Anything else?”

“You look good tonight. I like the pants.”

“Well, you bought them or I should say I bought them with your money. Hey, maybe I can give you a hand job and get a matching top.”

Kris’ jaw dropped and Adam felt happy. Kris shifted and then looked at Adam, “Do-do you do that for money?”

Adam looked at Kris and then had to look away. Did he actually just ask Adam if he was a whore? Adam knew he could be a little slutty but this was really rich. Before Adam could respond Kris continued.

“I’d be willing to, you know, pay you.”

“How much?” Adam could barely contain his anger but was also curious what is going price would be.

“I don’t know. Five hundred dollars?”

Insulted not only by the low number but the fact that Kris really thought he was a whore, Adam responded,

“That is just wrong. Anyway, I am not a whore, Kris. Other than you, no one has ever paid me for sex. Did you think I sucked you off for a bigger tip? I just thought you were hot and I thought maybe you liked me to.”

“Fuck, Adam, I am sorry. I am not good at this stuff. I have been with the same woman since forever and I have never been with a man.”

“Well even a virgin that’s never left the house would no better than to assume someone’s a whore. Why the fuck would you pay for it anyway? Even if you weren’t rich and famous, you are hot enough to get anyone you want for free.”

Adam looked at his watch and knew he had to go back up. “I have to go do my set. Are you going to hang around?”

“Yeah, I want to see your set.”

Adam went up and started singing his next set. This time he had an acoustic guitarist accompanying the piano and was able to perform some rock songs. As he predicted he did get a little raunchier and could not help looking toward the bar. Kris was watching him almost as intensely as the cougars but the difference was Kris’ stares excited Adam. Adam hoped he didn’t get a full hard on but the stage always excited him so he usually had a little bulge while performing.

Adam finished up the set and went back by Kris. He told the bartender to bring them some shots. Kris did two in a row and looked as if he was getting a really good buzz. Adam didn’t want to get him sick so he refrained from ordering more.

“Why did you come here tonight after requesting a female masseuse instead of me?”

Kris looked at him quizzically, “What do you mean? Eva said you had a client.”

“What a bitch. She thinks I am stealing you. She told me you wanted a female. All well, it is probably better this way. I really don’t usually cross the line like that but there was no way I could say no to you.”

“I really am sorry about the whore thing. I am use to 13 year old girls being into me but I just kind of assumed you…”

“Wanted money? Let’s just drop it. I forgave you after I bought my pants,” Adam smiled at Kris.

“I have to do a radio interview at seven in the morning so I should get going.”

“I will walk you out. I have a half hour before my next set.”

Kris and Adam walked out of the club and while waiting for the valet, Adam guided Kris to the side of the building.

Adam decided to put himself out there, “Do you want to call me sometime?”

Kris hesitated which made Adam feel stupid, “Never mind. Have a good-“ Adam was interrupted by Kris clumsily pulling Adam into a kiss. Adam was caught off guard but then realized his good fortune. He started kissing Kris back. Adam knew he was a good kisser. He had the big, soft lips and talented tongue that no one could resist including Kris Allen. Adam had closed his eyes and was getting into it when he felt Kris suddenly push him back and heard the snapping of cameras. He opened his eyes and they were surrounded by paparazzi.

Adam was getting his bearings as he heard Kris, “Get off me, man. I am not gay and I don’t know you.”

Kris ran to the front of the building and Adam just stood there stunned as the flashes went off. He heard the paparazzi asking him his name and calling him a pervert. Adam ran to the back of the building and slipped into the club. Adam went to the bar and did three shots of vodka and hoped he would die of alcohol poisoning or California would get hit with the great quake.


	5. Chapter 5

Fear. Kris opened his eyes to the flashes of cameras and immediately reacted like a cornered animal. Even in his buzzed state the alarms went off in his head telling him to lie. Without thinking it through, Kris pushed Adam away and pretended he didn’t know him. Kris ran to the front ignoring the pursuing paparazzi. He vaguely heard their questions. Who is your friend, Kris? Is that your boyfriend? Where is your wife? Taking a walk on the wild side?

Luckily, the valet had brought his car and security kept the paparazzi away so Kris could get in the car and drive away. Kris knew he was not in a good state to drive and knew if he got a DUI he was done. He pulled over a few blocks away and called his publicist, Gina. Gina was a force to reckon with and a real bitch but very effective. She would know what to do.

“Gina, its Kris. I’m drunk in my car avoiding paparazzi that just photographed a guy kissing me.”

“Kris Allen?”

“Yes, help me.”

“Is this a joke? Where are you?”

“I am in West Hollywood a couple blocks down from La Cienega and Santa Monica Blvd. Come get me.”

“Why didn’t you call your security guy, Jake.”

“I am drunk Gina; work with me. Did you hear the part where my picture was taking with a guy kissing me?”

“Stay put. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

Kris sat in his car wondering what to say and what he was going to do. He wanted to die and wished he had not gone out. He did feel bad about throwing Adam to the wolves but Adam could probably handle himself. After all, Adam was out and unmarried.

Gina came twenty minutes later and they parked his car somewhere it would be safe for the night. Kris climbed in her car and Gina started driving toward Kris’ house in Beverly Hills.

“So what the hell happened?”

“I went to this lounge and this guy who works at the spa I get my massages from was playing. He came by me at the bar and we did some shots. I decided to head home and he walked me out. While we were waiting for the car he tried to kiss me and that is when all the paparazzi were there. I pushed him away and ran.”

“Do you think he set you up? He is a performer right?”

Kris knew he was telling half truths, well maybe lies, but he was way too embarrassed to be honest. He was not ready to admit to anyone he was bisexual.

“I don’t think he set me up. I think he just had a crush.”

“How much did you have to drink?”

“I don’t know he bought me a bunch of shots.”

“He was probably trying to get you drunk. Maybe he slipped you some X. You can be really naïve. What is his name?”

“He didn’t drug me. Does it matter what his name is?”

“Yes, Kris, because the paparazzi will know it by tomorrow. Did he assault you at all? He might be a psycho.”

“No! Look I don’t want to get the guy in trouble. He seems harmless enough.”

“Harmless? I think he might have seriously damaged your career. Look, you have a radio interview and we need to get ahead of this scandal. I need his name.”

“I-it is Adam Lambert.”

“Is there anything you are not telling me?”

“No.”

“OK. We need to play this off as not a big deal. You need to be the sweet loving husband that was totally confused by this guy’s aggressive overture. Have Katy come back so you two can be seen together and under no circumstance contact this Adam guy. I will do a little digging and make sure he doesn’t try and capitalize on this.”

“OK. You know Katy and I are considering a divorce.”

“Well, you better reconsider for a few months. Kris, we can use this publicity but many of your fans are conservative. They would not appreciate a gay adulterer and think how humiliating it would be for Katy and your family.”

Kris nodded. He didn’t want to hurt Katy or his family but he knew this was wrong. He hoped someday he could make it up to Adam.

“Get some sleep and I will come over tomorrow at eight and give you some prepared statements for your interview. Call Katy and have her come out here asap.”

Kris was starting to feel sick and just wanted to go to bed and sleep for a really long time. They arrived at his house and Kris waved Gina off. He went in and just collapsed on his bed.

+++

Adam finished his last set hoping the paparazzi would go away. After his last song he went by Brad and Cassidy.

“Kris Allen showed up and I walked him out and now there are a bunch of paparazzi outside.”

Brad looked at Adam, “Is Kris Allen still here? Why didn’t you introduce me?”

“Well, if you remember the last time I saw him he thought I was a whore so forgive me for not acting the part of a social director.”

“OK drama queen, so where is he now?”

“He ran away when the paparazzi showed up. Can I stay at your place tonight?”

“Fine, but I want a free massage.”

They gathered there stuff and walked out. Immediately, the cameras starting going off. Brad and Cassidy blocked the paparazzi mostly by posing but at least Adam was able to get in Brad’s car. They drove Cassidy home and then went to Brad’s apartment. Adam went up and crashed immediately. Adam woke up and saw Brad sitting at his computer.

“What time is it?”

“Time for you to get a new life, dear. Shit, Adam you are all over the fucking internet. You have gone viral, dude.”

Adam jumped up and ran by Brad’s computer and sure enough there were picture of him kissing Kris but mostly of Kris pushing him away. Adam looked at the headlines,

“Kris Allen gets attacked by a delusional fan”;   
“Kris Allen appeals to the gay men”;   
“Man tries to steal kisses from former Idol”

Adam started looking at the comments people made under the articles and was shocked by all the gay bashing, hate and meanness. He became nauseous.

Adam went in the bathroom and threw up. Brad called out, “Remember any publicity is good publicity.”

Adam went back out there, “I am going to lose my job. Everyone hates me and thinks I attacked an innocent, straight, married, Christian boy.”

Brad was still looking at the computer, “Relax, it isn’t all negative. Bob3000 says ‘I’d hit that once too’ and Mel10 says ‘that boy is pretty enough to be mistaken for a girl’. See glass half full, babe. As for your job…good. Speaking of which you owe me a massage.”

“I am not in the mood Brad.” Adam picked up his phone and saw he had 114 messages.

“He fucking kissed me,” Adam mumbled more to himself than Brad.

Brad still entertained by the internet was half listening, “What are you crying about?”

“I walked him outside and he kissed me. He. Kissed. Me! Then the flashes went off and he pushed me away and claimed he didn’t know me.”

“Wow, what a douche-bag. I knew his nice guy act was fake. No one is that sweet and naïve. He’s just a bitchy twink. No wonder you went for him, he is your type,” Brad smiled.

Adam just put his head in his hands. He felt Brad’s arms go around him, “It will blow over, babe. People have ADD with this stuff. One week of headlines tops. Stay off the internet for a couple days otherwise you will drive yourself insane. Besides, you do look hot in most of the pictures. I mean not the ones where your jaw is on the ground but the others. Your makeup was flawless and the outfit fierce.”

Adam looked at Brad and laughed. Times like these he could remember why he had dated him and they remained good friends. Adam showered and went to work straight from Brad’s apartment. Luckily, he still had some jeans there. He arrived and Eva gave him a dirty look,

“You cost me a very good client. Kris Allen’s publicist called and said he no longer needed our services. You better go see Linda.”

Adam went in by Linda. She did not even offer him a seat.

“I am very disappointed in you, Adam. You are not the type of person I like representing my spa. As a matter of fact, you should consider changing professions. Please don’t come back and your clients belong to the spa. Do not try to steal them or else I will make sure you never work in this town again. I am not going to give you a reference. Goodbye, Adam.”

Adam expected as much so did not even bother responding. He just walked out and went back to his apartment. His family had left several messages and his mother was waiting outside his apartment. She hugged him and Adam broke. They went inside and his mother spent the afternoon making him feel better. Adam didn’t tell her that Kris kissed him and just let her assume he had made a mistake. She had to meet a client at four and left Adam. At five his door bell rang and he answered it and saw a short brunette girl that looked tough.

“Adam Lambert?”

“Yes.”

“I am Gina Falco, Kris Allen’s publicist.”

“What do you want?”

“I want to talk to you. We have a very bad situation. Kris Allen is heterosexual and married. His image is based on him being a good guy and you damaged it. I don’t know why you tried to get him drunk and take advantage but it is what it is. Di you do it for money or publicity? You aren’t a stalker are you?”

Adam just stared at her blankly. She continued, “Look, the paparazzi are going to hound you and I need to know what you are going to tell them?”

“I am not going to even talk to them. Look, maybe you should be telling Kris Allen what to say, he is the pop star, not me.”

“He has already given an interview and explained you were just an overzealous fan that was confused. He admited it was a little scary but he assured everyone he was fine. He went on and said he thought you were a little drunk and had a good laugh with the interviewer. Kris has a good heart but he is naïve when it comes to manipulative people. I looked into your background and learned you are a struggling actor out of work and probably dying for the opportunity to get your name out here. I also saw quite a few risqué you tubes of you and it is clear you are loud and proud. Well, I hate to break it to you but you are being portrayed as a pervert and joke. Have you seen the internet recently?”

Adam was hurt by her words but remained calm, “No, I was busy losing my job over this scandal.”

“Well, too bad for you. If you talk to the media try and defame Kris, I will destroy what little credibility you might have. I suggest you keep a low profile.”

“Fuck you,” Adam could feel himself getting upset and wanted her to leave.

“Are you looking for money, Adam?”

“Get out and tell Kris Allen he can go fuck himself too.”


	6. Chapter 6

Empty. Kris should be grateful that everyone was buying the lies. Katy came immediately after Kris called and agreed to set their differences aside and make public appearances. In the few days that followed the unfortunate incident the media had dug up numerous youtubes and photos of Adam showing him kissing men, dressing in drag and performing some provocative songs. They also interviewed some people that witnessed Adam trying to get Kris drunk and making the pop-star uncomfortable. Kris also read that the spa Adam worked at had issued a statement saying that they had no idea Adam would stalk a client and that it had never happened before. Furthermore, they had let him go. Kris felt horrible. Adam had even become a joke to all the late night show hosts. Kris spoke to Gina.

“I feel really bad for this guy. He doesn’t deserve all this.”

“Kris, I met with him and he is just trying to figure out how to capitalize on this fame. Before this he was nobody and now everyone knows his name.”

“Yeah, but in a bad way. The guy really isn’t so bad.”

“You are just too nice a person. This will die down. Besides, this may be the best thing that ever happened to him.”

Kris was not sure Gina was right. He could not get Adam off his mind and needed to know if he was OK. Kris asked his security guard, Jake, to track down a number for him. A few hours later Jake produced a cell phone number. Jake was ex-CIA and Kris did not even want to know how he got the number. That night he and Katy went to a red carpet event and played the happy couple. Katy was still concerned,

“I hope that Lambert guy doesn’t come after you. Maybe that is why you got such a weird vibe off him when he gave you a massage. They say people know when something bad is going to happen. Besides, he looks creepy in some of his pictures.”

Kris couldn’t help but smile at Katy calling Adam creepy but then he remembered the situation and felt sad. Kris didn’t respond. The next day Katy went to spend the day shopping with some girlfriends. Kris called the number Jake gave him.

“Adam’s phone.”  
“Is Adam there?”

“Are you a tabloid?”

“No.”

“Who is this?”

Kris hesitated, “It is Kris Allen and I want to speak to Adam.”

“Is this Perez?”

Kris heard some fumbling around and then Adam’s voice,

“Hello.”

“Hello Adam, it’s Kris.”

“You gotta be fucking kidding me? What do you want?”

“I know you are mad-“

“Really? Why would I be mad? Just because I lost my job, became the nation’s biggest joke, and can’t go anywhere without some self-righteous prick calling me a pervert. No, Kris I am not mad I AM FUCKING PISSED.”

“I know. Please, calm down. I want to make it up to you. Can we meet and talk?”

“I don’t think that is a good idea.”

“Please, Adam. You don’t know how bad I feel about this. Please, I want to see you.”

He heard Adam sigh, “Where and when?” Kris heard someone in the background yelling.

“Can I come over to your apartment now?”

“No, there are paparazzi staking out at my apartment. Oh Yeah, add to the list I can’t go home either.” Adam paused and took a deep breath, “You can come to my friends place. It is safer.”

Kris was surprised by Adam’s thoughtfulness but maybe despite what Gina said, Adam didn’t want publicity. Especially, since he was getting such negative publicity. Kris knew a lot of it was hurtful and personal attacks against Adam.

“Thank you for agreeing to meet with me. I know this is more than I deserve.”

“You’re welcome. I am sure this will end up being the third biggest mistake of my life. Can you guess what the first two are? You were there.”

Kris too nervous Adam would change is mind just pressed on, “What is the address?”

Kris took down the address. He quickly got done and headed to West Hollywood. Kris had to take Jake but insisted he wait in the car while he visited his friend. He told Jake to make sure no paparazzi showed up and if they did to text him a warning. Kris took a deep breath and knocked on the door. A slim brown haired man answered. Kris recognized him from the other night and from pictures on the internet. Pictures of Adam and him kissing and acting like a couple. The guy snarled,

“You better not fuck with him more or I am going to kick your ass Mr. Pop-star-hiding-in-the-closet-dou-

“Brad! Let him in and give us some privacy.”

“It is my apartment.” Brad gave Kris a dirty look and faced Adam, “Fine, baby, but I won’t be far.” Brad walked out and slammed the door. Kris noticed the endearment and felt a pang of jealousy. He went over by Adam nervously. He noticed the dark circles under Adam’s eyes and felt guilty.

“Did you come hear to make sure I kept my mouth shut?” Adam just went to the couch and sat down.

“No, I came to apologize and see if there was anything I could do. I heard you lost your job. I could give you some money.”

Adam looked at Kris and then laughed, “I’m sorry did you just offer me money again? What is a ruined life worth to you? Ten, fifteen dollars? Or did you think maybe since I lost my job I would be more open to being a whore?”

Kris felt like he couldn’t win. “What do you want me to do?”

“Telling the truth would be a good start.”

“I know but I can’t. I know its lame but I’d be ruined and it would kill Katy.”

“Maybe you should of thought of that before coming to see me at the Upright. Remember, you came to me.”

“I know. I couldn’t stop myself. God help me I want you so bad. I have never wanted anyone so much in my life. I wish I had the courage to be honest but I don’t even know what I would tell the world. I have never been with a man besides you and I am married. It is killing me to hurt you like this.”

“Kris, I get it. To tell you the truth, I am not sure you coming clean to the world would help at this point. I’d still be seen as a husband stealer and the fag that turned you gay. It is my own damn fault because I know better than to screw with married men. Look, I saw the pictures from the VMAs. You and your wife look great together and seem happy. I will keep your secret free of charge.”

“What about us?”

“Us? There is no us. Don’t be a schmuck. I am being more than generous but even I am not that forgiving. Goodbye, Kris.”

+++

Adam could not believe what a bitch Kris’ publicist was. No wonder he was such a coward about ruining his image. Adam grabbed a beer from his fridge and turned on the T.V. He saw his face plastered on most of the channels. They had obtained pictures from his facebook and myspace which were provocative. At this point, Adam was getting desensitized to the situation and not all that embarrassed. He was who he was and if the world decided to hate him so be it. He was done wallowing in self pity and wanted to come up with an action plan. He needed to get a good night sleep and think on a clear head.

He woke up the next day to someone banging on his door. He answered it and saw Brad standing on his doorstep carrying a bag of Krispy Cremes.

“I figured you would want to binge eat and hate yourself more.”

Adam laughed and hugged Brad, “Actually I am feeling better. You know I got out of entertainment because I was tired of rejection but now that the worst has happened I feel like I have nothing to lose so I want to get back into it.”

“Good, because I think you could probably sell your story to some tabloids and get a gig on a reality TV show. I mean your way too gay for Survivor but if you eat enough donuts we can try and get you on The Biggest Loser…”

“I was thinking more along the lines of putting a band together or doing more club shows. Maybe I should rehire my agent.”

“Your agent sucked. You need to capitalize on your fame. You could have a show where every week you seduce a new straight guy and become America’s favorite queen and the first episode can be Kris Allen.”

“Funny. Seriously, Brad, you cannot tell anyone what really happened. Please, I know what he did to me was mean but I don’t want to hurt the guy or destroy his marriage.”

Brad looked at Adam and shook his head, “You fucking idiot, you still like the guy. He threw you to the wolves, Adam and lied to make himself look good. He made you lose your job and become the latest water cooler joke. How could you still like him? It is downright embarrassing. That would be as bad as you taking me back. But if you are going to stoop that low, I’m down for a courtesy fuck.”

“Shut up, Brad. I don’t like him but I don’t hate him. And for the record, I don’t think I could ever be pathetic enough to take you back.”

Brad feigned being wounded, “That hurts. Still, why do you think you owe this guy anything?”

“Nothing good comes from spreading negativity. I’m not into that and I’d rather focus on getting my life on track rather than pulling someone else down. Maybe, you were right about this being a blessing in disguise.”

“I am always right but don’t get too carried away with that half full shit. You are still public enemy number one and a sexual deviant to most of America. Do you want to stay at my place until the paparazzi get bored?”

“Yes. Thanks, Brad. You are a good friend.”

“Can I have benefits?”

Adam laughed, “No. Help me pack.”

They battled the paparazzi but lost them before they got to Brad’s apartment. Adam relaxed and was reading the LA weekly on the couch. His cell went off and Brad answered it. Brad was being Brad so Adam just grabbed the phone and was shocked to hear Kris Allen’s southern twang. For all his positive talk he felt the anger rising and could not resist lashing out. He was even more shocked when he heard himself agree to meet with Kris. Brad was furious and warned Adam it was a set up. Adam just felt numb but needed some kind of closure.

Adam waited and ignored Brad being bitchy. He wasn’t sure what Kris wanted and why he would take a chance seeing him. Brad seemed to think Kris was nervous Adam would spill about his getting a blow job. Kris came in and Adam was annoyed that the first thing he noted was how good looking Kris was in person. The last thing Adam needed to do was think with his cock. Focus! Never one to beat around the bush, Adam asked him straight up if he came to keep him quiet. Adam was listening to the expected apologies but then stiffened. Did he just treat me like a whore, yet again? Maybe Brad was right and he was just a douche bag.

“I’m sorry did you just offer me money again? What is a ruined life worth to you? Ten, fifteen dollars? Or did you think maybe since I lost my job I would be more open to being a whore?”

Adam was furious and Kris was fanning the flames. Adam watched as Kris’ demeanor changed and the guy really seemed pathetic and remorseful. Adam was terrible at holding grudges and found himself cutting Kris slack. Part of him really did understand that not everyone understood their own preferences and the guy was married. Adam gave him a break and decided to take the high road. Adam’s anger had subsided until…Us? Did he really go there? He is not a douche he is a retard.

“Us? There is no us. Don’t be a schmuck. I am being more than generous to you but even I am not that forgiving. Goodbye, Kris.”

Kris looked down. “Katy and I were separated and planning on getting divorced. I wasn’t just trying to have a fling behind her back.”

Well that was interesting. Focus! “Well, you look like you are together now.”

“Gina recommended we hold off a few months because of the scandal. Katy and I are best friends so she agreed to pretend we were still together.”

“Best friends? Did you tell her the truth?”

Kris looked down, “No, I didn’t want to hurt her.”

“So along with being a shitty husband and a crappy fling, you are a lousy friend. You should go into acting because you have fooled America into believing you are a nice guy and clearly you are not.”

Kris looked crestfallen and Adam was glad, “You are right, I am not a nice guy and not very honest. Are you sure there is nothing I can do for you?”

Adam laughed, “What could you possibly do for me?”

Kris looked at Adam suggestively, “I could make you feel good.”

Adam should beat the shit out of Kris Allen. Adam should throw Kris Allen out on his ass. Adam should tell his cock to settle down. A horny Adam was a bad Adam and this was going to be a catastrophic error.

“Really? How good?”


	7. Chapter 7

Desire. Why did this man have such a devastating effect on Kris that he constantly threw good judgment out the window? Since when does Kris Allen suggest sex to men?

Adam had bit, “Really? How good?”

Kris was staring into Adams’s sultry eyes. He hesitated for a moment because really he had no clue how to be gay and sexy; at least not without looking retarded. He knew what Katy liked but that wasn’t much help in this situation.

Kris gave way to a self-conscious giggle, “I don’t know but I am very open to your suggestions.”

Adam quirked an eyebrow, “Mm. I can work with that. You can start by kissing me.”

Kris could follow instructions so immediately placed his lips on Adam’s mouth. Adam took control of the kiss and deepened it. Kris felt the same electricity he had felt the first time they kissed. Adam was really just way too good a kisser for his own good. Kris felt his knees weaken and was grateful that Adam was holding him so tight.

“We need to go somewhere else.” Adam tongued his ear, “Brad is probably right outside the door and he is not above voyeurism. Anywhere we can go where there is no chance of being caught?”

Kris would have gone anywhere to be with him, “We can go to my house. Katy is out for the whole day and Jake can drive into my grounds up to my door bypassing any paparazzi. Afterwards, he can discretely drop you off here. Jake will never tell a soul.”

“I am not sure how good an idea that is because all my blood has gone to my other head but I will go along with your plan.”

They were able to sneak past a texting Brad and climbed in the back of Kris’ town car. Jake did not say anything and just followed Kris’ instructions to go back to his house. They arrived at his house and went inside. After the drive, Kris was a little less horny and a lot more nervous.

Adam grabbed his hand as they got inside and pulled him into a kiss. Kris relaxed into Adam’s arms and pulled him into a guest room that they never used. Once inside, they both became frantic with desire and ripped each other’s clothes off.

Kris looked at Adam’s erect cock and immediately got intimidated. That was definitely not the model to use for a first time. Kris was going to have to figure out another way to make Adam feel good. Considering Kris had never done a thing for Adam, he might be satisfied with a simple hand job. Kris was thankful he had kept the bar so low.

“Suck me, Kris.” Uh-oh, a little higher than Kris had anticipated and sort of big leap into gayland. Kris looked at Adam’s pleading eyes and pushed his nerves aside. He wasn’t sure he could ever say no to that look even if he had wanted to. Plus, Kris really wanted to make Adam feel good after all the bad stuff.

Kris went down on his knees and tentatively ran his tongue over the head of Adam’s large cock. Not too bad. He found himself wanting to taste more of Adam. He had always thought it would be gross but he was getting turned on by Adam’s musky, masculine scent. Kris tried to remember some of the techniques Adam used but Adam’s size and his own gag reflex severely constrained his repertoire. He used his hand on the base of Adam’s shaft to bridge the difference between his lips and the base of Adam’s cock. Adam placed his hands on the back of Kris’ head, gently encouraging him with massaging fingers. Kris was thankful that Adam restrained from pulling his head or thrusting into his mouth. Kris liked giving Adam pleasure and liked how appreciative Adam seemed to be. Kris thought it was cute that Adam was even an incessant talker during sex. He constantly gave Kris encouraging words and guidance.

“Feels good…Yeah…Kris…th-that’s perfect…again…faster..slower…Kris…more…ooohhh…baby…just like that…fuck yeah…Kris, Kris, Kriiiisss”

Adam tapped Kris on the back of the head,

“I am close…I am going to come…you might want to finish with just your hands so I don’t cum in your mouth.”

Going for the gold, Kris didn’t switch and continued to use his mouth. He held Adam’s hips so he came in his mouth. Kris swallowed and was surprised it didn’t taste bad and was sort of a turn on. Adam seemed surprised too,

“You should have switched, you don’t even know if I am clean.”

Kris felt stupid and pissed that his gesture went so unappreciated, “You didn’t when you blew me.”

Adam shrugged, “You’re a fairly monogamous heterosexual but you’re right I shouldn’t have either. For the record, I am clean. I am just slutty around cute pop-stars.” Adam pecked him on the nose.

Adam got up and grabbed a towel from the bathroom and gave it to Kris. Kris wiped his hands. Adam sat on the bed and pulled Kris next to him. Adam started kissing him and stroking his cock. Kris kissed him back wondering if Adam could taste himself. Kris appreciated that Adam was returning the favor and realized just how rude it was that he didn’t the last time.

Adam was mumbling endearments as he lovingly stoked Kris toward a climax. It seemed very intimate and felt like they had been long term lovers. Adam had an open, inviting manner that extended to the bedroom. Kris came while kissing Adam deeply. He was happy and surprised that it felt so natural to be with Adam. Kris was usually pretty nervous when it came to sex. It had taken him months to get comfortable around Katy and once he was with Katy there had been no else since Adam. Before Katy there had been other women but that had been awkward too. Either he was really gay or Adam was the perfect partner for him.

+++

Kris fucking Allen is sucking my cock. Am I dead and in heaven? That was the last coherent thought Adam had until after he came. Kris Allen was a natural at sucking cock. Adam knew this was going to be one of those moments he would remember well into old age even after he became to senile to remember what penises were even for. Adam laid down and pulled Kris into bed with him. Kris fit perfectly against him and made Adam feel whole. It had been a long time since he liked someone so much and almost wished it was someone other than Kris Allen. Only an idiot falls for a closeted, married, pop-star that runs away when things get difficult; not the makings of a lasting partner.

Adam couldn’t keep his hands off Kris and remembered how responsive Kris was to his touch. Adam stroked him until he came and it was beautiful. Afterwards, he hugged Kris close and they fell into a light sleep. Adam awoke first and gently extricated himself without waking Kris. He quietly exited the room. As he was walking down the hall, he heard a footstep behind him and turned expecting to see Kris. He saw a glimpse of blonde hair and suddenly everything went black.

Adam awoke to the sound of talking and saw a security guard and Kris’ wife above him. The woman spoke,

“He’s coming around. I know who you are and I have already called the police. Why are you stalking my husband?”

Was he having a nightmare? “Where is Kris?”

“He is not home. What are you doing in my house? Did you break in to attack him or molest him again? I knew Kris should have pressed charges.”

Adam sat up and felt the a big bump on his head and looked at Kris’ wife Katy, “I just want to leave. I think I have a concussion.”

The security guard pulled Adam to his feet, “You aren’t going anywhere. How did you get in here?”

Another security guard came in with two police officers.

“I am Officer Geller, what seems to be the problem.”

“This man is stalking my husband and now he has broken into our house. I think he might have done something in the guest bedroom. He has already tried to molest Kris once before.”

“Yeah, I saw his picture on the TV. Pathetic. You should have requested a restraining order.”

Adam looked around and again asked, “Where is Kris?”

Officer Geller shook his head, “You are not going to meet him today. You can’t go breaking into celebrities’ homes and expecting them to welcome you. Are you on drugs?”

“Kris!” Adam was getting scared because this was not going to end well and he was way too pretty for jail.

Katy glared at Adam, “Luckily, my husband is not around.”

Adam just rolled his eyes assuming Kris was hiding and leaving him to face the consequences alone. He mumbled, “How convenient.”

Kris came out of a room further down the hall in his jeans and looking like he just woke up. Adam looked at Kris who seemed to be attempting to decipher what was going on. Adam hoped Kris would speak up for him and tell the police to leave.

Officer Geller looked at Kris, “Lucky for you Mr. Allen that you stayed asleep. Your wife called us because this man seems to have trespassed-“

“Omigod, you again! Officers this man needs to be arrested he is terrorizing my client and has a history of stalking him,” Gina had arrived which was creating more chaos and pissing off the police.

“And who exactly are you, miss?”

“I am Gina Falco, Mr. Allen’s publicist.” She looked at Adam, “You really are mental, aren’t you? You have gone too far this will not help your career. No one likes a stalker. I know what sells and that doesn’t sell. Officer, can you just please take statements and take him out of here. My client has a TV appearance in the morning.”

Adam was getting agitated and wanted to shake Kris to make him explain. The police seemed to notice Adam was getting excited,

“We will take him down to the station and send someone back here to get your statements. I am not sure he is stable,” Officer Geller explained. “Please don’t disturb the crime scene we may need DNA evidence if he sullied the room,” he said with disgust.

Kris seemed to react to the last statement, “Officers I am sure you have better things to do. I can have my security escort Mr. Lambert out. I don’t think we should create a big scene here.”

Katy looked at Kris, “What! Kris, he broke into our house and probably jerked off in one of our beds. He needs to be arrested and then we need a restraining order.”

“Katy, we can have the room cleaned. I don’t want another tabloid mess.”

“Kris, he scares me. He is demented and I want a restraining order so he stays away from you.”

Adam blood boiled when he heard Kris going along with the misconception. And to think his wife was calling him demented. Adam turned to Katy,

“Instead of a restraining order, why don’t you just get a leash for your fucking husband.”

“Watch it, Lambert. You need to stay calm,” Officer Geller snarled at him.

Adam then looked at Kris, “You really are a piece of work. You are just going to stand there and let them arrest me?” Adam tried to storm out of the house but was restrained by the two police officers. There interference ruined the effect he was going for and worse prevented him from leaving.

Kris looked on obviously unwilling to really help. Adam heard him say quietly, “He wants to leave let’s just let him go peacefully.”

Adam lost it, “Fuck you, Kris Allen, is that all you are going to say? You are lucky these guys are holding me otherwise I’d kick your ass, you fucking pussy.”

Adam quickly realized that was not the best choice of words to use in front of the police. The officers threw him to the ground and cuffed him. They hauled him outside like a criminal. Adam became aware of all the paparazzi swarming around the police car and knew there would not be flattering pictures. Adam was thankful he had pulled on his pants before leaving the room but wished he had grabbed his shirt and fixed his hair. As they shoved him in the backseat, he could almost hear the music…

"bad boys, bad boys,  
whatcha gonna do,  
whatcha gonna do   
when they come for you…"


	8. Chapter 8

Anguish. Kris was astounded as he watched them haul a very angry Adam out of his house. Kris followed and yelled after the police and yelled he did not want to press charges. Too little, too late. After the cops put Adam in the car, they came back to the porch. Kris could see the flashes going off around the cop car.

“Mr. Allen, I know this is very disturbing and inconvenient but he could be dangerous. We will send someone back here in the morning to take your statements and document the damage to your house. We can hold him for twenty four hours and this is more than enough to get a restraining order.”

Kris wanted to speak up but…Katy jumped in,

“Thank you officer, I feel better knowing he will be kept overnight.”

Kris looked up, “He is going to be in jail? I really don’t think he meant any harm. I don’t want to press charges.”

“Think about it overnight. As a matter of protocol we need to take him in and I suggest you look into better security. Don’t worry we will get to the bottom of this. We will send someone first thing in the morning.”

Kris watched powerlessly as the police left. He wanted to speak up but now with the police, media and everything what could he do. Katy and Gina were heading toward the guest bedroom. Kris stopped them,

“It is probably a mess let’s leave it.”

“I need to see it.” Katy went in the room, “Omigod, he had your shirt, Kris. He was probably rubbing it on himself. He is disgusting.”

Kris felt very small and mumbled softly, “Katy, leave it alone. Gina, I am exhausted and have that TV performance to do in the morning.”

“OK, get some sleep Kris. I will come up with a media statement and give it to you in the morning.”

Gina left still concerned. Katy broke down and started crying. Kris hugged her and just listened to her cry for a half hour feeling horrible. She finally regained control and went into the kitchen. Kris took that opportunity to call Jake,

“Jake, I am sorry to call you up after your shift but the police came and thought Adam had broke in. I need you to go to the police station and try to help Adam. Can you tell them you let him in?”

“Mr. Allen, I am not going to lie to the police.”

“Can you go down and make sure he is OK and see if we can post bail? They are keeping him overnight.”

“Why didn’t you just say you invited him over to set him straight or something? This seems like a rather extreme cover up.”

“I know. I am an idiot.”

Jake just sighed, “I’ll try give you a call when I know something.”

Kris went into the kitchen. Katy was pouring tea,

“Do you want a cup?”

“Yes, please. I think we need to talk.”

+++

Adam was slowly coming to his senses between the shock of being arrested and after effects of getting whacked in the head. He realized one of the officers was speaking to him,

“You have the right to remain silent….”

Adam just tuned him out and again prayed California would be swallowed up by the earth. They arrived at the police station. He was shown in and taken into a room. There were three police officers in the room which made Adam nervous. The youngest, a dark haired muscular type spoke,

“Adam, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Adam, I am Officer Panzelli, I am going to search you for weapons and paraphernalia. The other officers are here to ensure you don’t cause trouble. Are you on any drugs or in possession of illegal substances?”

Adam was grateful he had nothing and started to realize the full implication of his situation and how cruel Kris was for abandoning him yet again. This was worse than being left in an alleyway with paparazzi. Adam was getting pissed again.

“No, Officer. I don’t have anything.”

“OK, Adam. Just relax I am going to take off your hand cuff and have you face the wall. Put your hands on the wall and spread your legs.”

Adam prayed this would not be a strip search. Due to his recent infamy, Adam was pretty sure these guys knew he was gay and He knew after the media frenzy these cops knew he was gay. Although Adam rarely showed fear about his orientation, in the back of his mind it lingered. He knew friend that had been the victim of gay bashing and knew most cops were not exactly gay-friendly.

One of the other cops laughed,

“Bet he gets turned on by this. Fags always have these kind of fantasies.”

Adam froze and his heart started to race. Officer Panzelli had already taken off the cuffs and put a hand on Adam’s arm,

“It is OK, Adam. Officer Miller is just being stupid. No one is going to hurt you if you behave. Please put your hands on the wall.”

“Don’t call me stupid, rookie. What are you sweet on the guy?”

Officer Panzelli seemed to get angry which made Adam nervous.

“Miller, I am not going to lose my badge because you feel the need to express your homophobia. If you can’t be professional than I’d rather you left. I’ll take my chances with him behaving.”

“What do you want some privacy so you can fuck your new boyfriend? Give it to him real hard?”

“Smitty, if you let your partner continue like this, I am going to report you both. This is the shit that gets internal affairs hot and heavy.”

Adam stood there feeling vulnerable and then felt Officer Panzelli patting him down. Adam, just let him empty his pockets.

“We will have to confiscate these items but will give them back to you when you are released. Officer Smith is going to inventory your items. Have a seat.”

Adam sat down in the chair the officer gestured towards. Adam wished his pockets had been empty but at least he had nothing illegal. Officer Smith began reciting the items while Panzelli wrote them down,

“Let’s see three condoms, two tubes of…lubricating oil, breath mints, fifteen dollars, keys, eyeliner, chapstick…” The officer was stumped by Adam’s compact face powder. Adam enlightened him,

“It is powder foundation.”

Officer Smith nodded, “Thanks. That’s it. Sign the sheet Officer Panzelli filled out.”

Adam signed the inventory.

“OK, Adam I am going to fingerprint you and then take your photo. After that we can talk and you can make a phone-call,” Officer Panzelli guided Adam out of the room leaving the other two cops behind.

Adam let out a sigh of relief, “Thank you for being professional.”

“I am sorry they weren’t. I am going to report Miller. I will be handling the rest of your processing so you shouldn’t have any more problems.”

Adam was still scared, “Am I going to be put in jail?”

“You are going to be put in a holding cell once we finish processing until you can post bail.”

Adam was finger printed and then taken for his mug shot. Adam knew from watching enough E! he should try and make it look good. Adam gave the camera one of his sexy, smirks. Officer Panzelli laughed,

“Nice picture. Do you want to make a statement?”

Adam looked at the Officer not sure what to do.

Panzelli looked at him sympathetically, “Do you have someone you can call?”

Adam nodded.

Officer Panzelli smiled, “Make a call first.”

Adam knew if he called his mother or father they would freak out. Even though they would find out, Adam decided to call Brad.

“Hello, Bradley Bell speaking.”

“Brad, its Adam. I need your help. I am in jail.”

“Jail? What did that cocksucker do now?”

“They arrested me for breaking and entering his house. He let them take me away. I am scared Brad.”

“I am going to kick that fucker’s ass. Alright, don’t speak to anyone. Make sure you smile for your mug shot because it’s going to go viral. Bad enough you get a criminal record but at least look good while doing it. I’ll be there as soon as possible. Oh, don’t pick up any soap.”

Adam smiled and hung up. He went back by Officer Panzelli.

“OK, Adam, I am going to take you to a holding cell. It is a quiet night so there is only one other man in there and he is harmless. I will come and check on you so nothing happens. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure. Off the record?”

“Yeah. Why Kris Allen? I could see Justin Timberlake but Kris Allen. I just don’t get it.”

Adam laughed, “Me neither.”

Adam sat in the cell hoping his intoxicated cell mate would ignore him. No such luck as the older man looked at him,

“Hey, you are Adam Lambert. Saw you on the news. Hey son, my daughter has a crush on Kris Allen too but even at 13 she knows the difference between fantasy and reality.”

Adam wondered if the night could get any worse than getting advice from a drunk, middle aged father figure. Adam was relieved after a few minutes of inane chatter, the man passed out. Officer Panzelli came back down a half hour later.

“Good news. Your friend, Brad is here and he is posting your bail. We were supposed to keep you all night but your friend charmed the judge to let you out. Is he your boyfriend?”

“No.”

“Do you mind if I ask him out?”

Adam laughed, “Leave it to Brad to optimize any situation. In what twenty minutes, he secured not only an early release for me but a date for himself. Have at it but it is only fair to warn you he is a heart breaker.”

Officer Panzelli smiled, “So am I. Come on and lets get you out processed.”

Adam went upstairs and saw Brad looking at home sitting on one of the officer’s desks playing with his cell phone.

Brad looked at Adam, “Oh geez, you took a mug shot with that hair? Didn’t I warn you?”

“Thanks for coming down.”

“No thank you,” Brad winked at Officer Panzelli. “Anyway, you have to come back in two days for an arraignment. Now come on I am missing Gossip Girl.”

Officer Panzelli uncuffed Adam’s hands and handed him back his possessions. Brad jumped down from the desk and smiled at Officer Panzelli,

“Call me.” Brad turned to Adam, “Come on, thug. Is it too soon to tell you I told you so?”

“Much too soon.”

They walked out of the station and Adam saw Jake sitting on Kris’ town car. Jake seemed surprised to see Adam. He came over.

“They told me you wouldn’t be released until morning.”

“Where is Kris?”

“He is at home. He sent me to try and help.”

“I guess just like your boss, you really aren’t much of a help.”

Brad became angry, “That fucker better never get near Adam again or I am going to kick his ass.”

Jake laughed, “You don’t strike me as much of a threat.”

“Yeah, well I am because I fight dirty. I can cat fight like the best of them so he just better watch it.”

Adam bit his lip to not laugh, “Jake, tell Kris he better drop the charges or else I am going to the media.”

Jake nodded, “I will let him know.”

Adam and Brad saw some paparazzi headed towards them and quickly jumped in Brad’s car and headed back to his apartment. Once inside, Brad went to his makeshift bar and made two vodka martinis. He handed one to Adam,

“OK fucker, what happened? I hate to be judgmental but this relationship is not going well and seems a bit toxic. What’s on the agenda for your fourth date, you getting crippled?”

“I know believe me it is over.” The stress of past few hours hit Adam and he broke down, “Brad, he let me get arrested. How could he do that? I would never.”

Brad hugged Adam, “Because he is a douche-bag. Adam, you don’t deserve any of this and he is a bastard for putting you through it. You are so talented and amazing. Don’t worry the charges will get dropped. You need to stay away from that guy. He is not good for you and frankly it’s scaring me. Don’t make me do an intervention.”

“I promise, no more Kris Allen.”

“I hope that isn’t like an addict’s promise. Anyway, at least I got a date out of the whole thing. Men in uniform love me.”

“Well, that’s good because between digesting my joblessness and prison time I was worried about your social calendar.”

“Fuck you. Just remember who bailed your ass out. By the way, call your Mom and Dad because your arrest is all over the news. Sorry, but you look pretty bad getting shoved in a police car.”

Adam cringed, “What are they saying?”

“Same as before just to a new level. Your obsession has resulted in you getting arrested and also claiming you jacked off in their house which is frankly a bit of a turn off. Did you jack off?”

“No, he gave me a blow job. I hate being seen as a sexual deviant.”

“Well, it could be worse at least he isn’t underage. Now you’re just a loser if he were a kid forget about it. Who cares? I have incredible news. Remember, the audition we went to three months ago for that glamrock show? They got the backing and still want us.”

“Even after my arrest?”

Brad thought for a minute, “I don’t know they were OK with your stalking habits because I told them it wouldn’t get in the way of rehearsals. So I think as long as you don’t go to jail it should be OK. The producer loves you and seemed to thing your media attention might help the show. You know drum up interest in seeing the freak.”

Adam just stared at Brad.

“Lighten up, precious.” Brad kissed him on the lips. Adam felt vulnerable and kissed him long. Brad pulled back,

“You would kill me tomorrow if I let that go on. But, if you still want to after you get your head together I am all yours.”

Adam smiled, “I still love you, Brad.”

“You will always love me, Adam because I am fabulous. But, for the record, I still love you too. Do you think that cop will call me? He was fucking hot.”

Adam rolled his eyes and proceeded to deal with his parents.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclosure. Kris accepted the cup of tea from Katy and sat down. Katy sat across from him concerned. Kris took a deep breath,

“I need to tell you something and I am really scared you will hate me if I do.”

“Kris, I love you and could never hate you. I know our marriage didn’t work out but we best friends so you can tell me anything.”

Kris was having difficulty breathing.

“Did he hurt you, Kris? Did he try to…”

Kris looked at Katy, “No. This situation is so out of control.”

“I know sweetie but we will get a restraining order and he won’t be allowed near you. He is a sick man.”

“No, it’s not like that.”

Katy stiffened, “What are you talking about? What is not like that?”

Kris started to hyperventilate.

Katy became nervous. “Kris, calm down. Just tell me what is wrong.”

“Adam didn’t break into the house, I took him here.”

Katy looked at Kris strangely, “Why would you take a stalker here?”

Kris was holding back tears, “I lied.”

“What do you mean you lied?”

“I lied about everything. I went to the club to see him that night and kissed him outside. The paparazzi swarmed us and I panicked. After everything went crazy I had Jake track him down and get me his number. I called him and went to see him to apologize. I asked him to come back here and we fell asleep. He must have gone out of the room and that is when you hit him. I didn’t know what to say.”

Katy was staring at Kris in shock and then slapped him across the face twice. “How could you?”

“We were getting divorced and I just found him attractive.”

Katy became even angry, “You think I’m this mad because you cheated?”

“Is it because I might be gay?”

“Kristopher, I don’t give a flying fuck if you slept around with every man in the country. How could you strand by and watch an innocent man be persecuted just to save face?”

“I didn’t want to humiliate you and I didn’t want the world to think I was gay when I’m not even sure I am. Plus, we are still married and its adultery.”

“You should have thought about that before you did anything. Kris, the guy had been publicly humiliated, lost his job and is now sitting in jail and you are worried about your image. You make me sick. You are not the man I thought you were. I want a divorce immediately. I suggest you and Gina figure out how you are going to straighten this out. Did you sleep with him?”

“No, we just fooled around.”

“Why didn’t he tell the media the truth?”

“I don’t know maybe he didn’t think they would listen.”

Katy shook her head, “I feel terrible that I hit him. We have to go to the police and make sure they release him.”

“I sent Jake to help him. When the police come in the morning we will tell them it was a misunderstand and have the charges dropped.”

“What about clearing his name?”

“I will talk to Gina. Katy there is a lot at stake here.”

“I never thought I’d see the day when you became a complete sell out but I guess I was wrong. Goodnight, Kris. I hope you sleep well knowing your friend is in jail because you are too much of a coward to be honest.” Katy went upstairs.

The next morning Gina arrived at seven. Kris had tossed and turned all night. He finally got a call from Jake saying Adam was released and had left with a friend. Kris was happy he didn’t have to spend the night in jail.

“I think you should just say that Mr. Lambert is a disturbed individual and the police are taking care of everything and you are more than satisfied that they will keep you safe.”

Kris looked at Gina, “He is not disturbed. I led him on and I brought him here yesterday.”

Gina’s jaw dropped, “You took a man stalking you to your home?”

“He wasn’t stalking me. A few weeks ago he came over to give me a massage when my usual masseuse was busy. We flirted and one thing led to another. I freaked out and he left. I heard he was performing at the club and went there to see him. The paparazzi caught us kissing and I pretended he was molesting me but it wasn’t like that.”

“Shit, shit, shit! Kris, you can’t come out with this. If you admitted to being gay, you would lose some fans but if you admit to lying to the world you will lose all your fans.”

“What about Adam?”

“Don’t worry we can make things right without being honest. I will go talk to him and see if we can buy his silence. He doesn’t have a job and wants to make it in the entertainment industry. We can make it so he benefits too. Trust me.”

Kris was a little apprehensive letting Gina handle the situation but that is what he paid her to do.

“What should I say on GMA if they ask about last night.”

“Say, you can say there was a big misunderstanding and it was not that big of a deal. You can’t go into details for legal reasons. End of story. The story should die down. Whatever you do, DO NOT SAY YOU LIED or anything specific about Adam.”

“OK.” Kris saw Katy looking at him and shaking her head. Kris felt two feet tall. He just hoped Adam would understand and accept some form of compensation. He wasn’t dumb enough to hope Adam would forgive him and certainly didn’t think he would ever get the chance to be with him again. That made Kris sad, sadder than he could ever remember feeling.

+++

Adam pacified his parents by insisting he was OK and treated well in jail. He didn’t mention the incident with the two homophobic cops and told them not to speak to media. Brad and he finally fell asleep at four in the morning which made Adam angry when Brad jumped on him the next day. Adam groaned,

“Brad, I had a long night why are you waking me. I am pretty sure I don’t want to get up and face the day.”

“Sweetheart, today is a good day. I have good and gooder news. First, Joey Panzelli called me and wants to take me to dinner. Second, the charges were dropped. You are a free man.”

Adam sat up relieved, “Thank god. I knew he would drop the charges and would-“

“STOP IT. Adam, he dropped the charges because he was scared you would talk. Don’t you dare forgive him. That fucker was just on GMA and once again failed to tell the truth that would exonerate you. He said there was a misunderstanding and he could not go into it for legal reasons. He doesn’t give a shit about you, babe.”

Adam looked crestfallen, “That is all he said?”

“Exactly, so you still are public pervert number one. You are the freak that jacks off in celebrity houses. The minute you start thinking nice thoughts about Kris Allen, go online and checkout all the negative press you are getting.”

“This sucks.”

“Uh-huh, but your mug shot turned out better than I expected. Perez Hilton put it on his blog and said as far as psychos go you were one of the best looking around. He even offered to be your next prey. He also thought the proof of your insanity was going to these lengths for Kris Allen. Sometimes I love Perez.”

“Great I am a hot psycho. Do I need to go to the police station?”

“Nah, Joey said he’d come by with some paperwork and that would be the end of it. Your getting busted may end up being the best thing that ever happened to me. Your life sucks but I think I am going to get laid. Now go get dressed, beautiful, we have to meet with Dave and Carmen about this glamshow. Try to curb your stalker tendencies.”

Adam got dressed and went with Brad to the meet Dave and Carmen. He dressed down and wore a baseball cap and large glasses. Brad laughed,

“Now you really look like a celebrity. Come on, my fashion-less superstar.”

They arrived at the restaurant and sat down at a table with the two producers. After explaining the charges against him were dropped and assuring them he was done stalking, they discussed the show. They were still casting and would probably begin rehearsals in a couple months. Adam was thankful they were still offering him a part but worried about rent and his car payments which were due in less than a week. Unfortunately, he had upgraded his life when he started working at the Spa assuming he had a safe, consistent source of income. Now he was in debt. They left the restaurant and went to Adam’s apartment. There were some paparazzi but Adam just ignored them.

The doorbell rang an hour later and Adam reluctantly let Gina in. Chickenshit Kris had sent his henchwoman to deal with him. Brad was snarling at her.

“I am not going to waste your time with niceties. Kris sent me to deal with you. I must admit I am impressed, you have managed to corrupt one of the most level headed, straight as an arrow, married man I know. I am sorry you have had to deal with so much craziness but any publicity is good publicity, right Adam.”

“Well, I am not sure being called a pervert, adulterer, and psycho are image enhancers. What is you point, Gina?”

“You’re right and you need this media to subside. The best way is to keep quiet. You lost your job and probably will struggle finding one for a few months. I am prepared to offer you substantial money to keep you quiet.”

Brad became angry, “You expect Adam to continue to let everyone think he is a freak lusting after a pathetic, talent-less, closet case?”

“Yes, Kris has dropped the charges and will say nothing more about the incident either. He will simply say that it has been handled to his satisfaction and there is no longer any problems between you two. You in turn, will not discuss anything about your interactions with Kris. It is all spelled out in this gag order contract.”

“What does Adam get?”

“Money.” Gina turned to Adam, “If you sign this I will give you ten thousand dollars.”

Brad snorted, “Adam is not an idiot and neither am I. His silence is worth a lot more than that. In fact it is worth double. He wants twenty thousand.”

“That is a lot of money. Is that your final offer, Adam?”

Adam didn’t want to be paid off but his rent was due and so was his car payment. More importantly, the Burning Man Festival was five days away and this would allow him to go. Brad and he had lamented about missing it since Brad was broke too. He looked at Brad who was busy reading the contract and acting like a street lawyer.

Gina ignored Brad and turned to Adam, “If you break this contract and speak about the incident you will be taken to court. You also need to stay away from Kris.”

“Is court worse than jail?” Adam asked rhetorically. “I am going to sign as long as this means Kris Allen will stay away from me.”

Gina nodded, “Kris will not come near you. He and his wife are working through their issues. He wants to move on with his life and forget about his transgression.”

Adam didn’t like being referred to as a transgression and was also hurt Kris had sent Gina to “deal” with him like he was a pest. Adam had a gnawing suspicion that he shouldn’t sign without a lawyer looking at it. But, Burning Man was calling and he didn’t know any lawyers. Adam looked at Brad,

“If I sign we can go to Burning Man on Friday and I can clear some of my debts.”

“Babe, I know about these things and this is a good deal. I don’t see anything out of the ordinary in this contract.”

Adam hoped Brad was as smart as he pretended to be and signed the contract. Gina handed him a check for twenty thousand dollars and warned,

“You violate this contract and speak to anyone about its existence or your relations with Kris Allen and I will destroy you. I will go after you and make sure you never work in this town again and any money you make I will get for damages. This contract says if you violate any part of it you will pay Kris Allen $250,000 in damages.”

Adam looked at Brad angrily. Brad grimaced,

“I’m not a lawyer, Babe, I didn’t see that part. You weren’t gonna talk anyway and we are going to Burning Man, its destiny. Twenty thousand dollars is a lot of money.”

Gina left. Brad jumped on Adam’s lap.

“See, Babe, everything worked out perfectly.” Brad kissed Adam short on the lips. Adam could feel the sexual tension between them and kissed Brad deeply. Brad responded enthusiastically and looked at Adam lustfully and lovingly, “Really? You want me again?”

Adam stood up and unceremoniously dropped Brad on his ass, “No, not really. Don’t you have a date soon?”

“You are a cocktease, Adam Lambert.” Brad rubbed his ass and Adam laughed. Adam’s cell went off and Adam answered,

“Hello.”

“Adam Lambert, this is Marty Wells and I work for the enquirer. I am willing to offer you fifty thousand dollars for an exclusive interview.”

Adam glared at Brad, “I am sorry but I cannot talk about the incident. There is no story.” Fuck, screwed again.


	10. Chapter 10

Bitterness. Kris returned back to his house after performing on GMA. He had been bombarded by questions but Gina helped him stick to the no comment/under investigation excuse. Kris’ lawyer dealt with the police and reiterated that Kris needed to keep silent and avoid contact with Adam. Kris’ lawyer also drafted a compensation package for Adam and Gina had gone to see Adam with the offer. Kris did not know the details of the package but Gina assured him it was more than generous. Katy was giving him a cold shoulder so Kris decided to just catch up on email. Of course, he ended up surfing the net. He wasn’t surprised that he was still getting a lot of hits. The most current articles said police were summoned to Kris Allen’s house and arrested a white male for trespassing and showed pictures of Adam being shoved in a police car. They also said the charges were inexplicably dropped. He felt bad how mean they were to Adam and so supportive toward him. He was glad this did not seem as big as the kissing story. Apparently, breaking and entering was not as interesting as molestation.

Kris was glad when Gina returned from seeing Adam. Katy came down to hear how she made out.

“Good news, Mr. Lambert happily agreed to our offer and signed the gag order.”

Kris was surprised, “He wasn’t mad?”

“On the contrary, he and his boyfriend seemed very happy to get the money. They were going on a vacation to some Burning Tree party. I think it’s a gay thing.”

“Boyfriend?”

“Yeah, Kris, his boyfriend. I am sorry but I think he might have used you. He seemed interested only in the money and his only stipulation was that you leave him alone. So there is a paragraph that says he won’t have contact with you. People can be really phony in this town and he is a trained actor.”

Katy looked at Gina, “He didn’t want his name cleared?”

“Honestly, Katy, the only thing he argued for was more money. Once I gave him an attractive offer he just signed and celebrated with his boyfriend. Maybe he has a drug problem and needed a fix. Whatever it was I am glad he just signed.”

Kris felt a little disappointed, “Didn’t he want to see me even if it was just to yell?”

“No and you cannot contact him. Kris, I mean it. I think you should take a small vacation. You have been wanting to do some charity work and I have just the thing. You can go to Africa for a couple months to gain some perspective and then finish your album.”

Katy looked at Kris, “Since you are unwilling to be honest at least maybe you can redeem yourself through good deeds.”

Kris actually thought that sounded like a good idea. He could get away and forget all about Adam Lambert. Gina wasted no time and Kris found himself on a plane to Africa a couple days later. He was relieved since he literally fought himself every hour to not call Adam.

Kris spent the next six weeks off the internet and living in remote villages. The trip made him remember what was important and gave him a lot of time to think. He had spent the first couple weeks making himself feel better by believing Adam was a gold digger. By the end of the trip, he was able to admit he had wronged Adam and he probably missed the opportunity to get to know a really great guy. Kris also realized he would probably never get that chance again.

On the way home Kris spent two days in Paris. He finally went online to see what was going on in the world and in Los Angeles. He checked the celebrity blogs and froze when he saw a sexy picture of Adam on Perez Hilton’s website. The headline said, “The hotness of Kris Allen’s stalker” and went on to gush about how sexy and talented Adam was in a new glamrock show. Perez went on to say Adam had been quoted that he has given up his stalker tendencies to focus on his career. The show was performed Wednesday nights at a Hollywood club and would continue for two more months. Kris found a few more reviews that had good things to say about the over-the-top show.

Kris met with his label and was told he needed to finish the album by the end of the month. As such, Kris found himself working long days cranking out songs that he had no emotional connection with. Against his better judgment, Gina’s earlier warnings and even the opinion-less Jake’s discouragement, Kris found himself standing outside the Roxy on Wednesday night. Kris swore to himself he would watch from afar and leave as soon as the show ended.

Finding a seat at the bar, quite a distance from the stage, Kris settled in and ordered a shot of tequila and a beer. Kris watched as the show began. The costumes were very decadent and the show reminded him of a rocked out cirque de soleil. The stage grew dark and he heard the unmistakable voice of Adam filling the theater. The lights flashed on and there was Adam looking glittery and beautiful. The bass and guitar kicked in and Adam strutted across the stage sensually and confidently. Kris could feel his body reacting to the sheer sexiness of the performance. The crowd was noticeably more excited since Adam hit the stage. Kris continued to watch the rest of the show in awe. Adam unabashedly stroked himself and had other dancers simulating sexual acts. He was damn good and deserved to be a superstar. Even though Kris was a triple platinum, arena selling pop-star, he felt intimidated by Adam’s inhibitions. Kris needed to cool off after Adam’s fourth song. He went to the bathroom and threw some water on his face. He heard the door bang open and two people moving toward a stall. He glanced up and saw one was Adam and the other Brad. They were kissing and laughing as they went into a stall. Kris felt like a knife was piercing his heart.

“God, I want to fuck you right here,” said the voice Kris recognized as Adam.

“Bring it on, big boy, we have ten minutes before the encore,” replied a breathless Brad.

Kris felt dizzy and sick. He realized what Gina had said was true. Adam had used him and had a boyfriend. He ran out of the bathroom head on to another figure and it spoke,

“Holy shit, Kris Allen what are you doing here?”

Kris looked up, “Oh fuck, Perez Hilton?” So much for not getting caught. This was without a doubt the worst luck Kris Allen had ever experienced.

+++

Adam hated to admit it but he was really hurt that Kris did not even bother to try and apologize or contact him. Adam felt like he had been bought off like a cheap whore once again. To make matters worse, by the end of the week he had received at least $150K in offers for interviews. Brad shrugged it off and said he would have ended up being a Jon Gosselin and that wouldn’t have been cool. He and Brad went to Burning Man which was fun and allowed Adam to get away from all the bullshit. While there, Adam decided he was just going to focus on the positive, be open to opportunities and not dwell on mistakes or things beyond his control. He also committed to forgetting about Kris Allen and not wasting his time on damaging relationships.

When they returned, Brad and he immediately began rehearsing for the show. Luckily, the paparazzi became bored with Adam since Kris had left the country. Adam was able to go back to his apartment and return to a normal life. Although no spa would hire him, Adam bought a massage table and was able to freelance by word of mouth. After a couple weeks, he built up a small clientele which included some Hollywood types. Brad offered to help but Adam had grown weary of Brad’s “help” and smartly declined. Brad ended up falling off the radar screen anyway by choosing to spend every free moment with his new boyfriend, Officer Panzelli. Adam refrained from criticizing him because Panzelli ended up being a great resource for making parking tickets go away.

Adam was nervous about the show’s debut especially because the media had emphasized his participation and referred to it as the glamrock show featuring Kris Allen’s stalker. The media had also attributed Kris’ goodwill Africa tour to his fear of being stalked. Adam had gotten a barrage of hate mail from 13 year-old girls that wanted their idol, Kris Allen, back. Luckily, thirteen year old girls did not make good assassins.

Opening night was surreal. The audience was incredible and the show well received. Unfortunately, in the excitement Brad ended up screwing one of the other performers after the show and Officer Panzelli caught them. He consequently dumped Brad which made Adam sad since he had parked in a tow away zone. Adam just celebrated with his family and kept his promise of avoiding damaging relationships. Adam was also feeling good because he only thought about Kris Allen twice a day. Once when he woke up and once when he went to bed. The rest of the time he considered himself fairly successful not thinking of Kris since it didn’t count if he was triggered by media. It wasn’t his fault Kris Allen was loved by the media and there were numerous triggers.

Brad was distraught that Panzelli had dumped him.

“I can’t believe how bent out of shape he got. It was a heat of the moment fuck and we weren’t in a monogamous relationship.”

“No, but he was at the show to be with you. Face it Brad, you are a lousy boyfriend. Why do you think I dumped you?”

“Hey, I don’t think after this Kris Allen affair you can stand in judgment of a “good” boyfriend. I stood by you the least you can do is tell me he is a jerk and I can do better.”

“Brad the guy was a miracle worker. We could park anywhere in this town and never pay a parking ticket. I just can’t hate the guy. Did you try your usual excuse that you were drunk and thought it was him?”

“Yeah, he didn’t believe me because they were like polar opposites. I should have fucked the brunette. Can you at least give me a pity massage?”

Adam knew Brad would keep whining and asking so he acquiesced. Brad undressed and laid down. Adam couldn’t help remembering the massages he gave Kris. So much for his not thinking of Kris Allen during the day track record. Adam began massaging Brad.

“Oh Babe, why didn’t you study this while we were dating? Fucking incredible.”

Adam hadn’t been with anyone since Kris which meant Adam’s sex drive was in overdrive. Having his naked, slutty, ex-boyfriend did not do much to calm him down. Adam tried to focus on the massage and found he could maintain his professionalism. He finished and wondered why he couldn’t have just done that with Kris. Brad sat up,

“Should I be insulted you didn’t blow me at the end of that. Sounds like Kris Allen got a better massage.”

“Shut up. Now, go home so I can sleep. We have another performance tomorrow.”

Brad left and Adam went to bed. He spent the next day surfing the net and learned Kris had returned to the US a week ago. Maybe I am a stalker. Need to focus on healthy relationships. Adam got done and headed to the Roxy. Some of his theater friends came down to see the show. Adam knew he should slow down but the Vodka martinis were going down easy and he wanted to have a good time and not think about Kris fucking Allen. The drinking did not even slow down for the show. Adam loved the stage and really got off on flirting with crowd. He felt sexy and frankly it made him horny. Heavily buzzed, massively aroused and feelings of loneliness were not going to be a positive combination. Brad came over,

“You are like sex on fire tonight. Sweet Jesus, you need to get laid.”

Adam wasn’t sure why that sounded so right. Adam pushed Brad up against the wall,

“Is that an offer?” Adam kissed Brad’s neck, “It sounds like a great idea.”

Adam felt Brad rub his erection against his own, “Babe, it’s a brilliant idea. Bathroom now!”

Vague alarms were ringing in Adam’s head but he wrote it off to the loud sound system and grabbed Brad. They stumbled into the bathroom unable to keep their hands off each other. Adam pushed Brad into the nearest stall totally focused on each other and breaking through the barrier of their elaborate costumes.

“God, I want to fuck you right here,” Adam was too far gone to stop.

“Bring it on, big boy, we have ten minutes before the encore,” replied a breathless Brad.

Adam finally got Brad’s tight pants down and his open enough to release his rock hard cock. Brad was kissing Adam’s nipples while fingering himself. Adam moaned,

“Oh, that feels good…You are soo hot…Oh…Kris…” Adam froze. Shit! Did he say that out loud? He felt Brad pause. Adam looked down remorsefully, “I am sor-“

Brad looked back at Adam and shrugged, “Save it for later. Stick to the basics like ooh baby.” Brad returned to his previous activities. Adam was disgusted with himself,

“Brad, stop. This is fucked up.”

“For chrissake, Adam. I just prepared myself to get fucked you can trip out on your time. Now be a good friend and fuck me.”

Adam was conflicted but as always defaulted to listening to his cock. He lifted Brad up and impaled him on himself. Good choice. They worked it into a comfortable rhythm. Brad and he had always been extremely compatible in the bedroom. They both came. Brad laughed as they fumbled to redress,

“I forgot how good a fuck you are, babe. You really have an amazing cock.”

Reality was crashing in on Adam. It was always a bad idea to fuck an ex-boyfriend that broke your heart in a bathroom stall and bad form to call said ex by the name of the man that almost destroyed your life. Adam tried to apologize again,

“Brad, I am sorry about the name thing.”

“If you are going to fantasize about someone else I wish you would have picked someone hotter because that was just insulting. However, unlike you, I am not overly sensitive and don’t break up with people for calling me another name in bed.”

Adam looked at Brad, “Doesn’t it bother you that I was thinking about him?”

“Obviously not as much as it is bothering you. Babe, it is not that complicated. I wanted to get fucked and you were horny. You being the head case that you are got off on thinking about the pussy that got away, sort of speak. I think we should redefine our relationship where you give me unlimited massages and fucks with out all that tiresome emotional bullshit you usually default to. What do you say?”

“Sorry, that goes against my commitment to not have fucked up relationships. Besides, I would never date someone with such low self-esteem that they let themselves be called Kris Allen,” Adam laughed.


	11. Chapter 11

Busted. Kris pretended he couldn’t hear anything Perez was saying and just headed out of the club as quickly as possible. He called Jake to bring the car around. Kris went home and proceeded to get drunk. He knew he should call Gina but did not want to listen to a lecture. He woke up with a pounding headache and a wicked hangover. Kris made his way downstairs and noticed his answering machine had 28 messages. His guards called and said Gina Falco just pulled up and was headed to the porch. Kris grabbed some aspirin and set the coffee pot.

The doorbell rang. Kris moaned and answered with his hand up,

“Gina, I feel like crap; please tone it down.”

“Tone it down? Kris, are you trying to destroy your career? What the fuck am I suppose to do when you can’t even follow basic instructions. Did you go see Adam at his show?”

“I went to a show and Adam happened to be in it. I didn’t even talk to him.”

“No, instead you talked to Perez fucking Hilton. Kris, he makes a career of outing people.”

“What did he say?”

“Look for yourself.” Gina handed him a printout of Perez’s blog. The headline read, “Kris Allen stalking the man that molested him?” Kris scanned the article and groaned handing it back to Gina.

Gina was furious, “Let me read you some of the key line ‘Last night at the Roxy I literally bumped into Kris Allen. Apparently, he must have decided he missed being stalked because he was there to see The Glitterfest Show featuring none other than Adam Lambert. That’s right, the man Kris Allen claimed molested him and broke into his house. Of course the charges were dropped and Adam supposedly was paid a lot of money to keep his mouth shut. At least that is what one of Adam’s friends told me.”

“I bet the friend was his fucking boyfriend. You were right, Gina, he may have used me. I bumped into Perez because I was running out of the men’s room where Adam and his boyfriend had decided to have sex.”

“Homosexuals are promiscuous. Did he see you?”

“No he was too busy maneuvering Brad into a stall.”

Gina shook her head, “I am not sure I can fix this Kris. Perez is going to try very hard to out you. Are there any other men?”

“No, I was with Katy.”

“Before Katy? Any men at all?”

“No, I have never been with a man…before Adam.”

Gina nodded, “Hell of a time to test the waters. I hope you are being honest. Lay low a few days and let’s see if the story even makes a splash. DO NOT CONTACT ADAM.”

“I think I am just going to sleep today away.”

“OK, feel better. I am going to meet with some of the label publicist I’ll let you know if anything out of the ordinary comes up.”

Kris slept the day away. He felt better by the evening and thought about the show and how incredibly hot Adam was onstage. Kris was getting hard picturing Adam dancing sensually and rubbing himself. Kris’ thoughts then meandered to seeing Adam and Brad all over each other. Kris’ erection faded as he thought about Adam being with another man. He was very jealous and decided to just watch TV. It did not improve his mood to see he was the butt of all the late night talk show hosts’ jokes. He finally just went to bed.

Kris spent the next few weeks lying low and finalizing tracks and then attended a meeting with the label. They spoke to him in a round about way but the veiled threat was apparent.

“Kris, while all publicity can be seen as good publicity, I think you are putting yourself and this label in a precarious position. I think your image would be better served with you keeping your private life more discreet. Its not fair put you are famous and a role model for millions of teenagers. You are known for your high moral character and down to earth lifestyle. It just doesn’t jive with having a gay affair with an extremely out of the closet wild child. Even if you are not, you need to make an effort to not fuel rumors.”

“I haven’t even left my house and they are still reporting on it.”

Gina snorted, “That is because that faggot is a media whore. He is more savvy than I thought. He keeps skirting the line of that gag order and charming the pants off the media. He is dangerous.” Gina turned to the executive at 19E, “Kris, understands and is going to be careful not to be caught in a compromising situation.”

The meeting ended. Kris went home and decided to get drunk instead of sit with bad feelings. He proceeded to polish off the last half of a bottle of scotch. Kris had the TV on when TMZ showed a clip where the paparazzi caught up to Adam coming out of a Starbucks. They asked him if he invited Kris Allen to his show.

Adam smiled, “A lot of celebrities come to the show simply because it is good. I didn’t invite him and he didn’t come up to me. I think as usual people are looking for a story where there is none.”

“Why did he drop the charges with you breaking in his house? What did you do in his house?”

Adam smiled again, “Sorry boys I can’t talk about that.”

“Did he pay you to keep your mouth shut? How much did you get? Were you lovers?”

“Sorry, I can’t elaborate for legal reasons.” Adam winked at the camera and then got in his car. Kris was furious. TMZ went on to say it appeared that the innocent Mr. Allen may not be that innocent. Kris downed two more fingers of scotch and drunk dialed Adam.

“Hello?”

“Congratulations on your small screen debut, TMZ is quite an accomplishment,” Kris hissed into the phone.

“Kris? Are you fucking insane calling me?”

“Why are you going to tape this call and sell it? Maybe Gina can give you and your boyfriend more date money.”

“You are either drunk or out of your mind. Frankly, you are scaring me.”

“I am probably both. Did you use me the whole time? Did you and Brad plan everything?”

Kris heard Adam sigh, “You mean plan you pretending you didn’t know me or plan your wife calling the cops after she bludgeoned me. Which part exactly did you think we masterminded? Fuck you.”

“I saw you with Brad that night. I was in the bathroom. Do you always fuck people in public places?”

Adam was silent. Kris took another sip of his drink, “Are you in love with him?”

Adam’s tone was cold, “Need I remind you that WE, as in me and you, are not involved. In fact, you were one step away from getting a restraining order on me so I really don’t think I have to explain to you my personal life or sex habits.”

Kris frowned at the response but changed subjects, “You were really hot on stage. Even hotter than you were that night at the upright. I loved watching you on the stage singing and dancing. You got really good reviews, you know.”

“You are all over the map, Kris. What do you want?”

“I don’t know. I just wanted to hear your voice. I wish I would have handled everything differently.”

Adam laughed, “There was certainly room for improvement. Kris, I think you need to just sleep this off.”

“Can I call you again?”

“Kris, you had Gina pay me off to shut my mouth and stay away from you. Don’t you think this undermines that? Besides, having contact with you doesn’t usually end well for me. I think it would be better if you didn’t.”

“Will you answer if I do?”

Kris knew he sounded pathetic but considering how drunk he was he really didn’t care. This was one of the reasons Kris did not get drunk that often. He was not an attractive drunk and apparently liked to sabotage his own career while inebriated.

“I honestly don’t know. I shouldn’t…but I might. Goodbye, Kris.”

Kris heard the sound of a dial tone and luckily fell asleep before he could hit redial. He woke up on his couch feeling like shit again. Kris was disoriented for a moment and then saw his phone praying he had a bad dream. He scrolled through his called list and saw Adam was indeed the last call it made. He needed to get control over himself. He needed to at least refrain from stalking Adam and maybe figure out a way to make things right. He also prayed Adam kept his call a secret.

+++

Adam woke up and saw Brad next to him. Shit! Definitely way too many martinis if fucking Brad seemed like a good idea. Adam sat up and felt a pain in his back. Yeah, definitely too many when fucking said ex in a stall seems like the way to go. Adam got out of bed purposely waking Brad in the process.

“Goodmorning, lover.”

“Brad, last night was a big mistake.”

“Why, you didn’t end up maimed or in jail. Seems like it was a better course of action than your other encounters. Besides, you should be thanking me.”

“Why was it a pity fuck? Look, I don’t want to get back with you.”

“As if I would give you a second chance. Please, bitch, I love you as a friend but you are really annoying as a boyfriend. I fucked you because I care and have your interest at heart. I probably saved your life.”

“Why was I going to die from blue balls?”

Brad rolled his eyes, “No, but I did save you from the walking disaster known as Kris fucking Allen. He came to your show and I distracted you before you could fuck your life up again.”

Adam stared at Brad, “Kris was there? Why didn’t you tell me? Was he there to see me?”

“Slow down, retard, in case you forgot he’s the douche that left your ass in jail. See, this is why I didn’t tell you last night. Anyway, I doubt he came out of his love for glamrock. His musical tastes seem to be a little more aligned with the Jonas brothers. Now why don’t you make me some breakfast since I went so far above and beyond. Over easy, please.”

Adam went in the kitchen and took out a box of cheerios for Brad. He wondered why Kris Allen would risk showing up at his show. Adam’s phone rang and it was his friend Cassidy,

“Hysterical. Did you see Perez’s blog on you and Kris Allen? The comments are people are writing are even funnier. I think Perez has a crush on you. Did you see Kris Allen at your show?”

“No, I had no idea he was there. Maybe his friends or his wife wanted to go.”

“You may get another fifteen minutes of fame out of this. Is Brad there? His phone is kicking into voicemail and we were going to a seminar together.”

“Yeah, he’s here,” Adam handed the phone to Brad. Adam got done and headed out to meet some friends at Starbucks. As he emerged from the café, a video camera was shoved in front of his face and a couple paparazzi asking him about Kris and his being at the show. Adam was a natural talker and rolled with it. He had been in Hollywood long enough to know the game.

The next couple of weeks he had paparazzi following him around trying to get a story. Exhausted from the second wave of media attention, Adam decided to have an easy night. He gave a b-list actress a massage and then headed back to his place to watch TV and catch up on sleep. His cell went off and Adam was surprised to see Kris was calling. He quickly realized Kris Allen had drunk dialed him and was clearly three sheets to the wind. Adam didn’t even know what to make of it but was sure Kris would regret it. He was still mad at Kris but did feel bad the guy was getting negative publicity. Adam decided to keep the call a secret.

As a result of the media attention Adam was getting, the show was featured on several talk shows. Although Adam wasn’t the headline act, the show producers strategically chose one of his songs to perform on TV. After one performance on Conan Obrien, Adam was invited to sit down for a couple minutes and came off likeable in the brief interview. Conan asked him about Kris,

“So what is the deal with you and Kris Allen? Did you stalk him? Is he stalking you?”

“Stalk is a strong word.” Adam laughed, “I think the media is just having a field day about nothing. There was a misunderstanding early on and we all have moved on. I really can’t talk about the details but I really think his appearance at the show was coincidental. I didn’t even know he was there until I saw Perez’s blog.”

“You were kind of made out to be a crazy, stalker that molests straight married men. You just don’t come off like that. Are you like that, Adam?”

“I do chase men but I don’t make a habit of going after straight, married ones. I think a lot of homophobes used that as an excuse to promote hate. Really, I am not a threat to heterosexuality. I wish the media would focus on music and not all this other drama but that is not the nature of the biz.”

“Well said. Thanks, Adam and you all can see the Glitterfest at the Roxy on Wednesday nights.”

The interview ended. Adam went out to a dance club and met up with Brad and Cassidy. Brad jumped on him,

“Hey there, media whore slash show stealer. Where have you been lately?”

“I saw you two nights ago at the show.”

“Yeah but we haven’t hung out or talked since…”

“Coincidence, that’s all. How have you been?”

“Good. Guess who is parking illegally again?”

“Thank God. So how did you finally convince Panzelli to take you back.”

“Unlike other people, Joey couldn’t stay away. Most normal people cannot resist the fabulousness of me. Actually, it is only mentally disturbed, stalkers that go for boring, closeted douches that seem immune. However, don’t get too excited because I am mad at your neglect so you don’t get parking immunity.”

That made Adam sad but he was happy Brad’s attention was occupied. Although he wouldn’t admit it, he had been avoiding Brad because after the sex he needed some distance. He and Brad had too much history to ever just be casual lovers. Plus, he had a habit of confiding in Brad and didn’t want to tell him about Kris calling. Adam drank, danced and made out with a few men before heading home alone.

The next day Adam got a strange call from an executive at 19E asking to meet him for lunch. Adam went knowing it was Kris Allen’s label. Brad had wanted to go but Adam declined his offer. Brad had not exactly secured him the best deal the last time around meeting with Kris’ people. Adam went to the restaurant and was approached by a gentlemen in his early forties who guided them to their table.

“Thanks for meeting me, Adam. My name is Rick Lorry and I am a talent agent for 19E. I saw your show last week and it was phenomenal. You have some set of chops on you. Have you ever thought about becoming a solo artist?”

Adam’s jaw dropped, “Yeah like all the time. I have done some studio sessions and was in a band before.”

“Great. I’m prepared to sign you up for a two year contract in which we will pay you 50K a year plus five percent of the profits from the album we will produce.” Rick smiled.

“Wow. I don’t even have songs.”

“We have songwriters.”

“What about my show?”

“It is over in another month anyway. You can finish it up while you start laying down tracks.”

“This is almost too good to be true. Is there a catch?”

“No catch but there are conditions.” Rick became deadly serious, “Kris Allen is one of our biggest money makers and it is our established artists that makes it possible for us to gamble on up and comers. You need to agree to stay away from Kris Allen and not damage his marketability. If you mess with him we will keep you hogtied to us and not support your album. However, if you play along you have a once in a lifetime opportunity to make it in a tough industry. What do you say, Adam? Do you want to make a record?”

Adam wished he had taken Brad here to help him decide. He knew the label was doing this to control him but it was a good opportunity. An opportunity he could not afford to screw up.

“Can I have a lawyer look at?”

“Sure but I need an answer tomorrow. Here is my personal cell, call me if you have any questions.”

Adam went to Brad’s house and showed him the contract. Brad read through it and said he should sign it since he had no other offers on the table.

“Shouldn’t I negotiate?”

“Adam, what are you going to negotiate? You have never had another offer and aren’t likely to get one. Shit, I would sign even if it said you had to blow every guy in the company. Relax, your luck is changing. I am telling you ever since Burning Man, the universe has shifted.”

“I think the label is just trying to keep me away from Kris.”

“Added bonus. Besides, you haven’t had any contact with the guy for months. Maybe I should try and stalk someone famous. Who should I go for? If I follow your example, I better pick some dorky, bubblegum pop-star. How about David Archuleta? He’s got that whole Mormon thing I can corrupt.”

“Maybe you should just settle for using sex to get out of minor traffic violations. I’ll see you later.”

Adam kissed Brad on the cheek and left. He went home and decided he agreed with Brad. The next day Adam called Rick and told him he signed the contract. Rick came by his house and Adam handed him the signed contract.

“Congratulations Adam and welcome to 19E. I will call you in a couple days with more details.”

Adam went out to celebrate with his pals. On his way out his cell phone rang and Adam saw Kris Allen’s name pop up. After two rings he rejected the call. For once, I am going to think with the right head. Adam was finished with risking his future for cute, sexy men.


	12. Chapter 12

Rejected. No rings and the line could be busy or the phone off; a few rings and maybe Adam can’t answer. Two rings means he had chosen not to answer. Kris would not stalk. He left a message and then thought how dumb that was after Adam rejected his call. At least all he said was the time he called and for Adam to call him back if he wanted. Kris was not surprised Adam didn’t call back.

Gina called Kris and told him Rick Lorry from the label wanted to meet with them. Kris hoped the meeting was about setting a release date for his new album. Gina and he met Rick at a swanky Brentwood Café.

“Hi Kris, you look good. I heard part of your album and I think you got yourself another multi platinum hit.”

“I hope so when will it be released?”

“Looking at September 15 so in about six weeks. Hopefully, the rumors of you being gay will die down and no others will crop up.”

Gina snorted, “Depends on good old Adam Lambert, he is getting way too much press considering his claim to fame is molesting Kris.”

“Adam Lambert won’t be running to the press on anything related to Kris unless we want him to. In fact, it is now in his interest to keep away from Kris as much as possible.”

Gina shook her head, “He is smart and knows how to get around things. I already tried to buy him off with money.”

“Well I bought him off with a record deal. 19E has complete control over Adam Lambert and he has agreed to stay away from Kris.”

Kris turned to Rick, “You gave him a record deal just to stay away from me?”

“Partly. The guy is actually quite talented and likeable. He may even end up selling a few records. Either way, we gave him a record deal to keep him in the box and you out of the headlines. You certainly haven’t been doing a great job of it for your own sake. I think Adam is a little more disciplined and won’t risk his success for a good lay, no offense.”

Kris was pissed. That certainly explained why Adam rejected his call. Gina was angry,

“I am happy you have neutralized him but I can’t see rewarding bad behavior. He is a manipulator and is using Kris to get publicity.”

“Well, he is a self promoter and we may even be able to use him to help Kris gain an edgier following while keeping his conservative fan base.”

Kris went home and was hurt that Adam had used him. He texted Adam knowing that he was now immune from Adam going to the media. Congrats on record deal. I guess when it is your career you have more discipline. Kris was hurt and felt worse when again Adam chose to ignore him.

Katy called Kris a few days later,

“Kris I am sending you the divorce papers. I want to move on and you seem to have managed to keep the truth hidden enough from getting outed,” said Katy in a disgusted tone.

“I wouldn’t shed anymore tears for the great Adam Lambert because the label just gave him a record deal to keep his mouth shut,” Kris said bitterly.

“Kris, you destroyed the guy’s life and publicly humiliated him just for liking you. You claimed you felt bad and now you are mad he is getting a break? I think you have been in Hollywood too long. I thought the trip to Africa might get your head on straight but I guess not. Maybe you should reinvent yourself because your nice guy routine is wearing thin. Let me know when you sign the papers.”

Katy hung up. Kris was depressed. His marriage was about to formally end, his crush had rejected him and he was being chased down by Perez Hilton. Kris wondered if it was karma and what he would need to do to fix it. Maybe Katy was right and he should be happy for Adam. Kris was determined to become a better person by just focusing on his music and helping people.

Gina had several meeting with 19E’s media experts and told Kris the company line was they signed Adam because he was very talented and that Kris had no hard feeling toward Adam.

Kris saw an opportunity to make ammends, “Maybe Adam and I should appear to get along again by doing some joint event.”

Gina looked at Kris like he was slow, “Kris, the label signed Adam to control him and keep him from damaging your reputation. I hardly think they want you two to be seen together which would just rehash gay rumors. They simply want to stop people like Perez from going after you because they think you’re a homophobe. I think the label was clear about you staying away from him.”

Kris just nodded in disappointment, “Katy sent me the divorce papers and wants me to sign immediately.”

“Well, I guess the timing is OK. We can probably keep it quiet a few more weeks.”

Kris looked at Gina, “Sorry my personal life is making your job so complicated. I should have timed my marriage falling apart better.”

Gina looked at Kris confused, “Anyway, I think things should calm down with Adam under control. Let’s focus on getting you some positive publicity for your soon to be released album.”

Kris ended up booked everyday for the next month doing publicity events. A week later his divorce became final and the media found out. Perez of course claimed that Katy left Kris because of his possible affair with the newly signed Adam Lambert. He also hinted that Adam was signed to the same label to control him with the media. Kris’ fans voiced their displeasure at the media painting their idol in a gay light claiming Kris was just a good forgiving person. Gina tried to control the next round of interviews by requesting the reporters not mention Adam Lambert. Unfortunately, the tactic was leaked and added more fuel to the fire.

On the flip-side, Adam was getting a lot of attention because several A-listers began talking him up in the media. His Glitterfest show was very popular among the Hollywood elite. It also helped that female stars seemed to love him since he was gay. Kris was happy that Adam was getting positive recognition but sad that he couldn’t be apart of it. Kris wished he could just forget Adam Lambert.

A week before his album would be released, Kris attended a fellow label artist’s album release party. He invited his brother to go with him rather than a bandmate to avoid further gay speculation. He arrived and his attention was immediately drawn to a decked out Adam Lambert doing shots with some other similarly leather clad people. Kris thought they looked like they were attending an S&M club rather than a record release party. Especially, because most of the other guests were more low key, soft pop/folk music fans. Kris made the rounds greeting industry people while watching Adam and his crew have a good time.

Kris was drinking a beer at the bar alone since Daniel was getting his game on with several attractive women that were way out of his league.

“I hope you are not planning to mess Adam up because he can’t afford to go to jail or the hospital tonight. He has a photo shoot in the morning.”

Kris looked over and saw Brad glaring at him, “When will I get the chance? He will probably be too busy fucking you in a bathroom stall.” Both Kris and Brad were shocked by Kris’ words.

Brad recovered soon enough, “Jealous, bitch? Trust me, I will do whatever it takes to keep Adam away from you because you are not good for him.”

Kris was glad he was sober otherwise he would not have been able to control his fist. He glared at Brad,

“You better walk away before I do something you regret.”

“Bring it on, bitch, you wouldn’t dare risk hurting the goody two shoe image you try to cultivate. You even let an innocent man rot in jail because you won’t admit to liking dick.”

Sober or not, Kris lost it and punched Brad in the face. The next thing he knew he was rolling around on the ground and they were being broken up by Jake and club security. Cameras were going off everywhere. Kris looked over and saw Adam coming over with a shocked expression. He went by Brad which made matters worse. Brad was yelling and Kris heard him say

“That bitch attacked me because he was jealous that we were together.”

Kris cringed and saw Adam do the same. Jake suggested they leave. Brad yelled after Kris,

“I am going to file assault charges. Let’s see how you like going to jail, bitch. You might like it since you can get fucked up the ass and then just claim it was rape.”

Kris felt Jake trying to pull him toward the door. Unfortunately, Police arrived on scene and an officer turned to Kris,

“Mr. Allen, we will need a statement.”

+++

Life could not have taken more than a 180 for Adam. He had a record deal, was invited to A-list parties, had a record deal and positive media attention. There was no way he was going to risk his good fortune on a man that turned his back on him not once but twice. Yes, rejecting the call was easy. As long as Adam could avoid seeing or hearing about Kris Allen he would be able to move on quite easily.

Adam understood the label signed him to shut him up but he planned to take it as an opportunity. He agreed to a crazy recording schedule that began almost immediately after signing. Adam was shocked that plenty of songwriters were willing to help him on the album. His show had given him quite a bit of exposure to industry types that could make his dreams possible. It was little over a month after signing and he had six songs recorded. Adam was hoping to release a single by mid-September and an album to follow couple weeks later.

Adam got invited to one of the artists he met in while recording one of his songs. Although musically they were very different, they had got on well and Adam wanted to show support. Adam decided to bring Brad and some of his friends from his show. It was fairly boring but they had free booze so that made up for it. Adam and his friends were on their fifth shot which did not bode well. Adam noticed Brad was missing but didn’t care because he had been acting moody all night. Adam assumed it was because Joey was working a lot of double shifts.

Adam scanned the room again and then noticed a ruckus near the bar. He was horrified to see Brad on the floor pulling Kris Allen’s hair. Adam ran over as security broke them up. He went by Brad whose nose was bleeding.

“What happened?”

“That douche-bag punched me. That bitch attacked me because he was jealous that we were together.”

Adam cringed at Brad’s words and hoped he would shut up. Adam saw Kris being guided to the door by his bodyguard. Brad yelled after Kris,

“I am going to file assault charges. Let’s see how you like going to jail, bitch. You might like it since you can get fucked up the ass and then just claim it was rape.”

Adam grabbed Brad’s arm and said low, “Shut-up before you make more of a scene.”

“Good. That fucker-

“Brad, calm down.”

One of the officers came over, “Hi Brad, what happened?”

Brad looked up, “Oh hi, Paul. I was attacked.

Adam pushed Brad, “Officer, Brad is just upset, he doesn’t want to press charges.”

“Oh yes I do.”

“No, Brad, you don’t because the label will fuck me over since you are my guest.”

Brad looked at Adam, “Well how does keeping quiet benefit me? This is my chance at fame. It is not my fault that pussy can’t control his temper.”

The cop looked at Brad, “Do you want to make a statement, Brad?”

“Yes. Kris Allen assaulted me so you can arrest him.”

Adam grabbed Brad’s chin and turned his face to look at him, “Please Brad, let it go. I am begging you.”

“I can’t believe you are still protecting that douche. You may be enamored with Kris Allen but I am not and you haven’t been treating me good enough to give in to your request.” Brad became thoughtful, “What are you willing to do for me to not press charges?”

“What do you want?” Adam hoped Brad would thing of something relatively innocuous.

Brad turned to the police officer, “Paul, let me have a few minutes to get my statement together.” Paul walked away.

Adam looked at Brad and hoped to distract him from being…Brad, “How do you know that cop?”

“I meet a lot of cops since I am dating one. Anyway, you have to be my slave for a month and not just like domestic help either. Along with doing my laundry and cleaning my apartment, you have to give me massages, blow jobs and anything else I think up.”

Fuck, “I am way too busy for that. Be reasonable. I don’t have time to do housework.”

“Fine, then you can just be my masseur and sex slave.”

“What about your boyfriend?”

“He can service himself. So sex slave for a month or I press charges against your pathetic crush.”

Adam just shook his head, “Be more reasonable.”

“Two weeks.”

Adam was drunk and needed to salvage this situation, “How about threes weeks of just massages.”

“Get real. You are good masseur but I like your cock in me much more. Let’s compromise. Only two weeks and I get unlimited massages with happy endings.”

Adam weighed his options, “Fine. Two weeks and it cannot interfere with my work.”

Brad smiled mischievously, “You really are easy, Adam and I mean that in all contexts. Kiss me to solidify the deal.”

Adam kissed Brad short on the lips. Brad put his hand behind Adam’s head and pulled him in for a deeper kiss. Adam let it go on for a few seconds before pulling back. He looked over toward where Kris had been standing and saw Kris looking at them with a hurt expression. Adam felt like shit. Brad seemed to notice,

“Babe, you are going to thank me for this later. You have no self control so I made sure you didn’t screw up your life. Surely, two weeks of my fabulousness is worth it. It is almost like getting a rebate on a free gift.”

“More like getting taxed on an extortion payment. Tell your buddy, Paul you are dropping the charges and let’s go before I get dropped from the label.”

Brad spoke to Paul for a few minutes and then left with Adam. Adam was still really buzzed. They went back to Brad’s apartment. Brad was sobering up and whining about his “broken” nose. Adam chuckled,

“He hit you pretty good and I think the photos are going to be hysterical. You realize you fight like a total girl.”

“Damn straight I do. I am too pretty to fight like a man. Besides, pulling hair and scratching is very effective against a formidable opponent. Now why don’t you come here and make good on your deal.”

“Isn’t Joey going to mind our arrangement?”

“Not at all since he isn’t going to know about it. He is working a lot lately so he can make some money to take me to the Caribbean. You know I am not very good at being faithful when left alone. So actually, I am doing him a favor by just occupying myself with you.”

Adam laughed, “How will he not know when you are going to be featured all over the tabloids to a shot of us kissing since you insisted on being affectionate in public. Not too smart.”

“No worries, I’ll pull a Kris Allen and say you kissed me. I’ll take my blow job now.”

Adam grudgingly complied. At least he still found Brad hot and really it was kind of nice to have sex again. Once he finished he decided to head back home even though he was still slightly buzzed. He was thankful there were no paparazzi and hoped Kris was OK. He knew it was a bad idea but he texted Kris. Are u ok? Sorry 4 2nite. Adam was surprised when his phone rang.

“Sorry your boyfriend goaded me or sorry I didn’t get arrested?”

Adam realized he didn’t even know what the fight had been about.

“Did Brad start with you? What happened?”

“Didn’t your boyfriend tell you? He warned me to stay away from you and then just became obnoxious.”

“Brad can be very obnoxious. Listen, I am not supposed to have any contact with you so I should get off the phone. I just wanted to make sure you were OK.”

“I’m fine. By the way, congratulations on the record deal. I really hope it works out. You are an amazing performer and people should get to experience your talent. I better get some sleep because I am going to get crucified by the media,” Kris laughed.

Adam loved the sound, “You know what they say, any publicity is good publicity.”

Kris laughed again, “I am not sure attacking my stalker’s boyfriend is a sales booster…”

Adam continued joking, “It makes you seem more passionate.”

“That is a euphemism for psychotic. But I guess it was kind of crazy. Since meeting you, I seem to be doing a lot of things I wouldn’t normally do.”

“I know what you mean.” Adam really did. Both of them seemed to act recklessly and jeopardize their careers when around each other. Adam was usually methodical in his actions and was sure Kris was the same way.

“Goodnight, Adam.”

“Goodnight, Kris.”

Adam hung up and decided it was time to sleep. He had a feeling he was going to have an impromptu meeting with the label and get blamed for the mayhem. He just hoped they didn’t stop producing his album and leave him out to dry.


	13. Chapter 13

Chaos. Kris looked at the police officer, “I should probably call my lawyer first.”

“Neither one of you looks damaged too bad. Are you looking to press charges?”

“No.”

“Let me see if the other guy is. If not, we can probably just let you both go.”

Kris worried this would be poetic justice if he was arrested. He really couldn’t blame Adam if he let it happen. Either way the label was going to be pissed. Kris waited while the police officer spoke to another cop. Kris looked over and saw Brad kiss Adam. A pain retched through Kris’ chest. The officer came back over,

“Good news, Mr. Allen, the other man doesn’t want to press charges so you are free to go.”

“Thanks.”

“I’m sorry to ask but can you write my daughter an autograph. She is thirteen and loves you.”

Kris thought it was a tasteless request but didn’t think declining was in his best interest, “Sure.”

Kris and Jake headed home. Kris went in his house and poured himself a healthy glass of scotch. A couple hours later his cell vibrated. Kris dreaded what was coming but looked anyway and was shocked it was a text from Adam. Since he had some liquid courage, he called Adam back and was surprised they chatted normally. Kris hung up feeling better than he thought he could considering his impending doom.

Kris went to bed and woke up to his phone ringing off the hook. He answered, “Hello.”

“Have you read the papers? I don’t even know what to say. In what universe could you possibly exist in where punching Adam Lambert’s lover at a media intense party is a good idea.”

“How bad is it?”

“Bad. The label thinks you are on drugs or need to be committed. TMZ has the whole thing on video and it is obvious you threw the first punch.”

“That is because he is more of a hair puller than a boxer.”

“Make jokes now because we need to meet with the label in two hours to discuss if we should delay your album release.”

Kris showered and took some aspirin. Gina came back to take him to the meeting. Kris purposely stayed off his computer and avoided the TV. Gina, however, had her laptop in the car and showed Kris the articles and pictures. Kris Allen Attacks Former Stalker’s Boyfriend, On The Heels Of His Divorce, Kris Allen Fights For His Lover, Kris Allen On Drugs, Kris Allen In A Jealous Rage and finally Perez’s blog claimed Adam Lambert And The Men That Love Him.

Kris actually laughed at Perez’s article. Gina shook her head,

“Do you realize you may have destroyed your career?”

“I realize I made a lot of bad decisions to avoid the inevitable.”

“Yes, you did. You should have avoided Adam at all costs after that first scandal.”

“No, Gina, I should have owned up to the truth and weathered the scandal.”

Gina stared at Kris, “I have not devoted the last five years of my life for you to become a has been. I have no idea what this guy does for you because personally he seems a bit overdone. Do you want to indulge in reckless homosexual activities rather than make music? No one is going to hire me as a publicist with you being such an ass in the media.”

Kris rolled his eyes, “Sorry I cannot be a better resume example.”

“Let me try and handle the label. I will say you were drunk and the guy picked a fight with you.”

“Gina, lying seems to be making things worse. I was pretty sober.”

“No one likes a psycho, Kris, they are more sympathetic to a pathetic drunk. Now, you were drunk, the guy picked a fight and things escalated; end of story.”

Kris just looked out the window and wondered if Adam was in trouble. His cell phone vibrated and he saw a text from Adam, R U OK. I M at 19E. C U in meeting.

Gina was staring at him after glancing at his phone, “Please tell me you are not getting texts from him? Kris, he is a starving artist manipulating you for fame. He is a player and has a boyfriend. You are naïve if you think he has feelings for you.”

Kris just put his phone away without replying. They arrived at the office building. Kris and Gina were shown into conference room. There were several executives to include Rick Lorry who was sitting next to Adam. Kris couldn’t help but notice Adam looked good, real good. Kris knew that some of the label heavy weights were sitting in on the meeting.

Gina looked at Adam and then turned to Rick, “Why is he here?”

“Because it involves both artists and dealing with them separately has not been too effective,” Rick explained.

Gina glared at Rick, “Kris, should not have to deal with him.”

“Really? Because Kris seems to be trying to deal with him an awful lot lately.”

Kris spoke up, “It is fine, Gina. I am sure this meeting is about me and Adam so no reason he shouldn’t be here for it.”

Rick gestured for them to sit down and turned to Adam, “Your boyfriend is OK and still not pressing charges, correct?”

“Brad is not my boyfriend and no he is not pressing charges. Look, I am not condoning violence but in Kris’ defense Brad could lure Ghandi into a brawl.”

“Then why did you take him to the party?”

“He is my friend and despite him being obnoxious, I really like the guy. In case you couldn’t guess by the hair pulling, he usually isn’t a fighter.”

Gina looked at Adam, “Are you sure you didn’t instigate or stage it. After all both you and your boyfriend are both season actors.”

“I don’t know about seasoned but yes we both performed on stage. I didn’t even know Kris was there and again Brad is not my boyfriend.”

Rick looked at Adam, “Since Brad isn’t your boyfriend he can just be some guy that is jealous of Kris. You can make a statement that he was a drunk acquaintance and Kris was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. You can say you barely even know the guy.”

Adam looked at Rick, “No, I am not going to do that to Brad.”

“If you want your album out in a month, you will do that.”

Adam looked around the room, “Fuck all of you. Brad is my friend and I am not going to treat him like a stranger for a record deal. It is pointless and mean. So far, every time you all try and ‘save’ Kris’ reputation he becomes more of a media target. I am not going to lie and if it costs me my one shot so be it.” Adam turned to Kris, “See it really isn’t all that hard to do the right thing.” Adam walked out of the room and everyone was speechless.

Gina snorted, “Two weeks of not recording and he will be willing to disown his mother.”

Rick shook his head, “I don’t know. I’ve spent the last few weeks with him and he stays pretty true to himself. Maybe we should think about taking another approach.”

“I think we should make it seem like Adam and Brad set Kris up to gain publicity,” Gina announced.

One of the executives nodded, “We can say 19E was threatening to drop him and then tried to coerce us into keeping him on.”

Kris felt nauseous, “You can’t do that to him. I’m the one that got into a fight with his friend. He’s a talented singer and should be making records. His friend isn’t pressing charges and I can just say I was drunk. I’ll act contrite and swear off hard liquor. I’m just getting over a divorce so people will be sympathetic.”

Rick looked at Kris with approval, “That is probably more plausible and a better alternative.”

“So will Adam be able to complete his record?”

“Yeah, because it actually is quite good and marketable. So, just to be clear, you are going to deny having a relationship with Adam and claim you and his friend fought because you were drunk.”

“Yeah, pretty much,” Kris felt a weight come off his chest.

Gina walked out furious. Kris just watched her go and thought maybe it was time to get a new publicist. The meeting went on and they decided to forge ahead with his album release as planned. Kris walked out feeling pretty good.

+++

Adam walked out of the meeting with his heart racing. He was furious that the label expected him to turn his back on his friends. As the minutes passed, panic set in and Adam thought about how he ruined his one shot at fame. The only thing keeping him from running back in the room was pride. What an idiot. Brad would have totally gone along with it. Well, it would have probably cost him a lifetime of massages and blowjobs but at least he’d still have a record. Adam just headed back to his apartment a little crushed.

His phone rang and it was Brad. Adam answered annoyed,

“I am not giving you another blowjob.”

“You ruined my life. Joey isn’t buying my Kris Allen routine. You need to tell him you were drunk and trying to make Kris Allen jealous.”

“Is everyone taking a permanent hiatus from honesty?”

“Please, bitch, am I suppose to tell him I blackmailed my ex into fucking me for two weeks? I don’t think honesty is the correct response to the situation.”

“Maybe, if you lose him you will learn for the next one to be faithful.”

Brad laughed, “I never realized what a comedienne you are. Anyway, help a guy out and talk to Joey.”

“No way because if he finds out I am lying he has the capacity to make my life a living hell.”

“Well, if you don’t he is going to think we are cheating together and dig up all your traffic tickets.”

Adam thought about it and saw the wisdom, “I will talk to him but then we are even and I don’t have to be your private masseur or whore.”

“It is really mean to take advantage and kick a man while he’s down.”

Adam laughed, “Isn’t it though?”

“All well, you probably would have fantasized about Kris again anyway. Go patch things up with me and Joey so he can take me to St. Croix.”

Adam wasn’t too keen on lying but he was glad to get Brad and his relationship back in the box. He really did not need to add sex with an ex into his already fucked up life. Adam called Joey and fed him a bunch of lies. Adam felt bad because Joey seemed to think Brad was really sweet and innocent deep down. Adam didn’t feel like tell him he would have to dig all the way to hell before he found that Brad.

Later that night Rick Lorry called,

“Good news, bro. Your pal Kris Allen stuck up for you and decided to take the fall on this one. He is going to claim he caused the fight because he had been drinking and feeling bad about his divorce. He is going to swear off hard liquor and beg forgiveness from his fans. So we are back in the studio, see you tomorrow.”

Adam was ecstatic. He called Kris and got his voicemail. Even easier,

“Hi Kris, it’s Adam Lambert. Thanks for today. Rick called me and said you stuck up for me. He also said the label is letting me keep working on the album so I get to go to the studio tomorrow. I owe you one, bye.”

An hour later Adam’s cell vibrated with a text,

Do u still give massages?


	14. Chapter 14

After the meeting Kris went home still feeling better than he had in months. Gina showed up a couple hours later. Kris could tell she was still mad.

“Kris, I can’t help you if you don’t listen. I realize you are getting over a divorce and are very confused. Maybe you should see a psychiatrist. The trauma of losing Katy may be manifesting itself into making you think you like men. You are not gay, Kris. You are better than that.”

Kris looked at Gina, “I may have issues but my divorce making me think I am gay is not one of them. Lying to the public, lying to my wife and lying to myself seems like my bigger concern.”

“Ridiculous. You are a public figure and you need to be a role model. You are a multi-platinum artist who has millions of fans. You need to live up to their expectations. Kris, I spent the last five years helping you become the person you are, don’t throw it away for some cheap queer looking to ride on your coat-tails.”

“You are right. You have helped me to become the kind of person that is willing to say and do anything to appease others. Well, I don’t like that person and I don’t think it is a good role model. Adam was willing to give up his one chance at making it for a friend, that to me, is a better role model.”

“Yeah, and in five years, Adam will be working at Starbucks.”

“Gina, I think we have very different agendas and maybe it’s time I hire someone whose principles match mine.”

“Are you firing me?”

Kris smiled as he realized what he was doing, “Yeah, I think I am. Goodbye, Gina.”

Gina was dumbstruck and then became angry, “You will regret this, Kris Allen. I guarantee you that without me your album will flop and you will become one of those has-beens that VH1 features in Where Are They Now. I hope that faggot is worth it.”

Gina stormed out. Kris was shaking a little after having such a big confrontation. He went to fix himself a drink and decided to call Katy instead. Katy answered,

“Kris? What is wrong?”

“Nothing. I just fired Gina.”

“About time. What did she do now? Did she want you to sell your parents?”

Kris smiled, “She wanted me to lie again. Did you see the TMZ video with me fighting?”

“I don’t read tabloids anymore. Why were you fighting?”

“It was stupid. I got into it with Adam’s friend at a record release party and it was caught on tape. So the next day we had a meeting and the label wanted Adam to lie and say his friend was just a drunk acquaintance and he wouldn’t. He was going to throw away his album deal. Then Gina suggested the label make it seem like Adam and his friend set me up to get publicity to help Adam’s career. I said no and she stormed out of the meeting.”

“I am so proud of you. I think if circumstances were different I could like this guy, Adam. Kris, I really hope you continue to do the right thing because fame is fleeting and you need to be able to look in the mirror and like the man you see. If you keep people like Gina around you, I am not sure you will.”

“I know. I am sorry our marriage didn’t work out.”

“I am sorry too but at least we can remain friends. I am not sure I am what you are really looking for in a partner…I might not be tall enough,” Katy laughed.

“Take care, Katy and let me know if you need anything.”

“You too, Kris and good luck.”

Kris released a statement apologizing for his behavior at a recent album release party saying he was drunk and not thinking straight. He said his recent divorce had him out of sorts and he took it out on the first person that crossed his path. He went on to say he was sorry for hitting Brad and was giving up tequila. His fans rallied behind him. Perez didn’t seem quite as a appeased and wrote another article headlined, 'Come on Allen, Tequila?' The article went to say 'Mr. boring-plaid-straight as an arrow finally shows some personality and he blames it on tequila. Weak. Mr. Allen just come out of the closet because your being a helpless victim of molestation, stalking and now tequila is wearing thin. Too bad for you it looks like Glambert already has found a gay version of you.' The article showed the picture of Brad and Adam kissing after the fight.

Kris just laughed. He was in a good mood from listening to his voice mail and hearing Adam’s voice. He had taken a big chance texting Adam but was again pleasantly surprised when Adam text back, Just 4 U.

Kris didn’t have a chance to follow up on his request since he had to scramble to hire a new publicist. Rick recommended a replacement which was a man named Jason who had worked with several country celebrities. Jason was in his late thirties and seemed like a really nice guy. He had seen some of the stories on Kris and Kris told him the truth behind the stories.

Jason seemed nonplussed, “I think there is an opportunity here to turn this around and spread a message of tolerance. I think you should invite Adam to your album release party to show there are no hard feelings. Are you involved with him now?”

Kris was ready to deny it but decided to be honest, “No, but I kind of like him.”

“OK, I am not sure the public is ready for your coming out and sounds like neither are you. But, you can be Adam’s friend and you can support each other musically.”

“I’d like that but people think we stalked each other.”

Jason shrugged, “Laugh it off. You can’t come totally clean because frankly the way you lied is pretty bad. But, you can say now that you had the opportunity to meet Adam around the studio and you realized he was a nice guy.”

“Will the public accept that?”

“Are you kidding me? They love that sappy stuff.”

“If you were my publicist when the scandal originally broke what would you have advised?”

“I would have told you to either stick to no comment or be honest. Outright lies have a way of spinning at of control, as you now know,” Jason smiled.

Kris smiled back and hired Jason on the spot.

+++

Adam smiled as he sent his text response,

Just 4 U.

Adam went to sleep happy and headed into the studio the next day. Rick was pushing him to get the tracks down quickly, “I want to get a single out in a few weeks. At the rate you get roped into scandals, I think we need to strike fast.”

Adam laughed, “I do seem to have a penchant for getting sucked into drama.”

“Exactly, and it would be nice to use that to support a record, so lets get busy.”

Adam was exhausted by the end of the week and was surprised when Rick told him he was invited to Kris Allen’s album release party. Rick also suggested he take someone besides Brad. Adam couldn’t agree more and decided to bring his friend, Melissa from the Glitterfest show. Melissa was one of the least likely people to make a scandal which made her an excellent escort for the event.

Adam arrived and guided Melissa to an inconspicuous table toward the back of the room. He was committed to avoiding any attention.

“Still stalking?”

Adam turned and saw Perez Hilton standing by his table. Adam laughed, “Old habits die hard. As a newly signed artist, I try to support my fellow label mates.”

“I bet. Look I have no doubt Allen is a closet case and probably just balked at getting caught. What are you getting out of the deal?”

“You really think I am going to have this conversation?”

Perez smiled, “No. How about talking about your album?”

“Well, I am recording songs written by some pretty talented songwriters and I think we might release a single in a few weeks. It’s kind of techno-glam.”

“Are you going to go in the closet when you start getting famous?”

Adam laughed, “I doubt any closet is that big. Nah, I am who I am and I couldn’t imagine hiding something like that. It’s silly. So, are you going to write a mean article on me?”

“Not until you do something stupid. I do have a job to do.”

Adam laughed again, “Well, I tend to do stupid things every so often so you’ll have plenty of opportunity.”

Perez shrugged, “Publicity helps artists. Besides, I was one of the few anti-Allen, pro-Lambert reporters.”

Adam nodded, “I appreciate that but Kris really isn’t a bad guy. His album is pretty good too.”

“Watch those crushes on straight men, they lead to heartache. Have a good night, Adam.”

Perez walked away and Adam hoped he didn’t write about him crushing on Kris. But, Perez had a point, chasing after straight men or bi-curious men was not the way to go. Adam liked his men loud and proud. Adam was aware that Perez had brought some attention to him and steeled himself awaiting the next encounter. A clean cut, thirty-something guy approached him next, “Hi Adam, I am Jason, Kris’ new publicist. I replaced Gina.”

Great now they found some nice looking, plaid guy to beat him down. “I was invited here,” Adam responded defensively.

Jason laughed, “I know. I sent the invitation. I think it would help both of your careers to put the past behind you and just focus on making and promoting your music.”

“Your not worried Kris will lose fans if he is seen associating with a gay man?”

“Probably not for just associating with him but maybe he would lose some for dating a man. Coming out is usually tricky and most stars chose discretion instead. From what I can tell Kris is a pretty private person and not very comfortable with the media getting up and personal.”

“Are you warning me to stay away from him?”

“I am a publicist, I don’t threaten people. I recommend courses of action that benefit my client. I think you two being friends is fine but should it go further I don’t think Kris would benefit from it being public. Of course, if he decides he wants to come out then I will support him with his decision. You and Kris are very different people so what is good for you may not be good for him.”

“I am not a discreet person.”

Jason smiled, “I can tell. I just hope you consider all the repercussions before you decide what kind of relationship you want with Kris. Enjoy your night, Adam.”

Adam looked at Jason and wondered if he wasn’t more strategic than Gina. He knew just what to say that would restrain Adam from ravishing Kris. Adam was still deep in thought when he heard a familiar voice,

“Hi Adam, I am glad you came,” Kris smiled at him.

“Congratulations, I heard some of the tracks and it is really good.”

“Thanks. I see you met Jason. He is much nicer than Gina.”

“Yes he certainly is very…diplomatic,” Adam was looking around for an escape. He needed to think without Kris near him. He could smell Kris’ cheap aftershave and it was kind of turning him on. How did a man with so little style and taste do it for him? Well, he was Adam’s type physically and Perez had been right to point out he did look a lot like his ex. However, beyond short, brown eyes and brunette the two were nothing alike. Adam was still thinking about the comparison when he noticed Kris was staring expecting some kind of response.

“I am sorry, what did you say?”

Kris looked away, “I asked if you came with anyone.”

“Yeah, my girlfriend Melissa.”

Kris seemed to just stare for a minute, “Oh, I didn’t know you dated women.”

Adam laughed, “Figure of speech she is a friend that is a girl. I’m not a switch hitter. So are you crazy busy promoting this album?”

“I have to do a lot of morning shows, talk shows and some radio interviews. Without Katy and Gina, I think I am going to have to hire a personal assistant. I think Jason is less hands on.”

“That might be a good thing.”

Kris nodded, “I have to go make my rounds. Do you want to get together sometime? Maybe just talk or something.”

“Really? Just talk? What happened to the massage?”

Kris blushed, “I didn’t want to seem pushy.”

Adam tried to think about Kris leaving him out to dry with the media and the police but found he was too busy picturing Kris naked beneath him. Well, things seemed to have worked out ok. After all if not for Kris’ bullshit he wouldn’t have a record deal. Adam smiled, “Letting it be known what you want isn’t necessarily pushy.”

Kris looked down shyly, “This party should wrap up in a couple hours. You could come over.”

Adam was about to jump at the offer until he thought about Jason’s words. Adam hesitated and then pictured Kris naked again. He decided to compromise with his conscience and just be cautious. “Your house is probably watched by paparazzi 24/7 and I don’t want to get accused of stalking. If you still want to get together call me when you leave and come to my apartment. The paparazzi have stopped hanging around my place.”

“Ok. I’ll call before I get there.” Kris walked away and Adam began to get antsy. He convinced Melissa he had a headache and he needed to go home to bed. Adam dropped her off at home feeling only slightly guilty about being a lame date. He quickly cleaned up his place in anticipation of Kris’ arrival. About three hours later, Adam’s excitement dropped when he realized Kris wasn’t coming.


	15. Chapter 15

Moral courage. Kris left Adam to mingle with all his other well-wishers. About a half hour later, Kris noticed Adam’s guest was sitting alone. Adam was across the room talking with some label executives.  
Kris went over,

“Melissa, right?”

Melissa smiled at Kris, “Yes and your Kris Allen. I voted for you way back when on idol.”

“Thank you. I wouldn’t be here today if not for those votes. So what do you do?”

“I am a dancer. I was in the Glitterfest show.”

“Impressive. I was lucky enough to see it and it was great. Is it still on?”

Melissa shook her head, “No, are supposed to take it on the road but we need to replace Adam and probably Brad.”

“Why can’t Brad go?”

Melissa shrugged, “I doubt he would leave Adam. Last time they were separated they broke up and recently it seemed like they were finally getting back together. Well, er, before all the stuff with you.”

Kris was a little taken aback, “I thought they were just friends.”

“They were boyfriends and really, really in love. Everyone thought they would last forever but then Adam went on the road with Wicked and it strained their relationship. Brad has been trying to get back with Adam for years and it seemed like they were together again but I guess not. They were so cute together.”

Kris wondered how close they were. He knew they were lovers but the fact that Adam had been willing to risk his career sticking up for him must mean that he was also emotionally committed to the guy. Kris hoped he wasn’t standing in the way of true love especially if he was not sure what he wanted. Kris looked at Melissa,

“Do you think Adam loves Brad?”

“Without a doubt. He was devastated when they broke up and I have never seen him fall for anyone as intensely. I think eventually they will get back together since neither one seems to have moved on.”

Kris saw Adam coming over and excused himself. He continued to socialize and didn’t see Adam leave. He decided to drink. He proceeded to get pretty drunk and was happy when Jake took him home. He had decided not to go to Adam’s apartment. If Adam had a chance at being with his true love, Kris had no right to get in the middle. He did not want to ruin Adam Lambert’s life anymore than he had.

Kris went to bed and woke up the next day hung-rover. He checked his cell phone and there were no messages which meant either Adam didn’t care or he was mad. Kris kind of hoped it was the latter but then dismissed the selfish thought. Kris met with Jason and went over the next week’s hectic schedule. Jason suggested he get a personal assistant to help him manage his daily life.

“You are going to be busy over the next few months and you needs someone telling you where to be, what to where etc and that really isn’t my job. I can’t believe you don’t already have one.”

“Gina did everything. How do I find one?”

“I’ll talk to Rick. How about we give you like three to choose from.”

“OK.”

Kris said goodbye to Jason and went to the studio. He wanted to thank some of the studio musicians since he did not have a chance to speak with them the night before. He went in and went into the sound booth. He saw Rick there and he was talking into the microphone,

“OK, Adam. Do it again just like that. OK, recording.” Kris thought Adam’s voice sounded great in a theater but it was nothing to what it sounded like in a studio. Rick noticed Kris and pointed to a seat. Kris sat down and watched as Adam recorded a very dark, melodic song. It was gut retching and beautiful. When Adam finished the last note Rick spoke in the microphone,

“Perfect, Adam. Relax, take a break and I will play it back in a few minutes.” Rick motioned for the technician to set up the equipment, “So, Kris, what brings you to the studio?”

“I was going to thank the musicians since I got waylaid most of the night. I didn’t know you handled the technical aspects of recording.”

“I usually don’t but I wrote this song with my ex-girlfriend and wanted to be a part of its production. The actual album producer will be coming by in a couple hours. I think the musicians are in the lounge.”

“Thanks. I’ll just go find them.” Kris walked out and bumped into Adam who was coming out of the studio.

“Hi, you sounded great in there.”

Adam just looked at Kris. Kris shifted, “When is the album going to be complete?”

“Why did you stand me up? You could have called, you know.”

Kris looked down, “I couldn’t get away from the party and then I was tired. I thought our plans were tentative.”

“Were you just busy or did you decide WE weren’t a good idea? I’d rather not be led on.”

Kris looked at Adam and saw the vulnerability in his eyes. Kris knew he should be quick and firm and just end it but he wanted Adam. All his conviction to do the right thing was going out the window. He moved closer to Adam and placed his hand on his chest. Adam jerked a little from the touch but kept his gaze steady.

Kris took a deep breath filling his nostrils with Adam’s faint cologne, “I think we are a really bad idea and I think we should stay away from each other but…” Kris ran his hand over Adam’s hardened nipple.

“Fuck,” Adam groaned just before kissing Kris and pushing him against the wall. Kris kissed him back and was getting turned on by Adam’s aggressive passion. It was unlike his experiences with Katy. Kris was pinned against the wall and Adam had his thigh between Kris’ legs pressed up against his erection. Adam started kissing Kris down his neck and leaving painful little bite marks. Kris was lost and readily gave himself up to Adam’s control. Adam lifted Kris wrists over his head against the wall which gave Kris the leverage he needed to rub himself against Adam’s thigh. It was so hot and Kris was hard as a rock.

“Adam! Let go of him. Are you fucking nuts!”

Kris was vaguely aware of Adam releasing him and falling to the ground. Kris was trying to clear his head as he heard Rick asking him if he was OK. Kris nodded and was just catching his breath as he heard Rick yelling at Adam.

“I’ve dealt with a lot of shit in my time but never someone trying to rape another artist in the fucking hallway. You need help. I’m calling the cops.”

Kris looked at Adam who just had his head in his hands looking completely dejected.

+++

Adam woke up and checked his cell phone. Kris hadn’t called or text him so it was officially a blow off. Adam putzed around the apartment and became hopeful when someone knocked on his door. Adam quickly checked himself in the mirror and opened the door expecting an apologetic Kris.

“What’s with the shit eating grin, babe?”

Adam felt crushed again, “I thought you were someone else.”

“Fuck you, too. Who did you think I was? Your lame pocket idol? You really need to move on dude this is getting beyond pathetic.”

“What do you want, Brad?”

“I came to visit and make sure you are still alive. You have been off the radar screen for weeks.”

“I am busy recording.” Adam watched Brad make himself at home on his couch. So much for a relaxing afternoon. “Is something wrong, Brad?”

“Joey won’t introduce me to his parents.”

“Perfect. You hate meeting parents.”

“Yeah but the point is he doesn’t WANT me to meet them. Don’t you think that is fucked up?”

“Do his parents know he is gay?”

“No, but I said I would pretend I was just a friend.”

Adam laughed, “Sorry, babe, but you are way too obvious to keep the cat in the bag. Give the guy a break, not that many people would have taken you back after cheating on several occasions.”

Brad smiled, “I don’t know if I should stay with a loser that would put up with that. Anyway, I am still pissed and think it would make me feel better to be passive-aggressive. Do you want fool around with me?”

“Um…no.” Adam needed to talk, “Kris blew me off last night.”

Brad looked at Adam, “Don’t you have to be dating to be blown off?”

“He said he was going to come over and then he didn’t; no call, nothing.”

“What is with your obsession? Did you even fuck him?”

“No-

“Of course you didn’t because he was too busy getting your ass thrown in jail. Adam, this is without a doubt the most self-destructive pursuit know to humankind. I am literally worried for your safety. You can do so much better. You are gorgeous and can be an amazing boyfriend that any guy would be lucky to have.”

Adam was comfortable on his pity pot, “You didn’t want me.”

“Oh contraire, I always want you; I just don’t like all your emotional baggage and rules. But, hey plenty of men like that shit. Kris Allen is so not worth you getting upset. The guy is a douche and if you gave him a ninth chance and he still fucked it up maybe it’s a sign.”

Adam laughed, “Yeah, a real subtle sign. Thanks, babe, now leave so I can do something useful with my day.”

Brad pouted, “Can I have a blow job at least so I can feel like I cheated?”

Adam rolled his eyes, “Why don’t you just tell Joey how you feel instead?”

“I’d rather get head.”

Adam agreed at some level it would feel good to be with Brad after getting blown off but that was a dark road. For once Adam was going to not act with his hormones in control. It helped that he had a hangover and doubted Brad would return the gesture but it was still progress.

Brad left and Adam spent the day doing laundry and cleaning his apartment. He went to bed early and hit the studio in the morning. Rick was there to oversee him recording a really beautiful ballad he had given him. Adam had appreciated the gesture and was pleasantly surprised to hear how good it was. By early afternoon, they were ready to record the vocals. Adam did a dry run and noticed someone had joined Rick in the sound booth. He recognized Kris and was mad. He had secretly hoped Kris had gotten into a car accident and that was why he hadn’t called. But, it was obvious he had just chosen not too. Adam just focused on his vocals.

Adam finished the song and was told to take a break before the play back. He didn’t see Kris in the booth and figured he had left. Adam walked out of the studio and collided with the very person he was hoping to avoid.

Kris smiled at him, “Hi, you sounded great in there.”

Is he really just complimenting me instead of apologizing to me. Adam just looked at Kris.

Kris shifted, “When is the album going to be complete?”

That fucker is really going to just ignore blowing me off and act as nothing happened. Hell no, he’s not, “Why did you stand me up? You could have called, you know.”

Kris looked down, “I couldn’t get away from the party and then I was tired. I thought our plans were tentative.”

“Were you just busy or did you decide WE weren’t a good idea? I’d rather not be led on.”

Adam needed resolution one way or another. Adam was surprised as he felt Kris’ hand on his chest. It felt like an electrical current was passing through his body as he stared at Kris.

“I think we are a really bad idea and I think we should stay away from each other but…” Adam felt Kris’ hand graze over his hardened nipple which sent the blood out of his brain straight into his cock. Not good.

“Fuck,” Adam groaned and against every principle and instinct of self-preservation, Adam pinned Kris to the wall and started ravishing him. Adam couldn’t believe he still felt as hot for Kris as he felt the first time he touched his body. He still felt that electricity he experienced on that fateful day when he filled in for Eva and gave Kris Allen a massage. Adam knew he was being aggressive but Kris was responding passionately and Adam could feel the heat between them. Adam could not help marking Kris and was surprised when Kris arched into him pumping against Adam’s thigh. Kris was a hot little pocket, alright. Adam was envisioning taking him when he heard a chilling voice.

“Adam! Let go of him. Are you fucking nuts!”

Adam froze and immediately released Kris. Kris seemed unprepared for Adam’s sudden release and collapsed to the ground. Adam turned to an irate, disgusted Rick and realized how bad it must have looked.

“I’ve dealt with a lot of shit in my time but never someone trying to rape another artist in the fucking hallway. You need help. I’m calling the cops.” Adam’s blood chilled as he noticed Kris was not saying anything. He was going to leave Adam out to dry again. Adam just became resigned to the fact that he was going to bear the brunt of it and probably get arrested again. Feeling tears forming, Adam just put his head in his hands and hoped he could maintain some shred of dignity. A few seconds later he heard a soft voice,

“He didn’t attack me, Rick.”

“Kris, you don’t have to stick up for him. I know you don’t like scandals but-“

“-Rick, it was a mutual kiss. He wasn’t doing anything I didn’t want him to do.”

Adam saw Rick’s face transform to shock and then anger, “Kris, for chrissake you are in the hallway of a major studio not to mention it is costing the label over $600 an hour to record this fucking album.”

Adam tried to deflect some of Rick’s anger from Kris and offered lamely, “You did say to take a break.”

“Yeah, well I didn’t mean to go in the hallway to make out with America’s golden boy. Are you two planning to go public with this?"

Kris looked down, “No.” Adam felt a small stab in his heart. Great, the best he could hope for was being Kris’ dirty little secret. Well, not ideal but perhaps workable.

Rick responded to Kris' reply, “Then I suggest you leave that shit to the privacy of your own homes. Kris, Perez is convinced you are gay and is chomping at the bit to get evidence. At this rate you will be outed before Wednesday. Adam, get back in the studio and Kris go home.”

Adam looked at Kris and offered a small smile. Kris was looking down somberly and then winked at Adam before turning and leaving. Adam let out the breath he was holding and was relieved to not be going to the joint for attempted rape.

Rick looked at him, “You must be one hell of a lay that Kris Allen keeps jeopardizing his million dollar career. Both of you need to chill out and be a hell of a lot more discreet. Come on, lover boy, and lets finish up this track.”

Adam went back in the studio feeling elated. Kris had finally stuck up for him.


	16. Chapter 16

Convoluted. Kris went back to his house and relaxed. He was glad he had spoke up but was not happy that he weakened in his resolve not to ruin Adam’s chance at love. Maybe he needed to find out more about Brad. Perhaps, he wasn’t Adam’s soul mate. If he was, then Kris would bow out gracefully but if he wasn’t…Kris would pursue him. Kris decided to enlist Jake’s help. At first Jake was reluctant since it seemed like a creepy thing to do. Kris appealed to him,

“I have been pretty bad to this guy and I want to make it up to him. I think his friend might be using him and I don’t want to see him hurt.”

“Mr. Allen, I am not an idiot. You want me to spy on this guy’s friend and find out if they are together, right?”

“Well, yeah but I also want to know if he is a good guy.”

“Why don’t you just ask Adam? This has disaster written all over it.”

“You were a CIA agent, this is easy.”

“I spied in defense of the country this is spying to get you laid. The goal is not quite so lofty.”

Kris cringed a little at the bald statement, “Please, Jake. I want to be with Adam but if he has this great guy I don’t want to get in the middle.”

Jake just shook his head, “Ok, I’ll see if I can find anything out but I am not doing anything illegal or extreme.”

Kris felt satisfied that at least he could try and do the right thing. His phone buzzed and saw a text from Adam, Done 4 2day. R U free?

Kris sighed and texted back, No, Jason’s here and early day 2morrow.

OK call me when u r free.

OK, Kris didn’t like lying again but it was for Adam’ good besides he really did have an early morning ahead.

The next morning Kris selected a personal assistant after interviewing three applicants. He decided to go with an open minded, high energy girl in her late twenties named Jade. She seemed a little alternative but very efficient and Jason liked her the best. Kris did two radio station interviews and caught a red eye to New York. He spent two days doing TV shows, radio station interviews and some fan related events. He arrived back in LA exhausted. Jake picked him up at the airport,

“Did you find anything out about Brad?”

“The guy seems OK. He doesn’t have a criminal record and he seems to share a lot of mutual friends with Adam.” Jake hesitated, “He and Adam spent some time together. Maybe you should ask Adam was his relationship is with this Brad.”

Kris looked at Jake like he had mamde an insane suggestion, “What did they do together?”

“They went to a couple clubs and Brad stayed at Adam’s place a couple nights.”

“Did they look like they were a couple?”

Jake looked away, “Mr. Allen, I am not really comfortable with this type of spying. Look, they were hanging on each other in the club and seemed to enjoy each other’s company.”

Kris was jealous and berated himself for being jealous. He wanted to justify pursuing Adam and grasped at straws,

“Did it look like Adam was unhappy or settling?”

Jake stared at Kris, “Are you really asking me that? I have no idea what Adam was thinking my guess is he wasn’t. Look, they were at a club, starting making out all hot and heavy and then went back to Adam’s apartment. I thought the end result was rather obvious so I went home. The next night they met up with friends and went to Karaoke bar. I had some personal business so I could not tail them all night. I did drive by Adam’s place at 4am and saw Brad’s car there. You do realize this is stalking. You literally are having me stalk this guy. No disrespect intended but don’t you think this is borderline insanity?”

“No borders about it. I’m sorry for asking you to do this but I can’t afford to risk my career for something that might not work or for someone that is using me.”

“Alright, Mr. Allen, but I still get a bad feeling about this. I will dig around a little more.”

“Thanks, Jake. I am not going out anymore tonight so you can head out after you drop me off.”

Kris went in his house and poured himself a scotch. He sat on the couch and just drank. On his third scotch he picked up his cell and drunk dialed,

“Kris? Are you back in LA?”

“Do you love him?”

“What?”

“Brad. Are you and Brad in love?”

“Are you drunk dialing me again?”

“Maybe. I know he spent the night with you a couple days ago.”

Adam paused, “How do you know that?”

Kris froze, even in his drunken state he knew he fucked up. “Jake saw you at a club and mentioned it to me.”

“Jake, your straight laced bodyguard goes to gay dance clubs?”

Kris cringed about lying more, “He is a closet homosexual.”

Adam laughed, “You two must bond really well.”

“What are you doing right now?”

“Standing in my bedroom, naked picking out clothes for tonight.”

“Wish I was there.”

“Mm, if you were here I wouldn’t waste my time getting dressed. So, I doubt you called me for phone sex, what do you want?”

“I wanted to hear your voice, have you tell me Jake had it wrong and you had been pining for me.”

“Well, two out of three ain’t bad.”

Kris smiled, “You were pining?”

“Pining and fantasizing,” Adam laughed richly, “You were very sexy in my head.”

Kris felt himself hardened and opened his pants, “Really what was I doing?”

“You were laying beneath me writhing as my fingers pressed into your body opening you.” Kris grabbed himself, “As my fingers scissored you open you arched up begging in that sexy voice of yours, ‘Fuck me, Adam, fuck me now.’ I tried to enter you slow but your need was too great and you pulled me into you hard.” Kris was stroking himself in earnest to Adam’s words and felt himself on the edge. “I complied and started thrusting into you harder and faster with each moan you released. Then, just as I got close I grabbed your throbbing cock and stroked you until you came, you squirted your hot semen all over my chest. Your orgasm pushed me over the edge and caused me to come deep inside you, filling you up with my cum. Mm, it was hot, very hot.”

Kris lost it and moaned into the phone as he came. He had never had phone sex before and was once again sad at what he had been missing. Adam was obviously a pro. Kris regained his composure and heard Adam giggling and talking,

“That sounded like a good orgasm. You are so sexy, Kris.”

“It was good. I never did anything like this before not even with a girl.”

“Hopefully, that was only the start of the firsts I get to do to you. Make sure you call me when you sober up so we can get together?” Kris heard banging on Adam’s end, “Shit, I gotta go. Call me so I can give you that massage.”

+++

Well, that was rather a curt text and definitely not encouraging further contact. Adam sighed thinking Kris was a prickly thing and pursuing him was going to be wrought with heartache. Adam decided to back off and just give Kris room to decide what he wanted. Adam fought the urge to call Kris the next day and was sad that he didn’t call him. He had read in the blogs that Kris was going to New York the next day to make some appearances.

Brad came over the next day. He was being dramatic,

“Joey dumped me. Really dumped me, that bastard was crushing on another cop and found out the guy like him. You have to help me save face.”

Adam cringed at the thought of A Brad scheme, “Help you how?”

“Show him I don’t care and actually was cheating on him. You have to make like we are a couple and you are totally in love with me.”

“No way. Just move on.”

“Adam, its about pride. You never let them see you fall apart.”

“I didn’t do that to you.”

“I know and I was embarrassed for you. Now come on you owe me from bailing your ass out of jail.”

“I paid that back by blowing you and giving you a massage. Try again.”

Brad got on his knees and crawled toward Adam and kissed his feet. He looked up at Adam with puppy dog eyes, “Please, baby, I need you to help me.”

Adam sighed, “I know I ma going to regret this. OK, Brad just get off your knees before I get turned on.”

Brad licked his lips, “Maybe we I can blow you to solidify the deal.”

Adam moved back as he felt his cock harden. “Don’t push it. Where are we going to act out our little show?”

Brad got up and got back to business, “Joey always goes to Rage on Tuesdays, so lets go there an act all lovey-dovey.”

Adam figured no one would see him at such an uncool club so no harm, no foul. Adam and Brad got done and arrived at the club around eleven. They were clearly the most stylish couple and the thought of being spotted somewhere so unfashionable. It would be worse than having his mug shot on the internet. They settled in at one of the tables lined up along a long, padded, vinyl bench and ordered chocolate martinis. Brad moved closer to Adam and put his hand on Adam’s thigh,

“There is Joey with his boyfriend. I can’t believe he dumped me for that”

Adam looked over and saw Joey dressed in leather chaps with jeans and a muscle t-shirt. He was with smaller guy sporting a James Dean look. Adam laughed,

“You are jealous of that? Sorry for your life, Brad.”

“Shut-up and start sucking my face.”

Adam tried to stop laughing as Brad put on a show of kissing him. Adam just went with it.

“Hello, Brad. I am surprised to see you here I thought this place was beneath you.” Joey was standing there with his new boyfriend hanging on his arm.

“Yeah, well Adam insisted and I couldn’t disappoint him.” Adam was outraged that Brad would suggest such a thing and even more mortified that Joey believed him. Brad continued, “Is your friend a celebrity impersonator?” Adam bit his tongue not to laugh.

Joey rolled his eyes, “Don’t be bitchy, Brad. This is Martin and he is a police officer.”

“I feel safer already. Hello Martin, this is my very good friend Adam.”

Adam said hello. Martin smiled at Adam, “Adam Lambert, right? Are you still stalking Kris Allen?”

Adam instantly took a dislike to Martin, “Well, I had to stop after the restraining order. Plus, I decided to get back with Brad, here.”

Martin looked at Brad and laughed, “You know you look a lot like Kris Allen. Best of both worlds, huh Adam?”

Brad glared at Martin and Adam could tell Brad was considering getting into a cat fight. Adam pulled Brad on his lap, “Actually, Brad is much prettier. It was nice meeting you.” Adam just started kissing Brad’s neck and put his had on Brad’s crotch. Adam heard Joey and Martin walk away. Adam bit Brad’s neck and pulled back,

“That was fun.”

“What a fucking asshole! I don’t like Kris Allen.” Brad turned around and straddled Adam, “My ego hurts. Make me feel better.” Brad started grinding into Adam and kissing him. Adam’s body immediately responded and he returned Brad’s kisses passionately.

“Keep your eyes open. I couldn’t handle it if you called me Kris.”

Adam looked at Brad and saw a vulnerability he hadn’t seen in years. “Come on, lets go back to my place and I’ll try and make you feel better.”

“Really?”

“Come on.” Adam guided Brad out of the club and to his car. Brad was all over him the whole car ride to his apartment and once inside Brad was unstoppable. Adam, a slave to his hormones as usual, happily complied with Brad’s needs. They stayed up late drinking and fucking. Adam woke up to the sight of Brad drooling on his chest. Fuck, this was a mistake. The last thing he needed was a new complication in his life. Brad seemed to wake and opened his eyes to look at Adam.

“Morning, lover.”

“Good morning, Brad.”

Brad sat up and moaned, “Ow, I guess I’m not use to you anymore.”

“Brad-“

“Adam, please don’t start the regret speech until I have had coffee. Is there any reason you can’t fuck and just wake up satiated like the rest of the world?”

Adam laughed and got up. Brad whistled, “Why don’t you take that sexy body of yours into the kitchen and brew me some coffee.”

Adam went in the kitchen and made a pot of coffee. He jumped in the shower and came out to find Brad drinking coffee. Brad smiled,

“So are we had the point we can be friends with benefits or are you still too hung up on me?”

“I don’t know but it was kind of good.”

“Of course it’s good. The sex was always the best part of our relationship. We should have been just been fuck-buddies instead of best friends,” Brad winked, “I gotta go, babe. If you start freaking out about this later, just call…Cassidy.”

Brad left and Adam went to dinner with Rick. Halfway through the meal Rick explained that Adam needed to keep whatever relationship he had with Kris private. He also warned Adam that the label would do whatever was necessary to make money. He needed to stay focused until he proved himself to be a money maker.

“Once you have a hit single and a platinum album, you can go public. But for now, Adam don’t blow your dreams on a good lay.”

“Don’t worry, I think Kris has had second thoughts. Either way we will keep it on the down low.”

Adam finished the dinner and was happy that his first single would be released in two weeks. Brad came over later and they just watched movies and fell asleep early. The next day he went back to the studio to finish the album. After eight hours of recording, he went home and showered. He had agreed to meet some friends at an art gallery opening. As he started to pick out his clothes his cell rang and was surprised to see Kris calling. He had drunk dialed Adam once again jealous over him being with Brad. Adam questioned how Kris knew what he had been doing or who he had been with in his absence. It seemed a little creepy since Adam wasn’t sure he believed the story about Jake being a closet case. However, even if it was a lie at this point that was the least of their problems. Halfway through the conversation, something changed and Adam found himself getting Kris off with phone sex. Adam loved hearing Kris jerk himself off and thought it was incredibly cute that Kris had never done that before. The guy really was just too adorable for his own good. Adam hoped he called him when he sobered up because he really wanted to see him.


	17. Chapter 17

Metamorphosis. Kris woke up the next day slightly hung-over and a little embarrassed. He had drunk dialed again and masturbating on the phone. Jade was downstairs going through his mail. She smiled,

“Good morning, Mr. Allen, would you like some coffee?”

“Please and call me Kris.”

“Ok, Kris, Jason will be here in an hour to discuss your publicity events.”

“Do you know if I have anything tonight or tomorrow?”

Jade hesitated, “I think you have something in the early evening and then something the next morning. Jason will be able to confirm but after that I think you are jam packed.”

Kris needed to make sure he built time into his schedule. He had felt much better when he was working out, getting massages and just having down time. Plus, he wanted to see Adam. Kris went upstairs and decided to make good on his promise and called Adam.

“Hey, rockstar, you are up early,” Adam joked upon answering.

“It is ten am, not that early. Big night last night?”

“Late night but not all that big. Actually, your orgasm was the highlight.”

Kris blushed, “Sorry for the drunk dial.”

“I am just happy you called. So to what do I owe the pleasure this morning? Are you calling me up just to apologize or make plans?”

“Maybe we can get together later tonight.”

“I’d like that. What time?”

“I will call you after my meeting with Jason and my new PA, Jade.”

“OK, sweetie, I need to go back to sleep.”

Kris had his meeting and found out his brother and bandmates shanghaied his schedule and set up an overnight camping trip starting at 4 am the next morning. Kris normally would love the diversion but he wanted to see Adam. He called his brother, Daniel.

“Why didn’t you ask me first instead of going through my staff?”

“Because you have been freaky lately and didn’t want to give you an opportunity to decline. You are in need of a break. I spoke to Katy the other day and she was concerned you were stressing out. The hiking trip will do you good.”

Kris hesitated and then decided to be honest, “I was sort of hoping to see someone tonight.”

“Take him on the trip. Besides, I want to meet the man that is tempting my brother to switch teams.”

Kris cringed at his crude terms and was caught off guard that Daniel knew about Adam. He shouldn’t be surprised though since the world had read about and Katy probably confided in Daniel. Kris decided to ignore the innuendo,

“I don’t know if I am ready for him to meet the family. Besides, I don’t think he is much of a nature buff.”

“Well, whatever but you are going so get over it. Make sure you bring cold weather gear because we are going up pretty high and there will be snow.”

Kris was torn between wanting to see Adam and being scared of bringing him along. He decided to ask Jake who was also going to accompany them.

“Jake, do you know the trail we are going on? Do you think Adam could make the hike?”

Jake shrugged, “I don’t know it specifically but I saw it on map and seemed doable. He doesn’t seem all that athletic but he is tall so he can probably keep up. Besides, maybe if he goes you two can talk and you can stop sending me on insane stalking assignments.”

Kris still wasn’t decided but he needed to let Adam know he couldn’t see him that night like he had promised. He had a charity dinner until nine and then would need to sleep. He called Adam,

“Hi Kris, what time are you coming over?”

Kris heard the excitement in Adam’s voice and felt instantly guilty, “About tonight-“

“You are blowing me off again?” Adam sounded crushed.

“Er…tomorrow I am going hiking overnight with friends and we are starting at four in the morning.”

Adam was silent for a few seconds, “Hiking?”

“Yeah. We are going to San Jacinto.” Kris decided to test the waters, “Why do you like hiking? You could join us if you want.”

“Really?” Adam answered enthusiastically.

“Sure. The more the merrier,” Kris tried to sound sincere since he was really apprehensive about how is band would react to Adam.

“Can we share a sleeping bag?”

Kris laughed, “Well…we need to be discreet but we can share my tent.”

“Then I am in. What do I need to bring?”

Kris was surprised and a little concerned “Adam, it is going to be long and hard. Have you ever hiked before?”

“Please, I am from California. Of course I have hiked before. Relax, I will wear waterproof eyeliner. I need to call Rick but I am pretty sure we are out of the studio until next week.”

“OK, we will pick you up at about a quarter after four. Call me if you have any questions about packing. We are going to be gone for two days.”

“I’ll be ready. I can’t wait to meet your friends.”

Kris cringed a little, “It is my band mates, my brother Daniel and his friends. I am not sure how to say this without being an asshole so I’ll just be direct. I don’t want them to suspect we, you know like each other, so I need you to act...”

“Less gay?”

“Sorry but yeah kinda.”

“That is insulting but I will try and refrain from coming on to everyone.” Adam laughed, “Seriously, I’ll be the epitome of discreet. They won’t suspect anything but we are still gonna share a tent, right?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you in the morning.”

Kris was worried that Adam would not be able to keep up on the hike and would clash with the others. He also knew his band mates were sort of like frat boys and his brother’s friends were basically homophobic. Kris called Daniel,

“Dan, Adam is coming make sure you and your friends don’t pick on him.”

“Relax, bro. We won’t be mean to your girlfriend.”

“It was your idea. I mean it, be nice to him and for the record we are just friends. Just because he is gay doesn’t mean we are together.”

“Sorry, my mistake; you just don’t usually make out with your other friends.”

Kris just hung up and hoped this wasn’t another catastrophic error. He spent the rest of the night packing and making sure all his gear was ready to go. Kris’ alarm went off at 0330 which was way too early. He called Adam fifteen minutes later to make sure he was up.

Adam answered way too chipper, “Goodmorning, Kris. Are we still going?”

“Yeah, we’ll be there in a half hour. Are you ready?”

“Always. See you soon”

Daniel and his friends arrived a couple minutes later. Kris noticed, Johnny, a former drill sergeant and current asshole was among them and wished he could uninvite Adam. This was probably going to be way to much testosterone even for an all male hiking expedition. Kris really hoped they behaved around Adam and it didn’t end in a complete disaster.

+++

Adam hung up the phone excited and immediately called Brad.

“What do you want bitch? The sun is still up.”

“Brad, I need your help. Do you still have all that hiking crap from when you dated that forest ranger?”

“Yeah, somewhere.”

“Find it. You have to help me get ready for a big overnight hiking trip.”

“Babe, why would you even want to go hiking? I tried it for a few hours and it was annoying. Hey, you used to complain when we hiked five minutes to get stoned at the Hollywood sign.”

“People change. Besides, you will just lecture me if I tell you. So will you lend me equipment? I have to go to the studio for a few hours so I will only have enough time to shop for food. What should I buy to eat?”

Brad seemed to think, “ Yeah I will hook you up. Buy some trail mix, turkey jerky and cliff bars. I have a flask you can borrow so you can bring some booze. This hike does involve a cute man right?”

“Of course. I’ll come by around seven tonight.”

“Alright, I’ll hook you up but you owe me a sensual massage”

“No, I don’t. This payback for me going to that pathetic club a couple nights ago and I did a hell of a lot more than massage you.”

“True. OK, see you later, babe.”

Adam went to the studio and told Rick he needed a couple days off. Luckily, Rick said he was catching a redeye that night anyway so Adam could disappear for a few days. Adam headed over to Brad’s after hitting Trader Joes for some water and snack food. He arrived at eight o’clock in the evening.

Brad gave him a martini and sat down on his couch.

“Spill, bitch. Who are you hiking with?”

Adam sighed, “Kris invited me. He is going with his friends and he asked me to go and I said yes. This is a chance to get to know each other in a different setting.”

“Do you have a fucking death wish? They are probably taking your ass to some remote place to beat you or kill you? I bet the label set this up to eliminate their golden boy’s detractor. The last few get togethers with Mr. Idol didn’t exactly end well.”

“You are paranoid and just being surly. Maybe he is trying to come out to his friends.”

“Earth to Adam he is never going to come out and I am sure this is going to end badly. But since you insist on fucking up your life, I will be a good friend and still lend you my shit.” Brad kissed him short on the lips and produced a powder blue backpack with rhinestones across which said ‘Sparkly’.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me? I can’t show up on this manly hiking expedition with a bedazzled fucking backpack. This is beyond flamboyant.”

Brad looked hurt, “Fuck you. I didn’t ask to lend this to you. You asked me, remember? What are you afraid they will think you are gay? Oh I see not only does this guy fuck with your life, your freedom but he has managed to make you ashamed of being yourself. Are you planning on going back in the closet too? Congratulations on sinking to your lowest level yet!”

Adam was irritated at Brad’s words but felt bad about hurting his feelings by reacting so negatively to his backpack. It was his own fault for waiting until eight at night to pick up his equipment. All the stores were closed so it was either Brad’s sparkly backpack or his leather messenger bag.

“I’m sorry, Brad. I appreciate your help.”

“No you don’t. You are just saying that because you need my bag.”

“Can I take off the rhinestones?”

“You do, bitch, and I will scratch your eyes out. Just tell them some fag lent you the pack and then maybe you all can look at some playboy magazines and talk sports to one another. I swear his douchieness is rubbing off on you. Anyway, I put some essentials I thought you might need.”

Adam went through the back and was happy to see a first aid kit, grooming supplies, sex supplies, headlamp, freeze dried food, a smurf sleeping bag, and duck tape. Duck Tape?

“Why do I have duck tape?”

“You always need duck tape; everybody takes duck tape. Besides, you can tie them up with it when they try to gay bash you for having a rhinestone back pack, you jerk.”

Adam laughed and pulled Brad onto his lap, “You must have looked gorgeous when you hiked in this.”

“Of course, I did. I had on indigo cargo pants with an off white parker. Now you are trying to get on my good side so I lend you my flask. I see right through you, Adam Lambert.” Brad ran his tongue around Adam’s ear and put his hand on his crotch.

Adam stilled his hand and brought to his lips kissing the inside of Brad’s wrist, “Babe, I have to get up in like two hours so I have to go. Thanks for the gear.”

Brad got up, “Take your cell phone and carry your driver’s license so we can ID your battered corpse. Seriously, if you get a weird vibe, get out of there.”

“OK, I’ll be back in two days. If I am not, then you can freak out and send a search party. Can I have the flask?”

Brad gave him a flask filled with vodka martinis. Adam went home and packed the rest of his clothes. He wasn’t totally clueless and knew to take a few pairs of socks and to waterproof one set of clothes. Luckily, California was warm so he wouldn’t need much more than a sweatshirt for the night. Adam was too excited to sleep. He finally dozed at midnight and woke at 0300 to get done. It didn’t hurt to look nice and make a good impression on the first day.

Adam got done and waited. He went outside about when Kris said they would be arriving and saw Jake pulling up in an SUV with another in trace. Adam smiled and heard laughing from the trailing car as he walked toward Kris’ vehicle.

“What the fuck is on his pack some kind of high tech reflectors? Is that SOS?”

“No, it says spar-sparkly. I think its…its glitter.” Adam almost laughed at their tone of disgust.

He heard a more authoritative voice come from Kris’ car,

“No, I think he has been bedazzled, my daughter does that to all her shit.”

Kris got out of the car smiling and helped Adam load his pack in the back. He laughed and patted Adam on the back, “Come on, Sparkles.”

Adam laughed too, “Too much?”


	18. Chapter 18

Camaraderie. At first, Kris was embarrassed as they pulled up to Adam’s apartment and he noticed the powder blue backpack but when he heard his brother’s friends’ remarks, he became angry. He immediately got out of the car to show support for the man he invited. Kris’ anger faded when he saw Adam’s bright smile and heard his rich laughter. Adam gave him the passenger seat and climbed in the back with his guitarist and drummer. Kris made quick introduction and then everyone but Jake took a nap. Kris woke up to hear Adam and Jake chatting about Europe. Adam was a good conversationalist and seemed to hang on everyone’s word. Kris relaxed more knowing Adam was probably charismatic enough to win over his staunchest enemies.

They arrived at San Jacinto and drove up to the base which was at about 7,000 feet and they would be climbing to a camp site at about 12,000. They got out of the vehicles. Kris introduced Adam to Daniel and his friends. Of course Daniel’s military buddy, Johnny looked Adam up and down,

“Are you sure you can make this hike? It is pretty rigorous and treacherous. Do you have cold weather gear?”

Jake looked at Kris, “You did tell him the hike was at altitude, didn’t you?”

“I told him where we going.” Kris answered defensively. Hopefully, Adam had looked it up online. Jake shook his head and just went to sign them in.

Adam looked Johnny in the eye, “I brought supplies and I will be fine, thanks for asking,” Adam smiled. They began their ascent. They were moving fast so Kris was quiet. He heard Adam chatting nonstop with his band. Two hours later the temperature had dropped significantly. Kris noticed Adam was in just a T-shirt and went near him.

“Do you have anything warmer in your pack?”

“I have a sweatshirt but I don’t want to get it wet. I’m OK.”

“I have an extra thermal shirt I usually sleep in but I won’t need it.”

Adam looked at him gratefully, “OK, if you don’t need it.” They stopped and Adam put on Kris’ polypropylene top and smiled, “You have made my day, Kris.”

“Sorry, I didn’t give you more details about the hike.”

“It’s OK. I am having a great time.”

Three hours later tempers were rising and people were getting snippy. Adam seemed unfazed and just seemed to soak up the natural beauty around them. Kris just focused on the trail. Daniel fell into step behind him,

“Your stalker is not very scary. He may look intimidating but he’s really a sweet guy.”

“I know. He is not the stalking type. Did Katy tell you I lied?”

Daniel laughed, “No, she just said the media misread the situation. What really happened? Are you gay now?”

“No!” Kris could only get to a place where he accepted he was attracted to Adam but believed it was the exception to the rule. “I don’t like men but I guess I like Adam.”

Daniel shook his head, “Adam is definitely a man. I mean he does wear makeup and has a girlie pack but I wouldn’t quite classify him as feminine. Is he a cross dresser? Was he dressed as a girl when you met him? Is this like Madame Butterfly and you fell in love before you knew”

Kris just looked at Daniel, “Shut the fuck up. I am not gay, ok.”

Daniel laughed and then got serious, “I think everyone likes Adam and I told my friends his stalking was a publicity stunt. That is the latest rumor, by the way, so you two might want to stay discreet. Adam is masculine enough to keep them guessing and I think its best.”

“Why are you friends with such close minded people?”

“Bro, your friends aren’t so different.”

Kris grudgingly agreed. They had been hiking for nearly seven hours and decided to take a food break. Kris had peanut butter and jelly while he saw Adam breakout a turkey and gouda sandwhich. Adam smiled,

“You want half? I see you eyeing my grub.”

Kris smiled back and happily took half of Adam’s sandwich. After one bite he was glad he had taken Adam. Kris looked at Adam concerned,

“How are you doing?”

“Good. I think I definitely should have dressed differently and I wish I had those hiking poles you guys are using but Johnny made me a walking stick which helps.” Adam showed Kris the makeshift walking stick that had been cut and cleaned from a thick branch. Kris laughed at Adam’s ability to bring people to his side. Adam shrugged,

“I think Johnny thought I was pathetic enough to help or he was tired of looking at me on my ass all the time. Are you sorry you invited me?”

Kris smiled, “No, because you are making this a lot more fun. I would have taken you for a whiner.”

“I never whine, I sometimes beg but never whine.” Adam winked.

They finally made it to the camp site. The temperature was about twenty degrees and the wind was kicking. To everyone’s dismay, Jake announced it was too windy for a fire and they should just set up the tents and wait it out. They dug out a circle in the snow before setting up the tents. Kris saw Adam take out a silver item from his back pack which looked like duck tape. Kris went over,

“What are you doing?”

“Making gloves. I am going to wrap tape around a pair of socks and make snow proof mittens. I am impressed Brad was right about taking duck tape.” Kris helped him and they all got to work. Jake came over,

“Adam is staying in your tent, right?”

“Er, yeah. Were you expecting to stay in my tent?”

“No, I just want to make sure I know where everyone is.”

Once their tents were up it started to flurry so everyone went inside to wait out the weather. The tent was small. Kris laid out their sleeping bags with Adam’s spread out on the bottom and his on the top. Kris laughed at seeing his smurf sleeping bag. He was cold and noticed Adam was shivering uncontrollably,

“Adam, we need to get warm and dry. Get undressed and get in the sleeping bags. We can use our body heat.”

Adam smirked, “W-we ar-are ge-get-ti-ting na-naked? I li-like th-that.”

Kris quickly stripped and climbed in the cocoon he built. He watched as Adam struggled with his clothes but couldn’t seem to get his fingers to work. Kris laughed,

“Come here and let me help you.” Adam came over and Kris sat up and quickly helped him unzip everything and pull off his clothes. Kris guided him under the sleeping bag and let Adam pull him against his body so they were spooning.

“You are like an ice cube.” Kris started rubbing Adam’s arms that were around him and using his body heat to warm him up. Adam put his hands between Kris’ thighs and smiled innocently,

“I am avoiding frostbite.”

Kris could feel Adam start to warm up and then felt Adam become aroused. He became very aware that they were naked and Adam’s growing erection was right up against his ass. Kris was nervous and it felt uncomfortably intimate. Adam moved one of his hands to Kris stomach and began running his fingers across Kris’ stomach. Kris flinched and giggled.

“I forgot how ticklish you are,” Adam ran his tongue around his ear. “Laying here like this with you made the whole day worthwhile.” Adam kissed Kris’ neck. Kris pressed back into Adam which caused Adam to moan. Adam moved the hand still on Kris thigh up to his manhood and started lightly stroking Kris. It felt great and Kris could not stop himself from thrusting into Adam’s hand.

“You are so hot. I hope this storm lasts all night,” Adam whispered in his ear.

“Me too.” Kris pressed back again and could feel the moisture of Adam’s pre-cum dripping near is entrance. Kris stiffened. Adam noticed,

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“I –I don’t want you to…”

“Ssh. I’m not going to do anything you don’t want. Besides, I don’t think it’s a good idea to have your first time while hiking up a fucking mountain. Relax and just let me make you feel good.”

Kris listened and Adam started making him feel really good his hands. Kris came with a loud moan and Adam kissed him and pulled him in close. Between, the rigorous workout, the warmth of their cocoon and Kris’ post-orgasmic relaxation, Kris fell asleep minutes later. He never heard Adam get up a couple hours later.

+++

Adam had never heard of San Jacinto but just assumed it would be like hiking in the Santa Monica hills. He realized his mistake as they drove up to the base of a snow capped mountain. Shit. I really am not packed right. All well, I am not going to be the Debbie-downer of the group. Adam kept his mouth shut as they headed up the mountain. At first Adam was concerned that he was not going to get along with the group, but as the morning wore on he found common ground with them all. Even the military guy had been nice enough to carve Adam a walking stick.

Adam was cold and struggling but he stayed positive and thought it was pretty cool to be climbing up a mountain. It was also great spending time with Kris in such a surreal setting. By the time they made camp, the weather had become significantly worse. He was a little worried but no one seemed too concerned so he just focused on trying to help Kris set up the tent.

“Adam, we need to get warm and dry. Get undressed and get in the sleeping bags. We can use our body heat.”

Adam smirked, “W-we ar-are ge-get-ti-ting na-naked? I li-like th-that.” Not the smoothest voice and the shivering probably wasn’t sexy but regardless they were getting naked. Yeah!

Adam watched Kris strip down and became immediately aroused. Frustratingly, his fingers were too frozen to operate properly and he could not get his clothes off. He was eternally grateful when Kris helped. He climbed in behind Kris and pulled him in close. It was a perfect fit. Having Kris come apart in his hands was just icing on the cake. After his orgasm, Kris immediately fell asleep and Adam soon followed. Adam awoke disoriented and smiled as he realized the warmth next to him was Kris. Unfortunately he really had to take a piss so he reluctantly got up, got dressed and quietly left the tent.

The storm had died down and Jake had made a fire. He saw Daniel’s friends, Kris’ drummer and Jake sitting by the fire.

Jake noticed Adam first, “Hey Adam, Kris out cold?”

“Yeah, he seems pretty beat.”

Johnny looked over, “Did you bring any alcohol?”

Adam was hoping to horde his stash but then again Johnny had carved him a walking stick, “I have vodka martinis.”

“You are a gift from the heavens. Break it out.”

Adam grabbed his pack and gave it to Johnny, “It is in the flask.” Adam quickly went to the tree line and relieved himself. He went back over and Johnny was taking very healthy gulps. Adam was sad to see his alcohol going somewhere other than down his own throat. Johnny passed it to Peter and Scott who also took healthy sips. Luckily when it got to Jake, he gave it back to Adam before heading to his tent. Adam grimaced when he realize there was barely a sip left. Peter produced another flask and said it was peppermint schnapps. Adam decided to pass on the substandard booze deciding a hangover would not help his hiking abilities.

“So Sparkles, how long have you been corrupting good, god-fearing men?” slurred Johnny.

Adam stiffened, “I don’t corrupt people.” Adam wished Jake was back.

“Really because before you came on the scene, Kris Allen was happily married. You see Adam you are the worst kind of Sodomite because you come in a pretty shell acting all sweet and innocent. But really you are just working for the devil and leading good souls astray. I like you Adam but you need to be stopped.” Johnny still had Adam’s pack and started going through it.

“Give me back my pack, Johnny.”

“Come get it, Sparkles.” Johnny pulled out the duck tape, “Is this for some kinky faggot sex?”

Adam was getting really nervous. A drunk Johnny did not appear to be a good Johnny and the other two men seemed on board with Johnny. Adam tried to grab his bag but Peter tripped him and he fell toward Johnny. Adam went to yell but Johnny taped his mouth and then his wrists. Adam was helpless and panicking. Adam also cursed Brad for his stupid idea of bringing duck tape.

“You must be something else to convert someone as straight as Kris Allen. Maybe I should try you out before I beat the shit out of you. Would you get off on that? I bet you like it rough, like an animal.”

Adam tried to pull away and then felt cold steel at his neck. FUCK! Things had just gone from really bad to deadly. Adam was freaked out and realized he was probably going to be raped and cut. He looked up and saw Jake come out of his tent. Adam had never been so happy to see anyone. Johnny looked at Jake,

“I am going to teach this sodomite a life altering lesson by fucking him and then carving the shit out of him.”

Jake looked at Adam and said coldly, “I’ll hold him down while you fuck him and then take my turn.”

Adam’s stomach turned as he realized there was no one coming to his aid. Maybe this was a set up, maybe Kris even knows what is happening. Maybe, I am never leaving this mountain alive.

Johnny seemed to think about it and then nodded. He pulled Adam up with the knife pressing into his throat and spoke to Jake, “Pull down his pants first, I bet he is aroused. Fags love being promiscuous; we will all take turns and maybe if we are rough enough we can fuck the gay out of him.”

Adam looked at the four eager men and could feel tears rolling down his cheeks. Jake just maintained a cold expression as he pulled Adam’s pants down. Jake grabbed Adam’s arms and Johnny lowered the knife. Once the knife was down Jake threw Adam aside and launched at Johnny. Adam watched as Jake launched into some impressive martial arts moves rendering the other helpless. He picked up Johnny’s knife and cut Adam loose. Adam quickly pulled up his pants just as Kris came out of his tent and looked at the scene,

“What is going on?”

Adam looked at Jake pleadingly to not say anything. Jake shrugged, “Johnny drank too much and we were trying to get him to his tent.”

Johnny seemed to wake up, “Fucking fag-“ Jake kicked him in the head pretending he had stumbled.

Kris grimaced at the impact, “Careful, Jake. That was his head.”

“Hmm. I guess I am more tired than I thought and it’s making me a bit clumsy. Well, I think we should all go to bed since we are going to start early in the morning.” Jake grabbed Adam’s pack and handed it to him, “Thanks for sharing your supplies.”

“Thanks for being a good man.”

Jake’s expression softened, “Get a good night sleep, tomorrow will be a long day.”

Adam followed Kris into the tent. He was freaked out but did not want to tell Kris. Kris undressed and climbed back into the cocoon and held the sleeping bag up as an invitation for Adam to join him. Adam reluctantly undressed and climbed in next to Kris. Kris pulled the cover over them and kissed Adam. Adam pulled away because he could not stand the thought of being touched, “I have a bad headache, is it OK if we just sleep?”

“Sure, make sure you drink water you may be dehydrated.”

“OK, goodnight.” Adam rolled over and couldn’t help but stiffen when Kris tried to snuggle. Kris seemed to get the hint and just turned over. He laid awake all night just feeling numb. The next day everyone was subdued and Adam just kept to himself. Kris had tried to engage him in conversation in the morning but quickly gave up when Adam was unresponsive. Adam knew Kris interpreted it as a blow-off but he needed to focus all his energy on not breaking down. They finally finished the hike and arrived back in LA at 7. Adam avoided Johnny and his cohorts. He did notice their bruises and Johnny’s black eye. Jake had tried to talk to him but Adam just brushed him off saying he was fine and it was no big deal. Once at his apartment Adam got out of the car and watched them drive away before falling apart. He collapsed inside his apartment and immediately dialed,

“Brad, I need you to come over. You were right,” Adam said desperately.

“Adam? I’ll be right there, baby. Are you OK?

“No, come fast.” Adam hung up and just sat on his floor letting all the pent up fear and rage well up. Brad arrived 15 minutes later and just held Adam for a while letting him cry. Adam hated being weak and feeling like the unloved, fat, pimply, outsider again. Brad could be an ass but a caring and loving ass.

“What happened? I knew that fucking douche bag was going to get you in trouble.”

“They attacked me. A couple of his brother’s friends and one of his band mates tried to hurt me. I was so scared and then I didn’t want anyone to know so only Kris’ bodyguard knows.”

“Good because either that asshole was in on it or he would have pushed you off a cliff to avoid the scandal of a hate crime. You should totally press charges. Are you hurt anywhere? You certainly smell pretty bad.”

“No,” Adam was having a hard time breathing, “The one guy held a knife to my throat and was going to rape me.”

Brad looked at Adam, “They held you had knife point? Baby, you have to go to the police.”

Adam shook his head, “The label would drop me. You can’t say anything.”

Brad helped Adam up, “OK. You are smelly, dirty and cold. Let’s get you in a warm bath. I’ll even come in there with you and help you scrub.”

Brad went in the bathroom and ran the water. Adam was exhausted from not sleeping, hiking 30 miles in two days and crying. He let Brad undress him and guide him in the bathtub. Brad climbed in behind him and wrapped his arms and legs around him. Brad’s familiar touch was relaxing and did not make him flinch like he had with Kris. In fact, he wanted more as Brad was washed his chest.

“Spend the night with me.”

“I won’t leave, babe. I’ll stay here as long as you need.”

“Not just stay over.” Adam turned his head and kissed Brad long and deep. Brad kissed him back and continued to wash him more intimately. The water was cooling so they decided to get out and head to the bedroom. Brad heard a knock and the door,

“I’ll get that, babe, it’s probably Cassidy. He wanted to stay at my place tonight so I told him to come here to pick up the key. You get in bed and I will be back in a minute to let you ravage me.”

Adam went in the bedroom and tried to wait patiently. After a few minutes, he decided Brad and Cassidy were gossiping and could take all night. Better to drop an obvious hint and move Cassidy along. Adam went out to say hello to Cassidy still with just a towel on. Hoping to drive the point home, he came up behind a similarly clad Brad standing at the door. Adam wrapped his arms around Brad and kissed his neck before looking up to greet Cassidy. Adam froze as he looked into hurt brown eyes.

“Kris?”


	19. Chapter 19

Oblivious. Kris woke up alone and wondered where Adam had gone. It was a little past midnight and the wind had died down. He could see the glow of a fire through the tent. Kris waited a few minutes than wrapped the sleeping bag around himself and went outside. He was confused by the scene before him. It appeared Johnny, Scott and Peter had been fighting, Jake looked out of breath and Adam was pale.

Kris had a feeling something was amok and asked, “What is going on?”

Jake shrugged after exchanging glances with Adam, “Johnny drank too much and we were trying to get him to his tent.”

Johnny seemed to wake but Jake stumbled and accidentally hit him in the head.

Kris grimaced at the impact, “Careful, Jake. That was his head.”

“Hmm. I guess I am more tired than I thought and it’s making me a bit clumsy. Well, I think we should all go to bed since we are going to start early in the morning.” Jake grabbed Adam’s pack and handed it to him, “Thanks for sharing your supplies.”

Kris led Adam back into the tent. Kris crawled back onto the smurf sleeping bag and spread his out holding it up for Adam to join him. Adam laid down at the edge of the makeshift bed. Kris tried to pull him closer and snuggle. Adam flinched and pulled away. Kris had a feeling Adam was mad because he fell asleep right after he came. It was rude not to reciprocate the favor so Kris understood Adam’s annoyance and decided to kiss Adam to initiate the payback. Adam pulled away suddenly claiming he had a headache. He was hurt Adam had rebuked his overture. Kris worried Adam was growing bored with his inexperience and reluctance to have full sex. Not knowing how to broach the subject, Kris just rolled over went to sleep.

The next day Adam was still cold toward Kris. Adam seemed in a bad mood and refused to supply anything more than one word answers. Kris just tried to respect his desire to keep to himself and left him alone. It seemed that everyone was subdued and ready to be go home. Adam was dropped off first and he just mumbled goodbye to everyone in the car and left. Daniel spoke up,

“I don’t think Adam liked hiking after all. He was in a much better mood yesterday.”

Kris defended him, “I didn’t warn him about the cold and I think he was dehydrated.”

They dropped off Scott, Kris’ drummer next. Daniel was going to crash at Kris’ house so they proceeded in that direction. It was only Kris and Daniel in the car with Jake driving.

“Aside from Adam not feeling well, what did you think of him?” Kris asked his brother.

“Seemed like a nice enough guy but a little rude. I think he had a chip on his block toward Johnny and Peter but-

Jake slammed on the breaks, “Your buddies Johnny and Peter should be in jail along with Scott. I sort of promised Adam not to say anything but I can’t keep quiet. Last night, they attacked Adam for being gay. Johnny held a knife to him, ducktaped him, and threaten to rape him. I think if I wasn’t there they would have gang raped him to “teach” him a lesson. Adam was subdued because he was scared out of his mind.”

Kris felt the blood pounding in his head, “When? What exactly happened? Why didn’t he say anything?”

“He was embarrassed or maybe he didn’t think anyone would be on his side. No offense, Mr. Allen, but he has been unfairly persecuted by the media for misunderstood events.”

“I need to make sure he is OK. We’ll drop you off, Daniel, and then I have to go see Adam.” Kris needed to make sure Adam was OK. He was angry that anyone had tried to hurt Adam but also sad that Adam didn’t confide in him. After they dropped off Daniel Kris directed his frustration and fear at Jake,

“You work for me you should have said something earlier. Why didn’t you?”

“It wasn’t my story to tell and frankly I wasn’t sure how you would react. It is not like your previous actions illustrated a willingness to endure difficulties on Adam’s behalf.”

Kris knew he was right, “Does Adam blame me for this?”

“I don’t know. He didn’t want to talk to me about it. If it were me, I’d blame you for being friends with such people and being the reason I was on the hiking trip in the first place. Actually, if I were him, I would have cut my losses right after you threw me to the paparazzi wolves.”

Kris laughed tightly, “Lucky for me, Adam is a much more forgiving person.”

“Mr.-Kris, be careful because what they did was pretty bad. Johnny said some nasty stuff and their intent to rape him was very clear.”

Kris became anxious, “Did they touch him or violate him?”

“They took his pants down while I held him.”

“You held him!”

“Kris, there were three of them and one had a weapon. I had to wait for an opportune moment and catch them off guard. I feel bad that it probably scared Adam more because he thought I was going to hold him down as they raped him. However, it would have helped neither of us if I fought back and lost.”

They got to Adam’s apartment. Kris told Jake to wait in case Adam wanted to be alone. Kris went up to the apartment and knocked on the door. He was surprised when a towel clad Brad answered the door.

“What do YOU want? Come to finish the job?”

“I came to see if Adam was alright.”

“He’s fine now get the fuck out of here. I am sick and tired of mopping up your mess. Every fucking time Adam gives you a chance you fuck him up. Not too mention each time it is exponentially worse.”

“This wasn’t my fault. I didn’t know.”

“Save your bullshit for someone who cares. I love that man in there and I am not going to let you destroy him. If you really like him, you would realize how bad you are for him. Shall I recap? First meeting-Adam loses his job and becomes a public pervert, second meeting-Adam gets locked up in jail, third meeting- he gets gaybashed. Really, the only thing left is his death so I don’t think I am going to let him see you a fourth time.”

“I am trying to make things right.”

“Really? Than try leaving him alone so he can have a pain free life.”

Kris hated Brad especially because he was right on some level. If Brad could make Adam happy…

“You really love him?”

“Yes and he loves me. You are just a shiny new toy and Adam unfortunately gets easily distracted. I was too jealous when we dated and I stupidly broke it off with the only man I ever loved. I want him back and I think he wants me.”

Kris could not place it but for some reason he had the feeling Brad wasn’t being truthful. Kris was going to question him more but Adam came over and Kris’ heart stopped as he watched Adam wrap his arms around Brad and kiss him. Adam was also in a towel so Kris could only assume they had been making love. Kris felt his heart breaking and for the first time wished he was someone else. He wished he were Brad and had Adam’s loving arms around him intimately kissing his neck. Kris looked into shocked blue eyes and heard Adam whisper his name in surprise.

“Kris?”

“Hi…er…I just wanted to see if you were OK. Jake told me a little bit of what happened.”

Adam immediately moved back from Brad and was obviously uncomfortable and spoke,

“I thought you were Cassidy. Brad was just-

Brad became furious and pushed Adam hard, “You mother fucker! I can’t believe you are going to make excuses to him for being with me. Could you make me feel anymore like sloppy seconds! Straight boy here doesn’t put out, you call Brad. Douche bag here gets your ass locked in prison, you call Brad. Retardo takes you on a hiking trip with a bunch of homophobes, and you call Brad. I am not a doormat Adam. The only reason I keep helping you is because I am an idiot and so in love with you. I want us to be a couple again.”

Brad had tears in his eyes. Kris felt guilty and empathetic to Brad. Adam seemed to just be staring at Brad with an unreadable expression. Brad was the one that had been there for Adam through the bad times. Kris didn’t deserve him and Brad did. Kris decided to do the right thing.

“Adam, I just wanted to make sure you were OK and if you want to go to the police I understand. I don’t know all the details but from what Jake told me it is totally unacceptable and I will support whatever you want to do. Well, you have company so I will go. Why don’t you just sleep on it and give me a call tomorrow. Goodnight, guys.” Kris tried to smile and headed back to Jake. He left with a heavy heart knowing he just lost the only key to his happiness.

+++

Adam was shocked to see Kris standing at the door which is why he uttered his name. He didn’t want to deal with this situation especially on the heels of almost being raped. Adam was surprised by Brad’s outburst and pissed since he knew Brad was totally acting. Adam might have been off his game from trauma but he was not stupid enough to believe Brad had been pining for him and wanted to be in a relationship with him. Sure, Brad loved having sex with Adam but Brad loved having sex with other men too. Jealous? Brad only got jealous if it inconvenienced him. No, boyfriend Brad was not in the cards. Kris, however, was proving to be a worse option and not working. Adam felt like he was nearing some sort of epiphany when he was interrupted by Brad’s whining,

“…I can’t believe you were even going to be civil to that guy. Surely he must have noticed his friends were not exactly rainbow flag waving material. Adam, I may not be a gay relationship guru but I am pretty sure it helps when both parties acknowledge they are gay and are willing to act like it’s a good thing. He will never be your boyfriend. Besides, even I am a better boyfriend than he would be.”

“Really? I think I am a better judge of that and actually I find it more offensive when the man I am with is sucking other people’s cocks than simply keeping our relationship secret.”

Brad pouted, “That was just mean. Anyway, he’s not “just” keeping you a secret, he is placing you in serious danger.” Brad bitch slapped him.

Adam became furious at Brad hitting him. He grabbed Brad and threw him on the couch and climbed on top of him trapping his wrists. He knew Brad hated when he overpowered him with his size and strength. Brad was struggling with little success which turned Adam’s anger into amusement. Adam laughed at Brad.

“Get off me, bitch.”

“Say ‘I will never hit Adam again because he is the fiercest, hottest man to grace this earth.””

“Shut the fuck up.” Brad shifted, “Now that you got me here what are you gonna do, big boy?”

Adam smirked, “Tease you.” Since they were both naked for all intents and purposes, Adam kneeled up a little and ran the tip of his cock across Brad’s stomach, “Get you all worked up…” Adam kneeled back down pressing against Brad’s intense erection. “…and then go jerk off in the shower without you.” Adam got up laughing.

“You mother fucking cocktease. Get back here and fuck me.”

Adam went in the bathroom and turned on the shower. He heard the door open and Brad came over and dropped to his knees and looked up with puppy dog eyes, “I’m sorry I hit you.” Adam just looked down and watched as Brad took him in his mouth. Adam’s willpower left him and he wrapped his hands around Brad’s head pushing in deeper. As he came, Adam felt all the tension, fear, emotionalism, and terror of the day release. Brad got up and turned off the water. He pulled a sluggish Adam to the bedroom and into his bed. They heard a knock at the door.

“Now that has to be Cass. Go to sleep baby, you can take care of me in the morning.” Brad kissed him short on the lips.

Adam just fell right to sleep but woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare.   
Struggling to breathe and not scream, Adam pulled Brad closer. Brad wrapped himself tightly around Adam which helped him relax and fall back asleep. Adam woke up to Brad talking on his cell.

“Really? How would you make it up to me? Listen gorgeous, I gotta go Adam just woke up…I’ll tell him.”

Brad hung up his phone and smiled, “That was Joey and he thinks you should make a statement in case these guys get nervous and go after you.”

Adam just nodded not wanting to discuss it, “When did you start talking to Joey again?”

Brad shrugged, “When I ran into him a couple days and fucked him. Hey babe, I gotta go to a photo shoot, if you want me to come over or you want to sleep over tonight let me know. Cass and I are going to the Viper room and you should come.”

Brad kissed Adam short on the lips and left. Adam checked his phone and saw a text from Kris, Call me when u r up.

Adam grabbed a cup of coffee, happy Brad had made a pot before leaving. Little things like that made Adam miss living with Brad. Of course, there were another 200 reasons for not living with Brad. Adam’s cell rang and it was Kris.

Adam sighed, “Kris, I really am not ready to talk about this.”

“I understand you are very upset but we need to deal with this. From what Jake told me, it sounded very serious and you might want to press charges. My drummer, Scott, called me and told me they were really drunk and Johnny was just trying to scare you. He wants to apologize to you.”

Adam felt pissed, “I am not sure what he could possibly say to make things right and I really don’t want to see any of them again.”

“Why didn’t you tell me what happened that night?”

“I was freaked out and I didn’t know how you would react. I was afraid you would blame me. No offense but when things happen to me around you they seem to go from bad to worse and I usually end up taking the fall.”

“I know. I am so sorry. I think it would be better for you if you stayed with Brad. He seems to love you and he treats you more like you deserve. I am not good for you and you rate so much more.”

Adam felt hurt because he knew Kris was saying this because the hiking trip proved their worlds were too different. It probably also reinforced all Kris’ fears of coming out and he didn’t think Adam was worth it. Adam decided to let him go gracefully.

“You are right. Brad and I have a long history together and I think we always knew we would end up back together. Maybe this was the push we needed,” Adam lied convincingly.

“Maybe we can stay friends.”

“Well, I am sure we will run into each other professionally but I really would rather not actively pursue a friendship, Brad gets jealous.” The lies seemed to be rolling off Adam’s tongue and was thankful all the expensive acting lessons were paying off.

After a brief pause, Kris responded, “Yeah, ok. I won’t call you anymore. What do you want to do about the attack? I am supposed to be going on a six-month tour in two weeks and I need to know if my drummer is getting arrested.”

What a dick! This call was about finding out if he could honor his tour dates. Piece of shit! Adam took a deep breath, “Relax, this faggot won’t make waves in your tour schedule. I suggest if you get drunk with your band, you keep your delusions of homosexuality to yourself. Goodbye, Kris.”

“Whoa-where is this coming from?”

“Go fuck yourself.” Adam hung up his cell and diverted his calls to his voicemail. Adam decided to focus his energy on his music and career. As far as he was concerned he was going to be celibate. Hopefully, his usual hyperactive sex drive would calm down enough to let him. Adam was well aware sexual self discipline was not his strong point but he was going to try. At the moment, Kris Allen was making it easy.


	20. Chapter 20

Reversal. Kris was upset about Adam not wanting to get involved with him but understood. Kris spoke to Jake and voiced his concerns about Adam pressing charges or not pressing charges.

“Aside from the label freaking out, I don’t think he wants to be seen as a victim but what if Johnny goes after him.”

“Mr. Allen, I think they should be punished but I understand Adam not wanting to go public. I wouldn’t worry about Johnny, I’ll have a chat with him to ensure he is done gay bashing people. What are you going to do about your drummer?”

“I am going to fire him. The label is going to be pissed but I think we have enough time to get someone to fill in for the tours.”

The label did freak when Kris kicked Scott out of the band and tried to get him to relent. Kris didn’t care because he was too angry that Scott had hurt Adam and probably cost him their relationship. The rest of his band didn’t say anything but there was definitely tension. Kris warned Scott if he made any disparaging remarks to the media, he would go to the police and report a hate crime. Scott promised to just say he left the band for personal reasons. The media picked up the story but it didn’t even make the major publications. Kris found another drummer and set out on tour.

He started drinking a lot on tour and even going back to the hotel with a few female groupies. Kris considered taking home a guy but could not find any he wanted to be with. If he wasn’t gay, why did he want Adam? He was confused, depressed and felt empty. Jason, Jake and Jade had voiced concerns about Kris’ drinking and sleeping around but he just brushed it off or would stop for a night or two.

Two months into the tour, Adam’s first single dropped and was an overnight success. The media loved him and even though he was openly gay, women loved him. The media compared Adam to Elvis and the internet was buzzing with pictures and videos from his past. Kris constantly googled Adam Lambert and almost laughed at himself for being such a fan. A couple interviewers asked Kris what he thought about his former stalker having a bigger hit then him.

“I’ve gotten to know Adam and he is a great guy with an amazing voice. I think his single is awesome and I wish him success. I think his album is going to be huge.”

“Sorry you’re not gay?”

Kris just ignored the question out of panic and his publicist Jason ended the interview. A month later, Adam’s album was released and outsold Kris’ album in the first month. Jason approached Kris reticently,

“Kris the label called and they want to spark some media interest and inject some fresh blood into the tour. They also want to give a certain someone arena experience. They want to replace your opening band with Adam Lambert.”

“Our musical styles are totally different besides doesn’t he have to promote his album?”

“Yeah, he will be busy doing other media events but he needs stage time. Different musical styles means different fan bases and may win you more alternative fans. Are you OK with it? I know something unpleasant went down with you two.”

“I’m fine with it.” Kris had mixed feeling. He wanted to see Adam again because he missed him and still liked him. He did not want to see Adam because it would hurt especially if Brad tagged along. Kris’ feelings toward Adam had grown from his crush. Adam was so open with the media he felt like he had gotten to know him even better over the last few months even though they had no contact. Kris also had fantasized about Adam and had jerked off to more scenes of them together then Kris cared to count. How much had Adam changed? Had all the adoration gone to his head? Was he still in love with Brad? Now that he was becoming a bigger star than Kris, would he even give him a second glance? He saw a few pictures with him and Brad and wondered how they were getting on. They certainly looked very happy together. Even though Adam told the media he was single, Kris assumed it was just a ploy to gain more fans just like when he said he was bi-curious.

A few weeks later Jason confirmed Adam would meet up with them in Texas for the west coast and Canadian shows. Kris just nodded.

Jason continued, “I saw Adam on Kimmel’s show last night. Who is his publicist? He is so open. Jimmy mentioned Adam coming on tour with you and asked if that was part of his stalking plan. Adam responded saying he was a crappy stalker and appreciated the label’s help. He also said he would be trying a lot harder if you weren’t straight.”

Kris looked surprised, “He has a boyfriend. He just likes controversy.”

“He is brilliant with the media and has crazy fans. Your album is not doing as well as your previous ones. You need to start playing the game.”

“Play the game? You want me to pretend I am fucking Adam Lambert?”

“No, but you could keep them guessing a bit. Anyway, you have an interview at the radio station at eight.”

Kris went to bed early and went to his interview. Ignoring Jason’s advice he just said Adam would be coming on the tour because it would make the shows interesting and he was a good musician. The days dragged on until they arrived in Texas. Kris did a full day of interviews and arrived back at the hotel in the early evening. He saw Brad and Adam walk into the lobby. They seemed to be laughing and Brad was heading toward the reception desk while Adam sat down in the lobby. Adam looked over at Kris and stared for a moment before standing up and coming over.

“Hi Kris, thanks for letting me open for you.”

Kris felt the butterflies in his stomach and almost laughed at himself for reacting like he was meeting his idol, “Congratulations on your album going platinum in less than two months. How have you been?”

“Great but it has been surreal. How do you handle the insanity? I thought it was bad when they thought I was a disgusting perv but its almost worse now that they like me.” Adam laughed infectiously.

Before Kris could filter himself he laughed, “You look great, Adam. Is Brad coming on the tour with you?”

“No, he has family in Texas and wanted to see my first show.” Adam smiled at Kris, “You look tired.”

“We came here on the tour bus.”

Adam laughed, “Hey I saw your tour bus and its badass. I heard you had some kind of aquamassager in there. I think we are in a touring van.”

Kris eyed him hungrily, “It is not half as good as a masseur but maybe you can bribe someone to let you use it.”

Adam moved closer, “Maybe I can persuade the head guy.”

“Baby, I am hungry and you promised me a big juicy steak.” Brad put his arms around Adam and smirked at Kris, “Hello douche bag, what’s on the agenda? Sabotaging the stage so some lights fall on him?”

Kris took a deep breath, “Hello Brad. I’ll see you around, Adam.” Kris walked away and heard Brad mumble, “Not if I can help it.”

There was no denying his visceral reaction to Adam. He was still extremely attracted to him and genuinely like him. He also hated Brad. He hated his personality and hated the fact that he was with Adam even more. Kris had tried to take the high road and give Adam up but now Brad had pushed him too far. Game on.

+++

It was crazy and Adam could never have envisioned the fame and success he was experiencing. In less than two months he had become an a-lister and enjoyed the number one spot on most charts for three weeks running. Brad volunteered to help Adam get his life in order to accommodate his overnight success. Adam was a little wary having Brad act as a personal assistant but Brad had made a good argument.

“Babe, I am the perfect person for this job because I know you well better than anyone else and nobody is bitchier than me. I can handle the paps and I can make sure you are treated like a Diva. Besides, I need a job and you need a Personal Assistant or PA.”

Adam had a bad feeling but agreed after Brad pointed out that he could start immediately. Adam met with Rick who suggested he get additional staff besides Brad to include a publicist, a stylist, a bodyguard and a lawyer on retainer not to mention a band. Rick mentioned that 19E had publicists and Adam could chose to have assigned to him. He recommended Adam interview a couple before his band auditions. Brad set up the interviews and was actually doing a decent job maintaining a schedule for Adam. Brad was extremely smart and detailed oriented. Unfortunately, his ADD and self centered nature usually trumped those qualities. Adam was sure two weeks into the job he would slack off and hopefully just quit with no hard feelings between them.

The first interviewee was an aggressive woman named Patti and had fifteen years of experience working for 19E and dealing with celebrities. In person, she was very condescending and criticized Adam’s openness about his orientation. The second interviewee was a former newscaster from the weather channel, had done public relations for several nonprofit groups before being hired by 19E six months earlier. The second interviewee turned out to be a gorgeous, chiseled thirty-something man. He was not necessarily Adam’s type, but his dark blonde hair, hazel eyes and 5’11” statue was undeniably attractive.

Brad looked at Adam, “Hire him.”

The guy smiled with bright white teeth, “Nick Sans, thank you for meeting with me.”

Brad was openly gawking but Adam was committed to staying professional,

“So Mr. Sans, do you know anything about me?”

“Of course, you are plastered all over the internet. I actually think you are doing a great job getting publicity all on your own.”

“You don’t think I should have kept my orientation secret?”

Nick laughed, “There are numerous pictures of you kissing your PA, dressing like a woman and being flamboyant so I doubt you could have kept it under wraps. Besides, women love gay men especially when they are tall, dark and handsome.”

Brad pouted, “What about me?”

Nick smiled at Brad, “I am sure you have all the boys fighting over you.”

“True. Boys love me and I love boys,” Brad batted his eyelashes.

Adam rolled his eyes, “How many celebrities have you worked with?”

“I have been assisting other publicists for the last six months so technically you would be my first.”

Brad smiled, “Perfect, he’s not jaded. Hire him, Adam. The other one was a bitch and harsh on the eyes.”

“Brad, your job is to get me coffee and make sure I make my appointments. I really don’t need your input on selecting staff.”

“Obviously you do if you are even contemplating hiring that homophobic bitch. Besides, lately you have had pretty shit taste in men. I think you should sit back and look pretty while I help choose the dream team that takes you to stardom. Trust me, babe, I am a far better judge of character than you.”

Adam just gave Brad the finger but ended up hiring Nick like Brad suggested. Nick came over the next day wearing a short sleeve shirt and jeans. He was extremely cut and looked like he had about a half an ounce of fat. The guy should have stayed in front of the camera. Adam was glad Brad was hungover and joining them later. Adam felt compelled to warn Nick,

“I hope Brad doesn’t offend you he can get obnoxious and flirts aggressively.”

“It is fine. I get his type and find it amusing.”

“You aren’t interested in him, are you?” Adam wasn’t jealous but he didn’t want drama.

“I am interested in doing a good job and not mixing business with pleasure. Even if I were interested, I certainly would not try and date your ex.”

Adam was relieved that Nick was not planning on bedding Brad. Adam wondered if Nick was straight. He was thinking about it when his thoughts were interrupted by hearing Kris Allen’s name.

“I’m sorry what?”

“Rick and I discussed you getting some time performing with your new band. He spoke to Kris Allen’s people and they agreed to have you open for him for the West coast and Canadian shows.”

“The label agreed to it?”

“They suggested it. Kris needs some publicity and you need exposure. Besides, now that the public loves you and Kris Allen is divorced, I think people are more open to you two becoming an item. You are making gay look sexy.”

Adam laughed, “Really? A few months ago I was a pervert.”

“Well, now you are a sex god with a hit record. What can I say, the public is fickle. Can you tour with the guy?”

“Yeah, but aren’t his people worried about his image?”

“His album is underselling and they need any publicity they can get. Kris is a good musician but not all that interesting to the public. A possible illicit affair with a hot gay guy would certainly spice him up a bit.”

Adam laughed at the irony of it all. They made plans to join the tour in Texas. Brad pitched a fit because he could not go out of town for two months to tour because Glitterfest was coming back for a few shows. Brad begged Adam not to hire a replacement fearing it would be permanent. Nick said he could handle both duties,

“No worries, Brad you are not that good of a personal assistant so I could take on the few things you do. Let’s see, I have to remember to annoy Adam, take advantage of perks, and cock-block Kris Allen. Did I get it all?”

Adam laughed at Nick’s summation of Brad’s duties. Brad gave Adam a dirty look,

“Don’t forget to include blowing the boss when he gets horny and too lazy to pick anyone else up.”

Adam pushed Brad, “I’ll be on tour so it won’t be too hard picking up.”

“As long as you stay away from Kris Allen and use a condom I am happy.”

They flew out to Texas and arrived to chaos. Brad had thought the label would arrange for the car and hotel. Adam was aggravated because they were originally going to leave a day earlier with Nick and the band but Brad had insisted they delay for a to attend a party. Brad was hung over and bitchy,

“I just assumed the label could track their superstar and send a car. I’ll get us a cab.”

Adam just stood there as fans swarmed him. Adam spent twenty minutes posing for pictures and signing autographs before Brad got them a cab. They got to the hotel and were informed that their rooms had been given away and the hotel was booked.

Brad turned to Adam, “I guess I am not the best PA around.”

“You guess? I think its pretty much fact, babe. Why don’t you use your flirtation skills to get us a room so I can get settled and go eat.”

Adam took a seat in the lobby and noticed Kris Allen. His heart skipped a beat and realized he still had feelings. Adam had been so busy he actually had been able to forget about Kris Allen. Fuck, he is still hot and desirable. Adam gained control of his emotions and approached Kris politely,

“Hi Kris, thanks for letting me open for you.”

Adam could tell Kris was affected by him too as Kris looked away while congratulating Adam on his success. Don’t flirt, don’t flirt this is a bad idea. Staying away from Kris was going to be hard. Maybe a cock-blocking, Brad would have been useful.

Adam liked hearing Kris laugh so he continued to joke, “Hey I saw your tour bus and its badass. I heard you had some kind of aquamassager in there. I think we are in a touring van.”

Kris giggled, “Maybe you can bribe someone to let you use it.”

Adam moved closer, “Maybe I can persuade the head guy.” Bad Adam. Luckily Brad was still around.

“Baby, I am hungry and you promised me a big juicy steak.” Adam felt Brad’s arms go around him as Brad insultingly greeted Kris, “Hello douche bag, what’s on the agenda? Sabotaging the stage so some lights fall on him?”

“Hello Brad. I’ll see you around, Adam.” Kris walked away and Brad mumbled, “Not if I can help it.”

After Kris was out of sight, Brad turned to Adam,

“Are you a fucking closet masochist? What does that douche bag have to do to get off your sexy list? I wanted Nick for myself but I really hope you decide to fuck around with him if it means you stay away from Kris Allen. Adam, he will fuck you up. Smarten up, babe, smarten up.”

“I know. I was just messing around.”

“Anyway, the good news is I got you a bed, the bad news is we are staying in Nick’s room. This place is totally booked. Anyway, let’s just get settled and go get some rib-eye.”

Adam was too distracted about Kris to be annoyed at the fact that he was stuck sharing a room with his publicist and PA. He could always make his band double up but that would be too much of a Diva move since his PA screwed up.

They went up to Nick’s room and walked in. Nick was in a towel choosing an outfit. Both Adam and Brad just stared lustfully. He was almost too perfect and Adam wondered if Rick hadn’t just hired a model to pretend to be a publicist.

Nick looked at them, “Is there any reason you have barged into my room and are now just staring at me? If this is some kind of sex thing because I am really not interested.”

Brad spoke first, “Walking around naked should totally be added to your job description.”

Adam pushed Brad, “Sorry, Nick. Brad forgot to book us a room and they are full. I thought you had agreed to share yours.”

Nick looked at Brad, “Wow the bar keeps getting lower and lower.”

“Shut up, you glorified Ken doll. Why didn’t you check on Adam’s room when you check in?”

Nick shrugged, “Who knew your level of incompetence? It never occurred to me that a PA would forget to make a simple reservation. Anyway, you can stay here but there are only two beds and I am not sharing.”

Brad rolled his eyes, “You fuck women don’t you? Because no gay guy would pass up both me and Adam.”

“I think someone who wanted to keep their job would, be them gay or straight. What are you heterophobic? What do you care who I fuck since it will never be you.”

Adam laughed, “Remind me to give you a raise, Nick. Come on, Brad, let’s go get some grub.”

Brad pouted and then followed Adam out to the hotel restaurant. After their meal they had some beers and went back to the room. Nick was already asleep. Adam tried to get Brad to sleep on the floor but settled for Brad’s promise not to molest him in the night. The next day Adam did some interviews and then headed to the arena for sound check. Once inside, he was a little intimidated by the size and number of seats. Kris came over and guessed his thoughts,

“It will seem smaller when it’s full. You are going do great.”

“I hope so but it could be a hostile crowd. Most of your fans still think I molested you against your wishes and that you hate me.”

“Well, then they would be seriously disillusioned if they knew the truth.”

Adam heard the suggestive tone and became annoyed, “Well, lucky for you that you never bothered to set the story straight. Have a good show.” Adam walked away. He was proud of himself for not flirting back. He just hoped he could stay away. With Brad gone, he would have to rely on either himself or Nick to keep them apart. Hopefully, Nick was up to the task.


	21. Chapter 21

Persistence. Kris felt rebuked by Adam’s abrupt departure but figured he was just nervous about his first show. Kris saw Brad wandering around backstage and deftly avoided him. A few weeks earlier, Jason told him he had heard Adam hired his boyfriend as a PA. Jade, Kris’ own PA, had tried to sort out logistical details with Brad but found him totally clueless on his duties. Kris’ wasn’t surprised by that revelation. Kris was drinking in his dressing room where he usually hid out before hitting the stage. He usually only had one or two beers before performing and saved the heavy stuff for after his set. Kris wanted to watch Adam’s set so he exited his dressing room and stood in the wings. .

Adam hit the stage, sexy and confident, as if it were his tour. He had a swagger that dared the audience to question is hotness. The crowd was going wild and Adam played off the sexual energy. Kris felt himself getting hard as he watched Adam touch himself during one of his songs. Brad came over during Adam’s last song which caused Kris to tense.

“Leave him alone on this tour. I may not be coming on the road but I plan on popping in and taking care of him which means cock-blocking you, douche bag.”

“Brad, are you an Adam in a committed relationship?”

Brad seemed surprised by the question, “We fuck often enough and Adam loves me.”

“That is not a yes so fuck off. I suggest you leave me alone or else I am going to request you not be allowed on tour at all. Since I am the headlining act, I am sure they promoters will back me. See Brad, I can be a dick, as well as, a douche bag.” Kris felt good telling Brad off.

Kris was also happy that Brad had basically admitted that he and Adam were not monogamous. Kris headed back towards is dressing room and bumped into Adam coming from off stage. Kris could tell his adrenaline was still pumping and he was sweaty from exertion. Kris immediately reacted and without thinking pulled him into his private dressing room. Adam seemed surprised and confused. Since Kris had downed three beers which is two more than is usual one before a show, his inhibitions were down. Kris immediately kissed Adam. Adam pulled back and looked at Kris,

“What the-”

Kris didn’t let him finish before attacking his mouth again. Adam seemed to hesitate for half a second and then responded by pushing Kris against the wall and returning the passionate kiss. Kris had not been this heated since his last time with Adam. None of his random encounters on tour had been half as erotic as this one. Kris was barely aware he had to be on stage in a half hour or that people were probably looking for Adam. Kris struggled to open Adam’s complicated, tight fitting pants. Impatiently Adam pushed Kris hands away and deftly opened his pants and released himself. Kris dropped to his knees and immediately took Adam into his mouth. The action surprised not only Adam but Kris himself. This was definitely not the actions of a straight man. Kris tried not to gag and held Adam’s hips from not going to deep.

“Oh God, Kris, I am not going to last. Fucking incredible.” Adam came suddenly in Kris’ mouth with a loud moan. Kris was not expecting Adam’s sudden ejaculation and gagged at the feel of his semen hitting the back of his throat. Kris pulled back and spit out Adam’s cum while gagging. Kris was mortified by his actions and worried Adam would be hurt ro think badly of him.

“I guess it was better for me.” Kris looked up and saw the amusement in Adam’s eyes.

“Sorry, I guess I have some areas to improve on,” Kris said humbly.

“Any more improvement and I will have no self control. Come up here.” Kris stood up and Adam kissed him gently yet deeply. “I swore I wasn’t going to mess around with you.”

“I am glad you have no will power.” Kris looked at his watch, “Shit, I have to go on. By the way, that was the sexiest performance I have ever seen. You are great on stage.”

Kris quickly checked his appearance and ran out of the dressing room leaving a confused, satiated Adam in his wake.

+++

What the fuck just happened? Adam looked around Kris’ dressing room and the only proof he had that he had just gotten a blow job from Kris Allen was the fact that he was standing with his pants around his ankles with a limp cock. Adam pulled up his pants and checked his appearance before walking out of the dressing room. He went by his band and congratulated them on a great performance. Brad came over annoyed,

“Where have you been? You have that ‘I just came’ smirk on your face. Did you let a groupie blow you?”

Adam was always amazed by Brad’s ability to recognize when some one had sex. Too bad he didn’t have a more useful sixth sense. Adam saw no use to denying it,

“Sort of, now let’s celebrate my first arena show.”

“It wasn’t Nick was it?”

“Let it go, Brad.”

Adam moved away from him and drank champagne with his band. He could hear Kris performing and decided to catch the last two songs. Jake came over,

“Hi Adam, nice to see you again. You put on an…interesting show,” Jake smiled.

Adam laughed, “That is what I was going for…interesting. I’m good, man. It is nice to see you too. How is Kris treating you?”

“Better than he is treating himself. Listen, I wanted to say I was sorry if I freaked you out that night but I had to catch Johnny off balance.”

“Apologize? You saved my life, perhaps literally. I’ll definitely think twice before hiking with strangers. It’s cool I have dealt with hate before. Unfortunately, it comes with the territory. I need to get a body guard. Do you have any gay friendly recommendations?”

“Actually, a former colleague of mine is looking for work. You would like him, he is in his early forties and good looking. I was told you are only hiring beautiful men.”

Adam laughed, “Who said that?”

“Jason. He said your publicist was like an underwear model or something.”

“He is full of shit. He was a weather reporter, thank you very much. But, if your friend is cool, I’d like to hire him after the tour.”

Adam hoped to get information from Jake, “So is Kris seeing anyone special?”

“Why don’t you ask him?”

“I was hoping to find our behind his back so I don’t look like a loser if he is.” Adam smiled.

Jake laughed, “It is a busy tour with little time left for relationships. Unless of course, they were on the tour… See you around, Adam.” Jake walked away.

Kris came off the stage and everyone was immediately shuttled to a post concert party at a club. It was part of a local radio station promotion. Adam and his band had their own limo. Brad and Nick came along and were bickering about something on the ride to the club. They arrived and were led to a VIP lounge with lots of free booze. Kris’ band seemed to tolerate Adam’s band but definitely didn’t like Brad too much and was cold to Adam. Brad and Nick got a table with Jason and Jake. Kris sat with his own band so Adam went by Brad and Nick. They ordered shots and were joined by a few beautiful women making the other groups jealous. Brad pulled Adam on the dance floor and started grinding against him to the music. Adam glanced over by Kris and noticed he was looking at them and seemed pissed off. The song ended and Adam guided Brad back to their table. Brad went by Nick and sat on his lap.

“I am assuming you are drunk and disoriented. Now get off my lap.”

“You are such a prude,” Brad got up reluctantly and sat down next to Adam, “Looks like a threesome ain’t happening anytime soon. So, Jason, what exactly does a publicist do? I think Nick is curious.”

Nick laughed, “That was actually funny, Brad.”

Adam saw Kris looking over and had a feeling Brad’s presence was keeping him away. Adam asked Brad to get him a drink.

“Sorry, I am off the clock, babe. I think they have cocktail waitresses anyway.”

“Well, how about you find one. When did you go off the clock?”

“I guess when I did those tequila shots with you. You can still order me around but if it isn’t sexual, I am probably not going to follow.”

Adam was aggravated but perked up when Kris came over and sat down next to Jake and Nick. Adam watched as Nick and Kris chatted away. Adam found himself getting jealous that Nick had perfect skin, a perfect body, and a great tan. Adam overheard them talking about being in Africa. Nick explained he did PR work for some charity organizations combating AIDS. Kris was impressed and asked why he quit.

“I couldn’t afford to be so idealistic. Hopefully, Adam will be ultra successful, make me rich and I can go back to more meaningful work.”

“Helping someone fulfill a life long dream is meaningful too,” Kris offered.

Nick smiled at him, “Very true and it has its perks.”

Adam noticed Kris looking at him again and so did Brad. Brad spoke to Adam in a lower than usual voice but not quite low enough,

“Why is that douche bag looking over? I think he is bipolar. Come here, go away, I want you, I am not gay, help I am being molested. The boy is very confused. Adam you are going to be such a bigger star than him, move on, babe. If you want a challenge, flirt with Nick, he has problems responding appropriately too.”

Nick looked over smiling at Brad, “I respond appropriately. You flirt, I am not interested so I ignore it. How is that inappropriate?”

“It is wrong on so many levels. Firstly, you always flirt back whether you are interested or not. Second, how can you not be interested? I am hot and a great fuck. Ask Adam?”

“The fact that I can ask my boss how good you are is enough of a reason for me refrain. Why don’t you have a few more shots and just pass out.”

“I would but I don’t trust you to cock-block Kris Allen,” Brad explained while staring at Kris.

Adam hoping to cut the tension and get Brad to back off, flagged the cocktail waitress and ordered more shots. Kris looked at Brad,

“So, Brad, when do you go back to LA?”

“Not until you all head to New Mexico.”

“Whatever will Adam do with out you?” Kris smiled innocently. Brad was annoyed,

“I don’t know but I’ll still be reachable in case he needs to call me for bail money or support when you fuck him over again.”

“Well, I wouldn’t sit by the phone too long.”

Adam was surprised by Kris’ snarky attitude but he didn’t want to see the two fist fight again. He looked over at Nick hoping that he could distract Brad so Adam could focus on Kris. Nick winked at Adam and turned to Brad, “Brad, I am going to give you a one time opportunity to dance with me so don’t fuck it up.”

Brad went with Nick to the dance floor and started dancing. Adam watched for a few seconds and laughed at Brad’s attempts to seduce Nick. Adam had a feeling Nick wasn’t gay which made it even funnier. Adam turned towards Kris,

“You were good tonight.”

“Were you referring to the concert or our encounter?”

Adam was caught off guard by the directness, “Both I guess, the latter being a lot more startling.” The cocktail waitress brought a bunch of shots. Adam was further surprised that Kris was doing shots with him. Adam knew he had to slow down but a buzzed Kris was a flirty Kris and a buzzed Adam was an interested Adam. Brad came back over and sat down between Adam and Kris.

“That fucker started dancing with some chicks and pretending he was into one of them. A little extreme just to blow me off, don’t you think?”

Adam laughed, “I think maybe he likes chicks. Brad not everyone is gay. Have a shot and cut your losses.”

“Yeah, I guess. At least I still got you as a fall back.” Brad ran his tongue around Adam’s ear. Adam pulled back and glanced at Kris nervously. Unfortunately Brad noticed,

“What’s wrong Adam? Am I ruining your chances of fucking Allen here? You want me to pretend we don’t fool around so you can ruin your life dating this walking disaster? Maybe he likes it that you fuck me, takes the pressure off him from putting out.”

Adam realized Brad had effectively cock blocked him with his words and he would not be spending the night with Kris Allen. Adam sat back and drank. Kris was still watching Adam. Brad seemed oblivious to Adam’s withdrawal. Brad was busy watching Nick.

“What the fuck is he doing?”

Adam looked over and saw Nick sensually grinding against a girl while kissing her neck. Although not usually a fan of hetero sex, Adam thought it looked hot. He heard Kris respond to Brad,

“Looks like he is having a good time and kissing a beautiful girl.”

“That is so cruel. All the good looking boys are supposed to be gay. Didn’t he get the memo? Maybe you should fire him, Adam, and hire a gay publicist. It is like you are surrounded by sexually ambiguous people.” Brad looked pointedly at Kris.

Adam frowned at Brad, “I am not going to fire someone for their sexual orientation. That would be a little hypocritical.”

Brad pouted until a cute guy came over and asked him to dance. Brad went to the dance floor happy and redeemed.

“What is the deal with you and Brad? Are you dating?”

Adam didn’t want to lie, “No, he is my ex-boyfriend turned best friend. Sometimes we cross the line but in the morning the reasons we broke up are usually glaring. Brad’s a free spirit and I am a romantic, not always the most compatible mix.”

“I am a romantic too.”

“Really? I don’t find the closet that romantic.” Adam regretted his words when he saw Kris’ teasing smile disappear and his expression grew somber. Kris just looked down and withdrew into himself.

Adam felt his stomach turn knowing he had hurt him. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that to come out so harsh.”

“I am not sure sugar coating it would have helped. I know you think I am weak and cowardly but Adam aside from you I don’t like men. I am not saying I am 100% straight but I am sure I am not 100% gay. I don’t think coming out would be any more honest. I have never really struggled with my sexuality before so I don’t know how to handle it.”

“Then don’t, stop coming on to me and stay straight.” Adam knew he was being immature but couldn’t help it. He wanted Kris and wanted Kris to want him.

“Is that what you want?”

Adam wanted him. He wanted to ravage him on the spot and chain him to his bed indefinitely. He settled for a more conservative response,

“No, but I don’t want to keep getting hurt by your indecisiveness.”

Kris leaned over and kissed Adam on the lips. Adam pulled back after a second trying to show restraint while fighting his growing erection. “This is how I got into trouble before. Both you and I drunk maybe we should exercise bad judgment in private. You want to leave?”

Adam was drunk enough not to care about risking heartbreak. Adam watched as Kris hesitated and then became annoyed. Always a cock tease. Fuck it, I am not drunk enough because I am still thinking. Adam downed his drink and slammed the glass on the table making Kris wince. Adam signaled the waitress for another. Kris looked at Adam and started to speak,

“Adam-“

“Forget it. You just like to mind fuck men, I get it. It was a bad idea anyway so I will probably thank you tomorrow. Excuse me, I am going to go dance.”

Adam went on the dance floor and decided Nick and his dancing harem was the hottest thing there. He went over and started dancing with them. The women recognized him and gladly welcomed them into their group. Adam enjoyed female attention even though he had no intention of following through. He was a good sport and let them cop their feels. Adam knew he was way too drunk to be out and hoped he didn’t humiliate himself too bad. Adam vaguely remembered grinding against Nick, arguing with Brad and dancing on a table. He woke up in a dark room with a massive headache. Adam moved and felt a naked body next to him and froze realizing he too was naked. Adam started going through the list of possibilities and realized none of them boded well. He really hoped he didn’t ruin his life by fucking someone he shouldn’t.


	22. Chapter 22

Revelations. Kris watched regretfully as Adam left him to go dance with his hot publicist and a bunch of girls. He continued to observe Adam as he flirted with the women and danced without any inhibitions. Kris sat down by Jake and Jason feeling like he blew it. Jason looked over by Kris,

“Is Adam bisexual?”

“No, I think he just likes to fuck with people. I think his publicist is straight.”

Jason laughed, “Not too straight from what I hear. Rumor has it that Adam hires staff based on their fuckability.”

Jake looked up, “Not that it means anything but Nick is divorced.” Both Kris and Jason turned to Jake in surprise. Jake shrugged and continued,

“I checked him out when I found out he was coming on the tour. Anyway, he had a promising career as a journalist but then a bunch of amateur porn both hetero and homo he did in his late teens came out. His career was done. He got stuck doing weather and writing articles for some obscure papers. Eventually, he got into public relations work and did well.”

Kris eyes bulged, “He was a pornstar? Does Adam know?”

Jason cringed, “I doubt 19E knows. That could be a nasty scandal for Adam.” Jason turned to Kris, “You might want to give him a heads up.”

Kris agreed and then decided to press Jake and see if he could get some dirt on Brad.

“Did you check out his PA?”

Jake nodded, “He wasn’t a pornstar but made some silly you tubes. He actually is pretty clean and seems to be a bit of a free spirit. His family owns a huge ranch in Texas and are quite well off. They seem to indulge him with a generous monthly allowance.”

Once again Kris reflected on what an asset Jake was to have on his staff. He definitely would have to give him a great Christmas bonus if not a raise. Kris continued to nurse his drink and chat with people. Kris looked around and spotted a commotion on the other side of the club. Kris went over and paled when he saw Adam dancing on a table. Kris was frozen as he watched Adam touch himself and gyrate his hips to the music. The man was far too sexy for his own good. Adam began slowly undressing. He took down his pants and was about to remove his boxer briefs when Nick pulled him down.

Cale, Kris’ guitarist, shook his head and stated, “That is going to go viral on the net. I cannot believe his band, PA and publicist let it go that far. Have they no sense?”

“I think they are all pretty drunk.”

“Obviously, if they are letting their superstar exotically dance at a media intensive event. I thought he was gay,” Cale nodded over to where Adam was.

Kris looked over and saw Adam making out with a woman. The same woman Nick was dancing with earlier. Kris felt himself getting furious and needed to leave before he made a scene. He found Jake and took off. They went back to the hotel and Kris went to bed. He woke up the next day slightly hung over.

He plugged in his laptop and googled Adam Lambert News and got over 8,000 hits. Sure enough there were videos of his strip show and him making out with a girl. Most of the articles painted him out as a wild child having a good time on a boring tour. Another article mentioned that he and Kris had looked friendly early on in the evening but it was obvious that they were polar opposites.

Kris continued to scan the articles and saw a picture of Adam, Nick and the girl Adam had kissed leaving together. TMZ claimed it looked like Glambert shared his lovers with women as long as he can join in. Kris showered and found Jade, Jason and Jake for their daily meeting.

“Is the label freaking out about Adam?”

“No. I spoke to Rick and he thought the publicity was great. Now everyone knows he is on the tour and media will be following you all around.”

“Really. I thought the label was more conservative than that.”

“They are conservative with you because you are successful based on a wholesome image. Adam is successful because he is sexy, sleazy and wild. This kind of publicity just makes it more Adam. Unfortunately, he gets to be a badass rockstar and you are stuck being a role model.”

“You mean a prude.”

“Kris, you are who you are. True I think you are a little wilder than your image but would you really want to be dancing on tables, fucking your staff and going home with strangers? You hate the media and would crumble with the attention Adam gets. You two are like apples and oranges.”

Kris knew if the roles had been reversed and the media had caught him drunk and out of control, he would be mortified. He wondered how Adam was reacting and if he had slept with Nick. Kris’ train of thought was broken by Jason saying that he and Adam were scheduled to do a joint interview in two hours.

“Try and focus on the music and the opportunity to reach a wider audience and support a new artist. Do not let them goad you into judging Adam or reacting to his latest shenanigan.”

Kris went to the interview which was being conducted in the hotel. It was an interviewer from Rolling Stone magazine. As Kris entered the room, he noticed Adam and Nick already sitting on the couch. Adam looked good but tired. Nick also looked a little worn and Kris felt himself glaring at him because he was so damn good looking. Kris was confidant he could compete with Brad but Nick was out of his league and probably great in bed. Nick just smiled innocently at Kris as he stood up and greeted him and Jason.

The interviewer went right for the jugular with Adam,

“So the internet was buzzing with videos of you stripping and fooling around with girls.”

Adam laughed, “I’ve seen a few and what can I say except no good ever comes from tequila.”

“Are you bisexual?”

“No, I kiss girls and become curious after a few drinks but I am definitely gay. I like men and I date men.”

Kris was envious about Adam’s confidence to just be honest and open with the public. The interview continued and Adam claimed he was very excited about being on the tour and thought Kris was an amazing musician.

The reporter asked about the stalking. Kris responded saying most of it was a misunderstanding and blown way out of proportion. Adam added,

“I am not a stalker by nature. It was a bum rap but I am a huge fan of Kris and if I were so disposed to stalk…I would pick him.”

Kris’ jaw dropped at Adam’s statement but then looked at Adam and laughed, “That is almost creepy.”

“Mmm. I have been accused of being creepy before.”

Kris giggled and the reporter quirked an eyebrow. Jason jumped in and mentioned about their albums and future tour dates. The reporter thanked them and they did some photo ops. As they finished up, Kris decided to talk to Nick. Brad had showed up towards the end and had whisked Adam away.

“Nick, can we go somewhere and chat?”

Nick shrugged, “Sure, Kris. We can get some lunch downstairs.”

They sat down and Kris found he liked Nick. He was down to earth and a good conversationalist.

Kris wondered how much Nick knew about him, “Has Adam told you anything about me and him?”

“A little but its quite obvious that you two are infatuated with each other and are having difficulty hooking up.”

“I am not gay.”

“Well, that certainly impedes the relationship from developing. From a distance it looks like mutual attraction. Are you sure you aren’t bisexual? Listen, I am not gay either but every now and then I fool around with men. Some people fall into the gray area between gay and straight.”

“I never did before.”

Nick shrugged, “Well maybe Adam is the only guy you like. I think you are probably reading too much into it. Just because you like Adam and want to be with him it doesn’t mean you have to adopt a whole gay lifestyle. My guess is you are bisexual which is worse because you think you have a choice. The truth is we can’t always control who we fall in love with and if their gender isn’t a problem sexually why fight it? You can get aroused with Adam, can’t you?”

Kris blushed, “Yeah.”

“Then what is the problem? I think you need to see this through otherwise you will question it the rest of your life. What are you afraid of?”

“I don’t think my fans would accept me in a gay relationship.”

Nick shrugged, “Your fan base might change but most people won’t care. You are a good musician that is known for good songs. If you lose some of your 13 year old fans, you will survive and maybe gain some new ones. Look, I know you don’t want to let your fans down but at some point you need to live your life otherwise you will end up being another pathetic, rich celebrity that whines about having nothing.”

“I heard you used to be a promising journalist.”

“Yeah but I was considered too pretty and made some stupid mistakes that haunted me later.”

Kris could hear the wistful tone to Nick’s voice and decided not to push. After sticking to lighter subjects, they finished lunch. As much as he liked Nick, he felt compelled to tell Adam about the porn since it could hurt his image. Kris felt better talking to Nick since he validated his feelings toward Adam and made his sexual ambiguity seem normal. Kris decided to recommit himself to exploring his feelings for Adam.

+++

Adam ran his hand over the arms of the man next to him, feeling the well developed muscles and zero body-fat. He immediately realized it wasn’t Brad or Kris. The perfect physique had to belong to Nick. Adam never really bedded a hard body before mostly because it made him self conscious and they tended not to go for him. Gym rats usually stuck to their own or went for twinks like Brad. Adam didn’t fit either mold since he hated the gym and his mannerism were too masculine. Bad!Adam sleeping with his publicist. Fuck it, damage done, no sense passing up the opportunity while conscious. Adam started running his hand down Nick’s chest and over his abdomen. He was incredibly turned on by the muscular definition beneath his roaming fingers and the softness of his skin. Adam began to move his hand lower as he pushed his raging hard-on against Nick’s ass.

“Easy now, fella.” Nick grabbed Adam’s hand before he reached the prize. “Where is Nina?”

Adam was dazed and disappointed, “Who?”

“Nina. Remember the girl you wanted to fuck.”

“What! I don’t screw girls.”

“So we learned. Do you not remember anything?”

Adam could not remember much and was quickly beginning to feel stupid, “No, but I assumed we fucked since we are naked in bed together.”

“Well, that is an incorrect assumption. I wouldn’t fuck my client especially one that was hung up on another man. No, you insisted you wanted to fuck a woman and needed help. You don’t remember begging for a threesome? Just as well, since you really didn’t put on a good performance and basically failed to maintain an erection with a woman.”

Adam blushed, “Really? I wanted to fuck a woman? How far did I get?”

“Not too far. Nina gave you a bit of a blowjob to get you going but once you tried to mount her, you lost your erection and passed out. I had to work very hard pleasing Nina enough to keep her mouth shut to the tabloids. I am sure there will be some story about you not living up to the sex god reputation.”

Adam groaned, “That is humiliating.”

“It was pretty sad but in your defense you never claimed to be bisexual.”

“So I didn’t try to go after you?”

“You did offer to blow me but I declined.”

Adam felt a little insulted and hurt, “Wow, that’s harsh.”

Nick looked at him amused, “You have enough people lusting after you to not care about my blow off. For the record, if I didn’t work for you and you weren’t in love with Kris Allen, I probably would have went for it. You are one of the sexiest people I know.”

Adam smiled. Even if Nick was lying it made him feel better. As if the morning couldn’t get worse, Brad came charging in the room and threw a fit seeing them in bed.

“What the fuck? Nick, you fucking slut, don’t you have any professionalism? You are not supposed to be fucking your boss.”

Nick laughed, “You aren’t seriously lecturing me on professionalism, are you?”

“Yes, I am and I think you should be fired. Adam, how could you fuck him? You didn’t even like him and you knew he was my next conquest.”

Adam tried to digest Brad’s inane outburst as Nick spoke, “Reality check, Brad. You were never going to get an opportunity to fuck me, never. Aside from being out of your league, I am not a big fan of your dramatic, flamboyant nature. You are not my type.”

“Whatever. For the record, I am everybody’s type some just live in denial. Anyway, the point is you should not be fucking Adam. I am pretty sure that is grounds for dismissal.”

Adam’s head was throbbing and listening to Brad’s ridiculous shrieking wasn’t helping, “Shut up, Brad. If fucking me was grounds for dismissal, you would have been fired long ago. Nick and I did not do anything anyway. Apparently, I was too busy making an ass out of myself with a girl.”

Brad’s eyes widened. “You-you were with a girl? See Adam, he is a bad influence. What are you going to do next claim to be heterosexual? Your fame is confusing you and you are changing. I don’t even recognize you anymore. Since when do you only fuck straight men? Are you trying to go back into the closet?”

“I was never in the fucking closet! I am not changing; I simply got drunk and stupid, end of story. I really am not in the mood for this Brad. This is exactly why we never lasted. You constantly try to be self righteous and put me down to cover up for your weaknesses.”

Nick got up and walked to the bathroom naked. Brad and Adam just stared lustfully after him. Both commented in unison,

“Damn.”

Brad shrugged, “Alright, I forgive you if you tapped that but you have to share.”

Adam laughed, “He is not mine to share and for the record apparently I didn’t get to tap that and if I did, I don’t have any memory of it.”

“That sucks. All well, you have a joint interview with Kris Allen in two hours. Also, a video of you strip dancing as gone viral. I saw it and it is hot. You can totally tell you are packing. ‘Hung like a horse’ would be the quoted phrase, as well as, ‘sporting massive glambulge,’” Brad smiled.

Nick came out showered and in a towel and Brad laid into him again,

“Your job is to protect Adam how could you get him caught on tape stripping and making out with girls. He should fire you for incompetence.”

Nick was ignoring Brad but Adam thought Brad had a valid point, “Nick, why didn’t you stop me?”

Nick shrugged, “I was buzzed and you were putting on a good show. Besides, I stopped you before you crossed the line and whipped out your cock.”

“The label is going to rip me a new one for this.”

“Adam, the label loves you for this kind of shit. My job is to help you sell records and be a superstar. You are great at publicity so I let you be yourself and step in before you fall over the edge. I think this will boost sales and keeps you interesting. I saw the youtubes and you are gorgeous in them. Do you really want me to reign you in to the point of boredom?”

Adam thought about, “No, I like being edgy.”

Adam went to his interview with Kris and was nervous how Kris would react to Adam’s latest scandal. Since the interviewer was there they did not have an opportunity to interact privately. Adam was tickled when he noticed Kris giving Nick dirty looks. He had wanted to speak with Kris but Brad arrived and wanted Adam to go with him to meet some friends for lunch. Rather than cause a scene, Adam acquiesced.

That night they had another show. Adam hoped Kris would provide him with a repeat performance but knew two blowjobs in as many days was being greedy. Adam prepared for his set while Brad actually acted like a PA and brought him tea and helped with his hair. Kris came into his dressing room about a half hour before he would hit the stage. Brad glared at Kris, “I am not leaving you two alone.”

Kris just ignored Brad, “I need to tell you something about Nick.”

Both Brad and Adam looked at Kris with avid interest.

“He has a bit of a past that might create a scandal for you.”

Brad smiled, “Really, do tell.”

Kris reluctantly continued, “He quit journalism because some porns he did in his younger days surfaced.”

“Porn! He was a fucking porn-star! This just keeps getting better.” Brad exclaimed as he exchanged looks with Adam. Adam was sad that he missed the opportunity to fuck not only a hard body but a fucking porn-star. That would have been awesome.

Adam continued to day dream when Brad pushed him, “Dude, we totally have to see these porns and never let him live it down. Mr. high and mighty was a second rate porn-star. You got copies, Allen?”

Kris shook his head, “I think you are missing the bigger point. Adam, the media will find out you hired a porn star to be your publicist and go wild.”

Adam shrugged, “Who cares they think I am fucking him anyway.”

Brad seemed obviously very pleased by Kris’ news, “Kris, does Nick know that he’s been found out?”

“No.”

“Good, then maybe I can at least get a blowjob out of this. Adam, don’t fuck Kris in my absence. I have to go blackmail Nick into sucking me off.”

Adam rolled his eyes, “Brad, be a decent human being for once.”

“No way, that arrogant slut thinks he is out of my league and this, my darling, is the great leveler I needed. Thanks, Kris, for once you did something right.”

Adam watched Kris cringe and Brad skip away. Kris pushed Adam, “You are going to let Brad blackmail your publicist?”

“I don’t get the impression Nick will cave. Besides, those two have been bickering since they met, let them sort it out. I’d rather stay here and talk to you.”

“What about the scandal?”

“I like Nick and wouldn’t fire him over this. People are more important to me than bad publicity. Look what I endured for you.” Adam laughed, “I gotta go onstage. Are you going to throw me in your dressing room after my performance?”

“If it is as hot as the last one, I just might.”

Adam moved closer to Kris, “In that case, I will be on fire.” Adam bit his neck lightly and left to perform.


	23. Chapter 23

Gullible. Kris immediately regretted sharing Nick’s secret in front of Brad. Kris could understand Brad’s misplaced loyalty to Adam but trying to blackmail Nick for sex was just wrong. Plus, Jake had probably found a very well kept secret and its discovery could be devastated to Nick. Kris felt horrible because once again he had hurt someone because he failed to recognize the repercussions of his actions.   
Kris tried to get Adam to step in but he didn’t seem to think the porn thing was a big deal. In a way, Kris admired how most things just rolled off Adam’s back and how he did not worry about bad publicity. Adam was comfortable with fame in a way Kris never was and seemed to take everything in stride.

Kris watched as Adam hit the stage and begin to seduce the crowd. Even though their music was very different, Kris appreciated his talent and really enjoyed watching him. Kris felt someone next to him and became apprehensive when he noticed it was Brad.

“Still lusting after Adam, I see. Well, luckily he has found a new toy to keep him out of trouble. I actually empathize with you because I can’t compete with Nick either. I knew when I saw them in bed this morning it was just as well I wasn’t going on tour.”

Kris had seen the tabloids but hadn’t believed it. He looked at Brad, “You are full of shit. I doubt Nick would sleep with Adam.”

Brad shrugged, “Maybe it was the result of booze but trust me, bitch, they were naked in Nick’s bed looking extremely intimate. For the record, gay men don’t sleep naked with other men unless they are fucking, you know.”

Kris did not get the sense that Brad was lying and began to wonder about Nick. Maybe Nick was using Adam to get back a career in front of the cameras. After all, it was strange for a publicist to allow Adam to do a strip dance on a table and to get caught kissing the same woman. Kris didn’t want Brad to see his insecurity so he responded neutrally, “So is this your last night on tour?”

“Pretty much. I am going to spend a few days with my family and then go back to LA. I will still check in on Adam and if you hurt him I will be back here to fuck you up in a heart beat.”

Kris laughed, “Somehow you threatening to kick someone’s ass is really funny.” Nick came over looking concerned.

“Are you boys playing nice?”

Brad smiled sweetly, “Oh yeah, Pornstar. Kris here was mentioning all about your former career on the small screen. Must have been very interesting weather reports.”

Kris cringed at Brad’s statements and felt two feet tall when he saw Nick’s face go blank.

Brad continued, “Oh, was that a big secret? I’ll try to keep it to myself but I’m not too good with secrets unless I have some incentive. Let’s say, you being very, very nice to me.”

Nick looked down and then back at Brad, “You’ll keep my secret in return for sex?”

Brad smiled and nodded. Kris was seething with anger but not sure what to do. He felt awful that he had put Nick in this position especially since Nick had been really kind to him.

Nick moved closer to Brad, “I am really good with men and my lovers always leave exhausted and satisfied.” Nick ran his hand down Brad’s back and ass. Kris was getting nauseous while Brad seemed to be getting more turned on.

Nick smiled sensually, “Too bad you will never know. I think I’d rather be exposed than have to endure the boredom and disappointment of fucking you. I will never know why a man like Adam, who seems to have good taste, got involved with a putz like you.”

Brad starting turning red, “You are a real asshole, Nick. Obviously, you must not have been a very good pornstar if you are working as a publicist.”

Nick shrugged, “Brad, I like being a publicist and the label is paying me good money to do it.”

“Too bad you’ll be fired when they find out you did sex films.”

Nick laughed, “What makes you think they don’t know? It was long enough ago that no one cares. For the record, I only did a few amateur films before I got signed for a very lucrative modeling contract. Even if they did fire me, it really wouldn’t matter since I don’t work out of financial need. Like I’ve told you before, I am way, way out of your league.”

Brad was flabbergasted and obviously really pissed. Nick gave Brad a very cold smile, “Since you decided to be such a dick just now, I think when I cover your job, I’ll be sure to show Adam just how incompetent you were and how much better off he is without you as his assistant. Later, Bradley.” Nick walked away and Kris had to bite his tongue from laughing. Brad just shook his head,

“He is really annoying. He probably just fucked Adam to make me mad.” Brad walked away and Kris continued to watch Adam. He wasn’t sure what the deal was between Adam and Nick but he did know he owed Nick an apology. Kris decided to miss Adam’s exit and find Nick. He found Nick backstage talking to Jade. Kris asked to speak to Nick alone.

“I am really sorry about Brad finding out about the pornography. I had to tell Adam in case it became a scandal. I had no idea he would try to blackmail you.”

“No harm, no foul. Brad’s an ass. How did you find out? Was it leaked to the media?”

“No, my bodyguard is ex-CIA so he can find out things about people. He checked you out when you all joined the tour.”

“Good asset to have on your side. Seriously, Kris, don’t give it another thought. The label knows already and that information would only sensationalize Adam more. I’ve had to live with that mistake long enough to get past the fear of people knowing. I just wish is had been higher quality and I was a better actor.” Nick laughed.

“Thanks for not making me feel worse, you really are a nice guy.”

Adam came backstage. Nick smiled, “Excuse me, I have to cater to Adam’s whims and show him what a shitty PA Brad is.” Nick went by Adam and Kris just went by his band. He purposely became involved in a deep conversation with Cale to avoid Adam. Kris noticed Adam glancing over a lot but fought the urge to acknowledge him or return the attention. Kris did not want to hurt Nick after he was just so gracious. If Nick and Adam had hooked up, Kris would let it run its course before pursuing Adam again.

+++

Adam came offstage with his adrenaline pumping from his performance and his body taut with anticipation of being with Kris. He immediately sought Kris out and was disappointed when he saw him with his band. Adam tried to get Kris’ attention to go somewhere private but Kris seemed to intentionally ignore his signals. After a few minutes of perseverance, Adam understood once again Kris was pulling back. You’re hot and you’re cold, you’re up and you’re down…that song should have been written for Kris. Adam sat down by himself to lick his wounds and wallow in self pity. Nick came over with a bottle of water.

“Good show. Here, make sure you rehydrate before you start drinking the hard stuff.”

“Thanks, where’s Brad?”

“Probably making a martini or making someone miserable.”

Adam smiled, “Brad can really be a good guy. He just isn’t used to not being adored. Most men find him irresistible so he is acting weird because he is confused by your brush-offs.”

“If you say so. I think trying to blackmail me for sex crosses the line.”

“Yeah, I thought he might but figured you would tell him to fuck off so I didn’t get involved. So, how many porns are out there?

Nick smiled, “Not too many. I did only three films and some racy photo shoots before I got a break.”

“You aren’t worried they will come out. My fans tend to be a bit fanatical and everyone assumes I am shagging my staff.”

“I am not proud of some of the things I have done but I can own up to them. I don’t like living lies. That is why I like being your publicist, you are open and honest regardless of consequences and I respect that.”

Adam smiled, “Good because I won’t change and personally I think a shady past makes you even more attractive.”

“Apparently, Brad thinks so too.” They both laughed. Adam really liked Nick and thought he was beautiful. He wished he could control chemistry and make himself hot for Nick. Instead, he was stuck burning for a manic, closeted, cock-tease. That in itself was fucked up and indicative of the self-sabotaging shit that is so prevalent in his life. Adam looked over at Kris wistfully and then turned back to Nick,

“So do we have another club gig after this show?”

“No, thank God. I’m too old to party two nights in a row.”

“Nah, you are probably just out of practice. It is Brad’s last night so we are compelled to do some kind of send off.”

“Brad leaving is enough to perk me up to celebrate. Let’s give him an appropriate send off.”

Brad insisted on going to wildest alternative dance club in town. Adam invited everyone on the tour warning it was a risqué nightclub. Adam was surprised Kris agreed to go even after his band declined. Adam’s own band went since there only requirement for a night out was booze. Adam, Brad and his band dressed appropriately in leather while Nick had on off white cargo pants with a beige sweater and Kris wore jeans and a black button down shirt. Kris at least was trying but Nick seemed to just not care.

“It is my going away party so you should at least try to look fabulous. It is a nightclub not a café. You have a hot body so you should be in skin tight leather fuck me pants and shirtless.”

“Well, after all due consideration…no. Come on, party boy let’s go send you off.”

They got to the club and Adam loved the ambiance. It was very ornate inside and people were dressed up in lots of leather, lace and metal. Adam glanced at Kris and Jake and tried not to smile at their expressions. They grabbed a couple tables near the dance floor. Adam sat down and was pleased to see Kris sit next to him.

“Are you OK with this club?”

“Not really my thing but I am all for new experiences.”

Adam tried not to get sucked into Kris’ cuteness. He tried to remember Kris’ manic behavior and game playing but all he could focus on was his alluring brown eyes and tight ass. Kris whispered to Adam,

“So this is what it is like in a gay club?” Kris motioned toward two guys making out very aggressively a few feet away.

Luckily, it didn’t take Kris long to be an asshole, “Yeah, Kris, every gay club is exactly the same everywhere in the world. Be careful when you go to the bath room, because all gay men fuck in there.”

Kris looked at Adam confused and just shrugged. Unfortunately Brad had overheard Adam’s response.

“What’s the matter, straight boy, is the club to gay for you?”

Nick pushed Brad, “Just because it is your party, it doesn’t mean you get to be an asshole all night.”

Brad glared at Nick, “I hope this club does not upset your MO of getting Adam drunk in order to pick up chicks together?”

“My Modus Operandi? One time doesn’t even make it predictable much less my ‘MO’. Speaking of not being predictable maybe you can go meet someone and get laid before they recognize your tiresome personality.”

“Fuck you. You are the only person I know that doesn’t like me.”

“Count again, Brad.” Kris added with a fake smile.

“You don’t count because I am cockblocking you. Besides, both you and Nick are basically straight so neither is an appropriate judge of my fabulousness.”

“If you think I am so straight, why do you keep wasting your time flirting with me? Doesn’t that seem like a total waste of time?”

Brad shrugged, “Adam does it with Kris and he seems to like it well enough. I figured I’d give it a shot too.”

Adam decided to just ignore the comment. A very intimidating bald, tattooed, pierced man approached. He was extremely buff and looked like a serious biker slash skinhead type. He walked up to the table and stared at Nick lustfully, “Do you want to dance pretty, boy?”

Adam sat up straighter and Jake looked to be preparing himself for a fight. Nick looked at the guy and flashed his Hollywood smile,

“I’d loved to.” Nick got up and followed the guy to the dance floor. Everyone’s jaw dropped as they watched Nick get led to the dance floor by Biker Bob and then proceeded to let himself be manhandled.

Adam recovered first, “I totally didn’t see that coming.”

“That is his type? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. I would not have pegged him for a bottom. There you go, Adam, he is more your type.”

Adam noticed Kris tense up, “Brad, I thought you told me Adam already fucked Nick. Wouldn’t he know his type by now?”

Brad looked at Kris like he was a moron and responded slowly, “No, Kris, I said I walked in on them in bed. I can’t help it if you always assume the worst of Adam.”

That certainly explained the cold shoulder after his performance. For the 100th time, Adam was happy Brad was taking a hiatus from the being his PA. Adam looked at Kris, “You thought I was sleeping with Nick?”

“Well…yeah I guess I did. I was hoping it wasn’t true but Brad…”

“Is that why you blew me off after my set?”

“I’m sorry. I just…I’m a jerk.”

“You really are but at least you are a hot jerk.” Adam smiled at Kris and then glared at Brad, “Why did you do that, Brad? You can stop being overprotective now.”

“Really? Because when this asshole fucks you over again who are you going to call? You always let people take advantage. I should know better than anyone. Now, get off my case. It is my goodbye party and I am having to watch you flirt with Kris and Nick dry hump that biker freak. Needless to say, this is kind of a shitty night for me so don’t compound it by scolding me.”

Adam laughed at Brad’s perception of the night. “Hey Babe, it could be worse, at least you are wearing a cool outfit.” Brad gave him the bird.

“Excuse me but I need to heal my ego and that hot man has been staring at me. So if straight boy turns you down, don’t expect a pity fuck from me.” Brad went over to another table.

Adam laughed and then turned to Kris who was smiling too.

“I’m sorry for assuming you were with Nick. It seemed plausible and I wouldn’t have blamed you for moving on. Nick is obviously a lot more comfortable with his sexuality.”

Adam looked over and saw Nick and the biker guy being quite lewd on the dance floor. Adam hadn’t realized Nick liked aggressive men, maybe that had been the missing element that would have tempted him. No, he was screwed and stuck lusting after Kris even though it meant at best he would be Kris’ dirty secret.

“You want to dance, don’t you?”

Adam nodded, “Do you mind?”

“No, but I am not that good.”

Adam wasn’t sure he heard Kris correctly, “You are willing to go on a public dance floor and dance with me?”

“Yeah but don’t expect me to be as uninhibited as Nick.”

Adam smiled and pulled Kris on the dance floor. Somewhere in the back of Adam’s mind, he recognized this would probably end badly. As usual, Adam’s desire to touch Kris was at the forefront clouding the rest. Fuck it, I may as well enjoy it before the wreckage ensues. Adam pulled Kris close to him and tried to show some restraint dancing with him. Kris, however, was making it difficult by putting his hands on Adam’s hips and staring at him lustfully. Adam felt himself get hard as Kris pushed his own erection against Adam’s leg.

“I am like a dog in heat around you. I am not usually like this and it scares me.”

Adam looked at Kris, “Scares me too especially when it usually doesn’t end well.”

“I’m pretty buzzed, right now. Let’s go back to my hotel room. I want to be with you and I think I have enough liquid courage to follow through.”

Adam stiffened. So Kris needed to be three sheets to the wind to fuck him. Nice. Would he wake up with the urge to gnaw off his arm to get away in the morning. Fuck this. Adam turned and walked away leaving Kris on the dance floor. He went by Brad who was working on hooking up with a guy. Brad looked over at Adam and rolled his eyes,

“You have got to be kidding me. He fucked you over already?”

“I want to leave.”

“So the party is over for all of us, Diva?”

Adam was hurt by Kris’ words and wanted to get even. He saw Kris looking over upset. Adam reacted by pulling Brad toward him,

“Maybe the party is just getting started.” Adam kissed Brad long and deep.

Brad pulled away, “I told you know pity fucks tonight. Stop fucking up my game. Go bother Nick he’s apparently a twink and exercising seriously bad taste. Go molest him. I have a good thing going here.” Brad climbed on the guy he was hitting on’s lap and proceeded to make out with him. Adam was annoyed that is attempt to get even was foiled. He decided to follow Brad’s advice and go find Nick. Adam knew it was a pathetic gesture but he was drunk and hurt.


	24. Chapter 24

Expansion. Kris surprised everyone by agreeing to go to a gay club for Brad’s going away. He had two main reasons for agreeing. First, it would piss Brad off and second, he was genuinely curious about what it would be like. Aside from the limited experiences he had with Adam, Kris really wasn’t sure about the mechanics homosexuality. He had been too paranoid of getting caught to look it up on the web and had no gay friends to ask. So, that was why Kris found himself uncomfortably settled at a table in an intimidating dance club.

The club had S&M overtones and the clientele was extremely eclectic. Kris also noticed numerous same sex couples indulging in various levels of intimacy. Kris was glad Adam was sitting next to him and he wondered if this was a typical gay club. He was caught off guard when Adam snapped at him for asking. Brad overhearing didn’t help matters. Kris decided to just keep his mouth shut and ignore Brad’s attempts to cut him down. Kris noticed a scary man looking over at their table. He was around 6’2 and about 225 pounds of solid mass. His arms were completely tattooed and he was sporting piercings in his nose, eyebrow, and ears. He also had beads in his goatee. Kris assumed he was either an excon or a hell’s angel and hoped he wasn’t looking for trouble.

The man approached the table staring at Nick who was looking more like a gap model than a clubber. Kris noticed everyone tense at the table but the guy was focused exclusively on Nick and spoke to him direct,

“Do you want to dance, pretty boy?”

Kris almost choked on his drink and did when Nick cheerfully agreed. He heard Brad and Adam voice their surprise at Nick’s taste in men. Brad went on to suggest Nick was more Adam’s type meaning he was a catcher. Kris realized Brad had lied or at least seriously exaggerated Adam and Nick’s relationship since this was a revelation. He was not about to let it pass,

“Brad, I thought you told me Adam already fucked Nick. Wouldn’t he know his type by now?”

Of course Brad responded in a manner to make Kris look bad. “No, Kris, I said I walked in on them in bed. I can’t help it if you always assume the worst of Adam.”

He seemed to succeed because the next question came from Adam, “You thought I was sleeping with Nick?”

“Well…yeah I guess I did. I was hoping it wasn’t true but Brad…” Kris knew it sounded lame.

“Is that why you blew me off after my set?”

Kris didn’t know what to say to make it better so he decided to simply apologize, “I’m sorry. I just…I’m a jerk.” Why didn’t he just ask Adam? They seemed to keep getting their lines crossed and misinterpreting things. Luckily, Adam seemed to lighten up and lay into Brad. Brad responded by throwing a bit of a hissy fit and leaving to join another table. Good riddance. Kris sat in companionable silence with Adam and thought about Adam’s “type”. It was apparent from Brad’s comments, Adam liked being the “man” in the relationship. Would that mean Kris would be relegated into being the “girl”? Kris had an idea how gay sex worked and wasn’t sold on being the catcher. It looked painful and he didn’t see a mutual benefit.

He was attracted to Adam but he was really nervous about the sex. A year ago, he would never have imagined giving a man a blowjob but he had given one to Adam. Even more surprising, he liked it and enjoyed making Adam feel good. Maybe he would be able to handle more. Kris downed his drink and ordered another when the cocktail waitress came by. He was drinking Long Islands on top of the shots he had done with his band after their set. Perhaps, if he was buzzed he’d be able to relax enough to have sex with Adam.

Kris could tell Adam wanted to dance and he felt bad about his earlier comments. In an attempt to extend an olive branch, Kris asked Adam to dance. He knew there was a risk someone could capture their image on their camera but it would just be a dance. He was willing to take the chance since it would make Adam happy. They went on the dance floor and Kris had underestimated just how sexy a dancer Adam could be. He immediately became hard and moved closer to Adam. After a few moments he pressed himself against Adam’s leg and confessed,

“I am like a dog in heat around you. I am not usually like this and it scares me.”

“Scares me too especially when it usually doesn’t end well.”

Kris wanted to be with Adam and wanted to go all the way. Although he was still very nervous he needed to know if they would work on a physical level.

“I’m pretty buzzed, right now. Let’s go back to my hotel room. I want to be with you and I think I have enough liquid courage to follow through.”

Kris felt Adam stiffen and wondered what was wrong. He was further surprised when Adam abandoned him on the dance floor. Kris followed him a few moments later and saw Adam go over to Brad and kiss him. What the fuck? He could have just said no. Kris was genuinely confused and could not figure out what he did wrong.

Kris watched as Brad pushed Adam away and sat on another man’s lap. Kris was starting to feel dizzy and decided to just get some water. It was obvious Adam did not want to go home with him. Jake came over to check on Kris.

“Everything OK, Mr. Allen?”

“Fine. I think I may leave soon.”

“Do you want me to get the car?”

“Yeah.”

Kris went to go find Adam and saw he was by Nick and Biker Bob. Kris went over by them and heard Nick scolding Adam,

“…You and Brad may practice no boundaries but we have them, Adam. One of them is you don’t try to manhandle me while I am obviously scoring. Let me clarify, you never manhandle me because I don’t sleep with people I work for. I am sorry you and Kris here seem to be going in circles but I don’t think making each other jealous will fix it. Now go run along and keep in mind we are checking out of the hotel by ten tomorrow morning.” Nick turned back to his friend and apologized for the interruption. The guy responded by kissing him.

Adam just turned and practically bumped into Kris as he tried to walk away. Kris could tell he was annoyed so just said what he had come to say,

“Hey man, I think I am just going to go back to the hotel. I am sorry if I was too forward.”

“You mean too honest. I don’t appreciate lovers that need beer goggles to fool around with me.”

Kris was shocked at Adam’s interpretation of his statement, “What! Adam, you know I think you are gorgeous and I am attracted to you. For chrissake, I want you so bad I am reinterpreted my own sexuality. You couldn’t be that insecure to think I would only be with you because I am drunk.”

Adam looked down, “Maybe I overreacted a little.”

“A little? Is that why you tried to make out with Brad and apparently Nick too?”

Adam blushed, “Maybe. You are driving me crazy, Kris. Do you want me or not?”

“I want you but I am scared. I am not sure I am your type, you know what I mean?”

“Oh honey, trust me, you are definitely my type. You are cute, small, and smart.”

“No, I mean…sexually. I am not sure how it all works but I gather you like…being on top.”

Adam looked confused and Kris was flaming red with embarrassment trying to talk about sex. Adam laughed,

“And you are not sure you want to be on the bottom?”

“Yeah.”

“It is a preference thing and both have its perks. I don’t want you doing things you are uncomfortable about so we can take it one step at a time. At this point, I’d settle for becoming better friends. Well, maybe a little more than friends because I like kissing you.”

Kris laughed, “I like kissing you too. I also like touching you and tasting you.”

“Is the offer to go back to your room still on the table?”

“Yeah, as long as you promise to be patient with me and not freak out if I get nervous.” When Kris looked into Adam’s eyes he saw nothing but affection and wondered why he had even worried about being nervous. In fact, all the times Kris had been with Adam he had felt more comfortable and “right” then ever before.

Adam smiled sincerely, “I can do that.”

+++

Leave it to Brad to hold a grudge. Adam was hurting and desperately needed to try and make Kris jealous. He spotted Nick and proceeded to try and use him to get back at Kris. Nick was sitting alone and Adam sat next to him.

“Where is your friend?”

“Getting me a drink. What’s going on?”

Adam looked at Nick and pulled him into a passionate kiss. Similar to Brad, Nick pushed him away. Nick however was really pissed.

“If you weren’t my client I’d knock you the fuck out. You and Brad may practice no boundaries but we have them, Adam. One of them is you don’t try to manhandle me while I am obviously scoring. Let me clarify, you never manhandle me because I don’t sleep with people I work for. I am sorry you and Kris here seem to be going in circles but I don’t think making each other jealous will fix it. Now go run along and keep in mind we are checking out of the hotel by ten tomorrow morning.” Adam noticed, Nick’s friend had returned and had sat down on the other side of Nick. Nick turned to his friend and apologized for Adam’s behavior. The guy just responded by kissing him and ignoring Adam’s presence.

Adam felt thoroughly chastised and turned to leave in shame. Of course he crashed right into the last person he wanted to see, Kris Allen. Adam felt further humiliated when he realized he had totally misinterpreted Kris’ words but was elated when Kris agreed to take him back to his room. They really needed to communicate better.

Adam let everyone know he was leaving and departed with Jake and Kris. Brad must have been about to seal the deal with his new friend because he did not try to stop Adam. They arrived at the hotel and went straight to Kris’ room. Adam sat down on the bed. Kris seemed to hesitate and Adam assumed he was nervous.

“How about I just give you a massage? It will relax you and allows me to molest you under a non-creepy guise.”

“Really? I would love that.”

“Then I definitely think we should do that.” Adam really did love touching Kris. His skin was incredibly soft and his body so responsive that it turned Adam on to no end. Adam grabbed the hotel’s complimentary body oil and stripped down to his boxer briefs. Kris had already stripped and gotten under the sheet. Adam went over feeling a slight case of déjà vu and smiled thinking how different their positions were this time around. Adam was actually the one with the number one single and all the insane fans. Rick had told Adam before he joined the tour, he would be treated better than a usual opening act. Adam had nothing to compare it to so he assumed it was true. When all was said and done, Adam’s was better off having met Kris Allen.

Adam went over by the bed and adjusted the sheet so he could reach his lower back and view the top of Kris’ ass. Adam straddled Kris hips which was not the most professional technique but pleasant for the massager. Adam began massaging Kris’ back and loved the moans he was coaxing out of Kris. He ran his hand over Kris’ ass. Adam was getting very hard and worried Kris would get nervous. He moved off him and lowered the sheet. Adam ran his fingertips over Kris’ ass.

“Is that a new massage technique?”

Adam giggled, “Yeah, it goes along with this one.” Adam ran his tongue down the crack of Kris ass which caused Kris to jump. “Sorry, beautiful, I couldn’t resist.”

Adam needed to show a little restraint before he totally jumped Kris. Adam placed his hands on Kris buttocks and started massaging deep into the muscle in the hollow of his hips. Adam let his thumbs fall between Kris’ cheeks and started rubbing around his entrance. Kris opened his legs slightly to allow Adam better access. Adam lost it and replaced his thumbs with his tongue. He ran his tongue around Kris’ entrance and then penetrated him with the tip of his tongue.

“Holy shit! What are you doing? Adam?”

“Do you want me to stop?”

“I don’t know.”

Adam decided to take that response as ‘don’t stop’ and continued penetrating Kris with his tongue. He could feel Kris writhing with pleasure. Kris probably had no idea how sexy his responsive body was. As good as Brad was in bed, even he did not respond with such innocent abandonment. Adam wanted nothing more than to feel Kris come apart in his arms. He was using every ounce of self control not to mount him.

Adam ran his hand up and down the back and inside of Kris’ thighs. “Turnover, baby.”

Kris rolled onto his back and his erect penis bobbed in the air. Adam caught it and ran his hand down the shaft. “Gorgeous.” Adam followed his hand with his tongue and then took all of Kris in his mouth. Adam positioned himself on his knees between Kris leg and bent over Kris so he could suck him deep. Kris was having a hard time staying still Adam was trying to steady him with his hands. Kris was close. Adam moved off his cock and heard Kris whimper, “Please don’t stop.”

“Patience, baby, I will come back.” Adam suckled Kris testicles gently giving him a chance to settle down a bit. Adam moistened his fingers and placed one digit into Kris and moved it around until he felt Kris jump. Kris stared up at him wide eyed. Adam smiled and began moving his finger in and out ensuring he kept hitting Kris’ prostate.

“That feels amazing, Adam.”

“You feel amazing. Tell me if it is too much.” Adam added a second finger and felt Kris tense. Adam started sucking Kris’ cock again which distracted Kris from the discomfort of being stretched.

“Do you want to fuck me, Adam? I want you to fuck me.”

Adam practically came from his words. “Kris, I want to be in you so bad.” Adam decided for the first time ever he would not be ruled by his lust. His feelings for Kris were too strong to risk pushing too far and losing him. Adam sucked Kris harder and faster while he fucked him with his fingers. Kris stiffened and came hard with a scream. Adam felt Kris completely come apart in his arms. Adam smiled and grabbed a towel while Kris regained control of himself.

Kris looked at Adam like he was still in shock, “Adam, that-that was beyond amazing. I have never felt…omigod…you are an amazing lover.” Kris noticed Adam’s raging hard-on, “Sorry, can I return the favor? You can…you know.”

“No, it is too much. Frankly, I am declining for my own preservation. If I make love to you, I’ll be lost forever. Just kiss me and touch me.” Kris grabbed the oil and poured it into his hands while looking at Adam lustfully. Adam rolled onto his back and gave into the incredible sensation of having Kris Allen jerk him off. Maybe because Kris was new to cock he seemed to be enthralled with Adam’s penis which turned Adam on more. Kris was watching Adam intently as he stroked him toward an orgasm. Adam came and felt all his energy pour out of him along with his semen. He was very satiated and happy. Adam was sleepy,

“Can I stay the night?”

“Stay forever.”


	25. Chapter 25

Ecstasy. A massage sounded amazing to Kris and it would give him a chance to regroup. Adam in his hotel room was larger than life and he was feeling anxious. Adam rummaged through the complimentary hotel supplies while Kris got undressed. He definitely decided to forgo the underwear on this massage. Kris almost laughed as he noticed he already had a semi-hard-on. He felt Adam readjust the sheet and then his warm hands on his back. Kris immediately relaxed and thought about the last time he received a massage from Adam. That was the first time he had received a blow job from a man and it had been amazing. Kris also cringed because that was the start of his many screw ups. That night he had become nervous, threw money at Adam and ran out of the room. It seemed so long ago.

Kris felt Adam’s fingertips move across his ass and joked about his technique. Adam responded lightly which continued to relax Kris until he felt Adam’s tongue along the crack of his ass. No one has ever done that before. Adam continued to massage Kris’ ass which felt great. Kris jumped again when he felt Adam’s fingers near his entrance and then again when he felt something moist. Holy shit that is his tongue. Katy definitely would never have done something so dirty and forbidden. Kris was embarrassed and wasn’t sure about it but it did feel incredible. No wonder Brad kept trying to keep Adam as a lover.

Adam stopped and spoke, “Turnover, baby.”

Kris rolled onto his back and blushed as his painfully erect penis bobbed in the air. Adam’s expression belayed his joy in turning Kris on so much. Adam stroked Kris’ cock as he murmured his appreciation, “Gorgeous.” Adam followed his hand with his tongue and then took all of Kris in his mouth. Kris moaned aloud and could not stop himself from thrusting in ecstasy. He was close and was torn between wanting it to last and needing to come. Adam made the decision for him by stopping and readjusting his position. Kris found himself begging Adam to continue. Adam smiled mischievously as Kris felt his finger penetrate where his tongue had been earlier. Kris loved it until he felt slight pain as Adam placed another finger inside him. Kris tensed and thought about how painful Adam’s cock would be especially since Adam was definitely a big boy. A few seconds later he forgot about the pain as Adam began blowing him again.

“Do you want to fuck me, Adam? I want you to fuck me.” Kris was surprised he said his thought aloud. He was never one to demand sex or express his needs in the bedroom. Kris was also shocked that his fear had been so easily replaced with raw need. He wanted Adam in him and was perfectly willing to bottom. Kris was a little disappointed when Adam just continued to suck his cock until Kris came. Still, the disappointment was short lived when it was still by far the best sexual experience he had had to date.

Kris was reveling in the afterglow when he noticed Adam’s erection as he brought him a towel. Kris would not make the mistake of leaving Adam hanging again.

“Sorry, can I return the favor? You can…you know.” Kris was a little more nervous since coming about Adam penetrating him but he was willing. He was relieved when Adam declined and just wanted a hand job. Kris focused on making it good. He was completely enthralled with Adam’s cock. The size, the weight and fullness was incredible. Kris wasn’t convinced he would be able to take Adam penetrating him but almost wanted to get it over with. He was scared of having sex with Adam and even more frightened of the implication that he liked being fucked by a man. Not the time for soul searching. Focus on making Adam feel good. Kris succeeded at least with the latter has Adam exploded in his hands.

Kris grabbed the towel and wiped himself and Adam. As he finished he heard Adam ask in a vulnerable voice, “Can I stay the night?”

Kris never wanted Adam to leave and said as much, “Stay forever.”

Adam smiled and pulled Kris into him and immediately fell asleep. Kris felt warm, safe and cherished. Kris could not believe after everything that had gone on, he was laying naked in Adam’s arms. Kris had no idea what this meant to his sexuality but he did know without a doubt that he loved the man next to him. Kris gave in to sleep.

Kris woke up as he felt the weight shift on his bed and suddenly felt cold. He opened his eyes and saw Adam quietly pulling on his pants.

“Where are you going, beautiful?” Kris inquired.

Adam looked over and smiled, “I have to go pack. We are checking out at ten because I have an interview at eleven.”

“Come here.”

Adam came over by Kris and stood there looking adorably vulnerable. Kris pulled Adam to him and kissed him deeply. Adam seemed to hesitate a moment and then returned the kiss passionately and soon climbed back in the bed.

“I was worried you would freak out.”

“I might have if you left without saying goodbye. I really like you, Adam.”

“Good because I am not sure I could give you up despite the risks of being with you. I have to go, baby.” Adam kissed him for a few minutes and then left. Kris got up and took two aspirin. He met with his staff and was happy to learn he had no interviews that day. They were scheduled to depart at two after Adam’s interviews. Kris decided to hit the pool for a swim to clear his head. He had two hours before checking out. Unfortunately Brad must have stayed back from Adam’s interviews to enjoy the hotel.

Kris didn’t even feel like feigning friendliness, “Shouldn’t you be with Adam?”

“Nope, I am off the clock until after the tour. I am going to my family’s house tonight and then back to LA next week. So did Adam stay with you last night?”

“It is none of your business.”

“Whatever, bitch, Adam tells me everything anyway and he said he was with you.”

Kris got annoyed, “Brad, I like Adam a lot and I am sick of you trying to keep us apart.”

“I am glad you like him but unfortunately you are a douche bag and keep getting him in trouble. You must admit an awful lot of bad things have happened to him either as a direct result of your actions or your failing to prevent something from happening.”

“OK. You are right I screwed up a lot but I care about him and I am going to try to treat him right.”

Brad paused and looked at Kris, “Well, I am glad to hear that but how do you plan to keep Adam interested? Adam has been lusting after you because you are the one that got away. Once you give it up, he is going to move on. He’s got a fucking hot, and I mean hawt, pornstar publicist. How do you propose to compete? Adam likes sexually creative people. I saw one of Nick’s pornos and he is certainly creative. Your other obstacle is Adam goes through men like I go through hair gel. Before and after me, Adam has never been with anyone longer than a few weeks. He is fickle.”

Kris didn’t know how to respond because all along he had a fear Adam would lose interest. He wasn’t exactly the most out of the box guy and Adam seemed to like interesting people. Still, he didn’t want to show Brad he was insecure.

“Maybe he is finally ready to settle down again.”

Brad laughed, “Sure, Kris, maybe he will also be willing to tone himself down and not be so wild. Adam is a very sexual guy and he has no self control. You seem like a monogamous, vanilla kind of guy so I think the likelihood of you two making it is slim at best. Look, I just think you could save yourself a lot of heartache by acknowledging you aren’t good for each other and move on.”

“I can’t. Believe me, if I could I would have for both our sakes. I think I am in love with him.”

Brad stared at Kris, “Honey, if that is true you are in for a bad ride. Adam is a master at breaking hearts including his own. I’ve said my piece and won’t be on the tour to sabotage you. If I find out you intentionally hurt him again, I will fly out to the tour to kick you ass.”

“Whatever, take care Brad.”

“You too, Kris. Watch out for Nick.”

Brad left the pool area and Kris just sat there. He knew Brad was an asshole and purposely trying to fuck with him but he did have some points. Nick was a threat. The guy was gorgeous and apparently a sex god. Kris swam a few laps and then went back to his room to pack. Adam and Nick showed back up at two to get on the buses. Kris watched Brad saying goodbye to Adam. Brad smirked at Kris before kissing Adam long and deep. Adam kissed him back a few moments and then pulled back. Brad went to kiss Nick but Nick just turned his head and patted Brad on the back.

They loaded into their tour buses. The label had sprung for a tour bus for Adam and his band. It was not as fancy as Kris’ but it was comfortable. Kris had not spoken to Adam since the morning and was starting to freak out a little about the night before. Kris overheard his band gossiping about Nick saying they heard from Adam’s band that he hooked up with some S&M guy. Kris listened as Nick went from being a cool guy to a disgusting freak. Kris had been feigning sleep and wondered if that was why they were being so honestly hostile toward homosexuality. The negativity he heard further instilled fear into Kris. Kris was not ready to deal with the hate. In a way, he admired Brad for his ability to be so over the top and not care if people laughed at him. Kris was not like that. He could feel himself panicking. Kris needed to distance himself from Adam and think about what he really wanted and all the repercussions of his decision.

They arrived at the new hotel in New Mexico late that night. Jade and Nick were sorting out the rooms while everyone else relaxed in the lobby. Adam came over by Kris.

“Hi, how has your day been?”

Kris tried to keep his voice even, “Fine. How was your interview?”

“Same old questions. You want to have a drink when we get our rooms?”

“I have a radio interview in the morning. I should just go straight to bed.”

Adam looked at Kris, “You flipped, didn’t you?”

“I’m just tired, OK.”

“Whatever. I’ll see you around.” Adam walked away and Kris just watched him. Why couldn’t Adam just give him some time to adjust? Adam went by his band. Kris watched Nick walking over to them and noticed him walking a little funny. That did nothing to calm Kris down. Adam’s band seemed annoyed and pointed to Kris’ group. Adam’s bassist was yelling,

“Why does Adam have to share a room and not Kris? He’s the one with the fucking number one hit and the only reason his shows are finally selling out.”

Adam just raised his hand up to quiet them all, “Tommy, it is no big deal. I shared a room with Nick and Brad in Texas so this is clearly a step up. It is for two nights, who gives a shit. We are the opening act and that is how it rolls. I don’t mind so why should you? I like rooming with Nick, he’s purdy.”

Nick looked at Adam annoyed, “Please don’t channel the spirit of Brad. Tomorrow is an early start so everyone needs to just get some sleep.”

Kris watched Adam follow Nick out of the lobby. Kris felt jealous and knew it was his own fault for pulling back from Adam. Kris went to his room and laid awake for an hour convincing himself Adam was screwing Nick. Unable to take it anymore, he went to Adam and Nick’s room. Kris knocked and heard rumbling around. Adam answered in sweat pants and smelled like coconut oil. Kris stepped inside and saw Nick laying on his stomach with just a towel covering his ass. He had obviously been enjoying one of Adam’s infamous massages.

Kris was pissed and starting to freak as he heard Adam’s voice, “Hey, Kris, I thought you were tired?”

“Fuck you. Go back to your new conquest.” Kris walked out and started hyperventilating as he made his way back to his room.

+++

Adam woke up with Kris in his arms and thought life could not be more perfect. Adam had worried Kris would freak out in the morning and was relieved when Kris awoke still into him. After exchanging some passionate kisses, Adam had to head back to his room to pack, checkout and go to his interviews. He got back to Nick’s room and of course Brad and Nick were there. Brad laid into him immediately,

“Where the fuck did you sleep last night?”

“Brad, we are not dating, I don’t owe you an answer.”

“It was my last night and you and Nick here left me.”

“Quit the dramatics. You blew me off remember? I came to you and you told me to get lost.”

Brad thought for a minute, “You could have begged better. Anyway, I still want to know where you slept.”

Adam knew Brad would never relent, “I was with Kris.”

Brad shook his head, “You are a glutton for punishment. I am just glad you made it out alive and unhurt. That is more than Nick can say.”

Adam looked over at Nick and noticed he was moving slower than usual. Adam was concerned,

“Are you OK, Nick?”

“I am fine. Look, I know you guys like to share everything but I am not the kiss and tell type so don’t include me. Hurry up we have to get to the radio station in a half hour.”

Adam packed and followed Nick to the lobby. Brad was going to stay behind and enjoy the hotel until they headed out for New Mexico. Brad would then go to his family’s ranch which was a few hours away. Nick shuffled Adam through three different interviews and was very good as both a PA and a publicist. Adam knew Nick was in physical discomfort and tried to ask him again.

“Look, Adam, I’m fine. I had a good time last night and I am sore today. No big deal.”

“Did that guy get rough?”

“Adam, we are not there yet. I appreciate your concern but let’s keep our boundaries. I am physically and emotionally up to my job no worries.”

Adam smiled, “You get kinky, don’t you?”

Nick looked at Adam and then laughed, “I’ve been known to step out of the box. Now, stop flirting with me and sign this stack of photos.”

They went back to the hotel and said goodbye to Brad and Texas. Brad had tried to make out with Adam in front of everyone. At first Adam allowed it out of habit but then remembered Kris was there and stopped Brad. Adam went on his bus and continued signing pictures and catching up on email. He couldn’t wait to be with Kris again. In fact, Adam had a hard time all day staying focused. Every few minutes he would smile thinking about Kris writhing beneath him or Kris asking him to fuck him. That also meant Adam was sporting a semi all day. Luckily, Nick didn’t comment and Brad was absent.

Once they arrived at the hotel, everyone piled into the lobby as Nick and Jade sorted out the rooms. Adam took the opportunity to speak to Kris and try and arrange a rendezvous.

“Hi, how has your day been?”

“Fine. How was your interview?” Adam could tell Kris was tense and uncomfortable. He hoped his gut was wrong and Kris hadn’t changed his mind about them.

Adam answered congenially, “Same old questions. You want to have a drink when we get our rooms?”

Kris appeared distraught, “I have a radio interview in the morning. I should just go straight to bed.”

Adam knew immediately Kris had changed his mind and was blowing him off. It hurt really bad, “You flipped, didn’t you?”

Kris looked down, “I’m just tired, OK.”

Adam was totally crushed, “Whatever. I’ll see you around.” That fucking asshole lifted me up just to slam me to the earth. I am done getting fucked over by Kris Allen. Done! Adam walked away while he still had a small ounce of pride and went by his band. Nick came over and explained there were only a limited amount of rooms so they would all be sharing. Tommy, his quirky bassist, complained but Adam stopped him. In truth, he was glad he would not be alone and Nick was a good alternative. A hurt!Adam was a horny!Adam. This was a blessing in disguise.

They headed to their room. Adam decided to test the waters, “So did you choose me for a roommate for some devious purpose?”

“Actually I thought you would sleep in Kris’ room and I would enjoy a room to myself. Did you two star crossed lovers fuck up again?”

“Yeah, he doesn’t want me now. I think half the day he is hetero and then a few hours a night he goes gay.”

“You sure you didn’t do anything?”

“Yeah because I hadn’t seen him all day. Anyway, I am done with Kris Allen. He is bad for me and making me crazy.”

Nick said he was going to try and take a hot bath to loosen up.

Adam had an idea, “You know I am a licensed masseur. I would be happy to help you out. Just a simple massage.”

Nick looked at Adam suspiciously, “Really? No funny stuff just a real massage?”

“Seriously, I will totally stay professional. I even have coconut massage oil.”

Nick agreed and after a quick shower, laid down on the bed in a towel. Adam noticed he had some red marks on his lower back.

“I am just going to loosen you towel but keep you covered. I can’t ignore the elephant in the room. Did you get whipped last night?”

“You can ignore it just don’t massage my ass. I am already regretting this.”

“Come on, give me a chance. I’ll even massage you in silence.”

Adam began massaging Nick again noticing what a perfect physique he had. Adam found his eyes were enthralled with the red marks he was seeing and he lowered the towel a little to see more. Adam didn’t really understand S&M but he was curious what Nick was into but knew Nick wouldn’t entertain his questions. As with Brad, Adam was able to focus on the massage. In a way, Adam was annoyed that only Kris seemed to hold such physical power over him that he couldn’t resist molesting him. Not to say if Nick made a move, Adam wouldn’t totally go for it. He totally would especially after Kris blew him off. Adam just continued to give him a massage and felt Nick’s muscles relaxing.

Adam heard a knock at the door and was surprised since they didn’t order room service. Adam told Nick to relax a minute and answered the door. He was confused to see Kris and immediately blushed with guilt. Even though he wasn’t doing anything wrong, Adam felt like he sort of was. He tried to sound nonchalant,

“Hey, Kris, I thought you were tired?”

Kris did not look happy and snarled, “Fuck you. Go back to your next conquest.” Kris walked out and Adam became annoyed and slammed the door.

“Fuck! Why can’t he just pick a personality? That was Kris.”

“So I heard. Why don’t you follow him and explain you were just giving me a massage.”

“Why should I? He blew me off. I am a free person and if I want to massage you I will.”

“Well, I am sure this will just make things so much better between you two. Maybe you can fuck a groupie in his tour bus too. That should smooth things over. You are an idiot, Adam, but a helluva a masseur. If you aren’t going to go after him, why don’t you finish my massage.”

“Will you tell him nothing happened between us?”

“Nothing did happen between us nor will anything happen between us so I will gladly tell Kris the truth. You need to be patient with him and both of you need to stop over-reacting. Maybe you should scale back on the sex and talk more as friends instead of fighting and making up all the time. It is way too volatile a relationship.”

“I need to do something different because he is breaking my heart.”


	26. Chapter 26

Patience. Kris got back to his room and just felt sick with jealousy and heartbreak. Adam apparently doesn’t waste time moving from lover to lover. Kris should have expected it after all Adam is still sleeping with Brad. Maybe that is how men are in homosexual relationships. Kris was not a possessive person but he didn’t do open relationships. He liked dating people exclusively not that he had even dated at all but still. Kris’ alarm went off and he realized he would have to face the day with no sleep. Luckily it was radio interviews in the morning and might get a nap before the show.

Kris said a few stupid things during the radio show since he was half dead. Jason tried to coach him but Kris was getting annoyed. The DJ brought up Adam,

“So how is it touring with the wild Glambert? Do you guys party together?”

“No, he stays far too busy screwing his staff.” Kris heard the silence and then awkward laughs and realized he had spoken out loud. Jason was pale. Kris tried to cover it up, “That was a joke. We get along but don’t hang out much.”

“Any truth to the rumor he hired a former gay porn star as his publicist?”

Kris was still angry at Nick, “I am not sure how ‘big’ a star he was and I don’t watch gay porn so I couldn’t say. Maybe you should ask Adam to come on the show he’s very open I am sure he would talk about it.”

Jason gave the signal to wrap it up. Kris had a feeling he was going to be in for a big lecture. They left the studio and Jason pulled Kris aside.

“What the fuck was that? How could you totally disrespect Adam and Nick like that? Did something happen between you and Adam?”

“Leave it alone. I am tired so maybe I just didn’t express myself that well.”

“Well if your intent was to tell the world Adam is fucking his pornstar publicist, I’d say you were very effective.”

Kris just wanted to sleep. Kris went back to the hotel and slept for five hours. Jade woke him up with a cup of coffee,

“You need to go to the arena in an hour. I should warn you Jason is livid. Apparently your statement in the interview has gone viral. Perez wrote an article saying if you want to work for Glambert you have to be willing to sleep with him. A bunch of other articles say Adam is using is stardom to get laid and sexually harassing his staff.”

Jason came in and showed Kris a you tube of Adam being accosted by Paparazzi earlier in the day. They asked him about the allegations of sexually harassing his staff.

Adam laughed, “My staff? First, I only have like two people working for me. Second, there are no allegations. I think Kris Allen was referring to my personal assistant who is actually my ex-boyfriend. Yeah after a few drinks I’ve been know to backslide and sleep with my ex. Who doesn’t?”

“What about your publicist?”

“I think he has better offers.”

“Was he a pornstar?”

“I think he did some stuff when he was younger but I wouldn’t say he was a ‘porn star’. He is a nice guy and a great publicist. So who cares?”

“Do you think maybe Kris Allen is jealous and wants to sleep with you?”

“I think Kris just wasn’t filtering properly and misspoke. He sometimes gets flustered in interviews. Thanks guys I have to do a sound check.”

The video ended and Jason turned to Kris,

“That is why Adam is going to be a mega star and his publicist can take the afternoon off while I struggle to make you not look like a chump. I am sorry I am being an asshole but you can’t take your personal issues to the media and expect not to get ridiculed. You are making my job hard.”

Kris felt like shit and just went to the arena avoiding all cameras. He did his sound check and tried to keep to himself. He saw Nick and went over to him hoping he didn’t get punched out.

“Sorry, Nick. I didn’t mean to be such a dick on the radio.”

Nick smiled, “I thought it was funny actually but it probably didn’t make Jason too happy.”

“You aren’t mad?”

“No, Kris. For the record, I didn’t do anything with Adam. It was just an innocent massage.”

Kris looked down, “How mad is Adam at me?”

“He’s mad alright but he is more hurt than anything else. You rejected him, assumed the worst and accused him of being a slut to the world. That was pretty mean and not the way to win him over.”

“I know I am totally fucking this up. I am so confused and I have no one to talk to.”

“Talk to Adam. Why don’t you just tell him how you really feel? If you want to just be friends tell him that. If you want to be more, then tell him that too. Why is this so hard?”

“It’s hard because I’m scared of the sex and scared of the stigma of being gay.”

“What?”

“I saw you after you went with the Biker guy and…and you looked uncomfortable.”

“OK, that was something totally different. I don’t get the sense that Adam is a rough lover so I wouldn’t worry about the pain. It shouldn’t hurt that bad if he does it right.”

“Well than what did that guy do to you?”

“Look, I like having rough sex every now and then. I enjoy sex and I tend to try anything and everything so I wouldn’t use my experience as a gauge. For the record, I knew that guy before that night. I wouldn’t have gone home with a complete stranger and engaged in that type of sex with someone I just met.”

“How did you know him?”

Nick shrugged, “I’ve spent some time in San Antonio and it’s a pretty small gay scene. So you get to know people and gay men talk. You hear when people are assholes. Anyway, that is neither here nor there since you are not looking to come out and join a scene.”

“No, I am not but I don’t think I will be able to keep Adam a secret.”

“You won’t. The heat between you two is way too obvious and Adam is like an open book with his body language. No, if you guys hook up everyone on tour will know. What do you care? You can replace your band if they don’t like it.”

“I like my band. My family will be disappointed if I decide to forgo a family to be with a guy. I don’t want everyone looking at me like I am a fag that takes it up the ass. It is humiliating.”

Nick smiled, “Try having it on video. You are young Kris, in a few years you won’t give a shit what people think. I am thirty seven and really could care less what people think or say about me. At the end of the day, I live with my choices and I have to accept the consequences. You need to decide and communicate that decision to Adam. He likes you a lot and you are jerking him around. It’s not fair.”

Kris knew Nick was right. Adam came into the room to do his stage makeup. Kris went over by him hoping to make up.

“I am so sorry about what I said on the radio.”

Adam looked up at him with sad eyes, “Why did you say it?”

“I was jealous. I can’t stand the thought of you touching another man and I was mad about Nick. I didn’t sleep before the interview and fucked up. If it is any consolation, I am in trouble for it.”

Adam laughed, “Well, than I won’t add to your punishment. Kris, you have nothing to be jealous about. After everything I have endured to be with you, do you think I would just move on so quick?”

Kris shrugged, “Brad said-“

“Stop right there. Brad is an actor and he lies. Please tell me you didn’t blow me off because of some bullshit Brad said.” Adam ran a hand through his hair like he was frustrated, “Maybe we should step back and become friends before deciding to get intimate.”

“You would be OK with that?”

“I’d rather go slow and consistent than this vacillating shit we have going on. I can’t take the highs and the lows anymore especially when the highs are so high and the lows so low. I don’t think I have ever wanted someone as much as I want you. More than that, I want you in my life even if it is just as a friend.”

Kris hugged Adam and loved feeling Adam return the affection, “So how will we know when to take it further?”

Adam seemed to think for a minute, “I don’t know, I’ll ask Nick it was his advice to slow down and be friends. I would never think of giving sex up on my own.” Kris and Adam both started laughing. Hopefully, things would start going smoother.

+++

Adam woke up the next morning and followed Nick to the gym. Apparently, he and Jake had started working out together. After a half hour of them kicking his ass with weights, Adam opted for the treadmill and promised himself never to submit to their torture again. Taut abs were not worth that much pain. Adam watched as the guys trained more seriously. He overheard Jake talking about his wife’s obsession with placemats. Nick joked his ex wife used to change their living room motif every thirty days and it drove him nuts. Adam liked how Nick seemed to be able to identify with everyone and seemed so comfortable in his skin. Adam had long learned to be comfortable with himself but he still questioned himself occasionally and often overcompensated. Nick just seemed to be content.

Adam let curiosity get to him, “How long were you married, Nick?”

“Four years. Two of which were pretty good but the last two…We were not compatible and wanted different things.”

“Are you still friends?”

“No, we were never friends. I run into her every now and then and we are civil to one another. It was a volatile relationship and a nasty divorce. She remarried last year and her new husband seems like a good guy.”

“Did you love her?”

“Enough to marry her. Actually, that is how I learned being head over heels for someone does not mean you can live with them. We were like oil and water. When it was good it was off the charts when it was bad it became dangerous. I think if we stayed together one of us would have ended up dead. If I marry again, I am going to pick someone with an even temperament.”

“Would you consider a man?”

“I wouldn’t rule it out but I don’t usually get serious with men. I prefer to date women.”

For some reason Adam was perturbed by Nick’s and questioned icily, “So you date women and fuck men?”

Nick looked at Adam, “Well technically I don’t usually ‘fuck’ men but that is neither here nor there. Why are you getting snippy with me? If you don’t like my answers, ask rhetorical questions.”

Adam laughed, “Sorry, I’m just cranky. I am going to go shower. What do I have next?”

“Sound check at three, a couple interviews at five and then you go on at eight. Be ready to go by two thirty.”

Adam went back to their room and just showered and relaxed. He checked his email and tuned into Kris’ interview. He heard Kris’ voice chatting away about the album. Although Adam was still annoyed, he loved listening to Kris’ voice. Adam heard the interviewer mention his name,

“So how is it touring with the wild Glambert? Do you guys party together?”

“No, he stays far too busy screwing his staff.” Oh no he didn’t. Did he just say that on a nationwide broadcast! What the fuck! After an awkward silence Kris continued unconvincingly, “That was a joke. We get along but don’t hang out.” What a dick.

“Any truth to the rumor he hired a former gay porn star as his publicist?”

Mother-fucker, Adam heard Kris reply smugly, “I am not sure how big a star he was and I don’t watch gay porn so I couldn’t say. Maybe you should ask Adam to come on the show he’s very open I am sure he would talk about it.” Adam could not believe Kris was calling him and Nick out like that. In a way it was kind of funny because it showed Kris was jealous. People only get jealous about people they like.

Nick came back into the room. Adam sat up,

“Kris just told the nation I am fucking my staff, you weren’t that big of a gay porn star and suggested I go on the radio show because I have a big mouth.”

Nick laughed, “Jason must be ripping him a new one. That is really funny. You better prepare a response.”

“I’ll just admit to fucking my ex no big scandal there. Maybe you should show me your porns so I know how to field those questions.”

“You can just say the truth that you never saw them.”

“But I want to see them.”

“Sooner or later they will surface. It is not like I keep copies of my porns on me. That would be weird and ridiculously narcissistic. We are leaving in an hour.”

Adam headed to the arena an hour later and was stopped by Paparazzi. He answered the questions honestly and with panache. He ran through sound check with his band and then dealt with interviewers for a couple hours. A half hour before the show, he went to the makeup area and was approached by a remorseful Kris.

“I am so sorry about what I said on the radio.”

Adam could hear the guilt in his voice but needed to hear him explain, “Why did you say it?”

“I was jealous. I can’t stand the thought of you touching another man and I was mad about Nick. I didn’t sleep before the interview and fucked up. If it is any consolation, I am in trouble for it.”

Adam was happy Kris admitted to being jealous and loved hearing him be possessive. Adam decided to cut him some slack explaining he had no reason to be jealous. He was not surprised to hear Brad had messed with Kris’ head. Adam decided to follow Nick’s advice and suggested they become friends before getting involved sexually. Even though, Adam wanted nothing more than to have sex with Kris all the time. Kris agreed and gave Adam the best hug of his life.

Adam performed his set and was greeted by Jason as he came off.

“Great set, Adam. Listen, I am not sure if you heard but Kris fucked up on an interview today and sort of dragged you through the mud. It is not in your interest to retaliate. I think Kris would be willing to publicly apologize.”

“Relax, Jason. I heard the interview and it’s not like I never fucked my staff before. It’s fine really. I already said I hired an ex as my PA. No one will care. I don’t intend to hurt Kris publicly or privately for that matter.”

“I am glad you are not upset but the label is furious. Rick is flying down for tomorrow’s show and I expect he will meet with us all. For a low key guy, Kris is becoming a bit of a wild card.”

Adam felt a surge of protection for Kris, “I think I just pushed his buttons and stressed him out. I think it was a one time screw up. It will blow over and like they say any publicity is good publicity. I am living proof of that.”

“And a nice guy to boot. Have fun tonight.” Adam shook Jason’s hand and went by his band. Monte and Tommy were joking and asked Adam when they had to fuck him to stay in the band. Adam hated his friends sometimes.

Kris finished his set and they were all taken straight back to the hotel. The next day Adam woke up late and Nick was already gone. There was a note explaining Adam was having lunch with Rick. Adam got done and went to the hotel restaurant. He saw Rick and Nick laughing at a table.

Adam joined them. Rick told Adam his album was about to go double platinum and once he finished these shows they would ramp up his exposure and release the next single. Rick also said he heard rumors Saturday Night Live was going to approach him either be a musical guest or possible a host. Adam was floored and hoped it was the latter.

“How are you doing with the tour? I spoke with Kris Allen earlier and warned him to watch his trash talk. In case you are worried, the label is very unhappy with Kris right now so at the moment you have more leverage and a lot more sales. If we need to step up and reign Kris in, we will.”

“No, Kris has been great. He was just tired and screwed up one interview. We are getting along fine.”

Rick narrowed his gaze, “I am not stupid. You better make sure you keep your lovers spats out of the media. Your boy needs to learn that. Adam you can have any man you want, why are you even wasting your time with Kris Allen. Shit, Nick here is bi and according to the internet he’s a hell of a lay.” Rick turned to Nick , “Oh yeah, your pornos are available online for ten bucks a piece.”

“I know. I signed an agreement for their re-release. I figured I may as well get a small cut if they were going to surface anyway,” Nick smiled.

Adam really admired Nick’s business sense and was looking forward to seeing the porns. Focus, Adam, focus.

“Kris and I have decided to keep our relationship platonic for a while so this kind of thing won’t happen again.”

“Good because Perez is chomping at the bit to out Kris. Now, do you need anything Adam? More staff, more clothes, anything? I am going to be working with Nick to line up some appearances and endorsements. We need to translate your fame into income.”

That sounded good to Adam. Nick laughed, “Did the label just realize they fucked up giving Adam only a two year contract?”

“Pretty much. So the message I was given was to keep Mr. Lambert happy and safe so the label is also going to spring for a bodyguard and a real PA.”

“Wow at this rate you might even get your own hotel room,” joked Nick.

Rick laughed, “If Adam wants his own floor I can make that happen too. You are this month’s golden boy, Adam”

Adam knew enough about the industry’s fickleness not to get over excited, “Well, I want to stay in their good graces for more than a month so I’ll keep my diva requests to a minimum. I’d just like to have a say in any new staff. I think Jake, Kris’ bodyguard, knows someone good and I don’t really need a PA with Nick around.”

Nick looked at Adam, “I offered to wipe your ass to avert drama but if the label is willing to give you a pro, take it. I need to get busy working with Rick on your media campaign and you are about to get a lot busier, cupcake.”

Adam smirked, “Are we really at the point you can call me cupcake?”


	27. Chapter 27

Precarious. Kris was near exhaustion by they time they arrived at the hotel. Jade gave him a mild sleeping pill and told him he had a meeting at ten. Kris passed out and was woken up by Jason at nine.

“Hey, Kris, here is some coffee. We have a meeting with Rick Lorry. He flew in on the red eye and I gather he is not happy. I have been scanning the internet and Adam’s fans have launched an anti-Kris campaign. I don’t think Adam is going to strike back in the media. At this point, he is still only a one hit wonder while you have several platinum albums. I think Rick is here just to make sure Adam stays in the box. Do you want to issue an apology?”

Kris hadn’t thought about it but responded after thinking it over briefly, “I don’t mind because I feel bad about saying it.”

“I think you should just stick with saying it was a bad joke and you meant nothing by it. Also, you think Adam is a cool guy blah, blah, blah. Play it off as not a big deal.”

“OK.”

“Kris, I don’t mean to pry but as your publicist I need to get a handle on your actions. Why did you say that shit?”

“Honestly?” Kris wanted to be more transparent and this was a good start, “I got jealous and thought Adam fucked Nick after I passed up an invite from him.”

“Alrighty then. Needless to say, media should not be used for passive aggressive maneuvers. OK, don’t tell Rick what motivated the comments.”

Kris wasn’t sure how the label would react but he hoped they weren’t going to punish Adam for his stupidity. Kris had a suite so he and Jason met with Rick in the living room. Rick looked annoyed.

“Kris, how is the tour going?”

“Fine.”

“Adam opened for you three times?”

Kris was glad Rick seemed calm, “Yeah, he was good.”

Rick’s expression changed, “How the fuck are you an expert in his employee relations after three fucking shows! You are not in a position to take cheap shots at Adam. He is on your tour because you have failed to sell out any venues before he came on and your album is tanking. I am sorry your marriage fell apart and God knows what went on with you and Lambert but you have to get your head out of your ass and start acting like your image. In case your forgot what that is, you are supposed to be a nice, straight, Christian boy that believes in helping people not some petty bitch.”

Kris and Jason’s jaws dropped. Jason recovered first, “Hey Man, that is uncalled for. Kris was tired and fucked up an interview. Don’t you think you are over-reacting?”

Rick seemed to hear Jason, “Maybe a little because I have had to defend Adam to the head executives for bullshit lies. They are worried about getting slapped with sexual harassment lawsuits. If Adam didn’t have a number one hit, he would have been screwed. I am being this harsh because I don’t want this escalating. You know Adam is one of the few openly gay performers out there and he is finally shedding the pervert stigma. Kris’ statement casted another dark shadow on him and he doesn’t deserve it.”

Kris felt like Rick was over-reacting but Kris could see his point, “I didn’t mean it to come out the way it did. I said it was a joke and I am prepared to issue an apology if people thought I was serious.”

Rick seemed to calm down, “I just don’t want you doing anything to aggravate the situation and for you to realize you can’t shit on people when your album isn’t selling too well. Jason, I want to meet with you and Nick later this afternoon and talk about some of the media events.”

Kris was not good with confrontations and had never been yelled at by anyone from the label before. He was shaken up and noticed Rick looking at him.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Are you going to be able to finish this tour on civil terms with Adam?”

“Of course. I think he is great on stage and a good guy.”

“Well, try saying that as opposed to talking about his sex life.”

Rick walked out. Jason looked at Kris,

“Let it roll off you. Rick is hot headed so he only meant part of what he said. Rick is also a closet gay so I think he either feels protective over Adam or is crushing on him. As for your album, its steady and hopefully the second single will hit.”

Kris felt two feet tall, “He’s right you know. I haven’t exactly acted like a nice guy in a long time.”

Jason patted him on the back and looked at him sympathetically which made Kris feel more pathetic. Kris walked Jason to the doo and said he was going to rest for a while. Kris decided to go back to bed for a few hours. He felt lost and confused. Who was the real Kris Allen? He had always identified with the married, down to earth, sweet boy next door. Now he was acting like a erratic, diva and chasing after his former masseur turned rockstar. He just laid there until he heard a knock at his door.

Kris knew his eyes were probably bloodshot from crying but he answered it anyway. Adam stood at his door looking fierce but then his expression immediately turn to concern.

“What’s wrong, Kris? Were you crying?”

Kris moved back since Adam was forcing himself in. Being caught hiding in his hotel room crying from being yelled at made it all that more humiliating. Adam immediately hugged Kris which made Kris break down again.

“I can’t believe I am being such a baby. I am sorry you are seeing this. ”

“Please, I am drama queen I cry all the time, no biggie but why are you crying?”

“I don’t even know.” Kris laughed between tears.

Kris was surprised Adam was not freaking out. Most people did not do tears and especially not tears from men. Although Kris’ family was not emotionally stifled, they were southern which meant you put on a happy face. Tears of joy were OK but not crazy emotional breaks downs and this was clearly the latter.   
Adam guided Kris back to his bedroom and laid down pulling Kris into him.

“This is a crappy shirt so you can cry on me and wipe your snot on it, whatever. I’ll just lay here and hold you. Then, when your ready you can tell me all about it because were friends.”

Kris was floored, “Aren’t you busy?”

“Nope. We have like four hours before sound check. Cry away.”

Kris let it out and cried for about ten minutes. Adam just rubbed his back and held him like he promised. Kris felt better.

“I feel lost like I don’t know who I am or where I am going. I am so confused about you and I feel bad because I keep hurting you with my inability to sort myself out. I don’t know if I am straight, gay or in denial. I spent my whole life living up to people’s expectations and not rocking the boat that I don’t even know how to be different. I want to be with you so bad but I am so scared of coming out especially if I end up not being gay. What if we don’t work out and I really only like women? Then everyone will thinkI am gay and I’ll always be alone.”

Adam laughed, “I don’t know as a gay man I still get a lot of offers from women. You can still probably get laid.”

Kris realized Adam was joking and bit Adam’s nipple as punishment since it was near his mouth.

“Ouch! I wish I could say I understand but I always knew I was gay. I am sorry if I was pushing you to be a certain way. That is my insecurities of rejection creeping up. We can go as slow as you need even if means stopping at friends.”

“You are so nice Adam and I keep hurting you. You deserve someone better in your life.”

“I have plenty of flaws. At the end of the day, my life is still a million times better having met you. Granted some of it has been in spite of you but in less than a year I have gone from being a failed actor slashed masseur to a rock-star slash failed masseur.”

Kris felt so relaxed in Adam’s arms and listening to his animated voice. Kris snuggled against Adam’s chest and mumbled, “You are a good masseur and an even better pillow.”

“Well, there you have it, gorgeous. I am an awesome pillow.” Adam kissed Kris’ head. Kris turned his head and found himself inches away from Adam’s lips. Unable to resist he pressed his lips against Adam’s and felt Adam’s lips part. Kris deepened the kiss and Adam responded passionately. Kris moved on top of Adam and kept kissing him while pressing his growing erection into Adam.

Adam pulled back, “Oh god, Kris, we shouldn’t. I fucking want you so bad…we can’t.”

Those were the last words, Kris wanted to hear. He needed Adam. Kris banked on Adam have little to no self control. Kris ran his hand over Adam’s crotch and pressed the heel of his hand against Adam’s erection. “I want you in me.”

“Fuck. Kris, you are killing me.” Adam got up and moved to the other side of the room. He was breathing heavy, “We can’t. You just had a fucking breakdown it is possible you are not thinking clearly. We agreed to just be friends for a while.”

Kris felt hurt, “Fine get out.”

“Kris, don’t do that. I’m frustrated too. I just don’t want you to regret it or stop liking me.”

Kris looked at a vulnerable Adam and relented, “I don’t think I can ever stop liking you. You’re more disciplined than I thought. Thank you for staying with me,” Kris smirked, “And thanks for the blue balls.”

Adam winked, “I can say the same.” Kris watched Adam depart and realized although he was frustrated he wasn’t sad anymore.

+++

Adam finished his lunch and was surprised how supportive the label was being of Adam and he wondered how Rick was to Kris. Adam had no idea why he felt like he had to champion Kris but that is how Adam got with boys he liked. He sure had bailed Brad’s ass out of enough situations as a result of his protective instincts. Of course, since meeting Kris Allen, Brad had certainly repaid him ten fold.

Adam went to Kris’ room and knocked on the door. He was surprised when an obviously distraught Kris answered. He immediately asked, “What’s wrong, Kris? Were you crying?” and entered Kris’ room.

Kris unsuccessfully tried to compose himself, “I can’t believe I am being such a baby. I am sorry you are seeing this. ”

Adam wanted to comfort Kris, “Please, I am drama queen I cry all the time, no biggie but why are you crying?”

“I don’t even know.”

Adam guided Kris back to his bedroom and laid down pulling Kris into him. He held Kris while he cried and then listened while he spoke. Adam realized maybe Kris was struggling with his sexuality because he truly just didn’t know. Adam had always known he was gay but maybe Kris was bisexual or bicurious. Adam wasn’t sure when things changed but suddenly Kris was kissing him and climbing on top of him. Adam was reacting and kissing him back but alarms were going off. This isn’t right and he is vulnerable. Do the right thing, Adam.

Adam pulled back, “Oh god, Kris, we shouldn’t. I fucking want you so bad…we can’t.”

“I want you in me.” Yes, brilliant, yes. Adam almost lost it hearing those words but instead jumped up and moved to the other side of the room. Adam tried to reason with Kris but Kris snapped at him. Adam took a deep breath and tried not to fan the fire,

“Kris, don’t do that. I’m frustrated too. I just don’t want you to regret it or stop liking me.”

Adam knew he added appropriately when Kris smiled, “I don’t think I can ever stop liking you. You’re more disciplined than I thought. Thank you for staying with me,” Kris smirked, “And thanks for the blue balls.”

Adam winked at Kris, “I can say the same.” Adam departed the room and collapsed against the door. He could not believe he had managed to walk out. Every fiber of his being wanted to completely ravage Kris and ignore his conscience but he had done it. For once, I used the right head.

Adam went back to his room jerked off to an awesome fantasy of what would have happened if he didn’t stop Kris and then showered. Nick returned to the room at five,

“Let’s go, you have sound check in a half hour.” Nick went in the bathroom to shower. Adam never one to pass up a cheap thrill, entered the bathroom a few minutes later to shave. He hesitated only a second before checking out Nick through the glass shower doors. If he minded he would have locked the door. Besides, people with good bodies should treat it like art and be on display. Obviously, one act of restraint did not make him a saint. Bad Adam.

Taking it one step further Adam commented, “Your welts are gone?”

“I am not sure why you are in here looking at my ass but stop it.”

Nick came out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist and walked over to Adam, “You need to hire a business manager or an entertainment lawyer, you accepted coming on tour for $2k per show?”

“Yeah, and there are like 20 shows in two months that’s like 15K per month. Pretty good, huh?”

“Hire them fast because they are even paying me more to be here. Let me see your contract so I can help you negotiate deals. It may be in your interest to sign short deals if management is taking a high percentage.”

“Do you think Rick screwed me over?”

“No, I think you got a decent contract as a nobody but you totally surpassed all expectation and they are going to make a lot of money on you. I think they will pass some on to you but this is the big leagues and you have look out for your interests. Don’t stress out about spilled milk but let’s try and capture some of your success for you.”

Adam looked at Nick, “Why are you helping me?”

“Because I love your idealism and innocence and I don’t want to see you get crushed. You need more jaded and cynical people around you. Brad was an ass but he was also naïve. Adam there are a lot of sharks out there and a lot of dark paths you need to keep good people around you.”

“Is Kris Allen good?”

Nick looked at Adam, “He is a good guy and I actually think he is a good influence on you because you need to learn to keep some things private. There is a reason that celebrities with successful relationships keep them out of the media. I am not saying go in the closet but you also don’t need to publicly court him either.”

“I can be discreet.”

Nick raised an eyebrow in disbelief which made them both laugh. “Sure you can, cupcake.”

“We are still not there yet, porn star.”

They went to the arena and went through sound check. Rick was hanging around talking to the bands, roadies and everyone else connected with the tour. Kris seemed low key but stable. Adam went by him before hitting the stage.

“How are you doing, beautiful?”

“Fine. I am going to refrain from breaking down or saying anything stupid.”

“Good strategy. My band and I are planning to go out after the show, you want to come?” Adam wanted to spend time with Kris in a platonic environment. This seemed like a good opportunity and hoped Kris would agree. Adam tried to provide incentive, “The quicker we become friends the quicker we can become more.”

Kris smiled, “If that is the case, count me in.” Adam smiled back and went on stage feeling elated.


	28. Chapter 28

Connection. After Kris finished his performance, there were limos waiting for them to take them to a VIP lounge in a club. The label was throwing them a small party. Kris got in the limo and Jason climbed in behind him.

“Kris, I don’t mean to sound like a jerk but maybe you should take it easy with the booze tonight. Rick is going to be watching you like a hawk and other label guys flew in on the afternoon flight to see the concert will also be coming out.”

Kris was annoyed, “Is Adam getting the same warning?”

“I don’t know I am not his publicist.”

“Nick is probably doing body shots off Adam instead,” Kris said bitterly.

Jason just shook his head, “I know it seems unfair that Adam gets to be this wild thing but that’s only because he has nothing to lose. He basically started out as this creepy, molester that stalked you. The only direction he could go was up. You can have fun just don’t get caught doing drugs or kissing Adam.”

They went into the club. Kris was joking around with Cale and his new drummer Pete. Kris noticed there were a lot of very beautiful woman there.

Cale smiled, “I heard there is some kind of adult film convention this weekend. Score.”

Pete laughed, “Maybe Nick will run into one of his costars.”

“From like twenty years ago? I doubt it. Anyway, this is where being a single rockstar pays off. Kris, if you don’t take this opportunity to get laid you will lose my respect forever. You at least need to be my wingman, this is where being Kris Allen means something.”

Screwing a female pornstar was pretty far from Kris mind but Cale did have a point. He and Adam were staying platonic so why not. He could at least flirt.

They were walking past a table with Adam, Nick, Rick, Jade and Monte, Adam’s guitarist. Kris felt Adam grab his wrist.

“Do you want to have a drink with us?” Adam asked in a hopeful tone.

Kris hated to disappoint him but he did not really want to sit with Rick and remembered Jason’s warning, “Yeah, I will come back over in a little bit.”

Adam seemed to hesitate a minute, “Ok, have fun.”

Kris went to the bar with Cale. A couple beautiful women came over. A really hot brunette turned her attention to Kris,

“You are Kris Allen, the hot pocket.”

Kris laughed, “Well I am Kris Allen.”

“I wanted to see you live but we had this convention.”

Cale pushed Kris and spoke to the girl, “Maybe you can have a private concert?”

“Really, that’s hot. Can Adam Lambert open the festivities.”

Cale grimaced, “He could but he doesn’t like girls.”

“Well, maybe he will like me.” The girl kissed Kris’ long and deep.

Kris kissed the girl back because she was so hot. She ran her tongue around Kris ear, “Introduce me to Adam and maybe we can all have fun.”

Kris felt a surge of anger and stared at the girl, “You want me to introduce you to Adam Lambert?”

The girl kissed him again, “Yeah because he is so sexy and wild. Are you wild too, Kris?” She ran her hand over his crotch.

Kris was getting turned on, “Adam likes boys.”

The girl moved between Kris’ legs and kissed his neck, “He’ll like me.” Kris looked over and saw Adam staring at them. The girl giggled when she noticed and motioned for Adam to come over. Kris watched Adam get up and walk toward them; the girl seemed to start freaking out which made Kris feel like chopped liver.

“Omigod, he’s so tall and beautiful.”

Adam came over, “You beckoned.”

The girl moved away from Kris and started acting star struck, “Er..Hi Adam…I am Venus. You are so gorgeous.” She hugged him and then grabbed his arm, “Dance with me.” She pulled Adam onto the dance floor. Did he just lose a hot chick to a gay man. New low.

Cale laughed and handed Kris a tequila shot, “Shake it off. This room is full of gorgeous, oversexed women.” Kris slammed the shot and watched the girl molest Adam on the dance floor. A few other girls joined them and soon Adam had a harem around him.

Cale looked at Kris, “That boy has his uses. Come on lets cut in on the action.” Cale pulled Kris on the dance floor by Adam and his group. A short pretty blonde girl with triple D boobs started grinding against Kris which was hot. Kris was near Adam and couldn’t help but notice Adam rolling his hips sensually to the music and directing lustful looks at Kris. Before he could react, another girl ran her hands down Kris’ crotch. Kris was not use to aggressive women. Most of his famous career he was married so he had a barrier. Even in his slutty phase, he went for mousy women. He certainly wasn’t accustomed to two pornstars practically having sex with him on a dance floor.

Kris tried to move a bit away from the girls and bumped up against Adam. Adam whispered in his ear,

“You are the sexiest thing on the dance floor.”

Adam ran his hand over Kris’ ass which caused an instant erection. The oblivious blonde assumed she was the reason for Kris’ attentiveness and started kissing him. Kris kissed her back and kept dancing. Kris pulled back after several minutes and noticed Adam had left the dance floor. One of the girls handed him a couple small paper cups and Kris found himself doing jello shots which did not bode well.

Kris kept dancing and letting the women fondle him. A crappy song came on and Kris was guided to some couches. Kris saw Adam standing a few feet away talking to Nick. Nick was on a couch with two women he had obviously been fooling around with. One still had her head in his lap while the other was kissing his neck. The girl kissing Nick’s neck tried to grab Adam’s hand but Adam stepped back out of her reach. Kris felt one of the girls unzipping his pants. He redirected his attention and stilled her hand. Kris did not like sex this casual. He noticed Cale was making out with some woman. Kris knew he should be elated since it was everyman’s fantasy to be surrounded by pornstars. Well not every man. Kris noticed Adam was now sitting at the bar alone drinking a martini.

The porned out version of Katy, was still rubbing his crotch and kissing his neck. Kris realized there was nothing he would rather be doing than sitting next to Adam at the bar. Kris stopped the girl’s hand,

“I’m sorry. I have to go talk to my friend. I had fun dancing.”

The girl looked surprised, “Well are you going to come back? I am not a tease, I want to fuck you.”

Kris blushed, “Er…I…I’ll come back in a bit.” Kris walked away quickly and went to the bar. He sat down next to Adam. Adam looked over at him and took a double take,

“Where’s your blonde friend?”

“I think she is on the couch waiting for me to come back.”

“She was pretty. Kris, it is cool. You like women go ahead and have fun.”

“Really? You want me to go back to her?” Kris was a little insulted that Adam didn’t seem to care if he was with a girl.

“I don’t want you to go there but I am trying to be mature and a supportive friend. Actually, I am incredibly jealous of her because I know she is probably your ultimate fantasy.”

Kris smiled, “You know a year ago you would have been right but for the last few months most of my fantasies featured a six foot, raven haired man.”

Kris watched Adam’s face light up and the biggest smile appeared on his face.

“In that case, do you want a drink?”

“I’d love one.” Kris settled in his stool feeling the more comfortable than he had been all night.

+++

Adam was looking forward to spending time with Kris after the concert so he was a little disappointed when Nick informed him that Rick arranged for some drinks for everyone at a club. Still, Kris would be there and this would be a good environment to just hang as friends. After Kris’ set they were herded into limos and taken to one of the few fancy dance clubs in New Mexico. They went into the VIP lounge which was already pretty full with scantily clad women. Adam appreciated beautiful women but this was not his idea of eye candy. Looking at all the men’s reactions, this was pretty much his worst nightmare. Rick laughed, “The adult film industry is doing a weekend event promoting up and coming porn stars. Can I throw a party or what?”

Adam winked at Nick, “Here’s your chance to get back into the industry.”

Nick laughed, “In a sense, I am looking to get …into a few. Too bad you are not a switch hitter looks like you will have slim picking while the rest of us enjoy a plentiful bounty.”

“For the first time, I miss Brad.”

Adam sat down at a table with Nick, Rick, Monte and Kris’ PA, Jade. Kris and his band came in. Adam grabbed Kris as he walked by hoping he would join them since they were supposed to hang out. Adam noticed Kris’ expression and could tell he was more interested in mingling. Adam was disappointed when Kris made a lame excuse and followed his guitarist to the bar. Nick pushed Adam,

“Adam, this is a room full of porn stars no straight or bisexual man is going to pass up the opportunity to talk to them. I wouldn’t take it personally.”

“I’m not. I just thought he might like to sit down.”

“At the lame table with two old guys, a girl and a gay man? Let him hang with his boys and do the Neanderthal thing tonight. You have a whole tour to hang out.”

Adam pouted, “I hate this club.”

“Make the best of it, cupcake.”

“I don’t think I am going to exercise any bicuriosity tonight.”

“Why? You can share another awkward encounter with a pro besides that chick with Kris is signaling you to go over.”

Adam would put up with a girl to be with Kris. Besides, maybe this was something friends did. Adam went over and the girl gushed over him and immediately pulled him away from Kris to dance. All well, at least dancing burned calories. Adam just started dancing and focusing on having a good time. More women came out and were totally molesting him. This is a friggin nightmare. No gay man should have to endure this. Yet another example of the shitty circumstances he find himself in on account of Kris. Adam felt a little better when Kris came out on the dance floor. Adam was watching him as a short, perky large chested, blonde started dancing with Kris. Based on Katy, Adam assumed this woman was probably exactly Kris’ type. Adam’s heart sank knowing he was going to have to watch Kris get the babe of his dreams.

Still, Kris was a cute dancer. Adam couldn’t resist running his hand down Kris’ ass and telling him how sexy he was. Adam thought he felt Kris respond but then the blonde bitch kissed Kris. Adam felt nauseous as he watched Kris kiss her back passionately. He had to get away before he puked. Adam just ran off the dance floor upset. He went by Nick who was sitting on the couch with two women. Adam again wished Brad was here to hang out with him and make him feel better. Adam was feeling alone as the one gay among all the heterosexuals and hoped Nick would channel his bisexual side.

Nick was literally alternating between kissing two women. He looked at Adam briefly and pulled one of the women’s heads into his lap while the other girl started kissing his neck.

“Is the building on fire?”

“I need to talk to you. I am upset.”

“Adam, I have a woman mouthing my balls and another willing to join her, you couldn’t possibly expect me to break away. You are in a bar get drunk.”

“Please.”

“No, Adam, deal with it. Now go away before you are ruin my erection.”

Adam was pissed and became even more aggravated when one of Nick’s babes tried to reach for him. Adam moved back and decided to take Nick’s advice and drown his miseries in alcohol. He went to the bar and ordered a triple martini which was the perfect cocktail for a pity party. Adam started recapping every low point in his life to enhance his sad mood. In between, thoughts of his lack of action in high school and Brad cheating on him, he noticed Kris sat next to him at the bar.

“Where’s your blonde friend?”

“I think she is on the couch waiting for me to come back.”

Adam wanted to show Kris he could be fun to hang out without being possessive, “She was pretty. Kris, it is cool. You like women go ahead and have fun.”

“Really? You want me to go back to her?”

As much as I want to jam this fancy toothpick into my eye, “I don’t want you to go to her but I am trying to be mature and a supportive friend. Actually, I am incredibly jealous of her because I know she is probably your ultimate fantasy.” Pathetic response, could he have sounded any more needy or insecure?

Kris smiled, “You know a year ago you would have been right but for the last few months most of my fantasies featured a six foot, raven haired man.”

I love this man. “In that case, do you want a drink?”

“I’d love one.” Kris seemed to relax back in his stool and Adam felt like the night was about to drastically improve. They started just talking about anything and everything. Adam was having a great time and loved joking around with Kris. Adam hoped this was a sign that Kris was starting to acknowledge he was at least a little gay.

“Considering you are surrounded by hot women and sitting at a bar with me, maybe you are finding men more attractive now?”

Kris looked at Adam and shook his head, “Adam, I don’t think I am gay. Seeing these women scantily clad is turning me on a lot and I love the way women smell and taste. They make me a little nervous but I am definitely attracted to them.”

Ouch, that hurt more than he thought it would. Why didn’t he keep his big mouth shut? “You probably aren’t gay then. Maybe you are just a people pleaser and I came on really strong.”

Kris looked at Adam and then laughed hysterically, “You think I sucked your cock because I am a people pleaser?”

Adam was back at his pity party, “Maybe. Stop laughing at me.”

“I am sorry. I know two things. I like women and I like Adam Lambert. Maybe you were a girl in another life and we were married.”

Adam made a face, “Honey, I think you would have been the girl. Maybe I was the guy that took your cherry.”

“Maybe you will be that guy again.” Adam choked on his drink. The night was getting better and better. Unfortunately, Adam’s good fortune turned to dust as he watched the busty blonde from earlier approach. Adam didn’t want to lose Kris to her. Adam placed his hand on Kris thigh,

“So how long do you think I have to wait? Maybe we can tell each other secrets to speed up the friendship.”

Kris smiled, “You go first.”

Before Adam could answer the blonde came up to Kris and put her arms around him, “I got lonely waiting for you.” She climbed on Kris lap simultaneously knocking Adam’s hand away. She turned to Adam, “Hi Adam, I’m Sherri, I hope you don’t mind me borrowing Kris, you know there is a gay bar down the block.”

Bitch. “Thanks for the tip but I was having a good time here.”

She smiled, “Good for you. Why don’t you go dance with my friends so I can put the moves on Kris.”

Adam was pissed off and drunk enough to be an asshole, “Well take a number because I was here first.”

“Sweetie, Kris isn’t gay.” She turned to Kris, “You aren’t gay, are you?”

Shit, he is never going to admit to that. Adam just turned toward the bar and took a big gulp of his drink. He heard Kris responding,

“Sherri, Adam and I have some things to talk over.”

Yeah, he wants to be with me. Sherri placed her hand on Kris’ cock and started whispering in his ear. Adam was pissed especially when Kris didn’t push her away. Adam looked around and saw most of the guys had paired off with some girls, even Rick seemed to have found himself a babe. Nick was on the dance floor and had lost his shirt somewhere along the way. Adam wondered if exotic dancing had been among those former career choices.

Adam looked over and saw the girl was still rubbing Kris’ crotch, “Maybe I will go dance.”

Kris looked over at the dance floor and grimaced, “To go grind against Nick?”

Adam looked at Kris, “Why should you be the only one getting a cock rub?”

Adam froze with shock when Kris’ hand landed on Adam’s crotch, “I don’t have to be the only one.”

Kris’ new friend did not seem as adventurous because she turned to Kris in shock, “You are a fucking FAG!” She stood up knocking over some drinks and drawing attention to them. She slapped Kris across the face, “I offer myself to you and you respond by touching his dick! I may be a pornstar and like it wild but I am not into the fag hag thing. You are a real disappointment, Kris Allen. Go fuck your boy here, homo.” The girl walked off.

Kris looked pale. Adam went to comfort him but Kris recoiled from his touch, “Don’t. You are going to make it worse.”

Adam felt bad for Kris but resented Kris for acting like he did this. Jason came over immediately and pulled Kris away from Adam and guided him to a private table. Adam saw Nick was still on the dance floor looking like a Chippendales dancer. Adam downed the rest of his martini and went on the dance floor by Nick who was sandwiched between two girls, one of which was also topless. Nick smiled at Adam and whispered, “Doing OK, cupcake?”

“Not really. Kris just made a scene and hates me.”

Adam needed to be comforted and have someone make him forget his pain. Adam could smell the musky scent emanating from Nick’s and he could see the beads of sweat across his chiseled muscles. Adam couldn’t resist the urge and pulled Nick into him and started dancing with him. Nick laughed and turned around started shaking his ass against Adam’s crotch and threw his head back joking,

“I am going to go with this because I already got a blowjob and frankly I am drunk.” Good enough. Nick was an incredible dancer and Adam put Kris out of his mind and started focusing on the hotness that was Nick. Adam could not believe Nick was letting Adam touch him and Adam was taking full advantage. The universe conspired against Adam and started playing a lame tune. Nick smiled, “Even I can’t dance to this crap. Let’s go see if its time to go.”

Adam followed Nick toward their groups and sat down by Rick, Jade and Monte. Kris came over furious,

“So now you are going to go fuck your PA? You are a fucking slut, Adam Lambert, I can’t believe I was willing to risk my career to fuck someone who doesn’t even discriminate. I am not sure why I am surprised considering Brad.”

Adam became furious and just walked out of the lounge and out of the club. He took a deep breath trying to control his anger. A moment later Kris came out and walked over by Adam.

Adam looked at Kris, “Go back into the club, Kris. I can’t deal with this shit tonight.”

Kris didn’t seem to have control of himself, “So instead you are just going to fuck your personal pornstar? Is that what you are gonna do, Adam!” Kris pushed Adam as more people came out of the club.

Rick moved between them and put a hand up to stop Adam, “Kris, are you on drugs?”

Jake and Jason came over. Rick turned to Jake, “Kris needs to go home right now.”

Kris was red with anger, “I want this slut off my tour.”

Adam was about to belt him but Nick stepped in front and grabbed him. Adam tried to struggle but Nick was too strong. Nick whispered in his ear, “You are being videotaped. Just relax.” Adam became aware of the paparazzi. Kris was roughly shoved into a limo by Jake with Jason and Rick climbing in behind.

Adam felt sick. How did the night spiral down so fast? Nick backed up and kept his arm around Adam for support. The paparazzi were bombarding them with questions thwy ignored. Nick hailed a cab and climbed in behind Adam. Adam leaned against Nick and felt his emotions overtake him. Adam tried to hold back the tears. Nick kissed him on the head, “Don’t worry, cupcake, we will sort this out. Kris was just drunk and jealous.”


	29. Chapter 29

Meltdown. Kris was having a great time sitting with Adam at the bar. Even though there was an undercurrent of sexual tension, Kris felt more comfortable with Adam than he did with people he had known for years. Kris couldn’t resist flirting with Adam insinuating he could be Kris’ first man. Adam responded by placing his hand on Kris thigh which sent electrical shocks up his thigh. Adam seemed to want Kris as bad as he wanted him and inquired,

“So how long do you think I have to wait? Maybe we can tell each other secrets to speed up the friendship.”

It was amazing how Adam could be so sexy and then be childlike. Kris smiled, “You go first.”

As Kris waited for Adam to answer, Kris felt someone’s arms come around him,

“I got lonely waiting for you.” Kris was surprised as she climbed on his lap. Kris felt bad that she had just callously knock Adam’s hand off his lap. Kris cringed when he heard her next comment.

“Hi Adam, I’m Sherri, I hope you don’t mind me borrowing Kris, you know there is a gay bar down the block.”

Kris noticed Adam sat up straighter, more defensively, “Thanks for the tip but I was having a good time here.”

“Good for you. Why don’t you go dance with my friends so I can put the moves on Kris.”

Kris blushed at her words. Adam was not so amused, “Well take a number because I was here first.” Shit.

“Sweetie, Kris isn’t gay.” She turned to Kris, “You aren’t gay, are you?”

Kris froze. He wasn’t gay and he certainly was not going to admit it to a porn star. Still, he did not want to leave Adam hanging. He wanted to be with Adam not her. Kris tried to dodge the bullet,

“Sherri, Adam and I have some things to talk over.”

The message obviously missed its target because Sherri placed her hand on Kris’ cock and started whispering in his ear.

“Kris, I really want to be with you. I can make you feel great. We can go back to your hotel.”

Kris heard Adam speak to him, “Maybe I will go dance.”

Kris looked over at the dance floor and saw Nick dancing topless and looking like some Greek god. No fucking way was he letting Adam go out there. He knew he was being petty, “To go grind against Nick?”

Adam looked at Kris, “Why should you be the only one getting a cock rub?”

Kris was drunk, feeling good and wanting to make Adam stay. Maybe he could have his cake and eat it too. Kris put his hand on Adam’s crotch and in a louder than he intended voice stated, “I don’t have to be the only one.”

Apparently Sherri was not on board with Kris’ plan. Kris watched her turn around furious, “You are a fucking FAG!” Sherri stood up knocking over some drinks and drawing attention to them. Kris was starting to reel until she slapped him across the face,

“I offer myself to you and you respond by touching his dick! I may be a pornstar and like it wild but I am not into the fag hag thing. You are a real disappointment, Kris Allen. Go fuck your boy here, homo.”

Sherri walked away leaving Kris to look around at all the staring faces. Kris felt the nausea rising. Kris recoiled when Adam tried to touch him fearing everyone would know he had just tried to initiate a threesome. Nastier than he intended he snapped at Adam, “Don’t. You are going to make it worse.”

Before Adam could respond, Jason pulled Kris away and toward a private table.

“Dude, what are you doing? Didn’t I say not to make a scene. Kris, was I seeing things or did you just put your hand on Adam’s cock in a club? That girl is going to try and get attention by telling anyone and everyone how you molested Adam Lambert. You need to chill out. Are you drunk?”

Even though Kris was plastered he decided to proclaim innocence, “I’m not drunk. Look, she over reacted. It wasn’t that bad.”

“It drew a lot of attention and she yelled pretty loud. Ok, I am going to tell Jake to get the car.”

Jason left and Kris looked around for Adam. Sure enough Adam was on the dance floor and was all over Nick. Kris felt his blood boil as Nick was shaking his ass right against Adam’s dick. Nick obviously decided Adam was off the forbidden list and ready to further their relationship. Kris tried to control himself as he watched them walk off the dance floor. Kris noticed Nick was holding Adam’s hand and saw red, before he knew it he was standing in front of Adam screaming,

“So now you are going to go fuck your PA? You are a fucking slut, Adam Lambert, I can’t believe I was willing to risk my career to fuck someone who doesn’t even discriminate. I am not sure why I am surprised considering Brad.”

Adam’s face contorted into an angry expression and he just walked out of the lounge. Kris looked around at the shocked expressions on Jade, Monte and Rick. Kris just turned and followed Adam out. He caught up with him outside the club and went right in front of his face.

Adam spoke first, “Go back into the club, Kris. I can’t deal with this shit tonight.”

Kris was still caught up in the moment, “So instead you are just going to fuck your personal pornstar? Is that what you are gonna do, Adam!” Kris was frustrated, hurt and angry. He pushed Adam hoping to get his attention and suddenly Rick was in his face questioning him,

“Kris, are you on drugs?”

Kris noticed Jake and Jason had come outside. Rick turned to Jake, “Kris needs to go home right now.”

Kris looked over by Adam and saw Nick standing close to him like his lover. Kris turned to Rick and screamed, “I want this slut off my tour.”

Kris saw Nick grab hold of Adam and whisper something in his ear. Kris wanted to rip Nick apart but suddenly he was pushed into a vehicle by Jake. Jason and Rick climbing in behind and they sped off.   
They were all staring at Kris. Jason spoke,

“Did you take something tonight? Are you OK?”

Jake responded, “Maybe someone put something in his drink.”

Rick shook his head, “He needs a fucking babysitter. Gina, at least kept him in line.”

Kris wanted to defend himself but he was too busy concentrating on not passing out. Kris felt like he was in a tunnel as he listening to Jake and Jason telling Rick they would keep a closer eye on Kris. Kris barely remembered being taking to his room.

He woke up the next day with a pounding headache and spent the first hour puking. He was trying to remember the night before. He remembered sitting at the bar with Adam and then a pretty blonde girl sitting on his lap after that it became hazy. Kris felt a little more human by eleven. He was surprised everyone had let him sleep that long. Kris heard voices in the living room area of his suite.

“I think we should cancel the rest of the tour. Get Kris into rehab and then start again with a different opening act.” Kris recognized the speaker as Jason.

“The shows are sold out and I doubt if he cancels now people will buy tickets again especially if Adam is not in the show. He needs to finish the tour. Let them stay in separate hotels and I will send a therapist to help him with his substance abuse issues.” Kris felt his heart racing at Rick’s words. How bad did he behave?

Kris heard Nick respond, “I think you all are over-reacting. Kris got drunk and aired some dirty laundry in public. I am sure he and Adam will make up. I think he is a dumb drunk but I am not sure he has a ‘problem’. He wasn’t caught on tape fondling Adam and you can say he just doesn’t agree with Adam’s lifestyle.”

“Nick, he physically assaulted Adam and then screamed he wants this slut off his tour in front of TMZ. There is no way I can spin this in a positive light. I am surprised you are not pissed about being plastered all over the tabloids as Adam’s latest squeeze.” Oh god, I called Adam a slut. Memories started bombarding Kris mind and Kris wanted to crawl into a hole.

He heard Nick laugh, “Most of the comments about me were pretty complimentary. At thirty seven, I’ll take being called hot and a nice piece of ass.”

“No one is going to take you seriously as a publicist when you are fucking your client. In fact, I doubt you would get hired again.”

“Jason, no one ever takes me that seriously and it is not that serious. Besides, I have been entertaining the idea of a career change. Anyway, let’s focus on the business at hand.”

Kris came out trying to keep his head up although he felt bad. Jason looked at him uneasily, Rick had a disgusted expression, and Nick just smiled. Nick spoke first,

“How are you feeling, killer? Kind of a rough night.”

Kris just sat down hugging his knees into his chest, “To tell you the truth, I don’t remember much of it but it sounds like I really screwed up.”

Rick turned a laptop toward him and hit play. Kris watched in horror as he saw a videotape of him pushing Adam and screaming to Rick that he wanted that slut off the tour. It looked like a vicious lovers spat and at best he looked like a prick. Kris felt horrible saying something so nasty about Adam. Kris looked at everyone,

“Is there more?”

“Not on video. There are several accounts of you hitting on Adam and trying to initiate a threesome with a pornstar. Another account says you and Adam were all over each other in the club and then Adam dumped you for his hot publicist. Another one said that one of the conditions for Adam touring with you was that he sleep with you and you got mad when he strayed. Perez focused on Adam’s ‘trade up’ and apparently hopes Adam and Nick make a video.”

Kris wanted the world to swallow him up. “Maybe I should come clean?”

Rick shook his head, “How are you going to come clean? You are going to admit to being gay and fucking Adam over? Are you going to admit your album which is plastered with love songs about women and family values is a fraud? Your fans will hate you and the gay community is going to think you are a pathetic closet case fucking with their savior. No, Kris you are not about to become an open book because frankly you are a fuck-up.”

Kris looked at Nick for support. Nick looked at Kris sympathetically, “I don’t think you should come out directly since you really aren’t gay and people won’t understand. I think you should stay silent about your feelings for Adam and leave people guessing. You already played the ‘I am giving up booze’ card and if you do it again you will look like a pathetic alcoholic. I think you should just lay low and let this wash over.”

Jason shook his head, “I don’t know. Nick, you are not exactly unbiased and have Adam’s interest at heart.”

“Their interests are not so different. I think we should let the dust settle before doing anything.”

Rick jumped in, “Nick, tell Adam not to discuss the incident with the media even though I am sure he wants to get back at Kris.”

Nick looked at Kris, “Adam doesn’t want to hurt Kris. Despite this incident, I am sure they will work out their differences. Lets put this in perspective compared to Kris letting Adam get arrested, this is a bump in the road.” Kris cringed at Nick’s statement but noticed Nick was still smiling.

“This might affect Adam getting sponsors not to mention Kris will probably lose a few. Nick this is a lot more serious than you imagine.”

Nick stood up unconvinced, “We’ll see. I have to go get Adam packed since we are leaving at four. Rick, if you are done reading Kris the riot act, come with me so we can discuss Adam getting a new PA.” Nick winked at Kris and left with Rick. Kris was eternally grateful that he wouldn’t have to listen to another tirade from Rick. Kris just sat down and put his head in his hands. Jason patted him on the back,

“We’ll try and fix this but Kris you have to clean up. No more drinking when you are out. Lay low for now. I will send Jade up to help you pack.” Jason left and Kris just collapsed on the couch. He felt like he was losing it. He heard a knock on the door and wondered who was going to lecture him now. He opened the door and stared into beautiful blue eyes.

“Adam? I am so sorry for what I said and did.” Seeing beautiful!Adam at his door made him more regretful than any amount of yelling or ridicule he anticipated. To be so close, yet so far.

“Can I come in?”

“God, yes. Please come in. I can’t believe you are here. I don’t even care if it is just to beat the shit out of me.”

Adam laughed, “Really? Is that permission to spank you?” Kris was confused by Adam’s lack of anger so did not even know what to say.

“I’ll take your silence as a no. Look, I am sorry if I made you jealous nothing happened between me and Nick. He is a good looking guy but he’s not you.” Kris felt his heart stop as Adam leaned in and kissed Kris gently. Kris kissed him back unsure why Adam was forgiving him but far too happy to look a gift horse in the mouth.

+++

Adam and Nick arrived at the hotel. Adam was exhausted from a traumatic and dramatic night. Nick was on his cell obviously talking with Jason. Adam just washed up, stripped down and crawled into bed. Nick told him he could sleep in. Adam was grateful for small gifts and closed his eyes and fell into a deep slumber. Adam woke up feeling better. He heard Nick come into the room.

“How you feeling, cupcake?”

“Good enough to be annoyed at that endearment. Can’t you call me something sexier?”

“Nah, that one fits. You need to go check on Kris.”

Adam sat up, “Are you nuts? He tried to kick me off the tour and called me a slut. I am not talking to that asshole until he gets on his knees and apologizes.”

“OK, but I hope you are willing to give him up forever. He is facing some pretty serious shit today and right now he is freaking out that you slept with me and hate him.”

Adam was still too mad, “No way he’s manic. Every time I think we are going to get together he freaks out. I can’t be with someone who doesn’t even know who he is and wants to hide in a closet. Let him sort himself out first.”

Nick banged a fist into the dresser, “You are an insensitive bastard. For someone who pretends to be enlightened you are really dense. You come from a liberal family and knew all your life you were different. You have plenty of gay friends and hung around a gay friendly theater environment. No offense but it is very easy and natural for you to be gay. Kris comes from a traditional family, built his life around being heterosexual and has never even thought about being with a man before. He meets you and suddenly his life is turned upside down. He is trying to figure himself out and how to be with you yet every time he turns around you are trying to fuck me or Brad. Add on the pressure from the media, the label, hetero friends, and all this other bullshit. I am shocked the guy hasn’t totally blown a gasket. If you care about him, go to him before he has a meltdown.”

Adam kissed Nick on the cheek and headed down the hall to Kris’ room. After listening at the door for a moment and hearing silence, he knocked. Adam’s heart skipped a beat when Kris opened the door and stood before him.

“Adam? I am so sorry for what I said and did.”

“Can I come in?”

Kris seemed to relax, “God, yes. Please come in. I can’t believe you are here. I don’t even care if it is just to beat the shit out of me.”

Adam laughed, “Really? Is that permission to spank you?” Adam’s anger from the night before had melted after looking into Kris beautiful brown eyes. As usual the only thing Adam felt was attraction and elation. Kris seemed to be contemplating his words so Adam pressed on,

“I’ll take your silence as a no. Look, I am sorry if I made you jealous nothing happened between me and Nick. He is a good looking guy but he’s not you.” Adam could not fight the draw any longer and leaned in pressing his lips against Kris. Feeling Kris lips part, Adam deepened the kiss. Adam could feel Kris kissing him back with desperation and need. After a few moments they broke apart and simply stared at one another. Adam grabbed both Kris’ hands and broke the silence,

“I haven’t even seen the internet. How bad is it?”

Kris looked down, “It is pretty bad. People think I am either a jealous lover, massive homophobe or a pathetic drunk. I look like a spoiled child in the video. I didn’t mean it Adam. I wouldn’t even blame you if you did choose Nick over me. I am so sor-“

“Kris, I should be apologizing to you. I have been pushing you to be something maybe you are not. I have been gay for so long I forgot how scary feeling different can be. I think you are brave for even investigating these feeling for me.”

Kris gave a self-deprecating laugh, “Brave? When? When I through you into the paparazzi claiming you molested me, when I let you get arrested in my house? When I couldn’t even stop my friends from attacking you? Or was it when I accused you of sexually harassing your staff?”

Adam couldn’t control himself and started laughing hysterically, “I knew eventually it would be funny. Put all that shit aside for now, what do you want? Do you want to pursue this thing between us? I still want you.” Adam could feel his heart beating fast as he waited for Kris to either break his heart or make his day.

“It seems like every time we try something bad happens. I think when people get involved they should make each other better and to be honest I don’t like the person I am with you. How can you even like me?”

“I don’t think a lot of the things that happened were all your fault. The person I am crazy about is the sexy, funny guy that I can talk to for hours. It is the guy that makes my heart race whenever he looks at me like I am the most beautiful person on the planet. It is the guy that is willing to sacrifice his own happiness because he feels bad for hurting me. Kris, we just aren’t getting any breaks. But, I’d rather deal with the bullshit with you than the emptiness without you.”

Kris looked at Adam and then broke into a smile, “Me too. Can we skip the ‘just friends’ part?”

“Fuck yeah.” Adam kissed him and pushed him up against the wall. “I know you are really upset but an orgasm always makes the world seem rosier. Let me take care of you.”

Kris moaned something unintelligible that Adam decided to interpret as a yes. Adam went on his knees and slowly opened Kris’ pants. This was going to be the best blowjob ever. I am going to make sure it is so good he never considers giving me up. Adam began by slowly licking circles around the head of Kris’ cock and wrapping a hand around the base to harden him. Kris moaned and Adam took the full length of Kris into his mouth. Adam could feel the pleasure running through Kris body. As always, Kris’ body reacted positively to Adam’s efforts and he was quickly caught up in the throes of passion. Adam placed a moist finger around Kris’ entrance and felt Kris open his legs invitingly. Adam placed a finger in him probing for his prostate. Score. He felt Kris thrust into him harder and start just rambling gibberish interspersed with “Adam…more…so good…”

Adam felt Kris tense and felt hot liquid hitting the back of his throat. Suddenly Adam felt Kris push into him which caused Adam to gag. Adam immediately choked and spewed cum allover Kris and himself. He started coughing and finally heard Nick asking if he was OK. Mortifying. This was by far the most humiliating day of his life. Adam tried to get control of his coughing because getting medical attention for a bumbled blowjob would be the end of his “Sexgod” reputation. Adam saw Kris was completely crimson closing his pants and then saw Jade standing at the other end of the room shocked and appalled. Is there any way this could be worse? Adam had his answer when he looked up at a smirking Nick,

“For a gay man, you are not very good at that. Good thing you don’t have a concert tonight. Why don’t you two clean up and take this to our room so Jade can pack Kris up. Maybe you two should stick to the basics so no one gets hurt.”


	30. Chapter 30

Mortification. Kris barely heard Nick’s words as he quickly pulled up his pants and attempted to not hyperventilate from getting caught in the act. Kris looked over at Jade and watched as she quickly averted her eyes. Hoping for some reassurance he turned to Adam who seemed as embarrassed as Kris which heightened his anxiety. Adam seemed too flustered to reply to Nick. Kris felt Adam grab his hand and pull him out of the room. Adam pulled him down the hall and into his room and commenced to freak out which turned Kris’ fear to outright terror.

“Oh god, Kris, I have never gagged like that before. I can’t believe I did that in front of an audience. This is the worse day of my life.”

Adam’s words sunk in. Is he freaking out for getting caught or just giving a bad blowjob? What the fuck? “Adam, are you worried they will tell the label about us and ruin our career or simply laugh at you?”

Kris searched Adam’s face for a response and noticed he seemed to be reeling in his own world and then mumbled, “My whole image is based on my sexual prowess. I am the master of pleasure. This could ruin me. A gay man that can’t give a blowjob is like a lifeguard that can’t swim. I want to die. Not too mention it was Nick. A fucking pornstar. I want to die. You pushed into me too hard. You are not supposed to shove your cock like that when you come.”

Kris was furious that Adam seemed only concerned with his sexual ego and even madder that he was blaming him, ““Excuse my novice technique. I think you are missing the bigger picture. How about the fact that we were seen having sex together?”

“Big fucking deal, everybody suspected that already. However, I doubt anyone thought I could screw up a blowjob. I want to die.”

Kris wasn’t sure if Adam had gone off the deep end, “Adam, I doubt anyone even thought about it. Are you masking your fears by focusing on something so stupid?”

“Don’t call me stupid, Kris. I am really upset and humiliated. How about a little compassion here?”

Kris just stared at Adam blankly. Adam took out his cell and hit a speed dial number. Kris was confused, “Who are you calling?”

“I gotta talk to Brad.”

Without even thinking, Kris grabbed his cell phone and threw it across the room. Adam watched his phone smash against the wall and looked at Kris like he was going to murder him. Kris became scared and started backing away from an irate Adam, “Calm down. I’m sorry.”

Adam grabbed Kris by the collar and threw him against the wall, “That was my fucking phone. Why did you do that!”

“Let go of me. Why are you calling Brad when I am right here? Talk to me.”

“I tried and you don’t get it. Brad would understand. You don’t and you called me stupid.”

Kris felt like Adam just slapped him across the face. “Fine, I’ll leave. Here take my cell phone so you can call your ex-boyfriend and lament about embarrassing yourself in front of the other guy you want to fuck. You know I was embarrassed too and I also have that little career ending video hanging over my head. Sorry, I couldn’t appreciate your life threatening trauma of screwing up a blow job.” Kris threw his cell at Adam and walked out. He heard Adam yell after him, “What is your obsession with chucking cell phones?”

Kris stood outside the Adam’s door and just collapsed down against the door. Why did things always escalate between them? Kris threw his head back against the door just as Adam opened it. The sudden opening caused Kris to fall inside the room rather ungracefully.

“Kris, are you OK?” Adam reached down and pulled Kris up and back into his room, “I am sorry about trying to call Brad. I was just really upset and he is usually the person I go to for support. He is a good friend and he knows me better than anyone else.”

Kris felt himself about to launch into TMI mode but spoke anyway, “I want to be the one that knows you and I want be the friend you go to for support.”

Kris looked away from Adam not wanting to see his response to such a pathetic plea. Kris felt Adam pull him onto the bed so they were laying across from each other again, “I want that too but then you have to at least pretend to understand.”

Kris looked into Adam’s beautiful eyes, “Ok, I am so sorry you were caught screwing up a blowjob. I am sure Nick noticed I pushed into you. Maybe we can call Nick back in here and you can give me another blowjob in front of him to show him how good you are. Would that make you feel better?” Kris knew he was pushing his luck being sarcastic.

Kris was relieved when Adam laughed, “Shut up, you are just patronizing me. Dude, you broke my phone.”

“How about I make it up to you? I will buy you a new one and I’ll give you a massage.”

“With a happy ending?”

“Absolutely. Are we good?”

Adam looked at Kris and laughed, “After everything I put up with from the last year, do you really think breaking my cell phone would be the deal breaker? Honestly, I am not even sure you will be able to get rid of me. In case you haven’t heard I’ve been known to stalk people.”

Kris laughed and kissed Adam short on the lips, “I don’t think I ever want to get rid of you.”

Adam smiled and just hugged him. There was a knock at the door and Nick came in.

“Sorry guys, I just have to get us packed. They want to load the bags now.” Kris tried to sit up but Adam just held him there. Kris felt a little uncomfortable about it but part of him wanted to make sure Nick knew they were together and Adam was his. Kris heard Adam speak,

“Leave me my black jeans and Queen t-shirt.” Adam continued to rub his hands up and down Kris’ back but continued hesitantly, “Listen, about what you saw earlier, you know I usually don’t gag, right?”

Nick laughed, “Don’t give it a second thought, cupcake, some people are better at other things. Maybe you can buy my video and see how it is supposed to be done.” Nick winked and just threw two suitcases on the other bed.

Kris wished he could just lay with Adam all day but that wasn’t an option. Kris looked over at the clock and saw it was almost three. He went to get up but Adam tugged him back and kissed him long. Kris pulled back self-consciously and glanced over at Nick before turning to Adam,

“I better go help Jade. I’d like to shower and change before we get on the bus.”

Adam reluctantly let Kris up. Kris went back to his room and found Jade and Jason staring at an envelope. Kris was still embarrassed and decided to just address it,

“Sorry about earlier, Jade. I hope it didn’t ruin our relationship.” Kris could tell they both looked upset which made Kris continue to stutter, “I did-didn’t know you would come in-“

Jade looked over, “Kris, you are getting blackmailed.”

“By you?”

Jade shook her head. Jason responded, “No, Gina Falco, your former publicist is back. I guess when you fired her you didn’t have her sign and any gag orders. She is threatening to sell you out to the enquirer unless you pay her 2.5 million.”

“Bitch. I don’t have 2.5 million, my album is tanking. She has no proof of anything.”

“No, but it is easy to make the truth sound plausible since most of your lies were silly at best.”

Kris felt dizzy. Couldn’t he get through one scandal before the next one came? Kris started hyperventilating.

+++

Although Adam was humiliated by the blowjob and pissed about Kris smashing his phone, he was mostly happy that Kris was into him. It scared Adam how is own moods were becoming so dependent on Kris’ disposition toward him. It probably was incredibly self-destructive but he seemed to be all about that lately. With Kris having gone back to his room to shower, Adam felt the need to fix his image with Nick,

“Seriously, Nick I can give a great blowjob and deep throat with the best of them.”

Nick looked over, “Whatever, cupcake. What do you care what I think? I am your publicist not your next conquest. Don’t worry, I would never hurt your image by exposing you unless of course you hire Brad back as your PA.”

“I hate people thinking something about me that is not true.”

“You should be used to that by now. It didn’t seem to bother you that much when people thought you were a pervert.”

“Well, that wasn’t as bad. So aren’t you going to offer me advice about Kris?”

Nick finished backing the suitcases, “You looked like you were handling it fine. As a matter of fact, you looked like you had him eating out of your hands.”

An hour later they headed to the buses. Adam noticed Kris looked upset but didn’t get a chance to speak to him. A few hours later, the buses stopped for dinner. Adam went by Kris,

“Everything OK?”

“Yeah, sit with me for dinner.” Adam was happy to sit by Kris. Yhey laughed and chatted all through the meal. Adam really enjoyed Kris’ company and they could talk about music endlessly. They headed back to the buses and Kris grabbed Adam’s hand,

“Come on my bus so we can finish talking about soundtracks.”

Adam was a little apprehensive about going on Kris’ bus but he didn’t want to turn the invite down. As they were boarding Adam noticed Jake and Jason get on his bus. He started getting really nervous and could practically hear Brad screaming at him to run. Adam climbed aboard the bus and felt like everyone got quiet and stared. Maybe he was being paranoid but he wished he was on his own bus. Kris led him to the back. Adam tried to smile at Kris’ band even though he knew they hated him. Kris’ guitarist called out,

“Hey Adam, coming to see how the other half live?”

“Yeah, I came to take a turn in the aquamassager.”

Cale laughed and then just started watching a movie with Jade. Adam followed Kris to the back of the bus and continued talking about their pasts. Act appropriate Adam and keep hands to yourself. Adam loved hanging out with Kris but it was hard not touching him. In an attempt to keep his libido in check, he thought about dead grandmas and being stuck in a club with aggressive female pornstars. Once he had killed any potential erection, he noticed Kris speaking to him,

“-being blackmailed. That is probably why Jason and Jake went on your bus.”

“What?”

Kris was obviously shaking up, “Gina is blackmailing me for 2.5 million dollars. She is threatening to go to the media and tell all my secrets to the enquirer.”

Adam shrugged, “Other than me, you don’t have too many good ones. I wouldn’t pay her that much money.”

They got to the hotel. Adam and Kris sat together in the lobby waiting for their rooms. Nick came over and handed Adam a room key and his cell phone,

“Call Brad. He is pissed you have been ignoring him and wants to know what you are willing to do to prevent him from accepting a hundred thousand dollars to spill all about you and Kris.”

Adam could sense Kris starting to have an anxiety attack, “Kris, calm down, Brad would never do that. He just likes to use this to get things.”

“A hundred grand is a lot of money.”

“Brad, has no money sense. His family has millions and he gets a healthy allowance. Besides, other than nice clothes, Brad doesn’t care about material things. I might be able to offer up, Nick.”

Kris laughed, “You think Nick would be willing to jump on that grenade?”

Adam shrugged, “He is my publicist, he should, right?”

They both laughed despite the tension. Adam didn’t want to call Brad in front of Kris in case he had to do some serious groveling. They were assigned rooms and Adam told Kris he would come to his room later and let him know what happened. Adam went to his room and dialed Brad’s number.

“Hi Brad, it’s Adam. My cell phone died.”

“About time, bitch. I saw the tabloids with that douche calling you a slut. What did you do, fuck Nick?”

“No, he was drunk and I danced with Nick.”

“You should have fucked him. I saw his video and that guy can give head like a motherfucker. He could probably deep throat even you. The guy he sucks in his video is huge. You should totally try and get him to suck you off.”

Adam had never been deep throated because of his size and started contemplating the opportunity and then remembered his purpose for talking to Brad.

“I’ll keep that in mind. What is going on?”

“Kris’ old publicist came to my show and offered me 100K to rat out that douchebag. I told her I’d think about it. Of course, I would have done it for free just to fuck him over but than I thought it might hurt you. Plus, you seem to not be able to move on and then I would have to listen to your crying when he somehow managed to blame it all on you.”

“So does that mean you are willing to turn it down?”

“It means you can bribe my silence. You have to promise to stay away from that douchebag and have a threesome with me and Nick.”

Adam was thankful Brad was a silly negotiator and had a feeling he could counter him, “We both know I can’t stay away from Kris. How about I get Nick to fuck you?”

“Without you? I think he is a twink so we need you there plus it makes it hotter. I am sure Kris would be willing to let you do that if it saves his ass. Ask him. This way you can once again establish his level of douchiness. Not that it matters since he has a free pass to trample on your heart.”

Adam was curious if Kris would go for it. Adam clarified, “So one threesome and you keep your mouth shut?”

“OK but it has to last a few hours.”

Adam laughed at Brad’s silliness, “You get offered a hundred grand, a chance to humiliate Kris and the best you can come up with is a threesome with your ex and an over the hill pornstar? No wonder you never negotiate good deals for me.”

“Babe, you are getting off easy because I love you and you are still my hottest ex to date. Let me know your decision tomorrow because Gina is going to contact me in a couple days.”

Adam hung up and realized he did miss Brad after all. He was confidant Brad would never sell him out and would not hold him to the threesome. Adam went to Kris’ room and decided to test him. Kris let him in and kissed him.

Adam pulled back after a few seconds, “I spoke to Brad and he is willing to keep his mouth shut on one condition.”

“Let me guess, I disappear from your life?”

“No, he wants a threesome with me and Nick.”

Kris looked at Adam and became furious, “No fucking way. You are not considering it, are you?”

Adam shrugged, “Well, I thought we should talk about it since you think I am a slut anyway.”

Kris grabbed Adam by the chin, “Adam, I don’t think you are a slut and I am certainly not going to encourage you to fuck other people. I’ll pay Brad off with money or suffer the consequences. I am done throwing you to the wolves to save my ass.”

Adam was happy Kris didn’t go for it and kissed him response.

“Maybe Brad will settle for just Nick since he’s already had you.”

Adam kissed him again, “We’ll offer him up and see.” Adam maneuvered him toward the bed and pushed him on it when they were near it. Kris pulled Adam down with him. Adam felt all thought leave his head and lust take over. Once again enthralled by Kris’ wanton reactions to his touches, Adam started removing their clothes. Adam paused slightly before removing Kris underwear. Was it too much too soon? Fuck it, the freak outs happen anyway. Adam pulled Kris’ underwear off and stroked his already hard cock.

“I want you so bad, Adam.”

“And you are going to have me, baby.”

Adam felt Kris opening his legs under him and pushing against his erection. Adam thanked the universe for whatever was making Kris this hot for him. A second later Adam realized he was in Kris’ room and hoped he had supplies.

“Do you have lube and condoms?”

Kris stiffened a moment, “Don’t you?”

“Yeah,in my room. I don’t always keep that shit in my pocket, you know. Let’s take this to my room.”

“Can’t you just go get the stuff? I’ll stay here and fantasize about you ravaging me.”

Adam felt another jolt to his cock, “OK, baby, don’t start without me.”

Adam ran out of the room and headed to his room. He grabbed a handful of condoms and several packets of lube. He wanted to make sure Kris had supplies in his room too. As he headed out, a cell phone rang and Adam realized he still had Nick’s cell and Adam answered it,

“Hello.”

“Are you settled yet? I have been laying here naked waiting and I can’t wait much longer.” Adam hesitated as he recognized the female voice. Total mood kill.

“Er, Jade, its Adam I have Nick’s cell phone.”

“Fuck. Well, this is awkward. Please don’t mention this to Kris. Where is Nick?”

“I don’t know. Which room is he in so I can drop off his cell?”

Adam got the information and went to Nick’s room. Nick and Jason were in there having a beer talking.

“About time you give me back my phone.”

“Actually, it was one call too late. You might want to check your incoming calls, Romeo.”

Nick just smiled which made Adam want to punch him, “I spoke to Brad and he is going to corroborate Gina’ story unless you sleep with him.”

Nick looked at Adam, “Brad is willing to turn down 100K just to fuck me?”

“Well, he wanted a threesome with me too but I think he will settle for just you. Brad’s actually a pretty good lay so it won’t be too bad.” Adam thought he did a good job selling the idea.

Nick shook his head, “I am not about to fuck you or Brad. I told you before I don’t mix business and pleasure.”

“Well, I recently learned that statement is bullshit and this isn’t pleasure it’s business. You are my publicist and it is your job to prevent me from getting bad publicity. This is just an extension of your duties.”

“I am not about to fuck you or Brad since neither one of you is my type. I couldn’t possibly be less interested.”

Adam’s ego responded, “I agree Brad might not be your type but I think I am. You even said if circumstances were different-“

“I was patronizing you. Adam, you really are not my type. I don’t like my men so pretty. Now, I suggest you figure out a way to get Brad in the box that does not involve sex with me. Now go away; I am off the clock, cupcake.”

Adam couldn’t let it go, “You really would not fuck me?”

Nick shook his head, “What is with you and Brad? The two of you have this immature conquest issue. Do you compare notches in the bedpost too? In the grown up world we don’t get to fuck everyone we want.”

Adam was still annoyed at being rejected but proceeded to Kris’ room and knocked on the door. No one answered so he knocked louder. A few minutes later, a half asleep Kris opened the door.

“Why did you take so long? I fell asleep.”

Fuck, I blew it. “Because I am a fucking idiot. Do you want me to go?”

“I want to go back to sleep.” Adam felt crushed but then Kris reached out and pulled him in the room, “Sleep with me and then we can fool around in the morning.”

Adam allowed Kris to guide him to the bed. Adam put his sex supplies on the night table and stripped down to his boxer briefs. Kris pulled Adam against him once he climbed into the bed and snuggled against him. Although Adam was partially excited and hoping for sex, cuddling was a close second. Kris was obviously a cuddler which made him even more perfect. He felt like a kid the night before a birthday. Adam closed his eyes hoping to sleep to make the morning come faster so he could fool around with his present.


	31. Chapter 31

Impatience. Kris could not fathom why Adam was taking so long getting lube and condoms. What the hell is he doing? Granted his raging hard-on was probably making the clock move slower, but still. Kris laid down and was surprised when he was jolted awake by knocking. He was still half asleep as he opened the door to a frazzled Adam,

“Why did you take so long? I fell asleep,” Kris was too tired to be annoyed.

“Because I am a fucking idiot. Do you want me to go?” Adam’s voice belayed his disappointment.

“I want to go back to sleep,” Kris saw Adam’s face fall which was irresistible. Kris reached out and pulled him in the room, “Sleep with me and then we can fool around in the morning.”

Adam immediately perked up and followed Kris to the bed. Once Adam climbed in next to him, Kris snuggled up against him. An overarching feeling of comfort and happiness enveloped him. Kris fell immediately asleep and woke up slightly disoriented. It was early morning and the sun was just rising. Kris looked over and saw Adam sleeping innocently. His freckles made him look young and fresh. Kris pressed himself against Adam hoping his erection didn’t wake him or maybe hoping it would. Adam was beautiful and inviting. Kris decided to take advantage and ran his fingers along Adam’s body. Adam was a heavy sleeper. Unfettered by an awake Adam, Kris placed his hand down Adam’s boxer briefs and began stroking him. Kris felt Adam responding and smiled as Adam moaned still sleeping. Too enthralled in Adam’s reactions, Kris didn’t notice the vibrant blue eyes staring at him.

“Good morning to you too.”

Kris looked up and Adam smiled sensually. So beautiful. Kris kissed Adam,

“I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“You can wake me like that anytime, Kristopher Allen” Kris continued to stroke Adam fast enough to get him close but slow enough to delay the climax. The heat between them grew and Adam rolled on top of Kris. Adam pulled Kris’ underwear off and made his way down Kris’ chest and stomach. It was never this hot and frantic with Katy. Gay or not, Kris wanted Adam more than anyone ever before. Kris arched up as he felt the wet heat of Adam’s mouth around his cock. Frozen in euphoria, Kris laid back as Adam assaulted his senses. He was vaguely aware of Adam’s fingers entering him and the begging passing through his own lips.

“Oh…Adam, more…I want you…fuck me, Adam.”

Adam worked his way back up to Kris’ lips,

“Are you sure, Kris?”

Kris wanted Adam and needed to know if the sex between them was really going to work. He was a little nervous,

“Positive, stop being so coy. I really hope I like it.”

“If you don’t my ego will be crushed.” Kris cringed but Adam smiled, “It is a preference thing. I don’t like bottoming much but some people love it. Don’t pin our success on you liking bottoming. If you hate it, we can work out some kind of compromise or do other things. No pressure.”

Kris felt better with Adam’s words, “I want to try.”

Adam kissed him and checked that he had stretched Kris enough. Adam lifted Kris leg over his shoulder,

“This isn’t the easiest position but I want to look at you and make sure I don’t hurt you.”

Kris nodded as Adam lined his cock up to his entrance and slowly started to push in. Kris felt pressure and then pain. It didn’t feel right and certainly didn’t feel good.

“Breathe, baby, breathe.”

“It is not going to fit.”

Adam giggled, “Relax your muscles, it will fit and it will feel good soon.”

Kris tried to relax but then a sharp pain came as the Adam breached his entrance with the head of his cock. Kris started freaking out and pushing against Adam who didn’t seem to budge.

“I changed my mind. I don’t want-“ Kris screamed as Adam pushed all the way in. Kris eyes started tearing and his ass felt like it was on fire. He looked up at Adam questioningly and was returned by an apprehensive stare. In a small voice Adam explained,

“I’m in. I thought it might be better to take the bandaid approach.”

“Fuck you, asshole. I don’t like this. Get off me, I’m definitely not gay.” Kris felt sick. Adam kissed Kris’ neck gently and whispered,

“Kris, the worst part is over I promise. Please, give me a chance.” Kris felt Adam’s hand wrap around his limp cock. Kris felt uncomfortable and was surprised when his cock started to respond. Adam kept stroking him and kissing him gently. Kris was angry and hurt. He just laid there trying to stunt his growing erection. Kris felt Adam moving a little in him.

“Stop it, I don’t want this.” Kris looked up at Adam who seemed equally upset. Adam shifted again and Kris felt something sort of good which made his body relax. Adam must have noticed because he did it again and again. Kris had an idea Adam might be hitting his prostate. Kris decided to give it a chance. A minute later it went from not feeling bad to feeling amazing.

Kris grabbed Adam’s hips and started pulling him in harder. Adam was still stroking Kris.

“OK? You still want me to stop?”

“Shut the fuck up and keep going, harder.”

Adam started pushing in harder and deeper. Kris wrapped his legs around Adam’s waist and was lost in ecstasy. Kris felt like his whole body was on fire and felt a completeness he had never experienced during sex. Kris felt himself coming and thought he was going to pass out from his orgasm. Adam came soon after. Adam pulled out, removed the condom and tossed it in the trash.

“I’m sorry for pushing in suddenly. Please, don’t hate me.”

“Hate you? That was the best sex I ever had. I love bottoming. How can you not like that? It was fucking incredible.” Kris felt so relieved realizing the sex between them not only worked but was the better than any of his fantasies. As clumsy as it started, by the end they had found a beautiful rhythm. Kris gained a new appreciation as to why girls act so crazy about sleeping with men. Kris’ thoughts were interrupted as he felt Adam laying stiffly next to him. Kris noticed Adam staring at him with a strange expression, “What’s wrong?”

“I am a little traumatized. I was so terrified you were going to freak out and leave me.” Adam broke down, “I was so fucking clumsy pushing in like that. I wanted it to be this incredible experience and then you hated it-“

“Adam, calm down. This is par for the course with us it is never “perfect” but you know what it was better. It was a rocky start but then it got really, really good. More importantly, I want to do it again and again.”

Adam sniffled, “Really?”

Kris nodded and kissed him on the lips, “Really. Just so you know it is not you. Sex with me is always clumsy and awkward. That is kind of how I roll.”

Adam laughed, “Sex with you is fucking amazing. I am sorry I always get super emotional after; I can’t help it. I think laying here with you after making love is bigger than me having a hit record.”

“Just shows how insane you are but I kind of feel that way too. Right now I don’t even care that the world thinks I am a prick and Gina is about to humiliate me. Actually, I feel like telling the whole world you are my boyfriend…” Real smooth, retard! Adam probably thinks he has taken Cassonova lessons from a 12 year old girl.

“You think of me as a boyfriend?”

Kris looked away, “Kind of. I don’t think I want to ruin my career over a fuck buddy.”

“I don’t think you are ready to acknowledge me publicly so I am more of a lover not a boyfriend. It’s OK, Kris. I don’t want you to rush things. I am OK being your lover.”

Kris wanted to make sure they were on the same page, “Monogamous lovers?”

“Why don’t we take things slow?”

Kris shook his head, “No, I won’t share you. I mean it I can’t stand the thought of you doing this with anyone else. Monogamy or nothing.”

Kris was beginning to hyperventilate as Adam remained silent. Kris got up,

“You won’t give up Brad? Or are you still pursuing Nick? Or maybe you have a whole fucking list of people you need to fuck. How hard is it for you not to fuck other people, Adam?”

Adam became angry, “Why should I put myself in a position for you to be my whole world while you decide if you want to publicly acknowledge me. I can’t Kris and it is not fair to me.”

“I should have never fucked you. Actually, I didn’t have a choice, you fucking rapist.”

Kris saw the blood drain out of Adam’s face as he quietly responded, “Don’t say that.”

“Get out! You got what you wanted so leave.”

“That’s not fair-“

“Are you deaf too? Leave!”

Kris watched as Adam pulled on his jeans and walked out slamming the door behind him. Kris broke down and cried. He was hurt Adam didn’t want to be exclusive but even more devastated because he was sure there would never be anyone else he wanted more.

+++

Adam froze after quickly pushing all of himself into Kris. Maybe he should have stopped. Did I just rape Kris? In the back of his head Adam thought Kris was just getting first time jitters and going fast would make it better. Looking at Kris’ hurt and angry eyes, he wondered if he had miscalculated. This became even more apparent when Kris called him an asshole and tried to push him away. Adam stayed in place mostly because he couldn’t bear the thought of pulling out of Kris. He knew without a doubt he loved Kris and this just made the bond stronger. Unfortunately, that feeling appeared to be one sided.

Adam shifted his position hoping to hit Kris’ prostate. He felt Kris move beneath him and open slightly. Taking it as a good sign, Adam wrapped his hand around Kris cock hoping to get his lover excited again. Holy shit, is he responsive. Adam could not believe when Kris started arching into him and begging for him to go harder. Adam watched Kris come apart in his arms and felt like crying for joy. He was hoping to bathe in post-coital bliss but then suddenly Kris freaked out and called him a rapist. Adam felt nauseous and confused and ran out into the hallway.

Adam was freaking out and needed someone to calm him down. Without his cell phone, he had limited options. He went to Nick’s room hoping he would take sympathy on him and be open to talking. Adam banged on the door and waited. Nick opened the door annoyed but then seemed to hesitate,

“Adam, are you OK?”

“Can I come in?”

“Give me a second.” Adam heard movement inside the room and realized Nick wasn’t alone.

“I can come back.”

“It is fine, Jade was leaving anyway.” Jade came to the door and was blushing,

“Hi, Adam. He’s all yours.” Jade walked out. Adam was momentarily distracted,

“How long have you been sleeping with Jade?”

“None of your business, cupcake. Now, why do you look like someone stole all your hair gel?”

“Kris and I slept together and now he is freaking out.”

“What completely insensitive or inappropriate thing did you do?”

Adam hesitated, “I kind of raped him.”

“What! You raped him? What the-“

“He seemed nervous and I thought it would be better if I went fast.”

Nick scratched his head, “Wait, were you just clumsy or did you force yourself on someone that really did not want to have sex. Be very clear when you answer.”

Adam looked down, “I don’t even know. He said no but then he got into it. Then when we finished he freaked out and called me a rapist and threw me out of his room. ”

“Shit. That boy is confused as it is. Did you hit him or restrain him? Was he drunk? I need a little more detail, Adam.”

“No, he wanted to be with me. I even asked him if he was sure and he said yes. Then when I went in him a little he started tensing and told me to stop. I pushed down instead. Then once he adjusted he started to like it.”

“Well, that sounds more clumsy then forced. Are you sure nothing else went down? Think Adam.”

Adam tried to think what could have freaked Kris out and was at a loss. He relayed more detail hoping Nick could solve the mystery, “Afterwards, he sort of called me his boyfriend and I pointed out we were just lovers. Then he asked if we were monogamous lovers and then he called me a rapist.”

Nick narrowed his eyes, “What did you say when he asked if you were monogamous?”

“I explained that it was unfair to ask that of me.”

“You are a complete idiot, Adam. I am not surprised you are single. It is Kris’ first time to ever have anyone penetrate him and after you treat him like a cheap fuck. Nice.”

“He is the one that doesn’t want to acknowledge me. I was just keeping it real.”

Nick scratched his head in frustration, “Do you want to share Kris with other people? Are you willing to watch him pick up on a girl or test out another guy?”

Just the thought of Kris with another man made Adam’s blood boil.

Nick continued, “I can tell by your pissed off expression the answer is no. I have watched you and other than sleeping with your ex and acting inappropriately with me, you don’t even pursue all the men throwing themselves at you. Why make a stand on the monogamy issue? You and Kris just keep clouding the issue and letting your fears of rejection rule your relationship. It is incredibly pathetic.”

“I know but he acts like an insane man. Besides, he hates me now and thinks I raped him. What if he freaks out and tries to get me arrested.”

“I doubt Kris is calling the cops or using a rape kit. Let things settle for a couple days and then talk to him.”

Adam went back to his room, showered and dealt with his day. Nick shuffled him to interviews, promo work and then sound check. He did not see Kris at the arena until right before the show. Kris was hanging with his band and gave Adam a murderous look. Adam just ignored it and performed his set. The crowd was great and there were quite a number of fans backstage. A cute nineteen year old boy was gushing over Adam and being quite forward. Adam saw Kris looking over and shaking his head right before doing a shot of something. Not good, a drunk Kris was a volatile Kris. Adam tried to brush off the guy flirting with him but that seemed to encourage him more. The guy ran his hands along Adam’s thigh,

“I know some cool places in town, do you want to hang out after the show?”

Adam was working on his answer when he saw a pair of converse sneakers come up in front of him,

“Are you planning on adding statutory rape to your repertoire?” Kris turned to the guy, “He is not as good as he pretends. Some might say he’s clumsy.”

Adam reacted, “I am only clumsy with inexperienced, schizophrenic, closet cases. If you hated it so much what do you care if I go with someone else? You can’t have it both ways.”

Kris looked at Adam, “I’m not the one that wants his cake and eat it too.”

“No, you just want everyone on a diet.” Adam noticed the guy staring with bugged out eyes. Adam turned to him, “Mike, right? Listen, I appreciate the offer but I think I am just going to take it easy tonight.”

Mike looked at Kris, “Wow, I thought the rumors were bullshit. You don’t come off gay.”

“I am not gay.”

Adam couldn’t agree more, “That’s for sure you are too busy being psychotic.”

Jade came over and told Kris he had to go on stage in five minutes. Adam stared at Kris,

“Go ahead you effectively cock-blocked me. Now go perform and maybe when you come off stage you can have yet another personality.”

Adam hated fighting with Kris and wished he would not drink. He wasn’t sure if Kris was drunk or just in a jealous haze. So far, Kris had shown he had the potential to be a psycho boyfriend which is odd since he seemed so even keeled in his marriage. Mike walked away and went over by Nick. Adam turned back to Kris, “Have a great fucking night.”

Adam went to walk away but Kris grabbed him to stop him from leaving, “Kris-”

Adam was prevented from speaking anymore when Kris’ lips came crashing onto his own. Adam wished he could push Kris away and tell him off but unfortunately his only response was to kiss him back. A few moments later, Kris was pulled from him by Jason.

“Well, that certainly isn’t the way to quell rumors. You do realize there is a high probability pictures of you two making out will be on the internet tonight.”

Kris paled and looked at Adam, “You did that to out me!” Kris pushed Adam and walked away.

“You fucking kissed me!” Adam collapsed against the wall exhausted from the insanity that seemed emanate from Kris Allen. Nick came over and handed Adam a drink,

“At least he is over the rape thing.”


	32. Chapter 32

Acknowledgement. Kris went on stage leaving a confused Adam in his wake. Kris felt shaken up and slightly buzzed. He concentrated on his set and tried not to screw up. Feeling totally disconnected to the music, Kris just went through the motions hoping it would end soon. He came off stage and his guitarist Cale approached him,

“Dude, are you OK? That was a very bland performance.”

“I can’t be on every night.”

“Well, maybe you should wait until after the set to get drunk.”

Kris was annoyed by Cale’s insinuation that he had a drinking problem, “Whatever, Cale. Leave me alone, I am having a shitty night.”

“Really because it looked like you were having quite the time with Adam. Kris, you are not the only one that suffers from your bad publicity. I like Adam and have no problem what you do with him in private but I think you need to tell us if you are planning to come out.”

Kris did not want to have this discussion or deal with the issue of his coming out so he just walked away. Jason came by him and said he had to do a quick interview. Kris met with some people from a local TV station. He answered questions about the tour. They asked him if he was really throwing Adam off the tour.

“As tempted as I am, he is great on stage and a lot of people coming to the shows would be disappointed. Adam, will finish the tour.”

Jason told the interviewer to wrap it up. Kris was just asked about dates and locations of upcoming shows. Kris did a few more interviews and assumed Jason must have told them not to ask too much about Adam. Jake and Jade took Kris back to the hotel. The rest of the band went to party but Kris decided to stay in and go to bed. He woke up the next day feeling empty and depressed. It was only eight in the morning but he knew he wouldn’t fall back asleep. Jake had given him an earful on the ride home about accusing Adam of trying to out him. Kris was a little vague on the details but according to Jake, he had kissed Adam and yelled at him when Jason stopped them. Given his history, Kris thought Jake’s version was probably an accurate account of his bad behavior.

Kris couldn’t stop himself from getting up and going to Adam’s room. He sincerely hoped Adam hadn’t decided to have a one nightstand. Kris knocked on the door and continued to knock until Adam answered with a bad case of bed head. Without a word, Adam opened the door more for Kris to entered and walked back toward the bed. Kris went in and shut the door behind him. He followed Adam toward the bed and inquired, “Are you mad at me?”

“Kris, I was out until five in the morning and now it is eight in the morning. I am too exhausted to be mad which is why I am not screaming at you.”

Adam laid down and lifted the covers as an invitation. Kris took off his shoes and climbed in. Adam pulled him closer spoon fashion and kissed him softly on the ear before falling back asleep. Kris ended up dozing until noon when he was awoken by the phone ringing. Kris answered hoping to let Adam sleep,

“Get up, cupcake, you have a photo shoot and interview in an hour.”

Kris recognized Nick’s voice, “I’ll wake him up.”

“Kris? Listen, the pictures of you making out hit the internet and a clip of you screaming at Adam for trying to out you. Jason and I are about to meet to discuss damage control. Adam ran into Perez last night and at least managed to not make it worse.”

“Should I be there?”

Kris felt Adam’s hands run down his abs and his crotch.

“No, stay here.” Adam pressed his erection into Kris’ ass. Sold. Nick was saying something but Kris just interrupted,

“-OK, you and Jason can just brief me after, bye.”

Kris hung up and started kissing Adam. Adam responded passionately and quickly stripped off their clothes. Kris tried to be responsible and informed Adam,

“You have a photo shoot in an hour.”

“Ok, I won’t play hard to get.”

Adam grabbed some lube from his draw and poured some in his hand. Adam laid on top of Kris, wrapping his hand around both their cocks together and began jerking them both off. Kris was getting turned on by Adam’s cock rubbing against his. Adam’s big hands were certainly proving useful. Kris felt Adam tense and pick up the pace which brought Kris over the edge. Kris came with Adam immediately following. Their cum exploded between them coating their stomachs, cocks and thighs. Adam laughed,

“Messy. I am glad we are someplace that has maid service.”

Kris silently agreed. He got up and turned on the shower. Adam followed him into the shower.

Kris shook his head, “I would have been fast.”

“I know but I like being around you when you are naked.”

Adam helped Kris wash focusing a little too much on his lower half. Kris laughed, “I think I am clean now.”

“You can never be too sure.” Kris laughed and climbed out to let Adam finish up. Kris watched as Adam proceeded to shave practically all his body hair. Adam came out and kissed Kris on the lips short and began some kind of facial regiment. Kris was feeling tense waiting for Adam to mention the fact that Kris accused him of trying to out him. He was confused by Adam’s affectionate behavior and easy going manner. Didn’t he ever hold grudges? Unable to wait for the other shoe to drop,

“Aren’t you upset about what I did to you last night?”

“You know the saying fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. That was exactly like what you did to me the first time we got caught by paparazzi. I keep coming back for more and you keep doing it. Why waste my breath getting mad? Apparently on some level I am a masochist.”

Kris looked down, “I am sorry. Maybe I should give up drinking.”

“It is up to you but I think even sober you would pull that shit. If you want me as your dirty little secret, fine, but then stop exposing us and acting like a psycho.”

Kris laughed at Adam’s statement but then turned serious, “I want to be with you in a meaningful way.”

“How would that work when all our energy is focused on maintaining appearances? I can’t live in a closet all the time; it would destroy everything I worked so hard to cultivate in myself. I’m sorry it won’t work.”

Kris could practically hear Adam’s heart breaking in his voice. He had to try and fix it, “Can’t we start out slow? Maybe we can just tell some people.”

“Who are you willing to tell?”

Kris knew he had to make a grand gesture, “Everyone on the tour so we won’t have to sneak around as much.”

Adam seemed to think on it and then smiled, “That is pretty good. Kris, what do see happening to us in the future? Be honest, a year from now or five years from now do you see us together?”

Kris wasn’t sure how to answer and didn’t want to lie, “I don’t know, Adam, I really don’t know. I don’t think I would voluntarily give you up.”

Adam kissed him, “Well, that’s something. Look, I’ll make this easy, if you promise we can tell a few people and have sex often, I will stay monogamous.”

Kris hesitated a minute, “You would give up Brad?”

“In a fucking heartbeat; I love Brad and he is one of my best friends but he is a horrible boyfriend. He hurt me bad enough that I would never date him again. I don’t always exercise the most self control but I am capable of being faithful. I never cheated on Brad and I wouldn’t cheat on you.”

“Even with Nick?”

“Nick has made it crystal clear he is not interested in me so no worries there. I really like you Kris and I want things to work between us. Do you want to try?”

“Absolutely, even if it doesn’t workout it still a win because I get to have lots of sex with you.” Kris kissed Adam deeply.

+++

Adam downed the drink Nick gave him and then followed his band to some promotional party at a club. Monte mentioned to Adam that Nick really did a good job promoting them and that he was a really good publicist. From what Adam had seen with Gina and even Jason, he agreed. Adam had fun dancing and drinking with his band. Although there were quite a number of hot guys, Adam avoided hooking up with anyone. At about two AM, Adam was surprised to run into Perez Hilton.

“Adam Lambert, looking good as always. How is the tour going? Looks like you and Kris have found some common ground.” Perez showed him a picture of them kissing on his cell phone.

Adam decided to ignore the statement, “The tour is going well. Why are you out of LA?”

“Actually, I am visiting my sister and just happened to hear you were having an event here.”

“Don’t you ever take a break?”

“I do but I can’t pass up good stories. Come on you are totally going at it with Kris in a semi-public location, I am not even digging on this one.”

Adam laughed, “Yeah, I guess we kind of asked for it on this one.”

“Are you two together?”

“No, he is doing his own events. I am not sure what he had going on tonight.”

Perez made a face, “You know what I mean Adam.”

Adam made a face back, “You know I wouldn’t tell you either way. Who are you here with?”

“Some friends I know through my sister. Are you fooling around with your publicist? He is gorgeous. He is gay right?”

“He’s bisexual and no I am not fooling around with him.”

“Introduce me and I will leave you alone.”

Adam would be glad to get rid of Perez. Although it seemed mean to throw Nick at him, it was sort of his job since Perez was a celebrity blogger. Clearly, it was within Nick’s scope of work to appease reporters.

“Sure, his name is Nick.” Adam guided him over to Nick and his band and introduced Perez to everyone. Perez started talking to Nick and obviously flirting. Adam smiled when he saw Nick glare at him. Adam just danced more and then followed his group to an after-party. Adam noticed Nick was not with Perez and became concerned tomorrow’s blog would tear him apart.

“Where is Perez?

“I have no idea probably back at the other club.”

“Dude, you were supposed to be nice to him so he didn’t rip me to shreds in his blog.”

“Did you expect me to fuck him so you could have some positive press? Get real, Perez will write what he wants. Stop pimping me out. Speaking of which is Brad back in the box?”

“I don’t know I didn’t call him today. Jade gave me a new phone so I am sure he will call me soon. If push comes to shove, would you at least be willing to give him a blowjob?”

Nick just walked away. What a prude. Adam noticed it was almost five in the morning and decided to finally call it a night. Adam hit his bed exhausted and immediately fell into a deep dreamless sleep. He was jolted awake by knocking. He looked at the clock and noticed it was only eight in the morning and was pissed since Nick told him he could sleep until noon. Since the knocking didn’t stop, Adam answered the door and was mildly surprised to see Kris. Adam decided he was too tired for Kris Allen drama and simply let him in the room. Hoping to sleep longer, he laid down and made room for Kris figuring he would either join him or leave. Kris joined him and Adam snuggled right up against him figuring he may as well get a perk. With Kris’ scent filling his nostrils and his warm body pressed into him, Adam was having a hard time remembering he was pissed. Adam just gave into sleep.

Adam woke up hearing Kris talking on the phone, “Should I be there?”

No, stay and fool around with me. Adam expressed his wished by running his hand down Kris’ stomach and over his growing package. Adam was fully erect and pushed into Kris to make him aware of his state. In the back of Adam’s mind, he heard faint warning bells but as per the norm he ignored them. Once Kris ended the call, he responded by kissing Adam passionately. In their usual frantic, needy manner, Adam quickly stripped them. He was a little hesitant to get too aggressive after the last encounter. He worried Kris was sore and still upset with losing his virginity to a klutz. Instead, he went with pressing their cocks together and getting them off with friction and his hand. Adam watched as Kris’ expression became one of pure ecstasy squirting his cum between them which brought Adam over the edge. As with every time they were together, Adam fell just a little bit more for in love with him.

They showered together and Adam started getting ready for the day. He stiffened when Kris brought up yesterday’s backstage scene. Adam really didn’t want to talk about since it never seemed to change things. He acknowledged to himself that he was so pathetically in love with Kris, he would never give him up. In short he was screwed. Why bother talking about it? Kris surprised him by conceding to come out to everyone on the tour. Adam was shocked by the gesture and hoped Kris wasn’t just toying with him again. I will be able to kiss him backstage, cuddle with him on the bus, and stay in his room. Adam was happy and decided to return the gesture by agreeing to be monogamous. Adam didn’t mind since Kris had become an expert cock-blocker anyway.

Adam went to his photo shoot feeling pretty good. Nick shook his head,

“How long is it going to last this time before one of you freaks out? Two maybe three hours?”

“Kris has agreed to come out to everyone on the tour and I agreed to be monogamous.”

Nick looked at Adam and patted him on the back, “Finally, you two came out with a reasonable compromise and are acting like human beings. I spoke with SNL and they want you to be their musical guest. They also want you to do a skit. Jason and I thought this might be a good way to test the waters. The skit would poke fun at the whole stalking, possible romantic relationship between you and Kris. They want an onscreen kiss between you two. If the public totally freaks out we can say it was just a joke, if reactions are positive this would give you a shot at going public. What do you think?”

Adam liked it but wondered if Kris would do it, “Will Kris go for it?”

“I don’t know. Jason is probably talking to him now. Tomorrow we head to San Diego. Jake has arranged for his bodyguard friend to meet with us. If you like him, he will join the tour. The label is starting to see you as a valued asset and want you protected so we have to hire someone soon.

Adam was once again very thankful he had Nick and wanted to make sure he stayed with him.

“Thanks, Nick. You really are great and I appreciate-”

“Please don’t gush, cupcake, it’s my job and I am simply a nice guy.”

“You go above and beyond. I just want to make sure you know I appreciate it.”

“OK, I got it. Instead of praising me, how about you just stop pimping me out. Now, you have three interviews until six and then you are free for the night.”

Adam felt good that he had thanked Nick. He was sort of his boss and as such he felt it was his duty to give him positive recognition. Of course good managers didn’t sexually harass or pimp out their employees, but it was a start. Adam wrapped up the interviews and went back to the hotel. Once inside his room, his cell went off and it was Brad.

“Hi Brad. Did you sell me out?”

“Not yet. Did you set up a threesome?”

Adam wasn’t a big fan of lying but believed this was OK since he was being extorted. “Yeah, Nick is really into it but it will have to wait until we make it to LA.”

“Nick was into it?”

“Yeah he likes kinky.”

“You are the worst fucking liar ever. Nick would never be into me. Anyway moving on, I saw the pictures of you and Kris making out and the part where he accuses you of trying to out him. Now that I stepped back from the situation, that guy is a fucking riot. He really isn’t taking drugs?”

“No, Brad, he just gets drunk. So what about Gina?”

“I’ll tell her to fuck off but you owe me since I am giving up a lot of money.”

Adam hated be indebt to Brad, “OK, but you can’t ask for crazy shit.”

“Who me? I miss you. When are you coming to LA?”

“A couple weeks. How is the show going?” Adam felt grounded hearing Brad’s voice.

“Great, your replacement is hot and pretty accommodating. He’s not has well-endowed but he gives good head.”

Adam laughed, “How easily I am replaced. Brad, do you think I am capable of raping someone?”

Brad was silent for a moment, “For fucks sake, what is that douchebag doing now? No, Adam, you would never force someone.”

“Kris, called me a rapist after our first time and it freaked me out. He was into it and then when I started he got scared and I kept going. He seemed to like it but maybe he was pretending because he was scared.”

“Knowing him, he was freaked out that he was enjoying a guy fucking him up the ass and needed to blame you to make himself feel better. He is always fucking with your head. That is why I hate him. He chips away at your self confidence and makes you doubt yourself. It’s not healthy, Adam. The fact that you are even contemplating that you are some kind of monster is sick. What’s next is he going to start hitting you and make you tell people you keep running into fucking doors. Stay away from him.”

“I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s not like that.”

“Really? Then what is it like?” Adam could hear the exasperation in Brad’s voice.

“We are working things out. He is going to come out to everyone on the tour.”

“Wow, so now you only have to hide in the closet most of the time. You are fucking pathetic and an embarrassment to gay men everywhere. Call me when you decide to be at least half the man I used to love.”

Brad hung up on him. Adam’s happiness turned to sadness. He was confused and hurting. Part of him knew Brad was right but the other parts still wanted Kris. Adam decided this was their last chance. If Kris didn’t follow through with telling the tour members about them, he would move on once and for all.


	33. Chapter 33

Appreciation. Kris went back to his room happy and apprehensive at the same time. He knew he had to follow through with his promise to come out to everyone on the tour. Jade, Jake and Jason came to his room for the daily meeting. Having limited tact, Kris blurted it out immediately,

“Adam and I are together.” Kris saw their blank expressions, “You know like together-together. We are… more than friends-“

Jason held up his hand, “We get it. Are you wanting to go public?”

“No, but I promised Adam we could tell some people and be more relaxed on the tour.”

Jake looked at Kris, “Are you comfortable with this Kris or are you just trying to appease Adam?”

Kris looked at his bodyguard and shrugged, “A little of both.”

“Maybe you should take it slow. Not to be mean but you don’t have a good track record of acting sane when the shit hits the fan. No offense, Mr. Allen.”

Kris looked down, “I know but Adam resents being in the closet.”

“He is not in the closet. I mean 99.9 percent of the time I think the problems you encountered with him are your fault but you never told him to pretend he wasn’t gay. You never told him to tone down his flamboyancy or pretend to be heterosexual. You just didn’t want to be public about being with him. There is a difference.”

Jason nodded in agreement with Jake and added, “Kris, going public it is going to be hard and you can’t go back. You are a private person and everyone is going to want details. There are not a lot of openly gay couples so people will become obsessed. Plus, Adam’s fans are insane. That being said, I think you should stop vehemently denying your relationship with Adam especially since you keep getting caught together. I am sure Adam would be happy if you just stopped throwing him to the wolves all the time.”

“Do you think the label will drop me?”

“They will drop you if they don’t thing you are a viable artist. I think if you keep making music that you don’t connect with and pretend to be something your not, you will suffer as an artist and get dropped anyway. Kris, it is your life and you need to live it. If Adam makes you happy, be with him and trust in your talent. You are better than just a teen heart throb.

Kris felt relieved and happy the world did not cave in. Actually, he felt like a little bit of a burden was lifted, “I still want to tell the people on the tour. Do you think my band will freak out?”

Jake laughed, “Kris, everyone on this tour knows you and Adam are fooling around. I think they will just be happy to not have to pretend that they don’t know.”

Kris smiled. They continued the meeting and Jason mentioned Adam going on SNL and him doing a scene. Kris was hesitant, “Aside from not being ready to go totally public, I am a really bad actor. Why do you think my videos are so basic?”

“They will make your lines simple and Adam can act so he can carry the scene. I think it is a great way to test the waters and really improve your public persona. Poking fun at yourself may help people forgive you for being a jerk lately, no offense.”

Kris wasn’t sure, “I need to think about it and I want to talk to Adam before I decide.”

“OK, Kris. The episode will be filmed in a month. Are you still going home next week?”

“Yeah, it’s my Mom’s birthday. I will fly home for just four days right after the LA shows.”

“Good.” Jason showed Kris Perez Hilton’s latest blog which headlined ‘Sluts are OK as long Allen gets a piece of the action too’ and showed him and Adam in the middle of a passionate kiss. The article went on to explain just a few days earlier Kris was caught on film calling Adam a slut and throwing him off the tour. Also, that Adam could do so much better and the fact that Adam outsold Kris at least ten times over. Some of the comments were from his fans claiming it was photo-shopped.

Kris was getting upset, “Should I make a statement?”  
“I think it will be better if you don’t because you can’t get caught in more lies. Just focus on your stage performance. Adam will have to do some media but he is much smoother at dodging bullets.”

“He’s a far better rock star than I am.”

Jason smiled, “Don’t sell yourself short, you have done very well. Anyway, tonight you have the night off. Adam is playing an acoustic set at some gay club. If you decide to throw all caution to the wind and go, take Jake and for the love of God don’t drink.”

Kris just rolled his eyes. His cell rang and saw it was his mother. The meeting was over so he took the call hoping she didn’t see the articles.

“Hey Mama, how is everything at home?”

“Good, honey. Your Dad is helping the repair the church and Daniel is busy with school. How is everything with you?”

“OK. The tour is keeping me busy.”

“Are you doing OK? Have you been taking care of yourself and not drinking too much? I saw Katy the other day and she seemed concerned.”

Kris wondered what all Katy told his mother or what she knew from the media, “I’m doing OK. I am looking forward to a break and coming home for a few days.”

“Are you coming alone? Why don’t you bring your friend?”

Kris’ heart starting racing and he began to sweat, “My friend who?”

“That boy you were kissing in the photos. Kris, your father and I talked about and we want you to feel comfortable with who you are. I saw an Oprah episode where gay people talked about how hard it was to come out to their families and I don’t want you to feel like that. Your father is even reading the Greg Louganis autobiography and we rented Milk.”

Kris felt a panic attack coming on, “Mama, I’m not gay. The media-“

“Honey, are you hyperventilating? I just want you to know I love you and if you want to bring your friend, he is welcome.”

“Aren’t you worried what people would say? The media is eating me alive.”

“The only thing I worry about is you being happy. I see the news and the blogs and all the mean things they say but worse than that I see pictures of you where you look sad. You aren’t yourself, you are drinking too much and doing crazy stuff. Frankly I am scared to death you are going to hurt yourself. Kris, your Dad and I want you kids to be healthy and happy. We don’t care who you love as long as they are a good person. Do you care about this boy?”

“His name is Adam and yeah I care. I just don’t want to be the gay guy; my fans would hate me.”

“Adam is gay and his fans seem to love him for it. Actually, women love him. Your Aunt Reba is totally obsessed with him and grandma keeps mistaken him for Elvis. Kris, you always try to please everyone and usually end up pleasing no one. Why don’t you do what you want for a change and maybe that will at least please you. I am happy you are coming home for a visit. All I am saying is if Adam makes you happy, he is welcome in our house. Either way, I love you and can’t wait to see you.”

“I’ll let you know, Mama. I love you too.” Kris hung up and cried. He was freaked out by the phone call and just put it out of his mind. He definitely wasn’t ready for Adam to meet his parents. He decided to just watch a movie and focus on not having a panic attack. He wanted to drink but after his mother called him out on drinking, he decided to forgo the cocktail. A few hours later, Adam came to his room. He seemed anxious which made Kris nervous,

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, did you tell your band?”

“I didn’t see them today.” Kris saw Adam’s face drop, “I told Jason, Jade and Jake though.”

“They already knew. Kris, you promised.”

Kris got mad, “I didn’t break my promise. I just didn’t have a chance yet. We never said it had to be today. Adam, relax, I will tell them tomorrow.”

Adam looked really sad which broke Kris’ heart. He wanted Adam to be happy, “Adam, I really want us to work. I am going back to Arkansas for my Mother’s birthday right after we do the LA shows. That’s why we don’t go to Santa Barbara until almost a week later.”

Adam seemed to get more upset, “Oh, well have fun. I am going to go see Brad’s show and catch up with my friends.”

Kris did not want Adam near Brad, “Are your plans set in stone?”

“Sort of, why?”

Kris shrugged, “I thought maybe you could come with me and maybe meet my family.”

Adam stared at him, “You want me to meet your family? What will you tell them?”

“My mother already knows about us. She told me to invite you.”

Adam’s eyes lit up, “She knows were lovers?”

“Well she knows I kiss you and I like you. I have to warn you, some my female relatives are obsessed with you and might molest you.”

“You can protect my honor. What are you going to introduce me as? Your tour mate?

Kris looked down, “Since we are monogamous, I was going to call you my boyfriend.”

Kris was worried Adam was going to freak out or enlighten him that they were not there yet. Instead, Adam kissed him long and man handled him to the bed. Kris kissed him back, “Don’t you have a show?”

“Fuck! Shit, I have to leave now. Come see me play, it will be an acoustic set. We can do a song together if you want. That will squelch the rumors you are firing me.”

“I am not sure about the duet but I will come cheer you on.”

“Ok, it’s a gay club so people dress fashionable, no plaid. Meet us in the lobby in ten minutes, boyfriend.”

+++

Adam was excited to do a solo gig at a club. Truth be told, he preferred intimate settings when he performed plus this would be his fans only. No holy rollers giving him pitying and hateful looks. Adam was still upset by Brad’s comments and needed confirmation that Kris was not just fucking with him yet again. Adam had a half hour before they headed to the gig so he stopped by Kris’ room. As soon as Kris mentioned he hadn’t seen his band that day, all of Brad’s words came flooding back to him and he became reacted. He knew it wasn’t reasonable to give Kris only eight hours to come out, but he should have come out long ago. Adam was totally shocked when Kris invited him to his home in Arkansas. He is going to come out to his family and introduce me as a boyfriend? It sounded too good to be true. When Adam left Kris’ room and quickly grabbed his stuff for the gig. He went downstairs and his band, Nick, Jake, Jade and Kris were there. Kris was looking good in a fitted black shirt and tight jeans.

Nick nudged Adam, “Easy now, you have to get through your show first. Your leering is making everyone uncomfortable.”

Adam just glared at him and went out of the lobby towards their ride. Adam rode with his band and one of the roadies while Kris went with his staff and Nick. The club was totally packed and Adam was escorted to the VIP lounge by the club owner. Adam told him he had a few more guests on the way. Adam sat down with his band and a cocktail waitress bought them a couple bottles of champagne. The band was happy. Adam saw Kris and company come in. Nick was chatting with the club owner like they were old friends. Adam made room for Kris to sit next to him.

Kris sat down and accepted a glass of champagne. Adam fought the urge to kiss him, “How was the ride over?”

“Fine, looks like Jade and Nick are getting along well. I think they like each other.”

Adam laughed at Kris’ naivety, “Maybe. What duet are we singing?”

“I’m not so sure that is a good idea. We never practiced anything together ever.”

“So what, it will be like a jam. How about Broken by Seether?”

“Too romantic, what about Crazy, Gnarls Buckley.”

“Let me check with Monte that he knows it.”

“I can play it on the guitar.”

“You are so perfect.” The club manager and Nick came over to tell them to set up. They started playing their set an hour later. Adam loved the energy in the crowd and the fact that he could be as taboo as he liked. Adam noticed Perez Hilton was still in town. He briefly considered canceling the duet but he really wanted to sing with Kris. At the end of the set Adam announced, “Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome my good friend Kris Allen to the stage. He is going to help me since Crazy.”

Adam watched as Kris came up and took the guitar from Monte. Adam enjoyed performing with Kris and once again fell just a little more in love with him. If Kris could stop being a psycho, admit to being in a gay relationship, avoid putting Adam in dangerous positions and not publicly shame him, Adam was sure the could be the perfect couple. But, that was a tall order. They came off stage and Perez Hilton came right over.

“Hi Adam, that was a great set. You two should do that duet in your concerts. I think it would help make your fans play nice with each other. How many LA shows are you doing?”

“Two. If you don’t make me or Kris out to be assholes in tomorrow’s blog, I’ll send you tickets.”

Perez laughed, “Come on Adam, what kind of blogger would I be if I could be bought off so cheaply? I have to write about this but since you are going to give me backstage passes I’ll leave out all the lovey dovey eye contact you had on stage and the fact that any moron can tell you two are totally together.”

Adam stared at Perez, “You don’t know what you are talking about. We are good friends and you are just seeing our mutual admiration.”

Perez laughed, “Perfect, that is exactly how I will word it. I heard Kris’ PA is going to do a tell all interview with the enquirer. Any truth to that?”

Adam noticed Kris pale, “I heard the same rumor. Unless she makes a bunch of stuff up it won’t be a very long article, no offense Kris.”

Perez laughed, “Have a good night and I will see you back in LA.” Perez walked away to rejoin his friends.

Kris looked like he was freaking out. Adam rubbed his back, “Don’t worry the truth is so unbelievable no one will buy it. Besides, it will build our publicity for SNL.”

“I haven’t agreed to do the show. I am not a good actor.”

Goal tonight-not cause Kris to have a melt down and humiliate both of us. Adam just hoped it was an attainable achievement. Adam just smiled, “OK, baby. Let’s just drop it and have fun.”

The rest of the night went relatively smooth and they returned back to the hotel. Adam was hoping Kris would want to spend the night together and was getting ready to ask when Kris spoke,

“Finally, let’s go to your room. I’ve been sporting a hard on for you for the last three hours.”

Excellent. They went to Adam’s room and Kris attacked him the second he shut the door. Kris was kissing him and frantically pulling off own clothes. Adam did not want anything to go wrong and was still gun shy because of the ‘rapist’ accusation.

“Kris, if you don’t like something or you want to stop just tell me. We don’t-”

“Less talking and more stripping, Adam. Stopping is the furthest thing from my mind.”

Adam laughed at Kris’ pushiness, “OK but if you do, I will”

“OK, now shut-up and kiss me.” Adam was caught off guard by Kris’ aggression. Once naked Kris pushed Adam on the bed and straddled his hips. Kris was kissing and biting Adam’s chest passionately and moving his hips against Adam’s erection. Adam was rock hard and quickly losing control. Adam prayed Kris didn’t test him with a ‘no’ because he wasn’t sure he really could stop.

“Where is your lube and condoms?”

“In my suitcase pocket across the room.”

“Mm, not very convenient. In the future, you should keep it by the bed.” Was that a seduction tip from the America’s darling? Kris got up and went through his suitcase. Adam cringed as Kris just callously rummaged through his carefully packed clothes. Unable to hold back,

“Stop abusing my wardrobe! I said it was in the fucking pocket away from my clothes.” If it wasn’t Kris, Adam would have skipped the sex to refold his clothes. Kris shoved all the clothes back in the suitcase and held up the lube and condoms with Cheshire smile, “Success.”

“That is a matter of opinion. Now get over here and make me forget about my clothes you probably ruined.”

Kris came over and immediately wrapped his lips around Adam’s cock. Adam moaned, “OK, you are forgiven.”

Kris continued to suck on Adam’s cock but stopped before his release. Kris climbed back on Adam and opened the condom package. He put the condom on Adam and then poured a ridiculous amount of lubrication. Adam had the feeling Kris didn’t know what he was doing but it was way too hot to stop him and ask. Kris lifted himself up and tried to lower himself on Adam which of course was not working and almost made Adam laugh.

“I am too big and you are too tight for you to mount me unprepared. You need to open yourself up with your fingers. You want me to do it.”

Kris nodded. Adam dipped his fingers into the pool of lube that had formed on his lower abdomen since Kris had drenched him with half the bottle. Adam gently began preparing him. Kris was not very patient and kept telling Adam to hurry. Once Adam was able to get three fingers in he told Kris he was ready. Kris wasted no time trying to take Adam inside him. Hopefully, it would not be too painful for Kris. Surprisingly Kris was able to lower himself all the way down but then froze,

“I am stuck and it hurts.”

Adam started laughing and Kris smirked, “That feels good you are vibrating. What do I do now?”

“Take a moment to relax and adjust. Then try moving up and back down a few times. If it is uncomfortable we can switch positions.”

Adam felt Kris relax and his body stretch. Kris started moving slowly which was driving Adam insane. Adam grabbed the sheets to keep from flipping Kris over to fuck him hard and fast. Kris began to move quicker and then found the right angle and started riding Adam in earnest. Kris was totally uninhibited and natural. Maybe it was just his lack of experience or his extremely responsive body but watching Kris was the hottest thing Adam had ever experienced. As soon as Kris tensed, Adam responded by coming himself. They were totally in synch as lovers. Now, if they could just get on the same page outside the bedroom.

Adam lifted Kris off him and disposed of the condom. “You will definitely be sore tomorrow. Hell, I think you bruised my pelvic boned slamming down onto me.”

Kris blushed, “I still have a lot to learn, huh?”

“You don’t need to learn a damn thing. You are amazing and the perfect lover.” Adam tried to stop himself from emotionally gushing but of course failed, “I think I am in love with you.”

Kris smiled, “Let me know when you are sure.”


	34. Chapter 34

Backstep. Kris woke up in Adam’s bed sore but satiated. Adam was sound asleep against him. Kris snuggled closer and was rewarded when Adam wrapped an arm around him and kissed him on the neck. Kris slept another half hour and then he and Adam got up. Jade called and said they were leaving in an hour. Kris walked Adam to the door. Kris smiled, “See you later, beautiful.”

Adam’s eyes lit up at the endearment, “Yeah ok. By the way, I’m sure.”

Kris wanted to hear the words to be sure Adam was saying he loved him but didn’t want to risk ruining the moment. Instead he nodded and Adam just left. Kris called Jade to help him pack and went down to board the buses. Kris decided to ride on Adam’s bus and the two watched some dvds together.

Once they arrived in San Diego, Jason whisked Kris off to some media events which were very controlled. Jason was strong-arming the reporters more and insisting they focus on the music and the tour. Kris did assure everyone Adam was remaining on the tour and the two were on good terms. One bold DJ ignored Jason’s warnings and asked Kris about the photo of him sucking face with Adam and then the video accusing him of outing him.

Kris decided to try Adam’s approach and skirt the truth, “Like most of the media around us they were taking out of context and blown out of portion. I prefer to keep my personal life private so I am not going to explain pictures and videos taken without my consent.”

The DJ moved on and Kris felt good when he saw Jason nod his approval at him. For once, I didn’t choke on my foot. Maybe the key was to be honest without blurting inappropriate information. Still, easier said then done. Kris decided not to push his luck and stuck to music for the rest of the interview.

The rest of the day went by in a blur. Adam invited him to dinner with his father but he couldn’t make it because he had to do a charity event. Adam spent the night at his Dad’s and Kris slept alone. He missed Adam and was glad he was coming to Arkansas with him. The next afternoon, Kris held is daily meeting with his staff and learned that Gina was giving him until the end of the day to agree to her terms.

“She claims your former drummer has agreed to back up her allegations that you and Adam are lovers, you are a mean person, you are mentally unbalanced and that you are a drunk,” explained Jason.

“He tried to rape Adam.”

“Yeah and you didn’t report it. I think she is going to go for the jugular and you need to be prepared to weather the storm. She is going to try and take down Adam too. Nick told me she approached him a couple days ago offering to spare Adam’s reputation for a quarter million.”

“Why is his extortion fee so much cheaper?”

“Well, he is not as rich and she has less dirt on him. Is that really the main point you want to discuss?”

Kris felt chagrined, “No, of course not. What did Adam say?”

“I don’t even know if Nick told Adam. Nick told her to fuck off unless she had photos of him fucking a puppy. He reasoned she probably could not come up with anything worse than what was already out there.”

“He should tell Adam. I don’t want to pay her.”

Jake spoke up, “Go to the police, Kris. You may to have to come clean and testify in court but blackmailers never go away unless they are stopped. The good news is if you go to the police neither one of you will be able to go public. She won’t be able to sell your story until they finish the investigation.”

Kris started hyperventilating, “Everyone will know and it will be a media circus. I’m not ready.”

His staff looked at him sympathetically and Jason spoke up, “Unless you have 2.5 million, I don’t really see a choice.”

Jake spoke up, “Kris, I have dealt with blackmailers before, it will be 2.5 million now and six months later it will be another million.”

Kris was confused and scared to death, “Maybe she will take less. I don’t want to go to the police. Not yet. Can’t you scare her Jake?”

Jake shook his head, “Kris, I’ve told you before I am not going to break the law. I am certainly not about to rough up your irate, publicist that is blackmailing you. Are you trying to get me locked up?”

Kris felt bad, “Sorry, I am not thinking straight. We need to talk to Adam and Nick before we decide.”

Jason went to go get Nick while Kris tried to call Adam. Adam’s cell went into his voicemail and Kris just left a message to call him. Kris focused on all his breathing techniques to prevent a full on anxiety attack. Jason and Nick returned to his room ten minutes later with an intimidating looking man. He was about 6’2” and had 250lbs of solid muscle. He had short blonde hair, green eyes and a very cold expression. He was attractive in a scary way.

Nick spoke, “Hey Kris, how are you doing? This is Nolan, Adam’s new body guard.”

“Freaking out,” turning to Nolan, “Nice to meet you. Did you work with Jake?”

Nolan shook his hand, “For a few years. We have known each other for about twenty years. I ended up more of a thug than an agent.”

Note to self, don’t screw with Adam’s security. Kris just nodded. Nick spoke up, “Adam is still at his Dad’s and actually isn’t coming back until tonight. He wanted more quality family time. Jason filled us in, Kris this is like an infected wound. The peroxide is going to burn but then it will heal and you will be much better off.”

Kris broke down, “Everyone is going to hate me.”

“I can tell you from experience, when shit like this goes down, your true friends stick by you and the phony people fade away. It is actually cathartic and you end up with a stronger circle.”

“What if I lose Adam? The media will go crazy.”

“First off Adam knows the truth, he was there. Second, media frenzies don’t intimidate Adam they turn him on. You just have to make sure you don’t push him away. I am sure he will support you through this.”

Kris felt totally disconnected with his body and knew he was seconds away from a total melt down. Nick noticed and got him a drink from the mini bar. Kris downed the whisky. The burning in his throat and stomach actually kept him grounded.

Jake again mentioned going to the police but Nick spoke up,

“We need to let the label know if we are going to the police. I spoke to Rick when I first heard she was blackmailing Kris and he was worried she would implicate him and the label. Apparently there were quite a few candid discussions between the label and your publicist on how to keep Adam quiet to include some incriminating emails. The other problem is you made a lot of false official statements to the police and potentially failed to report a hate crime. I think you are too dirty to go to the police. My advice is to ride it out. Let her blab to the enquirer.”

Nolan spoke, “I don’t know all that went down but sounds like Nick is right. If she had such a great story she wouldn’t waste her time with blackmail. It’s a cowardly move.”

Kris was happy not to go to the cops and then suggested, “Maybe we should record her trying to blackmail me.”

Jake shrugged, “It couldn’t hurt, though I am not sure it will stand up in court. Oh that’s right, we aren’t relying on the law.”

Kris had another interview that day and then went to Jason’s room for the phone call. Jake, Nolan and Nick were there. Gina was going to call about seven that night. Jake and Nolan were finishing up installing the taps and recording devices to Jason’s cell phone. Kris’ phone went off and he frowned at the strange number,

“Hello.”

“Hello douche bag, will you please tell Adam I left my sunglasses at his Dad’s house.”

“Why didn’t you just call him?”

“Because I wanted to make sure you knew I was with Adam at his Dad’s,” answered Brad in a tone like he was talking to a mongoloid.

Kris felt the anger boiling up in him, “I thought you were in LA?”

“Adam asked me to come down for a couple days. I guess you were busy or maybe he just wanted uncomplicated, non-psychotic fun.”

Kris hung up on Brad. Between the stress of Gina going home and now Adam cheating, Kris lost it and threw his phone against the wall. Everyone stared at Kris as he growled, “Keep her quiet, I do not want to go public with Adam.”

Nick spoke, “Kris? What’s wrong?”

“My boyfriend just fucked his ex again.”

Nick rolled his eyes, “Did I blink and miss your whole courtship? Since, when are you and Adam ‘boyfriends’? I am pretty sure you have to date first.”

Kris wished he had kept his mouth shut since everyone was looking at him like he was insane, “Adam and I agreed to be monogamous.”

“Aside from all the ‘this is a bit premature’ arguments, what makes you think he cheated?”

“Adam asked me to go meet his Dad but I couldn’t because of a charity event. I guess he was mad and did his usual and ran to Brad.”

Nick shook his head, “He is an idiot if he did that. Why don’t you give him a chance to explain?”

Kris just didn’t care anymore. He needed to get drunk and could care less about the repercussions because his heart was broken. Kris left Jason’s room not even caring what happened with Gina. He went to his room and began to make his way through the mini-bar starting with the tequila.

+++

Adam woke up half expecting a freaked out Kris. Instead, he found Kris snuggling up against him. It was going to be a good day. They got up and had to head to San Diego. Kris further surprised him by coming on his bus and spending the time watching movies and hanging out. Once they arrived in San Diego, his Kradam time was over. Adam had to meet with his new body guard and Kris had promo work. He invited Kris to have dinner with his father but Krs had a charity event. Adam was disappointed but tried to act maturely and just said next time.

Adam went down to the restaurant and met with Nolan Crispin. Nick had agreed to help interview him. Adam let Nick take charge,

“So Nolan, Jake recommended you to us. Do you have a resume?”

“Actually, Mr. Sans, I don’t. I can provide you with references and a police check and tell you about my experience if you like.”

Nick looked at Adam unimpressed. Adam liked him for some reason,

“Tell us, Nolan.”

“I worked for the CIA for ten years and then quit for personal reasons. I did some personal training and worked as a bouncer for a couple years. Then, for the last five years I have been doing freelance security work for businessmen and people needing protection.”

“Do you have a problem with me being gay?”

“No, I don’t judge people’s lifestyles unless it endangers their life.”

Adam wanted to make sure Nolan was on board, “So you don’t mind going to gay clubs?”

“Mr. Lambert, I doubt anything in your lifestyle is going to shock me. I have worked for some pretty strange people. As for the gay issue, there is no issue.”

Nick nodded, “Are you married? Any kids? The hours may be erratic.”

“No, I am used to working around other people’s schedules.”

Adam was curious, “Do you like my music?”

Nolan smiled, “I saw you in Wicked and you were very good. I don’t really like pop music.”

Adam shrugged, “You will.”

Nolan was hired on the spot. Adam went back to his room to pack an overnight bag to stay at his father’s house. His cell rang and it was Brad.

“I got you tickets for my show on Thursday and I am planning to have a party Friday. You have five days off before your concert, right?”

Adam didn’t want to lie but was leery of telling Brad the full truth, “Yeah but I am going out of town for a few days. I was hoping to catch your show Sunday, the 5th. Our concerts are on the 3rd, 4th and 6th.”

“Where are you going? Is it work related? You promised we would spend some time together.”

“I know and we will. It’s not directly related to work.”

Brad was silent a minute which made Adam nervous, “Are you going somewhere with that douche bag?”

“He is not a douche bag, well not always. Yes, I am going to meet his family in Arkansas.”

“NO! Adam, are you fucking crazy? Do you want to be a bad scene in Deliverance. Please, you can’t you could die.”

Brad was pleading hysterically which was freaking Adam out, “Brad, calm down. What am I going to die from bad southern cooking?”

“Adam, look what happened when you went hiking. Now you would be in the wolves den. Please, where are you?”

“I am going to my Dad’s.”

“Fine, I will see you in three hours. We are going to talk about this. I am scared for you.” Brad hung up. Adam was a little weirded out by Brad’s reaction but hoped he was just high and being stupid. Adam arrived at his father’s house and made himself a vodka martini. He and his Dad spent an hour catching up. Adam warned his father Brad might drop by later which he did.

“Hello, Eber, I came to prevent your son from committing suicide.”

Eber Lambert just nodded, “That’s nice, Brad. I assume you want free food too.”

“Yes, I missed dinner to drive here.”

Adam rolled his eyes, “Brad, you’re welcome to stay for dinner but no Kris Allen bashing or apocalyptic talk.”

“Fine.” Brad began to discuss his play, his new love interest and a bunch of other inappropriate topics. Adam was glad when the meal was over. Eber went to bed at midnight leaving Adam and Brad to his booze. Adam knew it wasn’t a good idea to get drunk with Brad but as usual he did not heed his own warnings.

“Why are you going to Arkansas?”

“Kris invited me to meet his family. He is coming out to them.”

“And you believed him? I have a really bad feeling about this. I am begging you not to go.”

Adam had never seen Brad so serious, “Brad, I really like him and want to meet his family.”

Brad grabbed Adam’s hands and started kissing him on his wrist and working his way up Adam’s arm,

“Please, baby, don’t go. Stay with me in LA like you promised.” Brad started kissing his neck and rubbing his hand over his hardening cock. It felt good and Adam was pretty drunk. He thought about Kris and the promise he made. Brad went to kiss him on the mouth,

“I can’t, Brad. I promised Kris we would be monogamous and I don’t want to cheat.”

Brad looked at Adam annoyed, “Monogamous! The guy won’t even admit he is gay so how could you be in a committed relationship. Isn’t it crowded with all his fucking personalities?”

Adam bit his lip not to laugh and then looked down, “Brad, you broke my heart and I am finally moving on. Can’t you be happy for me?”

“No, because the guy is a menace. Need I beat a dead horse and recap your history with him? Are you really, really in love with him?”

Adam looked at Brad and nodded. Brad ran his hair in frustration, “Well, than you are fucked. So no matter what I say or do you are going to go to Arkansas?” Adam nodded and Brad added, “Take Nick.”

Adam looked at Brad like he was high, “I can’t show up to my boyfriend’s parent’s house with another guy, Brad.”

“If I were you, I would show up with a fucking army. He is like a black widow.”

Adam didn’t want to fight with Brad over Kris. He understood his position since it was Brad called every time Kris screwed him over. Brad suddenly hugged Adam for dear life and cried, “I love you so much and I am really scared that something bad is going to happen. Maybe his family are jerks. Wasn’t his brother on the hiking trip? Please take Nick. He can stay in a hotel. Consider this my payback for turning down the 100K from Gina.”

“You’re willing to pass up sex with Nick for this?”

Brad reconsidered for a moment, “You see how serious I am? I never give up sex.”

Adam knew Brad would not relent so he agreed to take either Nick or his new bodyguard. They went to bed. Adam was proud of himself for resisting sex with Brad. Even when Brad tried to molest him in his sleep, Adam refused to fool around. Adam had few morals but he believed in being faithful. The next day Brad and Adam met Nick for lunch. Nick finally agreed to go to Arkansas when Brad promised not to attempt to extort sex from him and quit as Adam’s PA. After lunch Brad headed back to LA and Nick returned to the hotel. Adam decided to spend the day with his father and return to the hotel in the evening.

Adam’s cell phone had died after lunch so he had been unreachable. Adam spent the afternoon with his Dad but by mealtime he missed Kris too much to stay away. He decided to forgo dinner with his Dad to spend time with Kris. When he returned to his hotel room, he charged his phone and saw he had a number of messages from Kris, Nick, Nolan and even Jake. Adam was worried and listened to them as he made his way to Kris’ room. He knocked on the door. Kris answered and let Adam in. Both Nick and Jason were in the room sitting at the table drinking a beer.

Adam went to kiss Kris short on the lips. Kris turned his head so Adam kissed his cheek. Adam could smell the booze and wondered why Kris had been drinking. Not good.

“How was your charity event?”

“Fine. How was your Dad? Did you have a good time last night?”

Adam was surprised by Kris’ cold tone and made him wonder which Kris he would be dealing with that night. Keeping his voice neutral, “My Dad is good. We had a nice dinner and then I spent the day with him.”

“Just him?”

“Pretty much. I had lunch with Nick.” Adam didn’t want to mention Brad since Kris was drunk and tended to be irrational.

“You lying, slut. You couldn’t even last a week out of Brad’s bed! I am so sick of putting my career on the line, alienating friends and family only to have you sleep with your ex-boyfriend. Did you fuck him in a public restroom again?”

Adam was shocked and was furious. Kris wasn’t giving him a chance to explain and as usual assumed the worst. He was even more hurt because he had actually done the right thing. Adam was not a cheater and resented being called one and decided not to correct Kris. Instead he just shrugged,

“Well, you were busy and that’s what sluts do.”

Nick looked at Adam, “Did you really fuck Brad?”

Adam looked at Nick and shook his head. Nick smacked him in the back of the head, “Then stop pretending you did. I am not in the mood for you two spinning out of control over nothing. We have real issues to deal with. Kris, apologize to Adam for being an ass by calling him a slut and thinking the worst.”

Adam saw regret in Kris eyes, “You really didn’t do anything with him? He called me to let me know he had been with you.”

“I told him we were monogamous and I wouldn’t cheat. He was worried about me going to Arkansas and came down to talk me out of it. I promised I would take Nick.”

Kris looked at Adam, “You are taking your publicist to my parent’s house? There isn’t enough room.”

“He is going to stay in a hotel. It is just in case something weird happens. You must admit sometimes strange things happen with us.”

Nick looked at them, “I would go so far as to say if it wasn’t for bad luck, neither one of you would have any luck at all.”

Adam hoped Kris would let it go. Kris seemed to think about and then looked up at Adam, “You really told Brad we were exclusive?”

“Yes. I meant everything I said to you.”

Kris smiled, “Good, because I am in love with you too.” Adam felt elated and hoped it wasn’t just the booze talking.


	35. Chapter 35

Calmness. Kris woke up with a pounding headache and a warm body next to him. After running his hands along the person, he knew it was Adam. He noticed he was wearing sweatpants and Adam had his boxer-briefs. Obviously, not a lucky night. The night start replaying in his mind and he cringed when he remembered calling Adam a slut. Kris was surprised Adam didn’t knock him out especially since he said he had been faithful. Although Kris didn’t know for sure, he decided he would take Adam at his word.

Kris continued to stare at Adam sleeping. He looked so angelic and fresh. Adam opened his eyes, “Your not planning my demise, are you?”

“No I was planning out my apology. I am sorry I called you a slut. I am not usually a jealous person.”

“Really? This isn’t the first time you called me a slut and went on a jealous tirade.”

Kris nodded, “I know it’s crazy. I never did that to Katy or anyone else. I don’t know why I go so insane when I think about you with another person. I think I just assume everyone else is feeling the same things I feel for you which means they want to ravage you.”

Adam laughed, “You are so full of shit. You don’t trust me, plain and simple.”

“I don’t trust Brad.”

“It takes two to tango. Unless, you think Brad is capable of overpowering me which is ridiculous. Besides, you are jealous about Nick too.”

“I know I am an insecure idiot but I am going to try and fix it.”

“Prove it by not freaking out next time.”

Kris ran his hand over Adam’s chest, “OK, how about I also make it up to you.” Kris’ throbbing headache was being replaced by his desire to have sex with Adam. When did I become a nympho? Kris had always liked sex but he was never ruled by it. Must be the Lambert factor. They spent the next hour fooling around and exploring each other’s bodies. Kris wished they could sleep in but they had promo-work. They got up and faced the day. Luckily the interviews were basic and no one asked personal questions.  
Kris was going to have Jade book Adam’s flight to Arkansas figuring he would pay for it since he invited Adam. As a piece offering, he told Adam he would buy Nick’s ticket and pay for his hotel.

“I invited you and I don’t blame you for being wary. I will pay for Nick or Nolan or both if you like. Besides, it might be good to have Nick there just in case Gina’s story comes out.”

“Thank you. Even though I am nervous, I am looking forward to meeting your family. Do you think they will like me?”

Kris didn’t want to set Adam’s expectations too high, “I don’t know. I am not sure if they really are embracing the idea of me being in a same sex relationship.”

“You think this is a set-up?”

Kris regretted his words when he hears the trepidation in Adam’s voice, “No, of course not but I think they may be awkward at first. They will like you as a person because you are charismatic and sweet. But, I must get my social gracelessness from somewhere and I am guessing it may be in the genes.”

The two concerts in San Diego went really well. Kris had Adam join him on stage for a duet as an encore. The audience seemed to enjoy it. They headed to Los Angeles. They would head to Arkansas before their LA shows which was why Adam had to change his plans with Brad. They would do some media events and fly out the next evening. Adam rode in Kris’ bus to LA. When they arrived at the hotel, Adam spoke to him as they waited for Nick and Jade to get their keys.

“Tonight, I am having dinner with some of my friends to include Brad. Do you want to go?”

Kris didn’t want to see Brad but he also didn’t want to leave Adam alone with him. If I go I will fuck it up and he will cancel his trip to Arkansas. Plus, I can prove I am not a psycho all the time. Taking the high road Kris responded,

“Actually, why don’t you just go and catch up with your friends. We will be joined at the hip in Arkansas and I don’t want you to get sick of me.”

“I would never get sick of you. I will probably stay out late.”

Kris nodded, “I trust you, Adam. I promise I won’t drink and make a scene if you come home really late. I know you like going out clubbing so go have a good time. I’ll be here when you get back. Take the extra key to my room in case you want to sleep there.” Kris didn’t care if he sounded pathetic.

Adam kissed him. “Thanks, baby.”

Jade came over and gave them each a set of keys, “You both are next door to each other.”

“Perfect,” Kris gave Adam one of his keys and then followed Jade to his room to get settled. Kris went to dinner with his band. He wanted to forewarn them about Gina and Scott. They ordered drinks and dinner. Kris decided to broach the subject of his blackmail,

“Gina tried to blackmail me and is going to do a tell all article with Scott. So I am probably going to be publicly outed.”

Cale got really angry, “What a bitch and Scott has a lot of nerve after what happened on the hiking trip. I guess he doesn’t feel that guilty for allowing Daniel’s buddies to try and rape Adam.”

Kris was shocked that Cale knew what had happened, “You know the details?”

“Dude, how many times do I have to explain there are no secrets on a tour. In fact, I think it is funny the great lengths you go to cover up what is obvious to the world. Besides, according to Tommy playing with a gay musician is a chick magnet. He gets all kinds of action since Adam’s groupies are hot and they realize he is unavailable.”

Kris laughed when he realized his band was really cool whether he came out or not. “For the record, I am bisexual not gay.”

“Like I said, play up the gayness, your groupies have tended to be too prudish. Adam’s seem to be…er… adventurous.”

“His groupies are older.”

Cale laughed, “Exactly most of yours are jailbait. Cougars would be better.”

Kris went back to the hotel and tried to watch TV. He was trying not to think about Adam out with his friends, Brad and probably a slew of beautiful men that wanted to fuck him. Kris purposely did not drink. Finally about midnight he fell asleep. He woke up hard and realized someone was licking his nipples. Kris looked down and saw black spiky hair.

“When did you get in?”

“About a second ago. I didn’t mean to wake you but…” Adam bit him on his nipple which made Kris jump and Adam giggle. Kris could tell Adam was drunk and he reeked of stale cigarettes, pot, booze and other people’s cologne. Kris made a face,

“You need to take a shower if you want to get in bed with me. I don’t feel like smelling Brad’s cologne all night.”

Adam froze, “I didn’t do anything with Brad. We danced a couple times that’s it.”

Kris noticed it was only two am which was probably very early for Adam. Since Kris was sober, he could reason that Brad probably intentionally hung all over Adam. For once he would not let Brad win.

“Knowing Brad, he probably sprayed you with his cologne when you weren’t looking. I didn’t say it to accuse you of anything. I knew you were out with him. I just want you to shower so I don’t have to choke on the smells of the club you were at when we fool around.”

Adam smiled. “OK, I’ll be right back.”

It seemed like Kris blinked and Adam was back freshly showered and very enthusiastic. A drunk!Adam was a horny!Adam. Adam was all hands and mouth. Kris didn’t mind being the focus of Adam’s attention. Unfortunately, the booze seemed to be interfering with his technique and he was more eager than usual. Kris took the lead in getting the condom on Adam and lubing him up Kris smirked as Adam seemed to be struggling with his coordination. Adam fell back against the bed,

“Fuck! I am too drunk. A little help here?”

Kris laughed, “How about I top this time? You are drunk, it won’t hurt too much.” Kris was only half asking since he knew Adam didn’t like to bottom. Adam seemed to think about it.

“Are you sure you know what you are doing?”

“No, but how hard can it be.”

“You’d be surprised. I’m too drunk to guide you but if it is something you want to try, we can do that. I don’t usually bottom but I will make exceptions for my hot boyfriend. How about for tonight we just stick to the basics before someone gets hurt.”

Kris laughed and fooled around with Adam keeping it simple with some mutual hand jobs. Unlike Kris, Adam was a very mellow drunk and incredibly affectionate. Adam insisted on telling Kris all about his fan-boy crush on him during American Idol and how he almost died when Kris answered the door the first time he went to massage him. Kris blushed at some of the things Adam said and hoped he didn’t remember his confessions. After hearing them, Kris fell just a little more in love with Adam and slept like a baby in his arms. His watch alarm woke him early and he quietly rose without waking Adam. Kris had an early morning interview at the radio station. On his way, he became nervous realizinf in a few hours they would be flying to Little Rock and confronting his family.

+++

Adam was relieved Kris let him go out with his friends without making a fuss. He really hoped he didn’t pull a Jekyll and Hyde. Adam met his friends in WeHo at one of his favorite restaurants. As a precaution, he asked Nolan to join him and Nick agreed to tag along. Nolan and Nick grabbed an adjacent table allowing Adam some privacy with his friends. Brad showed up and immediately went by Nick,

“Hi Porn-king, this must be your new boyfriend since we know what a sub you can be.”

“Hello, Brad, I would say it is good to see you but that would be a blatant lie. You obviously came to see Adam so run along and see him. Try not to make a scene tonight so I can relax and stay off the clock. For the record, this is Nolan, Adam’s body guard. Nolan, this is Brad, Adam’s…obnoxious ex.”

Adam did not want Brad making a scene so he pulled Brad over to his table. Adam had a good time with his friends but Brad kept purposely hanging on to him and flirting incessantly. After dinner they went to a dance club. They grabbed a table in the VIP section. Brad sat on Adam’s lap,

“You look gorgeous, rockstar. Tonight has been one of the best times I had in a long time. Speaking of which, where is your douche bag boyfriend? Was he too busy to sabotage your night?”

“He had alternative plans. Brad, don’t start and get off my lap because I don’t want any cell phone pictures of us posted on the net.”

Brad shrugged, “Sorry, you never use to be so prim and proper. But, then again you would think after the last few months, I would remember you are trying to climb in the closet.”

“I am not in the closet. I just don’t want any misleading photos surfacing and causing unnecessary fights between Kris and me.”

Brad grimaced, “Do you hear yourself? You are like an abused wife making excuses for a deadbeat. I am worried for you physically, emotionally and sexually. You are losing yourself and alienating your friends. It is unhealthy.” Brad seemed to take a dramatic pause, “I miss you so much, Adam. It’s really hard being apart after we were together so long.” Brad kissed his neck.

Give me a break. Adam knew Brad was fucking with this head to try and keep him from going to Arkansas. “Brad, you were my PA for like a month.”

Brad pouted which usually appealed to Adam but he was surprisingly immune. Brad spoke softly, “I’ve been so excited about you coming to see me and now you are going to Arkansas instead. I thought we would be friends forever but I guess it was just until you decided to fall for a douche bag.”

“I need to make my relationship with Kris a priority. I want to stay friends but we aren’t dating and I am tired of being alone.”

“Is that the problem? Because if so, we can date again.”

“I want more than just dating. I want to be in a committed relationship with someone.”

Brad rolled his eyes, “OK, fine I’ll take you back as a boyfriend.”

As if. Adam knew they would never work since Brad was a serial cheater. Adam laughed, “Brad, you would never stay faithful besides I am in love with Kris.”

Brad stood up, “He doesn’t deserve you, Adam. He is going to keep freaking out and hurting you. I am really scared this trip is going to implode. You are a bigger star than him now, move the fuck on.”

“Stop making a scene and sit down.” Adam waited until Brad sat in the chair next to him, “He is really trying. He is even paying for Nick to come with us when I told him my concerns. Nothing is going to happen.”

“I hope you are taking your bodyguard too. Are you going to dress conservatively to try and fit in with plaid country? That will be so cute when you become as fashionless as him. Just think how convenient it will be when you can travel with one pathetic outfit.”

Adam laughed at the look of horror on Brad’s face when he uttered those words, “First off, I could never be fashionless. Second, I am sure my attire will be the least of his family’s concerns.”

Adam just started talking about Brad’s show and Brad’s life. Luckily, Brad could never resist talking about himself and allowed the conversation to flow into less heated topics. Adam proceeded to get drunk which was not a good thing. Luckily, Nick intervened when Adam started to cave into Brad’s overtures. Adam had been grinding against Brad on the dance floor when Nick cut in. Adam proceeded to grind against Nick for a while. At around one thirty, Nick suggested they go back to the hotel. Adam was horny and realized he only wanted to be with Kris. Brad had tried to coax Adam to stay out longer but was unsuccessful once he remembered Kris was waiting for him. As soon as they got back to the hotel, he went straight to Kris room, praying he would welcome his presence. Kris was sound asleep and looking completely irresistible. Adam climbed in the bed and began to fondle him. Kris awoke and to Adam’s delight, seemed happy to see him. Thank God. Adam was far too drunk to deal with a freak out.

Adam awoke hungover and alone. He noticed Kris’ suitcases on the other bed and smiled that Kris had not kicked him out. He remembered Kris had early interviews and just went back to his room. Nick came in at eleven and told him he had an interview at noon, a meet and greet at two and then they would head to the airport for a five o’clock flight. Adam also learned Nolan was coming with them to Arkansas.

“If Jade asks, just tell her you insisted Nolan tag along. She is pissed about not going and I don’t want to have deal with it.”

Adam looked at Nick, “Are you actually asking me to bail you out of a tricky love situation?”

Nick winked, “This isn’t a love situation. I have been very up front with Jade but like most women she is being unreasonable. Don’t be a prick about this especially when I am going to fucking Arkansas instead of networking in LA.”

Adam smiled, “Think of it as a vacation.”

Nick guided Adam through his media events. The meet and greet ran long so they rushed to the airport. Adam had wanted to tone down but they were not able to go back to the hotel before hitting the airport. Adam went to the VIP lounge and saw Kris sitting playing with his phone. He looked up when they walked in,

“I was beginning to wonder. I thought you were going to change before the flight?”

Adam thought about Brad’s accusations that Kris would try to control his appearance and responded icily, “We ran out of time. Is there a problem?”

Kris looked at Adam and shrugged, “Not for me, I just thought you might be uncomfortable on the flight. I didn’t realize Nolan was coming too.”

“You said it was ok. I thought you bought his ticket. Why are you starting with me?”

Kris looked annoyed but then took a deep breath, “Maybe Jade bought it. Adam, I am not trying to pick a fight with you. I am happy you are coming with me.” Kris kissed Adam on the cheek.

Nick came over, “I just got a text from Jason, Gina’s article hit the streets and apparently she paints both of you in a really bad light.”

Kris nodded, “We knew she would.”

Nick was scrolling through an email on his blackberry and looked at Kris, “She claims everything about you is phony, your marriage to Katy was a sham, you bought Adam’s silence about your homosexuality and that you were planning to use him for publicity when your album tanked. She also says Adam had a boyfriend and you made him choose between him and a career. Of course, Adam being incredibly ambitious dumped his boyfriend to go on tour. She then says your outbursts are because Adam keeps going back to Brad and fucking me. Scott claims he was fired because Adam came on to him and other men on a hiking trip and you became jealous.”

Adam felt nauseous at the lies especially regarding the attempted rape he kept silent about. Plus, Adam worried Kris’ family would read the story and think he was a slut especially since their son keeps calling him one. Adam noticed Kris was also looking pale. Nick just shook his head, “Well, no real surprise there accept maybe the part about Katy. Actually, I was expecting worse.”

They boarded the plane. Kris was subdued. Adam sat next to him and held his hand under the blanket. Adam nodded off for a couple hours and woke with Kris’ head on his shoulder. The flight attendant came by with a cocktail,

“You two are really cute together.”

Adam stiffened, “We are just friends.”

She smiled, “Well you are cute friends. Can I get you anything else, Mr. Lambert?”

“No thanks.” Adam just sat awake wondering what kind of reception he would receive. The pilot came on and said they were starting their descent into Little Rock. Kris woke up and smiled at Adam self consciously as he sat up,

“Sorry about drooling on your shoulder. Are we almost there?”

“Twenty more minutes. Are we taking at taxi to your house?”

Kris laughed, “Nah, either Daniel or my father will pick us up.”

Adam started getting more nervous and it didn’t help seeing Kris fidgeting. Adam squeezed Kris’ hand,   
“We can totally just pretend we are only friends. Frankly, I am a little nervous facing your family as your boyfriend.”

Kris smiled sweetly at him, “We’ll play it by ear.”

They landed, got their bags and headed toward the baggage claim. Adam hoped Daniel picked them up. As soon as they exited the secured area, they were met by a few of Kris fans. It was obvious they were not expecting Adam but they seemed to accept it just fine. A couple obnoxious paparazzi asked if they were lovers and a slew of inappropriate questions. Luckily security kicked them out before they could take photos. Adam saw a sweet looking blonde lady and a friendly looking middle aged man headed their way. They immediately hugged Kris warmly and then turned to Adam. The woman spoke before Kris could introduce him.

“Welcome to Arkansas, Adam. We are so happy you came. I am Kim and this is my husband Neil.” Adam put out his hand and Neil shook it warmly and Kim kissed him on the cheek. Adam felt all the tension leave his system seeing the positive reception he received. Perhaps this was going to be a good trip after all.


	36. Chapter 36

Domestication. Kris was holding his breath as they exited the security doors of the main airport terminal. He immediately saw his mother’s smiling face and his father looking slightly more serious. Kris went over and was enveloped in their arms. Kris knew they had been worried with all the crazy events and negative press over the past year. Kris was overcome with emotion being home and was glad when his Mom took charge and introduced his father to Adam. Kris was nervous what his father really thought about Adam and them being together. Does he really know? Kris heard his father speaking,

“The media has been camped out at our house all day expecting you to come home.”

“Can you pull into the garage so they don’t see Adam?”

Kris felt his father stiffen, “Are you planning to keep his visit a secret? Because then you better plan on staying in the house the whole time. This isn’t Hollywood where stars walk around all the time.”

“We just don’t want any more bad publicity.”

Kris was surprised when Adam spoke, “Not we, you. I came here because you asked me if it’s going to be a problem I can go back to LA tonight.”

This trip was going downhill fast. “Adam-“

Nick came over and introduced himself and Nolan. “Hi, I am Adam’s publicist and this is his new body guard, Nolan. We came down just to make sure there were no problems from Gina’s story. We are going to be staying at the travel lodge in Conway. Is it OK if Adam rides with us and we follow you? We didn’t get a chance to talk on the flight.”

Neil Allen nodded, “Sure, I’ll give you the address and our phone number in case my driving throws you off.”

Kris was getting cold feet about the whole thing, “Maybe Adam and I should just stay in the hotel so you don’t have to deal with the media.” Kris felt instantly guilty when he saw Adam’s face fall.

“Kristopher Neil Allen, you must have lost your mind with all your traveling to even suggest you and Adam are not welcome in the house. You are being extremely rude to Adam and embarrassing me with your lack of southern hospitality. We already discussed this and we are not changing plans because of some idiot photographer hiding in our bushes. Now can we get a move on?”

Kris was blushing from getting scolded like a five year old in front of everyone. He noticed Nick was biting his lip to keep from laughing and Adam was just stunned. They left the airport. Kris had a feeling he was in for a long lecture on the car ride home.

He climbed in the back seat and his mother was back to being her friendly self,

“We switched out the bed in your room to a Queen so you and Adam can share a room,” Kris groaned. “We spoke to your Uncle Jack, you know he works in a hair salon and knows some gay men. He told us it was important we acknowledge your relationship with Adam and encourage you two to express yourselves. So if you want to hold his hand or show him some affection, we are ok with that.”

Kris was blushing from head to toe and just wished his mother would stop embarrassing him, “Mama, Adam and I are not affectionate in public. I am not really comfortable sharing a room with Adam in your house.”

“Well, I don’t expect you and him to…er…”

“-have loud sex?” Neil offered, “Son, do you care for Adam? I mean you seem to care enough to risk your career to be with him so why are you holding back? Kris you’re an adult now and capable of making your own life choices. I know your divorce was hard but Katy has moved on and so should you. If Adam is what you want then jump in 100% because your measured attempts seem to be falling flat and creating a worse case scenario. We only get one shot at life.”

“It is hard because I don’t think I am gay.”

“Son, we haven’t had the bird and the bees discussion in a long time and I am not an expert in homosexuality but it seems to me if you are sleeping with Adam, then you must be a little gay.”

Kris was stunned at his father’s words and then laughed at their simplicity, “I guess maybe a little.”

Mama Allen smiled, “Well, I am glad that is settled. So does Adam eat meat? I plan on making a roast tomorrow.”

Kris loved his parents and hoped Adam wasn’t too spooked by Kris’ earlier freak out. Hopefully, Nick was convincing Adam to stay at Kris house. Hopefully, Adam didn’t call Brad.

They arrived at the house at almost four in the morning. The Paparazzi had dwindled down to one, lone photographer that seemed less than half hearted with his mission. Adam arrived a half hour after Kris and they were taken straight to Kris’ room. His parents seemed exhausted and quickly left them alone. Adam seemed distant and tense. Kris wanted to relax him and tried to kiss him. Adam turned his head so Kris contacted his cheek,

“I am beyond exhausted and just want to go to sleep. I am a little angry but I don’t want to discuss it. Please let’s just sleep.”

Kris felt hurt but nodded, “Sure, do you want me to sleep on the floor?”

Adam laughed, “I am not that mad.” They climbed in the bed and Kris’ immediately fell asleep. He woke up at noon with Adam was still passed out next to him. Kris quietly got up and went downstairs. His mother was cooking up a storm,

“I invited the family over for a Sunday dinner and they are due to arrive at two. I need you to set up the dining room table.”

Kris dreaded the whole family coming over and wasn’t quite ready to deal with them. Being on shaky ground with Adam was not helping either. Kris helped his mother set up for the masses. Adam came down at one looking uncomfortable. Kim Allen smiled,

“Good morning, Adam. We are getting ready for company. I have fresh coffee and I can make you some toast.” His mother pulled Adam in the kitchen and told Kris to set the table. Kris just rolled his eyes and went about his task. A half hour later guests arrived. Kris was surprised how many of his cousins came. Kris asked his mother about it,

“Why are you having such a big dinner?”

“I am sorry but they all wanted to meet Adam. I told you he had devoted fans in this family.”

Kris cringed as his female relatives gushed and molested Adam. Kris’ Aunt was practically crossing the line when his mother pulled Adam to safety by asking he help her in the kitchen. Kris was going in to help but his mother said she wanted time alone with Adam. Kris was reluctant but his mother didn’t seem to be asking for his permission. Kris went back to talking to his relatives and waiting for dinner. About forty five minutes later they were all seated for dinner.

Kris’ family went from being star-struck to enamored with Adam. Kris was sitting back and really seeing how genuine and sweet Adam could be. He was not putting on his sexy fierce front but still had a flirtatious manner. Kris sat next to him and could feel Adam relax as the meal went on. Kris was careful to have only one beer. Adam was a little more indulgent but a buzzed Adam was a cute Adam.

After a long meal, a few hours of music, Kris pulled Adam upstairs. They were planning on getting up early to go fishing with his father. All things considered, the trip seemed to be going well. Adam went to the bathroom to take off his makeup and shower. Kris laid down waiting for Adam who came back flustered,

“I am glad we are sharing a room because your female relatives are aggressive. Your aunt just propositioned me and grabbed my ass.”

Kris laughed, “Sorry, you should be used to fanatical fans by now. You are just too irresistible.” Kris pulled Adam into the bed and started smothering him in kisses. Adam laughed and pinned Kris down on the mattress,

“I like your family. Do you think they like me?”

“I think they like you better than me. I am sorry I was a jerk at the airport.”

“It’s ok, you can make it up to me in the days to come.” Adam lowered himself so he was laying on top of Kris and started moving against him, “Can we have sex in your bed?”

“Let’s wait until we don’t have a house full of guests but if you can stay quiet, I’ll give you a blowjob.”

Adam’s eyes lit up, “I won’t make a beep.” Adam rolled on his back and grabbed a pillow. Kris smiled and hoped Adam stayed quiet but had a feeling he wouldn’t. Kris pulled Adam’s pajamas down. So beautiful and all mine. Kris started kissing Adam down his chest and abdomen. Adam was biting his lip to stay quiet. Kris held back a laugh knowing Adam loved talking through sex and making sexy noises. Licking down Adam’s length elicited a small moan,

“You have to stay quiet.” Kris was having fun pleasurably torturing Adam by circling his tongue around the head of Adam’s cock. Showing some mercy, Kris took him fully into his mouth. Kris had a feeling he wasn’t the best head giver but Adam seemed to like it well enough. Adam tried to thrust deeper in Kris but Kris held his hips steady and increased the speed.

“Kris, honey, Grand-” the door opened and his mother, aunt and grandmother were staring at them.

Kris was just looked at them frozen. Not again. His mother looked shocked, his grandmother looked confused and his aunt seemed to just be looking. The door shut and they heard his grandmother,

“That boy certainly is blessed.”

“Mama!” Kim admonished and then continued in a conspiratorial tone, “Kris and Adam are sort of together.”

“Kim, I may be old but I am not senile. I think everyone downstairs knows they are lovers. In the future, you should knock before walking in. Bring the boys by on Wednesday and I’ll make my famous crab cakes.”

They heard them walk downstairs. Kris stared at Adam and who just busted up laughing, “That was humiliating but at least you didn’t gag. Your grandmother is a hoot.”

“Well, she seemed to appreciate you.” Kris felt embarrassed but surprisingly ok. Although they successfully killed the mood, a sense of happiness permeated the room. Once again, Kris was learned the world doesn’t have to cave in because he was with a man.

+++

Adam reluctantly got in the car with Nick and Nolan.

“What a fucking jerk. He invites me here and then tries to back out of it.”

“Relax, cupcake, he mildly freaked out for a minute. Don’t make it worse by overreacting. He took you to meet his family cut him some slack. Regroup on the drive and remember to be polite to his family. Southerners hate rude people. On the upside, there was no gay bashing party at the airport.”

Adam was exhausted and just tried to relax on the drive over. When they arrived there were no paparazzi hanging about. Adam went in and was grateful for Kris’ mother’s warm reception and even happier to just go straight to bed. Adam woke up alone and just laid there looking around the room. He smiled seeing little glimpses into Kris’ childhood in pictures, trophies and mementos. Time to face the music. Adam quickly showered, dressed and put on light makeup. He went downstairs and learned the house was going to be overrun with Allens in less than an hour. Adam drank a cup of coffee while Kris busied himself with tasks assigned by his mother. He offered to help but Mrs. Allen insisted he was a guest.

A half hour later guest arrived and Adam was amazed at our many there were since his family was relatively small. Most were really friendly, some too friendly but none were scary. The booze was flowing and Adam found himself buzzed enough to agree to go fishing at 5 AM. At around ten, Kris guided him back to the bedroom and offered to give him a blowjob. This vacation was getting better by the minute.   
Well, up until Kim Allen interrupted his blowjob and Kris’ grandmother commented on his dick.

Kris and Adam just laughed and decided to go to bed. Adam felt someone shaking him way too early,

“Get up, baby, we have to be downstairs in ten minutes to go fishing.”

“I don’t wanna go.”

“Come on, you can sleep in the car.”

Adam really felt like shit. They went downstairs and Neil Allen was wide awake and chipper, “Come on boys, the fish aren’t sleeping. Grab those bags and let’s go.”

Adam was really regretting agreeing to this outing. He was pretty sure he wouldn’t get seasick but he wasn’t sure he would enjoy sitting out in the sun all morning. They drove about an hour to the boat launch area where they met up with three other guys. Adam was surrounded by plaid which made him nervous. He had been rushed and had just put on a t-shirt and jeans. No makeup and no hat. They went over by the other men who looked extremely conservative and very southern.

Neil seemed happy to see the men, “Adam, I’d like you to meet my old high school classmates. We’ve known each other for over thirty years. Keith, Bill and James, this is …

Kris spoke up, “My tour mate, Adam Lambert.”

Adam wasn’t expecting Kris to proclaim their love from the roof tops but that introduction definitely felt empty. Kris did not even acknowledge him as a friend instead he reduced him to a fucking colleague. Adam said hello to the men.

Bill gave Adam the once over, “You don’t get sea sick, do you boy?”

Adam was a little hungover so hated to commit either way, “Not usually.”

They just grunted and moved toward the boat. They loaded the boat and casted off. Adam imagined he could hear banjos in the background and worried Brad’s predictions would come true. Two hours into the trip, Adam was bored out of his mind and wishing he was anywhere but frying in the sun. Kris kept insisting he apply more sunscreen but it didn’t help when all he did was sweat it off. Adam wasn’t even paying attention when his line twitched. Great, figures my line would be the one the fish bites. Adam did not want to have to reel in a fish and certainly didn’t want to touch it. Worse yet, everyone started yelling directions at him. Adam was getting flustered and frustrated.

“Reel it in! Not too fast! Faster than that! Hurry up it is getting away! You are gonna lose it.”

The fish pulled hard and the pole slipped out of Adam’s hands and went flying into the lake. The boat was silent except for the splash of the pole impacting the water and the bubbles from it sinking. Adam turned to see the horrified and disgusted faces of the other passengers.

“Er…I guess it got away.”

Kris laughed and Keith mumbled something that sounded like “Amateur, city boy.”

As they all settled in again, it was obvious no one was willing to lend Adam another rod which made him happy. After about a half hour of the men talking sports Keith turned to Adam,

“So are you really a homosexual or is it part of your act? My daughter and her friends are huge fans of yours and if that is your image I think you are promoting an amoral lifestyle.”

Here we go. “Actually, I really am gay. I am not actively promoting anything but honesty.”

“Well, it goes against the bible and offends a lot of god fearing people. I personally don’t care what people do in their bedroom but I don’t appreciate people flaunting their sexuality.”

Adam was seething at his remarks and knew it would be smarter to bite his tongue. Taking a civil rights stance on a boat with strangers in the deep south would be foolhardy. Of course, Adam was a fool.

“I find ignorance and prejudice offensive. Why should I hide my sexuality because some people don’t like it? I am not ashamed of liking men and I don’t want to pretend I am something I am not.”

Keith shook his head and Bill added, “Well, you are getting a lot of negative press and I think it is hurting Kris career. Considering all the negative publicity Kris has been getting, you are lucky he is willing to hang out with you.”

Hang out with me! He is supposed to be my fucking boyfriend! Adam was ready to explode, “Yeah he is a real saint.”

Kris seemed to finally speak up albeit lamely, “I don’t think Adam being gay is hurting him or me.”

“Of course it is because people are thinking you are gay. I saw pictures people photo shopped of you kissing Adam. Since you are divorced now, you need to be careful. People might start believing you are homosexual.”

Kris looked down and Neil spoke up, “Bill, they are musicians not politicians. I don’t think they are required to promote any particular lifestyle choices.”

Keith jumped in, “Neil, they are famous and that makes them role models. Young people admire them and that makes them responsible. You can’t tell me it doesn’t bother you that everyone is thinking your son is a fag. No offense, Adam.”

Adam hated the fact he couldn’t walk away. He would have jumped over board and swam but he wasn’t sure if there were alligators in the water.

“I accept my son for who he is and I really don’t care what other people think.”

Kris spoke up, “Can we just talk about something else?”

Adam just glared at Kris. Neil put a hand on Adam’s shoulder, “I think the fish aren’t biting anyway, why don’t we cruise around so Adam can see some of the beauty of our state.”

They cruised around in a tense silence and then came ashore. Neil said goodbye to his friends. Adam was pissed at Kris. They got in the car,

“Neil, thank you for taking me fishing. Would you mind dropping me off at the hotel? I need to meet with my publicist.”

Kris stared at Adam, “Since when?”

“Since you decided to be a dick and pretend I was just a tour mate.”

Kris seemed to get mad back, “What did you expect me to say. I didn’t want to offend my father’s friends. Not everything needs to be a civil rights statement. You are being very immature.”

Adam felt like punching Kris, “Exactly which is why I think I should go back to LA. This trip is not working.”

“That is great, Adam. Whenever things don’t go your way, you run back to your ex or are you just going to sleep with Nick since he is here?”

Neil slammed on the brakes, “Aside from the fact, this is a discussion that should not be had in front of me. I do not like what I am hearing.”

Kris spoke up, “I am sorry, Dad, Adam doesn’t have a filter.”

Adam wanted to scream. I don’t have a filter? If that wasn’t the pot calling the kettle black!

Neil looked at Kris, “Well, he certainly has a lot of self control because frankly I would have knocked you out if I was him. You have been incredibly rude, you have treated him like he dirt and now you are blaming him for your shortcomings. Frankly, based on what I saw today, I don’t see why he is even with you. If you can’t even introduce him as your lover to people you have known all your life, how are you going to deal with the rest of the world?”

“I didn’t want to embarrass you with your friends.”

“I am not embarrassed by you being with Adam. If I was, I wouldn’t have invited you both today. You didn’t inherit your hypocrisy from me.”

Adam felt bad Kris was getting yelled out because of him. “It is ok, Neil, Kris isn’t ready to come out.”

“No, it is not OK. If he isn’t ready, then he needs to give you up. Katy told us how Kris treated you and I didn’t believe he was capable of being so callous but after today I believe it. Frankly, I don’t see how the two of you can ever work out.”

Adam felt what was left of his heart breaking. He looked at Kris and saw the torment in his eyes, as well. Kris spoke up, “We have to work out. I don’t think I can give him up.”

Spoken like the true psycho Adam was coming to recognize as the real Kris Allen. Nothing would ever really change and Adam knew he deserved more. Neil Allen was right, their relationship was doomed from the start, “You don’t have a choice because I can’t do this anymore. It is demeaning and unhealthy. You are not ready to come out and I am not prepared to go in the closet. I love you and wish things could be different but we don’t seem to be able to work things out. I am going to pack my stuff, go to the hotel tonight and fly out in the morning.”


	37. Chapter 37

Lonesome. After Adam’s announcement that he would be going back to LA, the car ride was silent. Kris wanted to scream, beg and plead but he held back. Adam deserved more and should be with someone that treated him like a king instead of a dirty whore. Kris wished he was that person but he kept screwing up. They were going past the hotel and Adam asked to be dropped off.

“I’ll just send Nolan by to pick up my stuff. Neil, thank you so much for everything and please thank Kim for me. I’m sorry I cannot stay. ”

“Adam it was a pleasure. Good luck to you.”

Kris looked at Adam he was biting his lip not to break down. Adam just nodded and got out of the car. Neil started driving and Kris felt empty and depressed. Neil looked over and Kris saw the sympathy in his eyes,

“How are you doing, son?”

“I’m OK. This isn’t the trip I envisioned.”

“I am sure Adam is thinking the same thing. You need to figure how what is important to you. I’m sure there will be people that don’t accept it but most people will. Even Keith, he will probably never understand but he isn’t going to stop being a friend to the family over it. Other people don’t have to validate your life. How does Adam handle the negativity?”

Kris thought for a minute, “I never asked him. He seems to just ignore it and look to his gay friends or ex-boyfriends for support.”

Neil smiled, “Why don’t you try doing the same?”

“I don’t have any gay friends.”

“You have Adam and I am sure he would share a few of his friends.”

“What about my career?”

Neil pulled into the driveway of their house and turned off the engine, “When you first starting playing music it was so beautiful and raw. You could express yourself perfectly in your songs and you came across so genuine. I didn’t see any of that in your last album. You are going through the motions because you are singing about things you think people want to hear. I’m not sure that is so worth saving. I think after this tour maybe you should take a break and figure yourself out.”

Kris broke down crying and hugged his Dad, “I am so lost.”

“Don’t worry, you will find your way.”

Kris’ Mom was disappointed that Adam left but didn’t say too much about it. The rest of the trip was subdued. Kris googled Adam and saw an article claiming he was partying at some LA clubs and had a picture of him with his arm around Nick. That hurt but at least it wasn’t Brad. Kris returned to LA. Adam was cordial but actively avoided him. Kris just gave Adam space. He had a meeting with the label and they asked if he wanted to extend the tour to Europe.

“No, as soon as we are done with this I am taking a break.”

“Your album hasn’t sold very well maybe it will do better in Europe.”

“I doubt it because it is a lousy album. I don’t want to promote it. I want to take some time and maybe write new music.”

Rick was in the meeting, “Your album sold enough to cover the costs of recording it. I think a hiatus is a good idea if it means you writing good songs again.”

“No promises but I want to try.”

The next month on the tour, Adam was kept busy with promotional events and Kris barely even saw him. Kris was in a deep depression but refused to compound it with booze. He mostly just lost himself in books and movies. He tried not too obsess over Adam or be mean to Nick. Jade and Nick’s romance had faded when Nick refused to give up men. Jade said he was sleeping with a guy on the tour which Kris knew must be Adam. That really hurt. Kris just pulled back from everyone more and became a loner.

The last concert was in Vancouver and the show went well. Kris could not avoid the after party since it was in honor of all the support crew. Against his better judgment he decided to drink at this gala. Four tequila shots later he approached Adam who was sitting very close to Nick.

“You two make a beautiful couple.”

Adam rolled his eyes, “You are drunk, aren’t you? I knew ending this tour without drama was a bridge too far. What do you want Kris?”

Kris just looked at Adam, “You.”

Adam blinked a few times and then became angry, “Fuck you. Why don’t you just go bother a cute girl? Isn’t it getting a little old fucking with my head and trampling on my heart? Or maybe you should wait a little longer for me to put it back together first and then you can have the pleasure of breaking it again.”

Kris was too drunk to have any pride left, “I am sorry and I know I shouldn’t ask but…can we…just for tonight. I’m lonely.”

Adam just shook his head, “You are a rockstar, go pick up a groupie. As tempting as your offer is, I have moved on and so should you.” Adam put his hand on Nick’s leg. Nick had been chatting with Nolan and just looked over at Adam before resuming his conversation with Nolan. Kris noticed he didn’t push Adam’s hand away.

Kris just nodded.

“Aren’t you going to go off on me for being a slut? Make a scene?”

Kris shook his head, “Actually, I’ll probably just go home, wallow in some self pity and then jerk off to a memory of us together.” Shit, did he just say that pathetic spiel out loud? Judging by the pitying looks he was receiving from Adam, Nick and Nolan, he assumed he not only said it out loud but at a fairly high volume. Humiliating!

Kris just shifted, “Have a good night and a nice life.” Kris all but ran a way. He found Jake and asked him to take him back to the hotel. Kris went in his room after assuring Jake he would not drink anymore or hurt himself. Kris was actually quickly sobering up and massively regretting approaching Adam. He just laid down and cried. He was about to drift off when he heard a knock at his door. He opened it half hoping it was an axe murderer but instead saw the last person he expected.

“I thought I’d come by and lend a hand.”

+++

Adam was proud of himself for not breaking down during the tense ride to Nick’s hotel. He went into the lobby and straight up to Nick and Nolan’s room. He hoped they were in since it was almost dinner time. He banged on the door and Nolan answered,

“Hi Adam, I thought you were spending the day fishing.”

“Yeah, look change of plans. I need to stay here tonight and I want to go back to LA tomorrow. Can I come in?” Nolan nodded and moved aside to let Adam in. The shower was running so Adam assumed Nick was showering. Adam noticed the condom wrappers in the trash can and looked at Nolan.

“Is this a bad time?”

“Timing is perfect. Nick is just showering before dinner.”

Adam sat down at the small table while Nolan flipped through the channels. Nick came out stark naked and took a double take of Adam sitting on one of the beds. Adam couldn’t stop himself from staring boldly at Nick since the guy was beautiful.

“Cupcake? Why aren’t you with your boyfriend?” Nick slid on a pair of jeans. His commando state was going to be a continued distraction. At least he would be obsessing about something other than his doomed love life.

“I dumped him. He is never going to treat me better than a dirty secret and I want more.”

“I thought his parents knew and this was a sort of coming out.”

“They do and they were great about it. However, it became painfully obvious every time we meet someone else he runs back into the closet and acts like a prick about it. His own father thought I was a loser for sticking around. Besides, I don’t want to talk about it since you give shitty love advice. You should have told me to stay away from him.”

“Like you would have listened. Anyhow, I’ll change our flights. In the meantime, I am starving lets go get some unhealthy southern food.”

They went to dinner and spoke about everything that wasn’t Kris Allen. Adam drank quite a bit and convinced Nick to drink with him. Adam had a feeling he was the more inebriated of the two. They went back to the hotel after dinner since Nick had booked them on a flight the next morning.

Nolan offered to get Adam another room, “Adam, do you want me to get you a room they aren’t booked.”

Adam knew the correct answer was yes but he didn’t want to be alone, “Nah, I’ll just stay with you guys unless…”

Nick and Nolan looked at each other and Nick spoke, “That’s fine, cupcake.” Adam noticed Nolan glare at Nick. Adam was annoyed, “Nick, have you ever heard the phrase about not shitting where you sleep?”

“I am going to ignore that question because it is so hypocritical. You couldn’t possibly be calling me out on my personal affairs.”

“Actually, I am because you were the one that claimed you don’t mix business with pleasure. Yet, you are sleeping with two people on the tour.”

Nick looked at Adam with a pissed off expression, “Fuck you. I understand you are upset about Kris but you are crossing the line. Besides, I ended things with Jade so technically I am still only sleeping with one person.”

Adam was mostly mad because he really wanted to have sex. He was hurting bad and really needed to get his mind off his pain. He decided his tactic was not achieving the goal, “You still seem to be ignoring your own rules. How about relaxing them for me too?”

Adam realized the extent of his mistake when Nolan spoke up,

“Did you just proposition Nick?”

Adam shifted as he looked at the 230 pound of muscle questioning him in an angry tone. “I…I kinda-sorta did, I guess. I’m sorry that was rude of me. I’m just really upset and it would have made me feel better to be with someone.”

Nolan’s expression softened, “I’m OK if Nick wants to help you a little.”

Adam felt like he was hearing casino bells. It had been a shitty day but a chance to get deep throated would certainly make it better. Adam turned to Nick eagerly but then felt crushed as he saw Nick’s “are you for kidding?” expression.

Nick turned to Nolan, “Have you lost your freaking mind?”

“The guy just lost the love of his life and he is depressed. The least you can do is give him a harmless handjob and some hugs.”

Blowjob, blowjob, blowjob! Adam was getting hopeful again.

Nolan continued, “Consider it a request from me.”

Nick laughed, “First off, I don’t appreciate you trying to pimp me out and that seems to happen a lot on this tour. Second, the fetishes I have in bed doesn’t really apply outside the bedroom. You don’t get to try and ‘request things’ all the time. Third, as hot as this seems I am still sober enough to know it is a bad idea.”

“We can drink more,” Adam offered.

Nick laughed and ruffled Adam’s hair, “How about I just lay down with you and innocently comfort you until you fall asleep?”

Pathetic consolation prize, “I’d rather have a blowjob.”

“Well, we got another month to the tour maybe you’ll get a chance to get me drunk enough to override my better judgment.”

Adam laid down with Nick and actually found himself falling asleep in the beautiful man’s arms. Adam was disappointed but knew Nick had probably done them both a favor. Still, once again he missed the opportunity to get deep throated. Life could be cruel.

They returned to LA and thankfully Brad didn’t react to Adam’s news of breaking up with Kris. Brad was happy Adam was safe and truly seemed sympathetic to Adam’s sadness. Even more surprising he didn’t take advantage of Adam’s vulnerability. Either Brad was into his latest beau or Nick had either threatened or bribed him to be good. Adam guessed it was the latter.

Adam avoided Kris when he returned and found himself extremely busy for the rest of the tour. Either his fame had reached new heights or Nick was ensuring Adam had no time to breathe or dwell on his loss. Adam was grateful for his busy schedule but also how well he got along with Nick and Nolan. Unfortunately, Nick never became drunk enough to not cross the line and Adam didn’t push too hard. In fact, Adam had been celibate since his break up with Kris which was unusual and probably contributing to his restlessness. The last night of the tour, there was a wrap up party to thank the support staff and everyone had to go.

Adam was caught off guard when Kris approached him. The two had successfully avoided each other socially since the fishing trip. Adam tensed up when he noticed Kris was drunk. A drunk Kris, was an obnoxious Kris and usually resulted in a scene. Not caring if he fueled the fire, Adam put his hand on Nick’s leg possessively hoping neither Nick nor Nolan punched him out. Kris immediately reacted but then seemed to grow melancholy and propositioned Adam. Still being geared up for battle, Adam shot him down and watched Kris walk away broken. Adam instantly regretted the way he handled the situation. Nick kissed Adam on the cheek and whispered in his ear,

“He’ll be fine. Stay your ground and just enjoy the party.”

Adam accepted another martini and just hung out. He could not dismiss the image of Kris sad eyes or his confession of being lonely. Adam told Nick and Nolan he was tired and wanted to go back to the hotel. Adam pretended to sleep on the way back to the hotel to avoid any “advice”. Adam said goodnight and ruefully watched Nick go into Nolan’s room. Adam fully intended to go to bed but found himself knocking on Kris’ door. The door opened to a stunned Kris.

“I thought I’d come by and lend a hand.” Adam stood waiting for Kris to react. A couple seconds later Kris pulled him in the room and seemed glad Adam came by. Adam threw all caution to the wind, forgot his pride and basically let his dick take over. He kissed Kris, who in turn, basically attacked him. Apparently, Kris was as worked up as him. Adam tensed for a moment as he remembered why he dumped Kris but quickly dismissed the thought as Kris stroked his hardness. Letting out a soft moan, Adam maneuvered Kris to the bed. Life felt right again. Adam went to prepare Kris and was caught off guard when he blocked his hand. OK, maybe just keep it light. Adam ran his hands over Kris’ erection and noticed Kris wasn’t still kissing him.

“Adam, we need to stop. This isn’t right. You deserve better.”

No, no, no! “I’m ok with this really. Don’t be a cocktease.”

Kris sat up and pushed Adam off him. “Seriously, you were right to dump my ass. I love you and I want us to work. We can’t keep making the same mistakes and expecting things to be different. I want to prove myself to you.”

“You can start fresh tomorrow? I think we should go with this tonight.” Adam was tried to kiss a non-compliant Kris which didn’t seem to work. Adam became frustrated and hurt. Kris was driving him crazy, “Fine, you don’t want me! I’ll go find someone that does.”

“Don’t be like that. I am doing this for us.”

“No, as usual you are doing it for you. You are right though because I keep making the same mistake of going to you and expecting a better outcome. Goodbye Kris.” Adam grabbed his clothes and walked out still dressing. Luckily, the hallway was empty. Adam found himself outside Nick’s room hoping he was in there. He needed someone. He banged on the door. Nick answered half asleep in a pair of low slung sweat pants.

“Are you alone?”

“Yeah. What’s wrong?”

Adam ignored the warning bells going off in his head. He pushed his way in while grabbing Nick behind the neck and kissing him. Nick pulled back,

“Adam-“

Adam was buzzed, hurt, angry and frustrated beyond reason. He grabbed Nick harder, kissing him forcefully until he had him up against the wall. Adam could feel Nick hardening. Adam ran his hand over Nick’s chest and squeezed his nipple hard which elicited a small moan from Nick.

“Fuck, this is a bad idea.” Undermining his words, Nick threw his head back submissively and pushed his hips against Adam. Maybe the night would be salvageable.


	38. Chapter 38

Reprieve. Kris knew Adam was pissed and frustrated with his schizophrenic behavior. Kris just couldn’t make love to Adam and then hurt him again with his cowardice. Kris needed to figure himself out before he could be an effective partner and he didn’t want to be just another ex Adam still slept with. Brad already filled that role. Unable to sleep, Kris tossed and turned a few hours until it was time to leave for Los Angeles. The last tour venue had been in Portland so they were all flying back to LA before everyone disbanded. Kris hoped to get a chance to apologize to Adam for giving mixed signals and explain he needed some time to find himself.

Kris knocked on Adam’s door at ten the next morning. He was surprised when no one answered. Kris went to Nick’s room to see if Adam and his group had already left fro the airport. Kris knocked and waited a few minutes until Nick answered the door in boxers.

Kris noticed Nick became a little flustered, “Kris, what’s up?”

“Do you know where Adam is? He isn’t in his room.”

“Er…actually…” Kris felt is heart sink as he looked over Nick’s shoulder and saw raven hair poking out of the covers. As usual, Adam had sought solace from the hot men around him. Kris was not surprised but a little taken aback. He fought to quell the anger rising in him and the jealousy he was experiencing. Kris just resigned himself to the fact that he and Adam would never be on the same page but still felt the need to question Nick,

“Well, I guess I found him. I thought you were with Nolan?”

“This looks a lot worse than it is.” Kris heard someone come up behind him and it was Nolan. It became obvious Nolan had not been consulted about the new sleeping arrangement.

“Who the fuck is in your bed? I didn’t realize when you said headache you meant you had a better offer from the boss.”

“Easy now, I did have a headache.”

Nolan was seething and Kris was hurting. Adam seemed to wakeup from the activity and sat up confused. He looked over by the door and just pulled the covers over his head. Nick turned to Nolan and Kris,

“How about we discuss this later? I need to get Adam up and ready to go. We all have to catch a flight at noon today.”

Nolan stood there, “Did you fuck him?”

Nick became annoyed, “I don’t recall entering into a monogamous relationship with you so it is none of your business.”

That was definitely not a no. Kris was crushed that Adam left him for Nick. Sure, he didn’t put out but still it was harsh. Worse yet, Adam had literally buried his head instead of dealing with the situation. He obviously was over Kris. Downheartedly, Kris walked away and finished getting ready for to leave. He went to the hotel lobby to meet everyone to ride to the airport. Tensions seemed to be running high among the group. Both Jade and Nolan were giving Nick dirty looks and Adam seemed to be tuning the world out. He and Nick were sitting together each talking on their cell phone. Kris’ band showed up and they too were giving Adam dirty looks. Cale came over and smiled,

“How are you doing? Glad the tour is over?”

“Yeah, I am going to be taking a hiatus for a while. Probably a few months at least so its cool if you all want to do your own projects.”

Cale seemed to hesitate, “You sure you are OK? I heard Adam cheated on you.”

Kris decided to take the high road for once, “He didn’t cheat on me. We were broken up and he decided to be with someone else. We barely spoke the last month of the tour.”

“I know but I thought you guys made up last night.”

“Well, we didn’t. Adam is a good guy and I don’t want you all treating him differently because of me.”

Kris just zoned out and tried to ignore any drama going on around him. They arrived at the airport and boarded the plan. Kris sat next to Jade who was seething. He realized his bad seat choice too late.

Jade unable to contain herself spoke, “They are both sluts and a relationship between them will never work out. I hope they both fall for each other and then break each other’s hearts. After everything you did for Adam, this is how he repays you. You deserve better.”

Kris looked at Jade, “What did I do for him?”

“You gave him a career and you propelled him to stardom. He used you.”

Kris laughed, “Adam has a career because he is talented and probably has it more in spite of me rather than because of me. I am sorry you and Nick didn’t work out but Adam and I broke up because of me as much as him. Actually, I am pretty sure it is more my fault.”

Kris looked over by Adam and focused on suppressing the anger he felt watching him sitting with Nick. There was an obvious intimacy about them. Kris noticed Nolan was seething as much as he was if not more. Jason came over and Jade kindly offered him her seat. Jason sat down,

“How is it going? There are going to be a lot of paparazzi at the airport so I want to make sure you have your emotions in check. I heard from Jade that Nick and Adam hooked up. I know it doesn’t feel like it but it’s a blessing in disguise that he showed his true colors before you “came out”.”

Kris just nodded numbly. Jason paused and looked at Kris with blatant pity, “Nick turned out to be a real piece of work. He broke Jade’s heart, slept with Adam’s bodyguard and then slept with Adam. He is really an asshole and I am going to talk to Rick about this.”

Even though Kris hated Nick at the moment he didn’t want to ruin his career, “Jason, just leave it alone. The tour is over so it’s none of our concern. If Adam wants to be with Nick, that is their business.”

Jason did not seem satisfied with Kris’s response and stormed over to Nick and Adam,

“You have no ethics when it comes to your job or your life. When we get back, I am going to tell Rick all about your escapades.”

“How old are you 12? Save your breath though because I planned to resign when we got back anyway.”

Adam seemed shocked, “What! You can’t quit. You said we were cool.”

Nick smiled and patted Adam’s thigh, “We are cool but Jason is right it is not professional to mix business with pleasure. In all truth, I planned on resigning after the tour regardless. For the last month, I’ve been in talks with E network to host a celebrity gossip show and it looks like they are going to put a palpable deal on the table. Don’t worry cupcake, I won’t use anything against you.”

Jason seemed to stress out, “Are you going to use anything against Kris?”

Nick looked at Kris, “Nothing from the past and I do not plan on discussing Kradam. However, the future is another story. Going forward once I get this gig, everyone is open game, even Adam.”

Adam took offense, “Hey! If you try and make an ass out of me, I will convince Brad you were secretly pining for him and he should pursue you with a vengeance.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

Jade decided to take that moment to unleash, “So basically you used Adam to get back into journalism and then slept with him to get out of being his publicist. Or have you simply run out of people to sleep with in the music business? You knew Adam and Kris were together and Adam has no self control.”

Kris was upset but still liked Nick, “Adam and I were no longer together so he did not have to exercise any self control. The tour is over so let’s just leave things be and get back to LA.”

Adam looked at Kris sadly and just started reading a magazine again like he could care less. Kris too just returned to his seat but unfortunately he did still care. He cared enough to try and work on himself and figure things out.

+++

Nick really was beautiful and sexy. Adam continued to kiss and bite his neck. It was clear Nick responded to aggression. Given his frustration with Kris’ games, Adam was on board with it too. Adam bit Nick’s neck and sucked on the soft flesh. Nick pushed into him again but then pulled back,

“I really don’t think this is a good idea, cupcake.”

“I really don’t give a damn whether it is or isn’t. I also don’t need another cock tease right now.” Adam pushed Nick up against the wall roughly, “Are you back on board?” Adam pressed on Nick’s crotch with the heel of his free hand which caused Nick to moan.

“Yeah, but for the record this is a really bad idea and was yours not mine.”

“Noted. Can you…” Nick was already down on his knees before Adam could finish his request. Yes, this night is definitely improving. Adam watched as Nick opened his pants and proceeded to take him in his mouth. Adam felt his legs weaken as his whole cock disappeared into Nick’s mouth. Fucking incredible. Nick was definitely talented and clearly experienced. Adam moaned as he enjoyed one of the best blow jobs of his life. He was definitely more skilled than Kris but Adam couldn’t help wishing he was looking down and seeing Kris. Stupid thoughts.

Adam focused on enjoying his fantasy of being deep throated come true. The pleasure stopped as Nick stood up pulling Adam toward the bed. He followed willingly and pushed Nick down on the bed once they were near it. Adam liked how Nick did not hesitate or resist.

“So how far are you willing to go, Nick?”

“I usually go all the way if it looks to be a good ride and you certainly show promise, big boy.”

Adam laughed and Nick smiled. Sweet, a green light. Adam felt a little pressure to perform well since Nick was a former porn star. He also wished he would have seen the pornos so he could have had a preview of his competition. Adam starting stroking Nick’s cock and then placed one finger in him. Nick seemed impatient,

“Save the fancy foreplay for your other lovers. Grab the lube from the drawer and go for the gold, cupcake.”

Adam felt like he died and went to heaven. He grabbed the lube and condoms from the drawer. Unfortunately, he couldn’t rid himself of the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. God damn you, Kris Allen! Nick must have noticed his hesitation,

“Did I just throw your game off? You OK, cupcake?”

“Don’t call me cupcake when I am trying to have sex unless you really want me to fail.”

Nick flipped them over which reminded Adam that Nick was actually stronger than him and more muscular. “I don’t want you to fail, sexpot. I’ll try and get you back in the mood.” Nick grabbed the lube and poured a bunch in his hands. He kissed Adam while expertly stroking his semi-hard cock. Again, Adam admired Nick’s skill but the emotional connection was absent. He liked Nick a lot and thought he was sexy but they weren’t at this level yet. Truth be told Adam never really liked casual sex which is why he kept going back to ex-boyfriends for sex.

Adam hated to pull a Kris Allen but he couldn’t keep going. He stopped Nick,

“I am sorry but I can’t do this. I am still hung up on Kris.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, now you get a conscience?” Nick climbed off Adam and laid down next to him.

“I’m sorry but I am still in love with Kris. I can’t-”

Nick interrupted him, “Adam, I really care about you but I don’t feel like listening to you pour out your heart. If you are not going to put out than at least let me sleep in peace.”

Adam didn’t want Nick mad at him, “Do you want me to give you a hand job?”

Nick laughed, “Don’t worry about it. Look I want to sleep. If you don’t want to be alone you can stay here but shut up and sleep.”

Adam didn’t want to be alone. “Ok, goodnight, Nick.” Adam moved closer to him.

“No cuddling either. I already have a case of blue balls. Goodnight, cupcake.”

Ignoring Nick’s warning, Adam still moved against him and went to sleep. He woke up to voices and opened his eyes to see Kris and Nolan in hallway. Rather than deal with a fucked up situation, Adam pulled the covers over is head and went back to sleep. Nick woke him up a few minutes later.

“You can get up now everyone left. I don’t think the love of your life was too happy seeing you in my bed. Not too mention, I doubt Nolan would take a bullet for you at the moment.”

“Shit, this is fucked up. You should have sent me back to my room last night.”

Nick just stared at Adam, “Your right. Actually, I should have never let you in but you exploited the kink in my armor.”

Adam laughed, “Literally. I’m sorry I came on to you last night. For the record, that was one of the most amazing blowjobs I ever experienced.”

Nick winked, “I am an even better lay.”

Adam winked back, “I don’t doubt it. Maybe when I get over Kris…”

“I’m already in my late thirties, I don’t think anything will work by the time you do that.”

“So are we cool?”

“No harm, no foul. We are cool. Now go get packed and be in the lobby in a half hour.”

Adam went back to his room and met the group in the lobby. Adam did not know what to say to Kris so he just ignored him. He glanced at him secretly but each time it hurt to see him so closed off. Adam also noticed the tension in the group. He had a feeling Nolan had blabbed or Kris had. Nolan was treating him coldly. Adam would let it go for a day but if he kept up the attitude, Adam would just fire his ass. Surely, there must be some perks to be a rockstar.

Adam watched as Jason came over by he and Nick. He proceeded to lay into Nick and Adam was freaked out to hear Nick was leaving him. Adam was happy he was getting a shot at his own career but said he was going. After Jason walked away Adam questioned Nick,

“Are you really getting an offer from E network?”

“Yes, I had been talking to them for a while but I was insisting that I be allowed to write my own material and reserve the right to refuse reporting certain stories. I really don’t want to become some tasteless host cashing in on other people’s misfortune. I think they are finally willing to negotiate my terms. Ironically, the pornos helped.”

“I am happy for you. Will you keep in touch? Do I get a rain check for last night?”

“I will keep in touch especially since you are becoming an A-lister. No, you don’t get a rain check until I am sure you will follow through.”

“Fair enough.”

Adam was looking forward to be back in LA and calling Brad. He needed to get Kris out of his system only he had a feeling it was like a chronic sickness and he would never fully recover. He looked over at Kris and caught him staring like a wounded puppy. Adam went over like he was hypnotized.

“I am sorry about this morning.”

Kris smiled, “I am sorry about last night. I really care for you, Adam, but I need some time to find myself.”

“How long?”

“I don’t know but I don’t expect you to wait or live like a monk while I get my head out of my ass.”

Adam laughed at Kris’ words. “I hope you don’t take too long because you kind of ruined me for other people. I didn’t sleep with Nick?”

Kris looked up, “Not that it is my business but nothing happened?”

Adam considered lying but went with honesty, “I went to his room to fool around. I was frustrated and angry. I kissed him and let him blow me for a bit but than I thought about you and stopped him.”

Kris nodded and Adam could tell he was upset, “Oh.”

“I am an asshole and can’t even tell you why I did it. I am sorry.”

Kris looked at Adam, “You did it because I couldn’t step up to the plate and even acknowledge you to my father’s friends, I treated you badly, came on to you in desperation and then rejected you for responding. I’d say you might have some justification. We both seem to always be at odds. Maybe we need couples therapy.”

Adam laughed, “Are you willing to see a couple’s therapist with me?”

“Maybe. I think we need to step back and figure out what we want. I think we need some distance to be objective. I am going to go abroad for a few months and just find myself. You need to focus on becoming an iconic pop-star. Can you give me six months?”

Adam felt like Kris was asking for five lifetimes but in all fairness six months was not unreasonable. Adam was booked for at least four months making videos promoting his album internationally and other time intensive events Nick had mentioned. Plus, it appears he has to find all new staff.

“I can wait if it means things will be better between us. Will you keep in touch?”

“Of course.”

Five months later, Adam had only spoken to Kris a handful of times and had only about fifteen emails from him. To be fair, Adam was busy traveling and promoting all over Europe and Asia. Nick stayed on as his publicist for a couple months but then started guest hosting entertainment tonight and then was given his own show on E network which did well. Adam hired a new publicist and PA. Nolan got over him fooling around with Nick and stayed on as his bodyguard.

Adam was reading the tabloids and smiled as he read all the celebrity hookups he supposedly had and noticed there was a blurb on Kris. Kris had successfully managed to drop off everyone’s radar and was living back in Arkansas. Adam missed him and was happy just to read a little something.

“Sources say Kris Allen is back in the studio recording a series of romantic songs lamenting a lost love. Someone close to the Allen family says he has been seeing his ex-wife and perhaps the two are considering reconciling their differences.”

Adam felt the ground fall out from under him as he stared at a picture of the couple in question sitting together at a restaurant. Perhaps, Kris found himself after all. Unfortunately, that appeared to be a straight, conservative man pursuing his ex-wife. Adam felt pathetic for pining all these months as Kris patched up his love life with someone else! Fuck!


	39. Chapter 39

Recharge. After arriving in LA, Kris said goodbye to Adam and hoped they stayed in touch. Kris wanted time to figure himself out and become comfortable in his own skin. He was pretty sure the life he wanted would include Adam but in what capacity was the question-colleague, friend, lover or life partner? Would Adam wait for him to figure it out? Kris wasn’t sure but he knew he couldn’t keep acting crazy. Kris met with Jason and the label and made it clear he was taking a break and going away for a while. The label was so fed up with his dismal album sales they were willing to let him take an indefinite break. Rick was in the meeting and sarcastically added,

“Ironic that you are taking a hiatus from a tanking career and your buddy Adam can’t seem to shine brighter. Nick has been turning down more engagements this month than you had all year.”

Jason snorted, “Nick probably is too busy fucking Adam to make any of the engagements. You do know they are together now.”

Rick quirked a brow, “I hadn’t heard that but there isn’t a specific rule against it. Was it a problem? Do you think that is why Kris’ album didn’t sell?”

Kris spoke up, “There was no problem and no reason to drag Adam or Nick into the discussion. So if there is nothing else I have to do, I am going to leave LA in a couple days and check my voicemail sporadically. I will contact you when I am ready to get back into the swing of things.”

Jason shook his head, “You should try and do a couple low key gigs just to keep your foot in the door.”

Kris shook his head, “I just want to disappear. I have been acting insane for the last year and I don’t want to do that anymore. I am sorry and I understand if you take on a new client.”

“Well, at least keep in touch so I know you are alive and can help you when you want to make a come back.”

Kris appreciated everyone letting him go gracefully. Kris arranged for Daniel to watch his place and just bought a car and started traveling cross country. He stuck to small towns and tried to blend. He called Adam a few times but mostly just pulled away from friends and family and hung out in National Parks. As he traveled he tried to dial into alternative communities and even went to a few gay bars. Although, he didn’t find himself being attracted to any men per se, he did find himself becoming more comfortable with the gay lifestyle and admitting to being in love with a man. Kris thought about Adam often and missed him both physically and emotionally. He avoided calling because frankly he didn’t trust himself not to cave in and try to be with him before he was ready to change. He also avoided the internet, gossip magazines, the label and most of his friends.

Kris returned to Arkansas after four months and began coming clean to his family and friends with everything that went on with Adam. While on the road he had worked through most of his feelings through music. He wrote over 20 songs that spoke to his heart and made him feel connected to the music. He contacted Jason to arrange for him to get back in the studio in a few weeks. Kris wanted to spend some time with Katy to work through their marital failure so they could both move on and have better success in their future relationships. Kris still loved Katy and still felt close to her. Had he never met Adam or experienced the passion being with him, Kris might have considered reconciling with Katy. Since they were having drinks Kris was dumb enough to say as much,

“We really were good together, Katy. I like being with you and you were a good roommate. I kind of wish I never met Adam and realized that part of me.”

Katy pushed him then laughed, “Was that a compliment or an insult? Listen, I love you Kris but the truth is we were comfortable with each other and we got on well but there wasn’t a whole lot of fire. I kind of always thought you might be a little gay. I am kind of glad it’s true because I thought it was my fault for not being sexy but now I know it’s because I had the wrong equipment.”

“I am not 100% gay, Katy, I am bisexual. For the record, I think you are sexy but the spark between us just isn’t that strong. For some reason, Adam just floats my boat.”

Katy kissed him on the cheek, “I am glad you admitted to being bisexual and I think your taste in men is impeccable. Have you told Adam how you feel? He has been in the tabloids a lot and there have been a lot of photos of him with other men.”

“I haven’t spoken to Adam in a while. I am going to call him when I get to LA. He has gotten more popular I see.”

“He is huge and his fans are psychotic.” Katy looked at him sympathetically, “I think he may be dating someone. There have been a lot of articles about him hanging around with some former model or actor.”

Kris had a feeling it was Nick which was depressing because he doubted he could compete. Kris made plans to go to LA a couple weeks later and invited Katy to go with him. She wanted to pursue acting again and they had been getting on really well as friends. In fact, they got on better as friends than they ever did as a couple. Now that Kris was getting back in touch with the world he was shocked just how iconic Adam was getting. Every time he googled Adam he got about five thousand hits and he seemed to always be trending on twitter. Kris was concerned because many of the articles focused on his partying and hinted that he was out of control. Several pictures of him were with a smaller pretty blonde guy. Adam seemed to have had moved on. Kris certainly couldn’t blame him since according to the media Adam could have any man he wanted regardless of their orientation and did.

He was a little intimidated to call Adam but decided to try. Unfortunately, Adam had changed his cell phone number and he had little luck getting anything from the label or past Adam’s new PA. Every time he called Adam was either out or busy which meant he probably told his PA not to put the calls through. Finally, Adam’s PA told Kris to stop wasting his time calling because Adam had better things to do than talk to a has been. Kris was furious and hurt. He relayed the call to Jason who shrugged and said according to Rick, Adam had become a diva and spent most of his time drunk or high. Frustrated and sad, Kris just went into the studio and started recording some tracks. His band was excited and seemed to really like the music. Rick and Jason sat through some sessions and seemed pleased. Although they were much darker than his previous music, it sounded more authentic. Kris didn’t tell them they were mostly about Adam and his fears that he lost him.

Jason wanted Kris to make some public appearances. Kris wanted to stay below the radar but finally agreed to attend a movie premiere just to show the world he was still alive. The media had made up outrageous stories about him dying or going to rehab and even him moving to Africa to study rhinos. Since there would be a lot of Hollywood types attending, Kris invited Katy to go. She was hesitant but needed to make contacts.

They arrived at the red carpet and the media went crazy. Kris realized taking Katy might not have been the best call. He denied them getting back together and just said they were still very good friends. They went in the theater and were mingling by the concession stand turned bar. Kris heard a commotion and froze as he saw Adam enter with an entourage. He looked beautiful in an outrageous outfit and full make up. Kris also noticed he was surrounded by quite a few hot men to include the blonde in the pictures.

Kris couldn’t help staring at Adam. Katy tugged at him, “Go say hello.”

Kris hesitated and then caught Adam’s eye. Adam looked surprised and seemed to smile until his eyes fell on Katy. Adam’s expression changed to anger and he glared at Kris coldly before turning and kissing the blonde guy. Kris watched in pain as Adam made it very clear to that he was over him and on to the next man. Katy noticed the scene and pulled Kris into the screening room. Kris didn’t even watch the movie and felt sorry for himself. He finally knew what he wanted, had the courage to go after it but the object of his affection was taken. As soon as the movie ended, Katy pulled Kris out of the theater.

“Let’s go home and just relax. You have to go back in the studio tomorrow.”

Kris wasn’t sure he was up to going in the studio but just quietly followed Katy. He felt bad she couldn’t network but he needed to go home. The next day, Kris went in the studio. During lunch, he googled Adam and saw an article by Perez which of course praised Adam and ridiculed Kris. Look who emerged from the abyss, Kris Allen and he seemed to be back with his wife. A beard perhaps because Allen seems to have been star struck when Glambert arrived. Sorry, Kris, he traded up for a much hotter model. Glambert was with his latest boy toy and personal assistant Mark Larrea. Good news Mark, Glambert’s last love interest got his own show. Perez had a photo of Mark and Adam making out at a club later in the evening.

Kris just continued recording his music the rest of the afternoon. Just as his mood could not get worse, he received a voicemail message from Brad Bell requesting he call him immediately. Kris wanted to ignore it but worried something had happened to Adam. Kris steeled himself and returned Brad’s call.

“Are you retarded besides being a douche-bag? What the hell have you been doing and where the fuck have you been?”

“I have been traveling and trying to get my head on straight so I don’t keep acting like a douche-bag. I guess it took longer than I Adam was willing to wait.”

Brad took a deep breath, “Well, while that is a worthy cause, it is probably a lost one. Once a douche always a douche. Anyway, I decided you are less of an asshole than the other men he has been with especially his latest boytoy so I am going to help you win him back. At first, I was glad Adam was dating again but it has been a disaster. Mark is totally using Adam to get his career going and he is a complete drug addict. He is a total manipulator and is controlling Adam’s every move. I can’t even reach him by phone anymore. So what is the deal with you and that Barbie doll you were married to?”

Kris couldn’t stand Brad but if there was a chance… “My ex-wife and I are still friends but we are not reconciling. As for Adam, I don’t think after everything I did he is still interested in me. He has better offers.”

“I agree he has much better offers and any sane person would take them over you. Adam, however, doesn’t always exercise good taste, at least not since he has been with me. I tried to get Nick to intervene but Adam’s wasn’t interested. My only hope is he hasn’t really gotten over you. Trust me, if I thought anyone else could distract Adam, I would have used them. Besides, he moved in with Mark right after you decided to write all those love songs to your wife so this is your fault.”

“He moved in with him?”

“Yes, bitch, see what I am saying. This calls for dire measures which is why I am reaching out to you of all people.”

Kris hadn’t thought about Adam seeing the articles written about the leaked song and mumbled, “The song wasn’t about Katy.”

“Don’t care. Now do you want Adam back or not?”

Kris did. “Yeah, I do but since when are you willing to support that relationship? You hated me being with Adam, remember?”

“I remember but Mark is worse and a bigger threat to my happiness. I realize you were not an ideal mate for Adam but at least your fuckups were unintentional and just stupid. Plus, you would fuck up enough that I could still hang out with Adam.”

“If I do try and get Adam back, I am going to treat him better and try not to fuck up anymore.”

Brad laughed hysterically, “Yeah and maybe you can stop wearing plaid and bumbling in front of the media. Anyway, I have a plan.”

Kris knew he should hang up but he did want Adam and was willing to sell his soul to the devil or worse yet collaborate with Brad.

+++

Adam hadn’t seen Kris in months but the photos of him with his ex-wife still felt like a knife piercing his heart. As usual, Adam reacted by trying to mask the pain with sex. His second single had been number one for a month straight and his album was now triple platinum. He was busy making videos, doing interviews and attending parties. He had both men and women throwing themselves had him 24/7. Between feeling rejected and having had a complex in his youth, Adam started indulging and partying a little too hard. After a couple months, he realized the void he felt simply wasn’t being filled.

Nick had quit being his publicist a month after the tour. Luckily, Nick found his own replacement which was a cool woman named Joan that used to date Nick. He and Nick remained friends and Adam supported his show by giving Nick some exclusive interviews. Adam missed Kris but tried to give him space. Adam agreed with Kris that before they could truly be together Kis had to find himself. He was doing well until the articles showing Kris and Katy came out. Especially since at about the same time, Kris stopped calling. That launched the slut phase and the leaked track brought him to a new low. He had even tried to get back with Brad. Luckily, Brad had been dating someone new and turned him down. However, that rejection led him to start dating a real asshole.

Adam had met Mark after doing the Jay Leno show and hired him as a PA. Mark looked a little like a miniature Kris but not quite so innocent. Adam knew he was a bit of a scammer and drug addict. In a matter of weeks, he had moved in with Adam and managed to run up debts and make his life a living hell. Worse, he always wanted to party and insisted Adam join him. Adam was drinking and taking way too many drugs. Adam had been withdrawing from friends and family on account of Mark so no one had known the extent to which he was partying and becoming miserable. Adam’s life should have been picture perfect with all his dreams coming true and instead had lost the man he loved and was stuck living with a manic, moocher. Adam and Mark had attended a gallery opening and proceeded to both get drunk and high.

Adam blacked out and woke up confused. He noticed he was in a foreign room which made him nervous and wary of a potential scandal. So far, other than gossip stories on him being drunk and hooking up, not too much had surfaced in the media. Adam noticed the room was classy and clean. He did not appear to be in one of Mark’s druggie friend’s places which was more confusing. The last thing he remembered was doing a few lines with Mark and fighting with him on the way to a night club. Adam walked out of the room and was again surprised by the elegant look of the apartment. He knocked on a closed door and opened it to see Nolan and Nick in bed.

“Good morning, cupcake. Glad to see you functioning again.”

Fuck, an intervention by a gossip correspondent-not good! “Hi, Nick. Is this your apartment?”

“Yeah, we took you back here after you decided to make a spectacle of yourself on the street fighting with your loser boyfriend. I have to say you really do not have good taste in men and it seems to be getting worse. By the way, since you made him your PA, I think he is blocking certain people from you like your friends. Brad called me upset that he hasn’t been able to reach you in weeks.”

“Brad is dramatic he probably called twice and couldn’t get through. I am busy these days.”

“Busy partying and overcompensating. Kris is back in LA. Rick told me he is back in the studio.”

Adam knew and had heard a clip of the song he had written about Katy. What he heard had sounded beautiful and it made his blood boil to think how Kris just used him to experiment. In Adam’s self deprecating mind, he had concluded Kris used him to take a walk on the wild side and appease his seven year itch. He promised himself he would never fool around with another straight or bisexual man again.

Adam just nodded, “I could care less what Kris Allen does. My life is better without him.”

“Really? How would you know since you are not even sober for it most of the time.”

“Fuck you. I don’t need this shit. You are just looking for a new story. You better not try and get info from Nolan or Joan or I will fire them and sue you.”

Nick just shook his head, “You are becoming paranoid and you were never secretive before. What changed? Adam, as your friend, I am concerned about you and think you need to make some changes or you are going to end up on another ‘true E Hollywood story.’

Adam knew Nick’s intentions were good but he didn’t want to deal with reality. He stormed out of the apartment and called Mark. A few minutes later he was sitting next to Mark in his car and listening to him bitch about hiring a new security guy. Adam agreed to shut him up even though he knew it was wrong. He just didn’t care anymore and almost wished he was just a masseur again and never met Kris Allen.

A few days later, Adam decided to attend the premier of a new film by one of his favorite directors. Adam had been hoping to branch into acting. Mark was amenable because he too wanted Hollywood connections. Adam had taken Nick’s words to heart and had been watching Mark more closely. Adam knew he wasn’t “in love” with Mark but he still didn’t want to dump him. Especially, now that the one he was “in love” with was back in town.

They arrived at the premier and Adam immediately noticed Kris. It was as if no time had passed, and his heart just leapt at the site of the man he loved. Adam had to steady himself from running over and kissing Kris. That was until he saw HER. There was Kris standing there whispering to his ex-wife and the two looked together in every way. Adam and Kris eyes met and Kris smiled. Adam’s veins filled with ice and he immediately grabbed Mark and kissed him passionately. I deserve a role based on this performance alone. Adam knew every paparazzi was photographing him and Mark but didn’t care.

Adam knew two things- Kris had chosen Katy over him and nothing else mattered.


	40. Chapter 40

Subterfuge. Against all reason, Kris met with Brad for coffee the next day. After a few minutes, Kris began to relax his guard since Brad was on good behavior and not calling him a douchebag every minute. and could see why Adam had been with Brad. There was a positive energy and a spark about him. Brad was voicing his concerns about Adam,

“The man is too trusting and ends up getting screwed by people. You of all people should know that. This Mark character is a low life, drug addict that has totally taking control of Adam’s life. Nick and Nolan tried to talk to Adam which resulted in Nolan being fired. You know Mark was behind that and I found out from reliable sources he has done this before and totally ruined people. I can’t even call Adam to warn him. You are my Luke Skywalker, babe. How are you going to fix this?”

Kris’ jaw dropped. How the fuck was he of all people going to fix this? So far, Kris’ only experience was fucking up Adam’s life. “You said you had a plan.”

“I do. I was just hoping maybe you had a better one. Anyway, you are going to have to go on Nick’s show and pour your heart out so that there is no way Adam can miss it. Then maybe Adam will get his head out of his ass and dump Mark.”

Kris looked at Brad, “You expect me to go on a gossip show, tell the world I am bisexual, that I am in love with Adam and beg him to take me back while he is with someone else? That is beyond career destruction it is social suicide.”

Brad became annoyed, “Look, bitch. This is all your fault. The only reason Adam ended up with Mark is because you broke his heart. He was so in love with you it was downright unhealthy. I just hope he isn’t more in love with Mark. Adam seems to fall harder each time so it may not be about the person. Adam is going to Europe to promote his album. You release the single and when it hits number one you go on Nick’s show and explain it is about Adam.”

Kris had doubts, “What if he doesn’t care? Then we are no worse off.”

“I am. I will look like a major retard.”

“Stop being self-centered. I will get Nick on board. So hurry up and release your single so we will be all set when Adam comes back. Now, I have to go before I catch a case of plaid.”

Kris just rolled his eyes and watched Brad stick him with the bill. After paying, Kris went back to the studio and just worked on his songs. Kris had a meeting with Rick and Jason and said he wanted to release the leaked track as a single before the album was done. Kris didn’t tell them it was about Adam since he worried they wouldn’t support it. They agreed and the single was released a few weeks later.

Kris surfed the internet often and cringed every time a photo Adam partying in Europe appeared. He looked thinner and older. Kris tried to call him again and had an unpleasant conversation with Mark.

“How much more of an ass are you going to make of yourself? Adam has moved on and frankly you really weren’t in his league to start with. I told him you called the last time and if he hasn’t called you back yet my guess is he won’t. He mentioned something about giving up straight men. Now just go back to your wife and in twenty years you can join some one-hit, where are they now has been come back tour.”

Kris was aggravated but really had no recourse so he focused on the music. He released his new single and got scathing reviews. One claimed it was a sad attempt to add depth to a sheet of paper and another said he continued to lack authenticity. Perez simply stated he should continue looking for himself rather than bombarding the public with bullshit, meaningless pop. Worse yet, most people just ignored the release and he none of the radio stations would play it. The label had been hesitant to release a dark ballad but Kris insisted. The “I told you so’s” didn’t help.

Brad called, “Your single flopped! How are you supposed to dedicate a song to Adam when it can’t even get played? Allen you are not holding up your end of the plan.”

“Fuck you, Brad. I am taking shit from everyone and I don’t need it from you.”

“OK, I am going to ask Nick to let you on his show and you can explain why the song is so dark. I am sure Adam will see it in Europe. Based on his drunk twitters, I am sure he has internet access.”

Kris was so lost and alone, he decided to follow Brad’s advice. Katy had met someone in Hollywood so she was happy Kris was going to set the story straight in regards to the song. Kris was nervous but relaxed when he sat down with Nick. Before the camera started rolling Nick voiced some concern,

“As much as I would love the rating boost, are you sure you want to do this? Once you put it all out there, you can’t turn back. Is the label on board?”

“Nick, I don’t care anymore. Leaving Adam to find myself, turned out to be a huge mistake. Now, he is with some asshole and I am worried he is going to hurt himself. I am not sure if he will care that I love him but I have to try.”

“I think you handled a lot of things badly but taking time for introspection is not a crime. You are not responsible for Adam acting like an idiot and partying too much. However, I hope this works because I do think if you two could have get on the same sheet, you would be a great couple.”

Kris gave an honest interview and said he and Katy were good friends but no longer had romantic feelings for each other. He explained the song was actually about Adam Lambert and that the two had become romantically involved during the tour. Nick asked Kris if he was still involved with Adam.

“Unfortunately, I was not ready to go public with our relationship and needed time for myself. I guess Adam didn’t want to wait. I just wanted to set the record straight about what the song was about since there were so many rumors floating around.”

Nick looked at Kris sympathetically, “Sorry I have to ask, are you gay and is this your coming out?”

Kris seemed surprised by the question, “I am bisexual and for the most part identify with heterosexuals so I don’t think I rate a coming out. On the other hand, I am in love with a man so maybe I do.”

Nick smiled, “Well it is a hauntingly beautiful song and I hope things work out for you.”

Kris finished the interview and felt elated. He had told the world he loved Adam and it didn’t fall apart. His phone rang two hours later and Jason was screaming,

“How could you do a fucking exclusive interview without telling me! I am your goddamn publicist! The label is pissed and considering dropping you and suing you for a breach of contract. You are required to run all album promotion through them.”

“The interview was about me.”

“No, Kris, you spoke about the song. What were you thinking? Did Nick coerce you? Honestly, I think you just killed your career.”

Kris hoped Jason was being overly dramatic. The next day his interview hit the TV and the earth did collapse. The media laid into him and claimed it was a publicity stunt to garner record sales. Perez was brutal claiming Kris was deranged if he thought someone as hot as Glambert would really give him the time of day. Perez also commented that since Adam was so hot, lusting after him didn’t make necessarily make a man bisexual. Katy and his family called and told him he did a good interview and they were proud of him. Brad called,

“Wow, you don’t seem to be the golden boy anymore.”

Kris became furious thinking Brad had set him up and destroyed him, “You motherfucker! You did this on purpose-“

“Easy now. I admit part of me is getting a kick out of you being ridiculed but I did not try and make that happen. The media are assholes and just like to stir the pot. Look at how bad they treated Adam and now they kiss his ass. None of that matters. I just hope Adam watches it and decides to give you a 200th chance. Eye on the prize, Kris We just need Adam to dump Mark. For what it is worth, I actually thought this was one of your better interviews.”

Brad had a point and Kris could handle the bad press if it meant getting Adam back. Jason called Kris and told him to find a lawyer because the label was suing. He also told him Adam released a statement claiming there was no great romance between them and Kris was very confused perhaps requiring psychological help. Adam’s blatant rejection was something he couldn’t take and realized how much it must have hurt Adam when he threw him to the wolves way back when. In the midst of wallowing in his self pity, Kris gained a new appreciation to just how strong Adam was that he withstood all the negativity when the world thought he was a pervert. Kris decided to just take a long nap secretly hoping he didn’t wake up.

The next morning Katy came over to make sure Kris was OK, “I saw the statement Adam released and the media is having a field day. You mom called me and she is pissed at Adam for lying. Are you OK?”

“I am being sued by the label and probably won’t get to release any more albums. I think maybe I will just come back to Arkansas although now that I am ‘bisexual’ that might not be such a good idea. This really sucks, Katy.”

“I know it seems bad right now but I have a feeling when you come out the other side things will be better than before. I may not be in love with you but I do love you and I am more proud of you for being honest than when you were acting like a crazy man spewing inane lies. Your fans will come around.”

Kris doubted it but thought it was a nice sentiment. He steeled himself to face the music.

+++

Adam was going through the motions and spending most of his time buzzed. He was in Europe promoting his album and very busy. Adam felt bad about letting Nolan go but Mark had a point that he had crossed the line intervening and was too close to the media. Mark knew someone to take Nolan’s place so it had seemed easy. Adam was depressed and felt totally disjointed from his life. Everyone was keeping there distance since Adam fired Nolan. Even his band seemed to be walking on egg shells. Adam had also let Joan go before going to Europe since she made a stink about firing Nolan. He replaced her with another publicist from the label. He just didn’t care.

Adam and Mark’s romantic relationship had deteriorated and more often than not they both strayed. Adam had a lot of offers and as usual found sex to be a great time passer. Still, it was doing nothing to heal his broken heart. Mark and his new publicist, Bill kept him busy and controlled most of his interviews. Adam figured they were doing a great job since no one reported he went over the deep end and was just a pathetic drunk.

A couple weeks into the tour he noticed reporters were starting to ask him about Kris again. Will they never let that story die? Adam hadn’t spoken to Kris in months and hadn’t even seen him since the movie premier. Mark told him he released the single about his wife but it flopped. Adam felt bad when he read some of the scathing reviews especially because the song was good. He hated that Kris was pining for his wife but at least he expressed it well musically.

Adam was exhausted from too many promos, performances and parties. He was constantly battling little illnesses from being worn down. He was going through the motions and didn’t even bother following the news anymore assuming his publicist would enlighten him. They returned to the US and Mark insisted he go on bed rest for a couple weeks. Adam was too tired to disagree. His mother came by to check on him. Adam was happy to see her.

“You don’t look so good, Adam. What is going on?”

“I am just tired. I am going to rest for a few days and then I’ll come by and see you.”

“OK, Brad called me a few times claiming he couldn’t get through to you and seemed very concerned. Why don’t you give him a call and let him know you are fine.”

“I will.” Adam hung up and thought about calling Brad but then he would have to listen to a lecture about not calling. It could wait. Adam slept for two days straight and woke up feeling pretty good. Adam had a meeting with the label and decided to go without Mark. Mostly because Mark was passed out and had obviously partied without Adam the night before. Bill joined him at the meeting and they discussed doing a solo tour in a couple months. Rick laid out very generous terms and Adam agreed. They were finishing up and Adam couldn’t resist,

“Have you seen Kris lately?”

Rick tensed, “Yeah, actually we met with him yesterday on account of the lawsuit. I wouldn’t worry about him bothering you.”

Adam was confused, “What do you mean ‘bothering me’?”

Rick shrugged, “You know the bullshit about being in love with you to get album sales. I think you handled it well by just denying having had a relationship and moving on.”

Adam’s head was spinning because he had no idea what Rick was talking about. Kris in love with him? Did he miss something? Adam took a deep breath,

“What exactly are you referring too?”

“Duh. The interview with Nick after the single tanked. You know where he went on and on about being in love with you but being too afraid to go public. Then he claimed that the song was about you not Katy. Yaddah, yaddah, yaddah. He said you two had been involved on the tour. Are you high that this doesn’t ring a bell?”

“What statement did I make?”

“You claimed he was basically lying and very disturbed.”

Adam started hyperventilating. Kris had come forward with his feelings and Adam had apparently crushed him. Rick went on,

“Adam, it was bullshit. He was totally trying to ride your coat tails. If Bill didn’t include you in the statement, I’d give him a raise because it was a perfect response and you came out smelling like roses. It was just another example of how you make gay look good and tempt straight men. Kris has treated you like crap and dug his own grave. Keep your eye on the prize which is becoming the biggest sensation since Elvis.”

Adam just nodded and left the meeting. He immediately googled Kris and started reading all that went on. He started to feel nauseous. He wanted to call and apologize and explain he didn’t make the statement. That was until he saw the latest article by Perez.

Kris Allen decides to replace the object of his affection with none other than Adam Lambert’s ex. Seen here in an intimate embrace, Kris Allen and Brad Bell seem to be consoling each other in Glambert’s absence. Really boys in case you haven’t noticed he does have better offers. The article showed flattering pictures of Mark and Nick.

Adam was shocked. What the fuck!!! Was Brad calling to tell him he and Kris were an item? Those bastards. Adam felt like he was in an alternate universe and decided he didn’t want to know the sordid details. Kris and Brad, un-fucking-believable. Adam went back to his house and proceeded to drink a fifth of vodka. As he became comfortably drunk it occurred to him that maybe he was looking at this the wrong way. Kris and Brad…nice. Adam began to touch himself as he envisioned the ultimate threesome.


	41. Chapter 41

Resilience. Kris was surrounded by negativity. The label was furious, Jason quit, his band was pissed, and most of his friends were embarrassed for him. His family was supportive but on an anti-Adam kick that Kris didn’t want to hear about. Knowing it was a bad solution, Kris decided to get drunk and hide out in his apartment. When he went out he was hounded by paparazzi so he stopped doing that. Most of his staff had quit but Jake hung around which surprised Kris.

“I understand if you want to quit, Jake. It is kind of a shitty job protecting public enemy number one,” Kris gave him a self-deprecating smile.

“Actually, that makes for some excitement. Besides, I think you can use my services right now. Do you want to go out for a bit?”

“Not really, I just want to turn off my phone and cocoon.” Jake just nodded and said he’d be back the next day in case Kris wanted to venture out.

Kris said goodbye and googled himself. He saw the reporters got a hold of the lawsuit threat and went on to say Adam’s album was one of the highest selling debut albums in the past decade. Kris became alarmed when someone was banging on his door. Kris warily answered and saw a hyper Brad at his doorstep,

“What are you doing? I tried to call you for two days. How are we supposed to save Adam if you can’t even answer the phone? You look like shit and smell kind of rancid. Shower and get dressed, we are going to breakfast. Choose something fashionable so I am not embarrassed by you.”

Kris was so happy for human contact he did as Brad instructed except that he chose to wear his loudest plaid shirt. Brad just rolled his eyes,

“Come on my Beverly Hillbilly you are taking me to the most fabulous Sunday brunch in all of Weho.”

They went to a very over the top restaurant and proceeded to eat an expensive brunch. Kris accepted the fact that he would be footing the bill. Brad was telling him some funny stories about himself and Kris found himself lightening up and enjoying his brunch. Brad switched topics after a particularly funny story,

“I spoke to Nick yesterday and it seems Adam is due back in the US in a few days. I saw the statement he made and I don’t think he made it. Adam wouldn’t lie like that. In fact, aside from keeping you a secret, Adam is always honest about who he is dating or hooked up with. I think Mark or his new publicist released a statement and Adam either didn’t know or just ignored it. Nick also said his publicist Bill is a real asshole and we both know Mark’s a dick.”

“Well, even if he didn’t make the statement he certainly is still not running to me.”

“How would you know since you don’t even keep your phone on?”

“Voicemail. By the way, the label is suing me.”

Brad’s eyes widened, “What are they suing you for? They let being a douche slide.”

Kris ignored Brad’s insult, “Breach of contract.”

“Fuck them. Counter-sue on the basis of discrimination. Claim they are harassing you because you like a guy. People always back down from that shit. Now can we stop focusing on you for just a moment?”

Brilliant. Brad actually said something useful. Feeling overjoyed at the possibility of fixing one of his hundred problems, Kris got up and hugged Brad and whispered his thanks. Brad hugged him back,

“OK now stop ruining my game. There are some cute guys here and I don’t want them to think we are an item.” Kris released Brad and sat down again.

“So, when Adam comes back he is bound to go out and celebrate. Adam loves to celebrate anything. We just have to figure out where and when and show up. I’ll help you look good and then you just have to seduce him while I kill Mark.”

Kris looked at Brad, “Isn’t killing a little extreme?”

“I guess but it sounded so fierce. OK, I will just tell him off in front of some paparazzi. Not as exciting but you are right we should exercise some restraint.”

Kris finished his brunch and made plans to go watch a movie at Brad’s apartment the next night. It sounded way better than getting drunk in his apartment and Brad assured him that there were no paparazzi lurking about his place.

Kris went to sleep and woke up the next day to banging on his door. Kris opened it this time to an irate Brad.

“I told you not to wear fucking plaid! Now the world thinks I am dating a fashion retard. How could you do this to me after I tried to help?”

Kris was confused, “I have no idea what you are yelling at me about. Are you drunk from last night or something?”

Brad became frustrated, “Yesterday when you hugged me at the restaurant there must have been paparazzi or cell phone happy people because there is a picture of us together claiming we are an item. I have a fucking boyfriend right now. I have to be discreet and a hundred fucking articles claiming we’re lovers is not discreet!”

“No one will believe it.”

“Of course they will. Just like they believe a giant jelly fish can eat a whole family. The public is dumb, Kris. You need to do an interview and explain yourself.”

“It won’t help. Besides, you’re the one that said ‘eye on the prize’ this is about Adam, remember?”

“Fuck you. That only applied when it was you being dragged through the mud. Now it is me and that is not cool. We need to speed up this plan which is why we are meeting with Nick to discuss a solution. Get dressed and for the love of God, no fucking plaid!”

Brad and Kris met with Nick who felt pretty bad about all the negative press Kris was getting. Kris told him about the lawsuit and Nick said he would make it clear to Rick that he would paint the label as anti-gay if they pursued it. Kris was starting to feel less depressed and hoped their efforts would not go unrewarded. He felt even better the next day when Nick called,

“I have some good news and some bad news.”

“Give me the good news first to soften the blow.”

“The label is dropping their lawsuit. They cannot afford to be seen as an anti-gay company with so many gay friendly artists. So, no need for a lawyer.”

Kris was relieved, “The bad news?”

“The label is pissed and will basically keep you strapped to them with no record for the duration of your contract which is two more years. You can try to buy out your contract but it would cost millions.”

Kris laughed, “Well, unfortunately, I don’t have millions just lying around. Actually, I had fun traveling around so maybe I can do Europe while I wait for the contract to expire. If I live conservatively I can last three years or maybe I can get a different job.”

“That is worse case scenario. Maybe they will change their minds after a year. Sometimes it is just a scare tactic to keep artists in the box.”

Once again it was a nice sentiment but Kris didn’t plan on holding his breath.

+++

Adam woke up with a bitch of a hangover. Rolling over and seeing Mark didn’t help matters. Adam got up quietly and made a pot of coffee. As his head cleared he processed all that he heard yesterday. Why had Kris publicly admitted to being in love with Adam? Why didn’t Kris just call him so they could sort things out privately? Come to think of it, it seemed like most of his friends just fell off the radar. Was Adam being that much of a dick lately or perhaps the calls were not getting through…Adam called his friend Cassidy,

“Hi Adam, long time no speak. Are you still on tour?”

“No, I am kicking off a massive tour in a month. I was just in Europe doing promo work but now I am back in LA. Have you tried to call me at all?”

“I tried a few weeks ago but Mark said you were busy. Brad has tried to call you a lot but we all just assumed you finally got smart and cut him off. Why? Do you think you haven’t been getting messages? If you don’t mind me saying, your new boyfriend, Mark, has a bad reputation of manipulating people so I wouldn’t be surprised if he ‘lost’ messages.”

“Me neither. Hey, Cass, do you know if Brad is still with his boyfriend, the one from the gallery?”

“No, I think he went back with the cop. He is definitely not with Kris Allen if that is what you are trying to ask. Come on you and Brad would never have the same taste in men. Besides while you relax your fashion requirement in men, Brad is way too shallow to do that. He was very upset when the photo of him and Kris surfaced.”

“Well, if they are not having sex, why are they hanging out?”

“I hope that was rhetorical because I don’t know the answer. I have to go to a business meeting, swing by some time we have great new jackets.”

Adam hung up and started to shake with anger. He knew for months now Mark had been playing him but he didn’t think he had gone that far. He didn’t know he might have cost him Kris. He went in the bedroom and slammed the door which woke Mark up.

“What’s wrong, baby? Sorry I came in late my ride was drunk.”

“Have you been blocking my calls?”

Mark sat up, “Sweetie, I am your personal assistant it is my job to screen your calls. I put through the ones you want and get rid of the annoying ones.”

“Was Kris Allen an annoying one?”

Mark seemed to get nervous, “Yes, because he was using you. Adam, he hurt you so bad that I couldn’t stand the thought of you being in pain again. He only called a couple times when he released his song. It was obvious he was looking for a sales boost. I’m sorry but I did it because I love you.”

Adam wanted to kill him but chose to use his words, “I am not drunk or stoned so your stupid lies are not working. You don’t love me, you love my money and fame. You purposely didn’t let Brad or Kris reach me because you saw them as threats. I don’t like people lying to me and I don’t like people doing bad things for my ‘good’. Pack your shit because I am firing you as my PA and dumping you as a boyfriend.”

Mark started crying and attempting to appeal to Adam’s soft side, “Please don’t do this, baby. I need you and love you. I stood by you through everything.”

Adam felt bad for a nanosecond, “Yeah and got to get high and drunk on my dime. When we met my life was on a downward spiral and you just made it accelerate. You encouraged me to stay inebriated, fire good people and basically withdraw from everyone I love. Worst of all, you blocked the one person I really love. Now get out and don’t ever bother me again.”

One down, one to go. Adam called Bill and asked him if he released a statement about Kris Allen. Bill said he released the statement Mark told him Adam said. Adam wasn’t sure if he was lying but decided to not waste his time figuring out.

“OK, Bill, let’s say you went off of what my former PA told you, rather than making up a total lie. You are still fired because I can’t trust you to exercise good judgment. Have a nice life.” Adam hung up and called Joan and begged her to come back to work for him. She agreed after an hour of Adam groveling and made hiring Nolan back a condition. Adam happily agreed and only hoped Nolan would come back.

Adam called Nolan and he agreed to meet with Adam but would not commit to working for him again. Adam met Nolan for lunch that day and Nick showed up with him.

Nick smiled, “Hi cupcake, I came to make sure you groveled enough to Nolan and then agreed to do an interview with me. Although you better run the latter through the label because they can be awfully vindictive. Just ask Kris Allen.”

“I’ll happily grovel because I need to keep good people around me and ones that will call me out on things. I’ll pay you a year’s salary up front so I can’t fire you again.”

Nick laughed, “You are still a crappy businessman.”

Nolan pushed Nick, “Throw in a ten percent raise and I will come back to work tomorrow.”

Adam had no idea what he was making in the first place so he just agreed. He was glad Nick was there so he could find out about Kris. Adam asked nonchalantly, “Have you seen or heard from Kris since the interview?”

Nick nodded, “I had lunch with him and Brad a couple days ago.”

Holy shit it was true! Fucking Krad or Bris whatever term the fucking media had used was real. Adam became tense, “Were they happy together?”

Nick and Nolan looked at each other and then Nick smacked Adam in the back of the head, “Are you for real? You honestly are spinning yourself up thinking Brad and Kris are a couple. What drugs were you on that you could even imagine the two together? I think the fact that Kris has enlisted Brad’s help to get you back is a true testament of just how much he loves you. No one should ever be forced to turn to Brad.”

Adam felt appropriately shamed on that count but continued to ask inane questions, “Point taken. Anyway, since you interviewed Kris, do you think he chose to come forward about me as a sales boost? Or more accurately since his sales were down, only opened up because he had nothing to lose?”

Nick looked at Adam, “I don’t think he is lying as for the timing, I don’t know. Maybe it was a combination of things to include bad sales but the reality is he did have something to lose and pretty much lost it. Look, you wanted him to go public and he did. His worst fears have come true since basically he lost his fans and career on account of loving you. Now, what are you going to do about it?”

“I guess call him up and try to explain that I didn’t make the statement.”

“That is fine but you publicly rejected him so you need to make a public statement too. Plus, I want the interview and you made need some third party mediation. Communication is definitely not you and Kris’ strongpoint. Also, stop acting like 13 year old girls. If you two are going to make it as a couple, you need to tune out gossip magazines, crazy rumors and past insecurities. If you can’t trust each other, there is no sense even putting the energy into getting back together. The good news is Kris is so shaken up and turned around he probably won’t even address the whole ‘Mark’ thing for months. But, you did kind of get another boyfriend while he was finding himself.”

Adam became defensive, “Because he went back with Katy. What was I supposed to do? Pine away?”

Nick rolled his eyes, “That is my point. He did not get back with Katy and you just reacted to a rumor. Did you ask him before getting together with Mark? Anyway, talk to the label and let me know if you can do the interview. We can also talk about your upcoming world tour.”

Adam went back home and thought about everything and how hard it must be for Kris. He also felt immensely guilty that Kris’ career and life was destroyed on account of him. Adam remembered the first time he went to Kris’ house and how amazing it was to be giving Kris Allen, the rock star, a massage. Although, he had a rough start, since that day his life had improved and all his dreams came true. Kris, on the other hand, got pummeled. He went from being America’s golden idol to a dishonest, bisexual has been. No, Kris was not better off having met him. Adam grabbed his phone and texted Kris,

I M sorry 4 everything. I didn’t make that statement. I… Adam hit delete. A text was not going to make up for anything. He needed to make things right. He needed to vindicate Kris and try and help him get his career back on track. Maybe Kris could join his tour.

Adam phoned Joan and told her he wanted to go on Nick’s show and to clear it with the label. Adam was feeling better than he had in months and was energized with a sense of purpose. He had a month before his Eurasia tour would kick off so he decided it would be a good time to take a break from the booze and drugs. He also made sure to call his friends so they would have his phone number. Mark had switched Adam’s phone a month ago claiming some fans had gotten a hold of the number. Adam called Brad,

“Hi Brad, its Adam.”

“So you really are alive. I thought either aliens took your body over or you were a wax statue. What the fuck, Adam? I called you a lot and even if I hadn’t you should have called me to see if I am alive? Were you that busy with your new twink or did he have a ‘no contacting the ex-boyfriends’ rule?”

“Sorry, I was caught up in my rock and roll lifestyle. How are you?”

“Peachy, thanks for asking. So where is the boy toy?”

“We parted ways. Look, I fucked up OK can you just forgive me and move on?”

Adam waited while Brad seemed to mull it over which meant he was thinking up a counter offer. “On Friday I am throwing a huge extravaganza to promote my new EP. If you show up looking good and acting contrite, I will forgive you. Try to bring some paparazzi with you since I didn’t really promote the event.”

“OK, I will be there and even twitter about it. So since when are you and Kris such good friends?”

“Since he started giving me blowjobs. He has gotten really good under my tutelage.”

Adam dropped the phone and was freaking out. He picked it up, “Excuse me?”

“Excuse you? Excuse me, bitch. So, be at the warehouse where Skingraft did there fashion show at 9 pm on friday. I gotta go to a dance class with Cass, later.”

“Wait! Care to elaborate on the blow job thing?”

“No, not really.” Brad hung up and Adam was left freaked out. His brain was telling him Brad was joking but his insecurities were screaming louder. Listen to Nick and don’t jump to conclusions. Adam swallowed his pride and called Kris. He got his voicemail and decided to leave a neutral message.

“Hi Kris, its Adam. I am back in LA and wasn’t sure you had my new number. Now you do. Please give me a call back because I think there are things that need to be said. OK, call me. Bye.” Great, after not talking to each other for months, all he could come up with was a line from Knotting Hill. Adam wasn’t sure if Kris would call back but waited by the phone anyway. Kris never called back that day or the next which hurt. Adam double checked that his phone was operating and fought the urge to call him again.

Adam met with Rick and Joan and discussed going on Nick’s show. Rick told him to try to avoid any questions about Kris and to not speculate on the label’s reaction to Kris’ interview. As to the false statement, Rick caved and would let Adam deny he had any knowledge of the statement. Adam asked if the label was going drop Kris.

“No, but he is not making money and has breached his contract. We will simply hold the contract and when it expires simply not renew.”

“He is a great musician. Why isn’t the label promoting him? Is it because the single is about me?”

Rick rolled his eyes, “I don’t care if the single was about his dog. The reality is he is not current and he lost his fan base. We have plenty of performers fighting to take his spot. I just don’t think he is viable now. You on the other hand are extremely marketable and have a rabid fan base that grows every day. Be careful about not getting dragged down by other people’s problems. The public is fickle just ask Kris.”

“So is this label.”

“Exactly. Adam, I like you a lot and have been supporting you from the start. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you because that doesn’t help you or Kris. Think about your fans and all that you are doing for the gay and lesbian movement. I am sure Kris will understand if you don’t risk your career. He didn’t until it was over. Just think about it.”

Adam agreed to go on Nick’s show in a week. He stayed busy with costume fittings and tour preparations. On Friday he got done to the nines and went to Brad’s rave slash release party. Adam was proud of Brad and also appreciated that he never tried to ride Adam’s coat tails. He went in the party and saw some of his old friends which was nice. He had been clean a week not that he had really done all that much drugs. He had been drinking Perrier until he saw HIM. Adam’s jaw dropped as he spotted a glammed out Kris Allen. Kris was in tight leather pants and a transparent birch colored blouse that was unbuttoned to his waist. Adam grabbed a few jello shots from a passing cocktail waitress, down them and proceeded to move toward his ultimate fantasy.


	42. Chapter 42

Euphoria. Kris found he had time on his hands since making music was not an option at the moment. He decided to volunteer at the ASPCA both hoping to help animals and gain some positive karma. Lord knows the last few months had been pretty shitty. Matters didn’t get better when the pitbull he was walking decided to chomp on his phone and break it. On the other hand, now he didn’t have to be bothered by annoying phone calls either hating him or pitying him. If anyone really needed to reach him, he still had a home phone. It is not like the one man he loved was going to suddenly call.

Kris came home after five hours at the shelter and found Brad in his living room reading his lyric book.

“How the hell did you get in here? Did you break in my apartment?”

“Yeah, bitch, I McGuyvered my way in using just a false eyelash and earring. Actually, your housekeeper let me in due to my wonderful command of the Yugoslavian language. I told her I was your boyfriend and I guess she reads the enquirer because she bought it. Anyway, what is it with you and body odor. Now you smell like a dog.”

“I am volunteering at the ASPCA.”

Brad looked at Kris, “That is pretty cool of you so I won’t say anything snarky about that but the conversation doesn’t always have to be about you.”

Kris just stared blankly at Brad figuring that comment didn’t need to be dignified with a response Brad continued, “So, Adam called me.”

Kris new he should be happy but he felt very jealous. Brad didn’t notice of course and just continued, “He seems to have realized he was being an ass and acted contrite. More importantly he agreed to come to my party Friday.”

“Good for you. Maybe he will bring some publicity.”

“That is what I was thinking. Anyway…why do you sound like I just kicked the puppy you were playing with? Bitch, this is the opportunity we were waiting for. Now, Friday afternoon you come to my place, I clean you up, dress you up and glam you out.” Brad looked him up and down, “Better make that early afternoon, late morning. Then, we go to the party and you seduce Adam.”

Kris was skeptical, “I don’t know, Brad. He hasn’t called or anything. Maybe he isn’t interested.”

“It’s the plaid. I’m telling you, Adam won’t be able to resist you in some tight clothes, cool hair and glitter.”

Kris cringed, “Glitter.”

“Yes, if you really want him back you have to be prepared to sparkle. I’ll see you Friday.”

Brad left and Kris realized he would see Adam in a couple days and became excited. He hoped the reunion didn’t become another cosmic disaster. Kris got a call from the label and they told him basically what Nick said they would. He was not being sued but there were some administrative issues they needed to work through which could take months, even years. They told him to sit tight until he heard from them. Kris responded by simply laughing and assuring them he’d be holding his breath until they called. Kris called the band and told them to go back to their solo projects because the album was on hold.

Friday afternoon Kris went to Brad’s house full of trepidation. It didn’t help matters when Brad answered the door way too jolly and seemed to be wearing some sort of evil smock. Matters didn’t get better when he told Kris they needed to put a couple highlights in his hair and clean up his eyebrows.

“This isn’t an elaborate payback, is it? You aren’t going to make me look stupid, right?”

“Krissifer, I am going to make you look fabulous. Consider yourself lucky that I am helping you look good at a party that is all about me. You might find this hard to believe but I am usually not that altruistic a person.”

Kris bit his tongue to not laugh at that understatement. Brad proceeded to poke, prod, dye, pluck, and gel him. Kris refused to let him pierce anything and then freaked out with the clothes choice.

“Brad these pants are way too tight and way to low cut. You can see my friggin’ pubic hair.”

“That is why God invented razors, Kris. Now stop being squeamish. Leather is supposed to be tight. I think it looks good. You have a better body than I thought so you should show it off more. Now, go shave what you need to and we will finish up. I have to start making myself pretty which by the way is a much smaller task.” Brad smiled.

Brad finished him up with lots of eyeliner, shadow, gloss and a shitload of glitter. Kris looked at the finished product and was amazed. He looked very different and very glammed out. If only it had been Halloween…

They went to the party together at eight. Brad introduced him to various people which included Brad’s latest boyfriend. Brad appeared to be dating a fairly conservative Italian cop which seemed funny to Kris. Kris noticed a lot of men and women checking him out. He became more confident and relaxed in his incredibly revealing, tight clothes. However, at around ten o’clock his nerves went on edge when he saw HIM. Kris noticed the second Adam walked in the room because he just had that effect. Adam looked more beautiful than Kris remembered. He was in a dark tight outfit with glittery platform boots. His hair was in a pompadour and he had on heavy makeup which made his eyes appear to glow. He seemed larger than life as he threw back his head laughing at something someone was saying. Kris just stared until Adam looked across the room at him. When their eye met, Kris caught his breath at the intensity of the stare. Adam began moving towards him and Kris recognized the sight of pure lust in Adam’s eyes. Thank you, Brad.

Although people seemed to be stopping Adam along the way, his gaze never wavered nor did his pace. Adam reached Kris and stood right in front of him and simply continued staring. Kris felt the butterflies in his stomach which made him nervous and giddy. So much for being sexy and mysterious. Kris smiled,

“Hi, Adam.”

Adam just stared for a second and then suddenly pulled Kris to him and starting kissing him passionately. Kris responded as much out of desire as shock. Every nerve in his body was set on fire and he could think of nothing but kissing Adam back. After a few minutes and a rather disturbing amount of cat calls in the background, Adam pulled back. Kris was confused and felt suddenly awkward,

“Er…it’s good to see you too.”

Adam laughed which broke the tension, “Kris, you look…you look fucking hawt. Is this your new image?”

Kris laughed and decided to be honest, “No, I dressed up to seduce you tonight.”

Adam’s eyes lit up, “Well, Kris, you succeeded. I know there are a million things we need to say to each other and stuff to sort out. But…”

“But, we can do it in the morning.”

“Yeah, I have a limo waiting outside. Let’s go before I can’t control myself.” Adam grabbed Kris’ hand and started pulling him toward the door. Brad blocked their exit.

“Adam, you just got here and Kris you are supposed to play a little hard to get. I didn’t spend five hours helping you primp for a two second seduction.”

Kris smiled, “Eye on the prize, Brad.” Kris sidestepped Brad and dragged a laughing Adam out the door. As promised a white limo was parked right outside the exit. Unfortunately, so were a lot of paparazzi blocking the path. Kris was still holding Adam’s hand as he was blinded by flashes. Kris turned to look at Adam who seemed to just smile at the cameras. Fuck it, I already said I loved the guy. Kris pulled Adam a little closer and kissed him short on the lips.

Adam smiled, “Here is a better photo-op.” Adam kissed him longer and then pushed him into the limo. He said goodnight to the paparazzi who were yelling, “Who is the new boy toy, Glambert?”

Kris laughed as he realized no one recognized him. He stopped giggling when Adam answered,

“That my friends, was Kris Allen, my soon to be boyfriend.”

Adam climbed in and then looked at Kris nervously, “Too presumptuous?”

Kris laughed, “Very presumptuous. You are going to have to be very persuasive tonight, Glambert.”

“I plan to be, Mr. Allen.” Adam kissed him and didn’t stop until the car pulled up outside of a really nice house. Adam smiled, “My new place. I just moved in a couple days ago so it’s still a little bare.”

“Does it have a bed?”

Kris watched the mischievous grin spread across Adam’s face, “Oh, yeah, a great bed.”

+++

What cosmic entity’s cock did I suck to get so lucky? Adam had expected to spend days groveling at Kris’ feet and begging forgiveness. Instead, he was sucking his face and headed back to his house for what was starting off as an amazing night. Adam had been blown away by a sexy, glammed out Kris but also had forgotten that Kris just did it for him. From their first meeting, hell from the first time he saw Kris on American Idol, he was infatuated. He prayed he didn’t fuck it up again or neither did Kris.

They arrived at the new house he was renting for a ridiculously high price. So far the only thing he had purchased was a bedroom set with a California King bed and a huge TV. They went inside and of course there was nowhere to sit and relax since he had only purchased a bedroom set so far. Adam felt self-conscious, “Sorry, we should have just gone to your place.”

“Do you really think I care about the décor right now? Why don’t you show me the bedroom, I heard you have a great bed.”

Adam showed him to the bedroom. As soon as they entered Kris was all over him. In the back of Adam’s mind he knew they were probably moving too fast. But, Kris was obviously worked up and there was no way Adam was going to slow him down. Kris was running his hands over Adam’s bulging crotch,

“What are you wearing, latex?”

“Pleather. As much as I love your outfit, I’d rather we were naked.” Kris nodded and they both yanked off all their clothing. Adam felt obliged to give Kris an out,

“Are you sure you don’t want to slow down?”

“Adam, I’ve been waiting for you for months. I definitely don’t want to slow down.”

“In that case…”

Even Adam’s wildest fantasies didn’t live up to the reality of being with a self-accepting Kris. What Kris lacked in experience, he made up for in initiative. The two stayed up until dawn getting re-acquainted with one another and pleasing each other. At about seven in the morning they finally both gave in to sleep and didn’t wake up until late afternoon. Luckily, Adam had thought to turn the ringer off because he had about fifty messages. Apparently, the web had gone viral with the video of Adam and Kris kissing and Adam saying Kris Allen was his future boyfriend. Shit, Kris is going to freak. Adam called Joan who told him they had a meeting with Rick at four and she would be picking him up in fifteen minutes. Adam jumped in the shower and got dressed. Kris came out of the bedroom looking sleepy, unkempt and incredibly sexy. Adam hoped he didn’t pull his usual Jekyll and Hyde and tentatively greeted him,

“Goodmorning, lover.”

“Goodmorning, future boyfriend.”

Adam laughed, “About that. It sort of got recorded and is all over the internet.”

“Well, seeing as you told about twenty paparazzi with video cameras, I kind of figured it might. Are you in trouble?”

“Me? You are the one that gets hammered by the label.”

Kris laughed, “How can I get in trouble? My publicist quit and the label for all intents and purposes dropped me. The only person that will probably be annoyed is my Mom because she is mad at you because of the statement you made.”

“Well, we will have to go to Little Rock so I can clear my name. Joan is picking me up in ten minutes. You can stay here until I get back.”

“Nah, I have to go to Brad’s and get my car.” Kris looked down and then looked at Adam with trepidation, “Do you have any regrets?”

Adam gazed into Kris’ eyes, “Yeah, mostly that you were out of my bed for so long. Kris, I am in love with you and apparently no catastrophic events, humiliation, misunderstandings or time apart changes that. I want you in my life and I want us to be together. Don’t get me wrong I love the fame and money but it really is meaningless without you.”

Kris smiled, “Good because I plan on sticking around for a long time.”

Joan arrived and they met with the label. Adam’s contract was up in three months. He used that fact as a bargaining tool to get the label to agree to let Kris finish his album. He also informed them that he would be doing an interview with Nick. Since he was at the top of his game, the label agreed and said they were going to make him an extremely generous offer to renew.

Adam tried to call Kris several times that evening but could only reach his voice mail. Adam hoped Kris hadn’t changed his tune. Kris called Adam later that night and informed him that he his cell phone was out of commission. Adam didn’t mention what went on in his meeting and thankfully Kris didn’t ask. Adam went over Kris’ house and the two spent Sunday in bed. On Monday, Adam went on Nick’s show and Kris came along to watch. Kris didn’t seem overly concerned with what Adam told the world. He just told Adam to use his best judgment since he was usually brilliant with the media.

Nick began the interview with small talk and then went for the jugular,

“So, everyone has seen the video of you and Kris. First, is that Kris’ new image?”

Adam laughed, “No, this morning he was wearing plaid again.”

“So, you two are together.”

“Well, it is really nobody’s business but yes we are together.”

“Weren’t you dating someone else?”

Adam looked at Kris, “I was but we broke up for several reasons which included me being hung up on Kris.”

Nick smiled, “You are going on a three month international tour. Won’t that strain your relationship?”

Adam had not been prepared for that question. He looked at Kris for help. Nick motioned for Kris to come out on stage. Kris came out and took a microphone.

“Actually, I was thinking of going on tour with Adam.”

Adam’s jaw dropped because this was the first time Kris mentioned it. Unfortunately, Adam would have to burst Kris’ bubble since the label was adamant he keep his original opening act. Kris could not perform on the tour. Shit.

Nick was probably aware of that fact because he seemed just as taken back, “You are going to perform on his tour?”

Kris laughed and shook his head, “No, nothing of the sort. I heard he needed a new PA and frankly since he has a horrible habit of sleeping with them, I figured I had better take the job.”

Adam was caught totally off guard. Nick laughed, “Aren’t you in the middle of recording an album?”

“No, it has been put on the back burner. To be honest, as much as I loved the songs I wrote they are kind of depressing and don’t suit my mood anymore. I think I’d rather go on tour with Adam and write happier songs.”

Adam so overjoyed he forgot about the cameras and spoke unfiltered, “Thank god because I don’t think I was really willing to give up having you in my bed at night and in my arms in the morning.”

Nick coughed, “Well, I guess you heard it here first. Kris Allen is going on tour with Adam Lambert as his…personal assistant.”

Adam shook his head, “No Nick, he is going as my wonderful, supportive, cute boyfriend.”

They wrapped up the interview and went to Kris’ house. Adam still loved his house and wanted to get one with a dance studio and music studio too. Adam told Kris he was going to look for a house exactly like his after the tour. Kris kissed him on the lips,

“Why don’t you just move into this one? I’m sort of unemployed so it’d be nice to get some help on the mortgage. Plus, I hear it comes with a really cute boyfriend.”

“Are you sure you could live with me?”

“I definitely could share a 10,000 square foot living space with you. I think the true test will be the three months I share hotel rooms and tour bus bunks with you.”

Adam decided to move in right away. He was hoping Kris would let him decorate some of the rooms but figured he would wait to ask. His family tried to caution him about moving too fast. Even Nick lectured him that they had only been together a week and had not even sorted through their issues. The only person that was supportive was Brad. Adam had lunch with Brad and brought it up,

“Brad, do you think Kris and I are moving too fast?”

“Well, duh. You just started speaking again like yesterday and now he is going on tour and you are moving in with him. I’d say that was brisk. But, Adam you are spontaneous and always leap without looking. Even though the guy has been a douche bag from day one, he sort of grew on me so I say go for it. Luckily, you set the bar so fucking low with Mark, Kris is an easy sell. Why wait?”

Adam concurred 100%. After moving in, Adam became busy with rehearsals. Adam was tired from long days and lack of sleep. Having Kris in his bed every night was a blessing he never expected and he didn’t want to waste it with sleep. Adam worried about Kris’ career and the night before the tour kicked off voiced his concerns,

“Kris, you are so talented musically don’t you want to work on your album?”

“I am going to write on the road. Adam, I have been living the dream for almost seven years since American Idol and frankly I am tired. I love you and this relationship will not work if we are both going a mile a minute. This is your time and you are the one selling all the hits. In a couple years you will burn out and then you can take the backseat to me. Actually, I think I am going to enjoy being a kept man.”

“I am going to treat you so good, Kristopher Allen. You can have whatever your heart desires whenever you want.”

“Good, because I am going to want massages. In fact, lots of massages with very happy endings. Think you can handle that, Glambert?”

In response, Adam kissed Kris passionately, “I’ll die trying.”

Epilogue

One year later. Although Kris did not make much of a PA, he was a great boyfriend. The three month mini-tour turned into a full blown, year-long tour. Kris made sure Adam rested and gave him advice on staying sane. Adam was grateful he had a boyfriend that knew exactly what it meant to be a singer on tour. Adam was invited to the Grammys where he was up for best new artist, best male pop vocal performance, album of the year, record of the year and best Pop vocal album. Kris agreed to go with him but no matter how much Adam and Brad prodded him, he would only wear a traditional tux. They arrived at the Grammy’s and were bombarded by interviewers. Once again, Adam was grateful he was with someone that had dealt with these events. Even though Kris claimed he never had Adam’s fanatic fans and Elvis like affect on people, he could handle the attention.

Once inside, they both relaxed and tried to enjoy the show. Adam could care less if he won anything because the real prize was next to him. Adam was shocked when he won. Kris pushed him,

“You won, Adam. Get up there and get your award.”

Adam went up and smiled, “Thank you, everyone. Wow, this is amazing. Of course I want to thank everyone that helped make the album, the label, family, friends, and fans. Most of all I want to thank my boyfriend, Kris, who put his whole career on hold to support me. I love you and next year it’s your turn.”

 

FIN


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